


Must Have Done Something Right

by transboykobrakid (Lucipoo)



Series: Youth Group is Wild [1]
Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Religious, F/M, Homeschool, Homophobia, M/M, Masturbation, Multi, Non-Binary/Questioning Gerard, Polyamory, Public Blow Jobs, Trans Character, Underage Drinking, Youth Group
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-22
Updated: 2017-03-30
Packaged: 2018-04-27 15:41:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 142,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5054434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucipoo/pseuds/transboykobrakid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Frank was the new punk gay kid at Gerard's youth group, and Gerard wasn't sure how to handle his feelings about him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Leviticus 19:12

**Author's Note:**

> this is what happens when u are a fucking loser homeschooler who has too much time on ur hands
> 
> ur welcome
> 
> ((also don't try to make any sense of the ages cause they don't make sense okay just go w it))

Gerard looked in the mirror and sighed. He looked absolutely terrible. His hair was all over the place, dark circles surrounded his eyes, and the only shirt he had that wasn't completely disgusting was a giant, stained Relient K t-shirt. He wished he didn't have to go anywhere, he just wanted to get some fucking sleep, but there was no getting out of church. The only way he could get out of going to church is if he literally started coughing up blood, but sadly he didn't have that fake blood Mikey bought during Halloween anymore, so he had to go.

Gerard pulled at his hair and sighed again. Maybe he could just lock himself in the bathroom until his family had to leave, but he couldn't do that to Mikey. They had to stick together, even if it meant going to church when he _really_ didn't want to. At least he had friends there, that was the one good thing about church. It was the only place he had any social interaction outside of Mikey.

A sudden, loud knock on the bathroom door brought Gerard out of his thoughts.

“Honey, are you almost done in there? We have to leave in 15 minutes.” Gerard's mom said through the door.

“Yeah, I'm almost done.” Gerard replied.

“Alright, just making sure you were ready.”

Gerard ran his fingers through his hair, trying to make it at least somewhat presentable. After a few minutes, he finally gave up, deciding he didn't care if people saw how much of a mess he was.

Gerard left the bathroom and went to the kitchen, seeing if there was still any coffee. He sighed in relief when he saw the half-full pot and poured himself a cup.

“You look like shit.” Mikey said, leaning against the door frame.

“Shut up, I know I do. Not like you look any better. Have you gotten any sleep?” Gerard asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

Mikey laughed, “I think you know the answer to that question.”

“Yeah, me too.” Gerard leaned his head against the wall, “God, I'm so tired. I'm gonna need a lot of coffee to make it through the day.”

“Yeah, me too. That's why I came in here, I could smell the coffee from inside the shower.”

Gerard laughed and shook his head, “I swear to God, you gave some sort of super power. It's getting ridiculous.”

Mikey grinned and poured coffee into a mug, “What can I say? I love coffee.”

Their mom popped her head through the doorway and smiled at them, “Ah, getting coffee I see. Well, make sure you're completely ready, we're leaving in 5 minutes. Oh, and Gerard, brush your hair. It looks ridiculous.”

Gerard pulled at his hair and rolled his eyes, “Yes, mom.”

“Thank you. Also, remember to bring the canned food tonight. It's the last day of the food drive and you still haven't brought anything, it's making us look bad.”

“It's not making us look bad, mom. We just keep forgetting.”

“Yeah, well don't forget this time. Anyway, brush your hair, we have to leave soon.” She smiled at them and left the kitchen.

Mikey grinned at Gerard, “You heard the woman, brush your hair.”

Gerard quickly drank the rest of his coffee and put the mug down, “Yeah, yeah. I know.”

Gerard shoved Mikey as he walked out of the kitchen and Mikey laughed.

Gerard went to his room and grabbed the brush from his desk, looking in the mirror as he tried to make his hair look at least slightly neater.

 _It's not like brushing it will make it look better_ , Gerard thought.

There was a knock on his door, followed by his dad saying, “Come on, Gerard. We have to go.”

“Yeah, one second.” Gerard threw the brush on his bed, then quickly put on a hoodie and left his room.

“Wow, you look terrible. Are you okay?” His dad asked.

Gerard rolled his eyes, “Gee, thanks dad. You're too kind.”

“What? You look sick! I'm just making sure I don't have to take you to the hospital.”

Gerard pulled the hood over his head and groaned, “You're not helping with my self confidence, dad.”

"You gotta admit you look sick, son. You're all pale and have large dark circles around your eyes and-”

“Oh my God-”

“Don't take the Lord's name in vain.”

“-Gosh, I get it. I'll like, go outside more or something, happy?”

“Yes I am, actually.”

They got to the car where Mikey and their mom were waiting. Mikey grinned at Gerard as he got into the car and said, “Was dad scolding you for how you look again?”

“Yeah, he was. How'd you know?”

“We have a psychic link, remember? Also, you look all pouty and your hood is up.”

Gerard lowered his hood and rolled his eyes, “I do not look pouty.”

Mikey laughed, “Yeah, you kinda do.”

Gerard shoved him, and their mom said, “Boys, calm down back there.”

“Yes, mom.” They said in unison.

“Thank you.”

The rest of the car ride was quiet, except for their parents occasionally talking about what they were doing for Thanksgiving dinner. All that talking about food made Gerard realize that he didn't eat breakfast, a decision his stomach was making sure he would regret. But it wasn't unusual for him to go to church with nothing but coffee in his stomach, so he knew how to ignore it.

Plus, he could always steal goldfish crackers from the Sunday school class rooms.

“Oh, hey mom! Remember that I'm going to Pete's house after church, so he's just going to drive me to youth group instead of dropping me off first.” Mikey said, breaking the silence and pulling Gerard out of his thoughts.

“Yeah, okay honey. Is he just going to take you home with him?”

“Yeah, and Josh and Tyler. Also, possibly Nate.”

Gerard sniggered, “Nate's going too?”

“I think Pete felt bad for him.”

“Hey, be nice! Nate is a very nice kid.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “Yes, mom.”

They pulled into the church parking lot and got out. Mikey and Gerard walked behind their parents, and Gerard smirked at Mikey.

“So... Party at Pete's house... Gonna play some fun games? Fun games like, truth or dare, never have I ever, or. oh, I don't know, just throwing things around here, spin the bottle?”

Mikey blushed and shoved Gerard, “Oh my god, shut up! We're not going to play spin the bottle, Gerard. _Tyler_ is going dude, do you _really_ think he would let us play spin the bottle? No, no he would not. We're probably just gonna play video games or something.”

Gerard wiggled his eyebrows, “But I bet you wish you would play spin the bottle. Bet you wish the bottle would land on Pete and you'd be able to kiss him without consequences.”

Mikey slapped Gerard on the arm, his face crimson, “Be quiet!! What if someone hears you? No one can know that I like-”

“Mikeyway! What's up dude? Ready for later? I'm totally gonna kick your ass in Mario Kart.” Pete said with a grin.

Mikey's face got redder and he stuttered out, “Uhm, yeah. I uh, I can't wait.”

“Cool man! Well, see you later. I gotta go take care of some toddlers, yo. Actually, wait, you're coming with me. The regular chick never comes when I'm helping so I need backup.” Pete grabbed Mikey's hand and pulled him away from Gerard. Mikey turned and mouthed 'help me' to Gerard, but he just gave Mikey a thumbs up.

Gerard laughed to himself as Mikey got dragged away by Pete to deal with a dozen screaming children for two hours. He made his way to the coffee machine, figuring that if he was going to stay awake during the service he would need at least one more cup of coffee.

Ray was standing by the coffee, pouring himself a cup. He grinned when Gerard approached and added creamer to his coffee.

“Morning, Gerard. Sleep well?”

“This is my second cup of coffee in the past 30 minutes, what do you think?”

Ray patted his shoulder sympathetically, “That's tough man. You should get Mikey to read you a bedtime story every night.”

Gerard snorted, “I'm pretty sure that wouldn't work.”

Ray grinned, “It'd be pretty funny, though. Where is he anyway? You two are usually glued at the hip.”

“Pete's forcing him to help with nursery duty. Apparently Pete doesn't want to be left alone with a bunch of screaming children.”

“Maybe it's because he is also a screaming child and he doesn't like to be around his own kind.”

Gerard laughed, “Yeah, that's probably the case.”

Ray took a sip of his coffee, then perked up as if he just remembered something.

“Oh, dude, there's a new kid here today. His name is Frank, I think you'll like him. He's really cool.” Ray looked around the room, trying to find Frank, but to no use.

“Damn, I don't see him. Well, maybe we'll see him after the service, or maybe tonight.”

“Speaking of service, lets go before anyone takes our seats.”

“You do know they aren't actually _our_ seats, right?” Ray asked while they walked.

“They _basically_ are.” Gerard replied as they entered the sanctuary.

Ray laughed and shook his head, “Yeah, that's true.”

They made their way over to their section of seats in the back of the room. Tyler and Josh were already sitting down, Josh looking at his phone and Tyler leaning over a seat to talk to Jenna, who was sitting a few rows in front of them.

“Hey, Josh. What's up, man?” Ray asked, putting his jacket on the back of one of the seats.

Josh looked up from his phone and smiled at Ray, “Nothing really, just talking to this girl, Ashley, that I met as school. Where's Mikey and Pete?”

“Nursery duty.” Ray replied as he sat down.

“Well, technically Pete was the one with nursery duty. He just made Mikey help him.” Gerard added, sitting down in between Josh and Ray.

“Do you really trust those two alone with a bunch of kids?”

Gerard laughed, “No, no I do not.”

“Hopefully they don't eat all the snacks. Don't want those poor kids to starve.”

“Yeah, hopefully. Wait, Josh, who's this girl, Ashley or whatever, that you mentioned?” Gerard asked, leaning back in his chair.

Tyler sat down and laughed, “She's this girl from school. He met her in music and he totally likes her, but won't admit it.”

Josh rolled his eyes, “I don't like her! I just think she's really cool. And she always has really awesome hair! Can't a guy think a girl is awesome without wanting to date her?”

“Yeah, but you also have said many times that she is 'extremely beautiful' and is 'totally out of my league anyway.'”

“That's because she is! Have you seen her? She looks like an angel. A beautiful angel with blue hair.”

“Yeah, it totally sounds like you like her.” Gerard said with a laugh.

“Shut up, Gerard.”

“You should bring her to youth group, so we can see this 'angel with blue hair.'”

“No, cause then you'd be all up in her face and acting really weird. I want her to think my friends are normal, thank you very much.”

“Hmm, that's true. We probably would tell her the hot sauce story.”

Josh's eyes widened in horror, “You wouldn't!”

Ray grinned and wiggled his eyebrows, “Oh, we would.”

Josh crossed his arms and looked straight ahead, “Yep, that's settled. I am definitely not inviting her to youth group. _Ever_.”

Ray was holding back laughter and Gerard patted Josh on the back sympathetically, “Don't worry, I won't tell this blue haired angel anything about your fiery night of passion with Ray.”

Josh buried his face in his hands, “It was a dare! Jesus Christ...”

Ray started laughing harder, and Gerard had to shush him, “Dude, dude be quiet. The worship team is up, dude.”

Ray covered his mouth with his hand, holding back his laughter, as they stood up for worship.

\--------

The group of friends walked out of the sanctuary together, headed towards the nursery.

“I told you the pastor was going to be wearing another Hawaiian print shirt today, Jenna!” Tyler said with a laugh.

“Well, I figured he would, but I didn't realize it would be the _same_ _shirt_ as last week!”

“I wonder if he only has Hawaiian print shirts...” Ray mumbled.

“Well, he as at least one dress shirt.” Gerard said.

“Because of Easter and Christmas?”

“Yeah, exactly.”

“Dude, I'm pretty sure he has been wearing the same dress shirt every Christmas for the past 5 years.”

Jenna jokingly shoved Josh and he laughed, “What? A couple years ago he spilled cranberry juice on his shirt and I can _still_ see the stain. He definitely wears the same shirt every Christmas and Easter.”

Gerard and Ray started laughing, and Jenna rolled her eyes, “Whatever, he still probably has shirts other then his Hawaiian print shirts in his wardrobe.”

They arrived at the nursery as josh said, “Do you have any proof of this? Have you seen the inside of his closet? Jenna, you dirty, dirty sinner.”

Pete looked up from a coloring book he was drawing in and asked, “Why is Jenna a dirty sinner?”

“She snoops around in the pastor's closet.” Josh replied.

Mikey laughed as he poured himself a cup of apple juice, “Jenna, why do you snoop around in Mark's closet?”

Jenna punched Josh in the shoulder and he laughed. She rolled her eyes and turned to Mikey, “I do not go through Mark's closet! Josh just said that because I said he probably doesn't only have Hawaiian print shirts.”

Pete ate a handful of goldfish crackers and said, “Nah, he definitely only has Hawaiian print shirts. Trust me, I am a dirty closet snooper.”

“My mom said it's rude to talk with your mouth full of food.” A little kid, who was coloring with Pete, said.

“Your mom is rude.” Pete said, sticking his tongue out at the kid.

Ray leaned over to Gerard and whispered, “See, I told you he was just another child.”

Gerard started laughing as Pete grinned at the annoyed kid. Tyler cleared his throat and asked, “Uh, Pete? When are we gonna go?”

Pete turned to him and replied, “Whenever his parents pick him up.”

Josh walked over and sat next to Pete, grabbing the box of goldfish crackers and taking a handful.

“So, are Ray and Gerard coming to your house too, or is it just gonna be the four of us?”

“No, I'm not going. I have important things to do, like sleep.” Gerard said.

Pete laughed, “Yeah, and Ray is probably too cool for us, right?”

“Damn right I am.”

Tyler slapped Ray's arm lightly, “Don't cuss in front of the kid.”

Mikey started laughing, “I'm pretty sure he has heard a lot worse things in the past couple hours than 'damn.'”

Jenna stared at Pete and Mikey with wide eyes, “Why did anyone leave you in charge of children?”

“Because children love us! Isn't that right, Charlie?” Pete said, still grinning.

“No, I fucking hate you.”

Pete patted him on the shoulder and laughed, “Yes, that's nice. Just remember not to say any of the words we said outside of this room, okay? Especially in front of your parents.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Right then, a woman came into the nursery and said, “Hi, Charlie! You ready to go? Sorry it took me a while to pick you up, I got held up. But I hope you had a fun time with these young men.”

Charlie got up and nodded. His mom turned to Pete and smiled, “I hope he wasn't difficult.”

Pete grinned back, “Nah, he was fine. Have a good day!”

“You too!” She took Charlie's hand and left the room.

“Man, I really hope he doesn't go home and start cursing up a storm. They'd definitely blame us.”

Pete shrugged, “Eh, who cares. They'll just ban us from working in the nursery again.” He got up, grabbed his jacket from the chair, and put it on.

“Yeah, that's true.”

They all left the nursery and headed outside. Jenna waved goodbye, then ran over to Hayley and Sarah.

Josh stopped walking and asked, “Wait, so Pete, is it just going to be the four of us?”

“Oh, no, it isn't. Patrick, my friend from school, is coming too. Also Nate.”

Tyler and Josh groaned, and Pete rolled his eyes, “What?”

“Did you _really_ invite Nate?” Tyler asked.

“I wasn't planning to, but he heard me talking to Mikey about it and asked when it was and I told him.”

“Yeah but like, it's _Nate_.”

“I know! But what else was I supposed to do? I didn't to seem like a dick. Also, he isn't actually _that_ bad. He's just a little weird.”

“Yeah, but you kind of are a dick, Pete.” Gerard laughed.

“Okay, that's true. But you know what I mean!”

Ray laughed and patted Pete on the shoulder, “Well, you guys have fun doing whatever the hell you're doing. I gotta go, though. So, bye. See you later."

Ray waved as he walked away. Gerard waved back, the turned to Mikey and put his hand on Mikey's shoulder, “I probably should leave to, so bye guys. Don't have too much fun without me.”

He winked at Mikey, then turned to go find his parents.


	2. Philippians 4:8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey froze up at the mention of truth or dare. Truth or dare never ends well, especially for a bi kid who's playing with a bunch of Christians.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yooo here's the next chapter friends I hope u enjoy it :-)

Pete groaned and threw his controller on the ground in frustration. Josh was sitting next to him on the couch and was laughing hysterically.

“Dude, you fucking suck at Mario Kart!” Josh said through his laughter.

“No I don't! Mikey just keeps blue shelling me!”

Mikey smiled sheepishly and shrugged, “What? You totally suck anyway.”

Pete rolled his eyes, “Yeah, whatever. We should play something else.”

Tyler grinned, “What, afraid to get beat again, Wentz?”

“No, I'm just getting bored with Mario Kart. We've been playing it for the past hour. We should totally play truth or dare! Truth or dare is always fun.”

Mikey froze up at the mention of truth or dare. Truth or dare never ends well, especially for a bi kid who's playing with a bunch of Christians.

“Yeah, we totally should!” Patrick said from his place on the floor.

“It's settled then, we're playing truth or dare!” Pete grinned and moved onto the ground.

Josh shrugged and sat next to Pete, “Yeah, might as well. What's the worse that could happen?”

“Hot sauce.” Tyler said while fake coughing, then sat next to Josh.

Josh shoved him, “Shut up! That shit was painful, dude.”

“Yeah, but it also was pretty funny.” Mikey sat in between Pete and Patrick and laughed.

“What are you guys talking about?” Patrick asked.

“Oh, uh, this one time at summer camp Josh was dared to-”

“Don't you dare tell him!” Josh interrupted Pete.

“Fine, I won't tell him right now. But whatever, let's get this game started. Nate, sit down.”

Nate nodded and sat in between Tyler and Patrick. Pete clapped his hands together and grinned, “Great! So, who's gonna go first?”

“I want to go first.” Josh grinned, then looked around the circle, deciding who he was going to pick.

“Hmm... Pete, truth or dare?”

Pete laughed, “Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously. You're the one who made us play this, so you get to go first. So, truth or dare?”

“Uh... dare?" Pete said hesitantly.

“Alright! I dare you to, uh, straddle Mikey for the whole game.”

Mikey's eyes widened and he wanted to protest, wanted to refuse, but decided to suck it up and go along. There wasn't any reason why he wouldn't want Pete to do it, other than the fact that he had a massive crush on the guy.

Pete shrugged and moved to straddle Mikey. He positioned himself so they were both comfortable and grinned, “Y'know, this isn't even that bad. Mikey has a very comfortable lap. I could definitely see myself sitting here again in the future.”

Pete grinned wider and started bouncing and moving around on Mikey's lap, making Mikey want to scream. Pete was making this really hard for him, in more ways than one.

“Okay, settle down, Pete. Who are you going to pick?” Tyler asked.

Pete looked Mikey in the eye and licked his lips, and Mikey tried hard to not stare at his mouth. Pete draped his arms over Mikey's shoulders and grinned, “Uh, Mikey, since you're basically the only one I can see right now, truth or dare?'

Mikey was getting distracted by the way Pete was bouncing, but was able to stutter out, “Dare?”

Pete bounced happily, “Yes! I was hoping you would say that! I dare you to make out with Nate.”

Nate groaned and Mikey rolled his eyes, “Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously! Go make out with Nate! Or, wait, I have to stay straddling you. Nate come make out with Mikey.”

“No, no one is going to make out with anybody! Nothing sexual, guys.” Tyler said, making Mikey sigh in relief.

“Ugh, fine. You're such a party pooper, Tyler.” Pete turned and stuck his tongue out at Tyler, making Tyler roll his eyes.

“So, uhm, I guess I'll switch to truth?” Mikey asked, hoping this would turn out better.

“Yeah, okay. Uhm... have you ever thought about giving a guy a blow job? Like, what it would be like and shit.”

Mikey wanted to bury himself alive because here Pete was, bouncing away happily on Mikey's lap and asking him about blow jobs. He really was a dick.

A _really_ cute dick who _really_ needed to stop bouncing and licking his lips.

“No? I mean, maybe? No- yes? I don't know.” Mikey's face turned bright red and Pete grinned, not helping with his embarrassment.

Pete laughed and licked his lips again, “You totally have, haven't you? That's totally alright. I mean, who hasn't?”

“I haven't...” Tyler mumbled.

“That's because you're weird, Tyler. It's just a thing you think about sometimes. Doesn't mean you'll actually do it, it's just one of those things.”

Josh shrugged, “Yeah, I guess. I mean, I haven't really either, but whatever. Anyway, Mikey, your turn”

“Yeah, uh, okay. Patrick, truth or dare?”

“I'll go with dare.”

“Okay, uhm, do a sexy dance?”

Patrick sighed and got up. He started slowly taking off his cardigan, then threw it across the room, sitting down immediately after.

“That's all you're getting from me.”

“Woo! Go Patrick! You're so hot!”

“He sat down, Pete.”

“I know, but I'm pretty sure he still looks hot.”

Patrick rolled his eyes, “You're ridiculous, Pete. But, truth or dare?”

Pete started stroking Mikey's hair, making Mikey blush.

“Me again? Hmm... I'm gonna go with truth this time.”

“Okay... uh, how big is your dick?”

Pete grinned and looked Mikey in the eye as he said, “Easy! It's twelve inches.”

“You have to tell the truth, Pete.”

“I am telling the truth!”

“No, you aren't.”

Pete rolled his eyes, “Ugh, fine. Seven inches.”

“Are we talking hard or soft?” Josh asked.

“I'm talking hard. Why?”

“That just sounds bigger than mine.”

“Don't worry, dude. I've seen your dick, it's a good dick. Wanna compare dick sizes?” Pete turned his head so he was looking at Josh.

“Nah, you have to stay sitting on Mikey. You can compare dick sizes with him, though.”

Pete turned back to Mikey and grinned as he reached down and played with his pants button, “So, wanna compare dick sizes?”

“No, no! No comparing dick sizes! That's too sexual, Pete.”

Pete groaned and leaned his head on Mikey's shoulder, “Ugh, you're so boring, Tyler. Why won't you let us do anything fun?”

Tyler crossed his arms, “Comparing dick sizes isn't fun, Pete. You have an odd definition of fun. Are you like, gay or something?”

“No, I'm not gay. Jeez, you can be kind of annoying, Tyler. Since you're ruining my fun, truth or dare?”

Tyler sighed, “Truth, I guess. I don't trust you enough to pick dare.”

“That's probably a smart decision. But anyway, do you like Jenna?”

Tyler blushed, “Well, obviously I like her as a friend-”

“You know what I mean by like, Tyler. Also, don't even try to hide it, it's super obvious. You basically make heart eyes whenever someone _mentions_ her, let alone when you're talking to her.”

“Ugh, fine! I have a gigantic crush on Jenna! Happy?”

Pete grinned, “Yes, yes I am actually.”

Josh grinned, “I totally knew it! I was just waiting for you to actually tell me.”

“Wait, he didn't tell you yet? I thought you guys told each other everything.”

Josh shoved Tyler lightly, “Nah, he was too nervous to tell even me. But I obviously knew.”

“Yeah, obviously. But it's not like you like anyone, right mister 'blue haired angel.'” Tyler smirked and crossed his arms.

Josh grinned, “Tyler, your words are so kind. I've never been called a blue haired angel before! I'm touched!”

Tyler rolled his eyes, “You know what I mean! You totally like Ashley, dude!”

Josh groaned, “I don't like her like that! She's just a friend.”

“You literally called her a beautiful blue haired angel, that is not you just liking her as a friend.”

“Yeah, okay, I have no idea who she is, but even I can tell that you totally like her.” Patrick said with a laugh.

“Hey, we should just talk about our crushes!” Nate grinned.

Pete bounced more, “Yeah, we totally should do that!”

Mikey blushed and looked away from Pete and at the ground. This was the worst case scenario that Mikey always dreaded happening, and everything was made worse for him considering the guy he liked was currently _sitting on his lap_. He just hoped they wouldn't go around in a circle and just let it be like popcorn prayer.

“Also, we should go around the circle so none of you bitches can get out of it. Don't worry, though, none of this will leave the circle.”

Mikey _really_ wanted to die now. Things would only get worse, unless he lied and said he liked Sarah or something, which was what he probably was going to do.

Pete turned towards Nate, “You can go first, since it was your idea.”

Nate rolled his eyes, “Yeah, fine. Her name is Erza.”

“Ooh Nate has a crush!! So, what's she like?” Josh asked.

“Okay, uhm, she's tall, has long red hair, beautiful brown eyes.”

“At least it sounds like she's actually real this time.” Pete whispered in Mikey's ear.

“-And she's a courageous warrior who has the ability to summon weapons whenever she needs them-”

“Never mind.” Pete whispered again, laughing softly.

“Nate, I swear to god, is she from an anime again?” Josh asked.

“Uhm... yes?” Nate said as if it was obvious.

Everyone in the circle groaned.

“Nate, when we said crush we meant like an actual physical person.”

“Hey! She totally still counts!”

Pete rolled his eyes, “That's debatable, but whatever. Patrick, it's your turn.”

“Well, I mean, no one here even knows her...” Patrick mumbled.

“That doesn't matter! I'll know her and I want to know.” Pete turned and grinned at Patrick.

“Ugh, fine! It's Elisa.”

Pete bounced happily, “Hah! I fucking knew it! You guys would be so cute together.”

Patrick rolled his eyes and blushed, “Oh, shut up.”

“It's true! You two are going to get together and have a million babies.”

“But I don't want a million babies-”

“You will have a million babies and that's final.” Pete turned back to Mikey, “And since we're so great with kids, we can babysit!”

Mikey laughed, “Dude, that is not a good idea. I'm pretty sure those kids from this morning are going to be cursing like sailors for the rest of their lives.”

“Yeah, that's true. Their parents have probably already started having to deal with their colorful new vocabularies.”

“But we told them not to say any of those words outside of Sunday school.”

“They're probably going to disobey us, Mikey. Like Charlie said, they fucking hate us.”

“No, they hate _you_. I'm the cool one who gave them extra snacks. They love me.”

Pete rolled his eyes, “Okay, that's true, but that's just because no one could hate you. But anyway, it's your turn to tell us who you like, if you even like anyone.”

Mikey cleared his throat and looked at the ground, trying to hide his blush. He could just name a random girl he knew, or just say he didn't have a crush.

“Oh, come on, Mikey! Just tell us!”

“Uh, yeah, I uh, do like someone.” Mikey stuttered out, still not looking up.

Pete grinned, “Now you gotta tell us who it is, dude. Is it someone we know?”

“Dude, I'm homeschooled and my only source of social interaction outside of Gerard and the internet is youth group, of course it's someone you know.”

“Well then tell us! We won't tell her, if that's what you're worried about.” Josh said.

“No it's not a- it's uh, no, yeah, never mind.”

Pete took Mikey's head in his hands and looked him in the eye, “No 'never mind''s here, Way. You gotta tell us! Or, we could guess it? You just have to tell us if we get it right.”

Patrick stood up, “Okay, I've had to go pee for the past twenty minutes, so I'm gonna go, since I won't be able to guess. Tell me if anything interesting happens.”

Pete watched Patrick leave, then turned back to Mikey. He started stroking Mikey's hair again and asked, “Hm, okay... is it Sarah?”

“Uh, no.”

“Hayley?” Josh asked.

“No...”

“Is it Jenna?” Tyler asked, glaring at Mikey.

“No, it's not Jenna. You don't have to worry, dude.”

“Ariel?” Nate asked.

“Nope.”

“Okay... so it's Debby.”

“Uh, no. It isn't Debby.” Mikey was looking back at the floor, suddenly very interested in the pattern of the carpet.

“Dude, who the hell is it? Is it like, Breezy or something?”

“What? No! That's weird, dude! She's one of our leaders, for God's sake.”

“Agh, well I don't know! God, just tell us, Mikey! We won't care!”

Mikey sighed and closed his eyes, then whispered, “It's Pete...”

Pete leaned closer to Mikey, “What was that? Even I couldn't hear you.”

“I uh, I said it's you. Uh, yeah, it's you Pete.” Mikey was staring hard at the floor, trying to not see Pete's reaction.

“Oh.” Pete slowly leaned away from Mikey's face and awkwardly got off his lap. Mikey hugged his knees tightly and felt like he was going to be sick. Why did he tell the truth? He should have just lied like he originally planned.

“Yo, I'm back. Hey, Pete, you got off Mikey! That means you lost, dude.” Patrick looked around the circle and noticed how tense it had gotten.

“I was gone for like, 4 minutes, what the hell happened?”

“Mikey's gay and has a crush on Pete.” Tyler replied.

Mikey buried his face in his knees and tried to fight back tears. He eventually got up and said, “I uh, I also have to go to the bathroom.”

Mikey quickly got up and left the room. He locked himself in the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. He sighed and splashed cold water on his face, mumbling, “Okay, so you might have just lost all of your friends. No big deal. Nothing... nothing wrong with that.”

He started tearing up again and slid down the bathroom door, hugging his knees and trying hard to hold back his tears. Eventually, he gave up, letting the tears flow down his face. He couldn't believe he did that. He figured that when he came out it wouldn't be during a game of truth or dare, it would be in private. A one-on-one sort of ordeal with only Pete, probably. Maybe eventually coming out to everyone else, but definitely not like that. Definitely not during a dumb game with the guy he liked _sitting on his fucking lap_.

A few minutes passed, and Mikey dug his phone out of his pocket, texting Gerard to come pick him up.

 _Is everything alright? I thought u were staying the whole day_ Gerard replied

_yeah I just.... I wanna go home_

_okay I'll be there as soon as I can_

Mikey waited in the bathroom for a few more minutes, before getting up and looking in the mirror again. He looked like he had been crying, which he had been, but he didn't want people to realize that. He rubbed his eyes and tried to clean up; he still looked like a mess, though.

Mikey sighed and ran a hand through his hair, then finally left the bathroom. He walked back to where everyone else was and they all went quiet when he entered the room, simultaneously trying not to look at him and staring at him.

Mikey cleared his throat and said, “So uhm, Gerard is coming to pick me up. So uh, yeah. He'll probably be here in ten or so minutes.”

Pete nodded, but still wouldn't look at Mikey. Patrick looked around at everyone and asked, “Okay, why are you guys acting so weird?”

“Mikey's gay!” Tyler exclaimed.

“Actually, I'm bi...” Mikey mumbled.

“Whatever! You know what I mean! But you also like, _like_ Pete! That's weird, dude. He's your friend.”

“Yeah, and you like Jenna! She's your friend! Why is it weird for me to like a cute, funny guy that I'm friends with, but normal for you? Oh wait, I know! It's because you're fucking homophobic.”

“Guys, guys! Calm down! It's not that big of a deal!” Patrick glared at Tyler, then turned to Mikey, “Are you alright?”

Mikey shrugged, “I guess.”

“You look like you've been crying.” Nate pointed out.

Mikey looked down and rubbed his eyes, muttering, “Maybe that's because I just came out to a bunch of homophobic dicks.” Then he looked up at Patrick and added, “Also Patrick.”

“One time I read a yaoi manga.” Nate said quietly, then added, “Okay, it was more than once.”

“What's yaoi...?” Josh asked.

“It doesn't matter.” Nate replied, looking at the carpet with great interest.

Mikey felt uncomfortable just standing in the doorway, so he walked over and sat beside Patrick. Patrick gave him a sympathetic smile and patted him on the shoulder. Pete still wasn't looking at him, but he also wasn't flinching away or kicking him out of the house, so he figured that was a good thing.

Mikey almost wished Pete would just freak out, call him a fag and punch him in the face or something. Being ignored almost felt worse. Not that he wanted Pete to be homophobic, that's the opposite of what he wanted. He just wanted Pete to say something, _anything_.

At least he knew what Tyler thought of the situation, since he's one of the only ones who had said anything. Josh just kept giving him weird looks and Nate didn't really seem to care. Of course, there was also Patrick, who Mikey currently liked most out of everyone in the circle. He always had been incredibly nice, so Mikey wasn't surprised that he was fine with Mikey being bi.

“One time I was at the movies and this guy randomly came up to me and started talking to me. I thought he was just being friendly, but then he asked for my number and I realized that he was coming on to me.” Josh said, breaking the silence and making Mikey want to lock himself back in the bathroom.

“I have a lot of guys flirt with me at work, and one time I asked one of my coworkers why he thought this might happen and he said that I 'give off a vibe.' Not sure what he meant by that.” Pete laughed, talking or the first time since Mikey got back.

“It's probably just 'cause you're a really outgoing guy who gets into people's personal space a lot. They probably mistake that as you being flirty.” Josh replied.

Pete glanced at Mikey for a second, then said, “Yeah, maybe that's it.”

Mikey felt a buzzing in his pocket and pulled out his phone to see a text from Gerard.

_hey im here_

Mikey shoved his phone back in his pocket and stood up, “Uhm, Gerard's here so, uh, yeah. Bye.”

Patrick smiled at him, “Yeah, okay. Bye, Mikey. See you later.”

“Yeah, bye Patrick.” Mikey waited a few seconds, then sighed and left when he realized no one else was going to say anything.

When he got outside, Gerard was waiting outside of his car in the driveway. He smiled when he saw Mikey and asked, “Is everything okay? What happened?”

Mikey shrugged, “Don't want to talk about it right now.”

They got into the car and Gerard sighed, “Yeah, okay. But I will be asking you again later, okay? Don't like seeing my baby brother look so upset.”

“I don't look upset...” Mikey mumbled.

“Yes, you do. But that's alright! I'll just fight whoever upset you.”

Mikey snorted, “I don't think you could win a fight with a butterfly.”

“Hey! That's not true! I'll have you know that I got into a fight with a butterfly last week and only had three broken bones afterward!”

Mikey laughed, “I'm pretty sure that counts as you losing.”

“Nah, he totally looked worse. Trust me.” Gerard grinned.

Mikey started laughing more and Gerard watched him, happy that he didn't look as miserable. The rest of the drive was quiet, which made Mikey start thinking again. He wondered if they were talking about him now that he was gone. They probably were. He was an actual, real life homosexual to them- even though he was actually bi- so of course they would be talking about him. He just hoped that they didn't spread this around. He already probably just lost all his friends, but he didn't want his parents finding out too.

Mikey's thoughts quickly turned to Pete, and he felt like he was going to be sick again. Pete was his best friend, they had been friends since they were kids and Mikey hoped this wouldn't change things. Pete didn't seem like he was homophobic, so Mikey figured he wouldn't freak out or something. Maybe just act a little weird at first, then go back to normal. That's what he hoped was happening now, give him until next week and everything will go back to normal. It probably didn't help that he came out while Pete was _sitting_ on him.

By the time they got home, Mikey was on the verge of tears again. He quickly got out of the car and ran to his room, locking the door behind him and falling onto his bed. He hugged his pillow and listened to Gerard's footsteps approach his room.

There was a quick knock on his door, followed by Gerard saying, “Hey, Mikey, can I come in?”

“Yeah, one second.” Mikey sighed and got up to open the door. Gerard came in and Mikey locked the door behind him. Mikey laid back down on his bed and Gerard sat next to him, stroking his hair softly. They stayed like that for a while, not saying or doing anything. Eventually, Mikey let out a shaky breath and said, “I kind of... came out to the guys today.”

Gerard's hand stilled, “Did they freak out? Is that why you're so upset?”

Mikey sat up and hugged his knees, “They didn't really... freak out exactly. Well, Tyler kind of did. They more just started acting weird and kinda ignoring me. Well, except for Patrick. Patrick just kinda shrugged and said, 'Yeah okay, some people are gay. Who cares. Doesn't change anything.'”

“Oh, okay. I guess it could have been worse. But how did it happen?”

“Well, we were playing truth or dare and Pete asked Tyler if he had a crush on Jenna- which he totally does, by the way.”

Gerard grinned, “Fucking called it.”

Mikey laughed, “Yeah, that's basically what everyone there said. But then Nate had the brilliant idea of us all saying our crushes, and when it came to me I was going to lie and say I liked Sarah or something-”

“She is very pretty.”

“Exactly. But, I somehow ended up telling them that I liked Pete and, well, yeah.”

Gerard chewed his bottom lip in thought, then asked, “How did Pete take this?”

“He kind of moved away from me and like, wouldn't look at me.”

“Oh.” Gerard ran a hand through his hair, then continued, “Do you think he might have been acting like that 'cause one of his best friends likes him?”

Mikey shrugged, “I don't know... maybe? Hopefully.”

"Okay, well we'll see. I take it you probably don't want to go to youth group tonight?”

Mikey laughed, “Yeah, definitely don't want to go.”

Gerard patted him on the shoulder, “That's understandable. We can just curl up on the couch together and eat way too much ice cream while we cry about boys and watch shitty romantic comedies.”

“That is so, so gay and exactly what I need right now. You know me too well.”

Gerard grinned, “That's because we're brothers. Now, come on! Let's get some ice cream in you.”


	3. Romans 6:1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I could always come out, too. Make both of us the outcasts.”
> 
> Mikey leaned his head on Gerard's head, “Nah, you don't have to do that. I don't want to make things worse for you too.”
> 
> “Okay, but if anyone calls you a faggot I swear to God I will stand on a table and start yelling about how I love big, juicy dicks.”
> 
> Mikey burst into laughter, “Yeah! That will show those filthy homophobes who's boss!!”

The next couple days went by with nothing interesting happening, as usual. Gerard and Mikey just spent the days throwing grapes into each others mouths and making jokes about their school work. 

Wednesday came quickly, and Gerard figured that Mikey still wouldn't be up for going to church. Most of the youth didn't even show up to the Wednesday night service, but Tyler was usually there and, according to Mikey, he didn't exactly take the news of Mikey's sexuality the best. Their parents never made them go to the mid-week service, or youth group, so it wasn't that big of a deal that they didn't go. But this night, like many others before it, was spent listening to music on full volume and drinking way too much coffee.

Gerard had put on his mom's pink lipstick and was impersonating Elle Woods, when their parents came home. Mikey was laughing hysterically on the couch while Gerard quickly wiped off the lipstick. Their mm stomped into the living room and put her hands on her hips.

“Michael James Way, I need to speak to you.”

Mikey quickly stopped laughing and sat up straight. Gerard looked at her with wide eyes and slowly sat beside Mikey on the couch.

“I- what did I do?” Mikey asked, sounding panicky.

“Tyler's mom said that you- came on to Pete at his party on Sunday.”

Mikey's eyes grew wide, “What? Okay, that's not fair! Pete was dared to do that and it's not my fault that he started talking about blow jobs and his dick while he was sitting on my lap and-”

“Wait, what is this about him sitting on your lap?” Gerard asked.

“That isn't important! But, Michael, what are you talking about? She just told me that Tyler said that you said that you liked Pete. Now, is this true?”

Mikey sighed and drew his knees close to his chest, burying his face in them so his mother couldn't see his face. 

“Yeah, it's true.”

Their mom went quiet, then left the room. Gerard moved closer to Mikey and leaned his head on Mikey's shoulder. 

“It's going to be alright. Mom's not going to like, kick you out or something, she loves you too much to do that. But, if she did, I would totally move out and live with you under a bridge or something. Us brothers gotta stick together, right?”

Mikey let out a shaky laugh, “Yeah, I know you would. But I know she wouldn't kick me out, it's just... I don't know. Scary. My whole life I've heard her talking about homosexuality as this terrible sin, and the fact that now she knows I'm queer is... is really fucking scary. I feel like I'm gonna be sick.”

“I know, I know. But it will be okay, I promise. She'll probably just take away your phone for a while and glare at you whenever you look at a rainbow. But I understand where you're coming from, this isn't exactly the most pleasant situation.”

Mikey laughed again, “Yeah, probably. But you know? I'm honestly just pissed at Tyler. He told his fucking mom about me.”

“Hopefully he didn't tell anyone else, though.”

“He probably did.” Mikey groaned, “I'll never be able to show my face in youth group again. I'll be that queer kid who like Pete for the rest of eternity.”

“I could always come out, too. Make both of us the outcasts.”

Mikey leaned his head on Gerard's head, “Nah, you don't have to do that. I don't want to make things worse for you too.”

“Okay, but if anyone calls you a faggot I swear to God I will stand on a table and start yelling about how I love big, juicy dicks.”

Mikey burst into laughter, “Yeah! That will show those filthy homophobes who's boss!!”

Gerard grinned, “Exactly, it's a flawless plan. Also, it is not a lie. I love big dicks so much. The bigger the better, that's what I say. If a guy has a big dick, I'm down on my knees with his dick down my throat before he can finish saying '9 inches.'”

Mikey pulled away from Gerard and made a face, “Ew! Gross! I get it, you love dicks. Now please stop talking about it!”

Gerard laughed, “What? I thought it would lighten the mood! Oh, and speaking of dicks, what's this about Pete talking about his while he was sitting on your lap?”

Mikey shrugged, “You know, truth or dare.”

“That isn't a suitable answer and you know it, Mikey.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “Okay, fine. Josh dared Pete to straddle me for the whole game, and later Patrick asked Pete how big his dick was, happy?”

“Yes, I am.” Gerrad grinned and wiggled his eyebrows, “So, how big is it?”

Mikey blushed and stared at the ground when he replied, saying, “7 inches hard.”

Gerard laughed, “Nice. But, how do you know he isn't lying? What if it's actually like, 3 inches hard.”

“Nah, I don't think he's lying.”

“Why? Have you seen it?”

Mikey's face grew redder and he stuttered out, “N-no, it's just, y'know... I've seen his bulge...”

Gerard started grinning widely, “Michael James Way, have you been staring ta poor, poor Pete's crotch?”

Mikey buried his face in his hands, “It's not my fault he always wears skin tight pants!”

“Don't pay attention to Pete's crotch, Mikey. Pay attention to the Lord.”

Mikey punched Gerard in the arm, “Oh my God! You're the worst.”

Gerard started laughing uncontrollably, and Mikey pushed him off the couch. Gerard just stayed on the ground, arm thrown over his face as he laughed hysterically. Eventually, Mikey started laughing too, and Gerard pulled him off the couch and onto the floor with him, making Mikey yelp. 

“You dick!” Mikey yelled through his laughter.

“What? You pushed me off the couch first!” 

“What are you two doing down there?” Their mom asked, standing in the doorway with her arms crossed. They both quickly got off the ground, trying to calm themselves down.

“We were just, uh, laughing.” Mikey replied.

“On the floor? You know what, I don't want to know. I just wanted to say that your father and I talked, Mikey, and we decided that you are still allowed to go to youth group. Just try not to talk about... you know too much at church, okay? In fact, just try not to talk about it at all.”

Mikey nodded and look at the floor, “Yes, ma'am.”

“Okay, glad you understand. I also will be taking your phone for a little while, just in case, so please hand it over.”

Mikey nodded again and dug his phone out of his pocket, handing it over to his mom. She patted him on the shoulder and said, “I still love you, Mikey, I just think you're a little confused right now. You'll grow out of this, though. I'm sure of it.”

She squeezed his shoulder, then turned and left the room. Gerard hugged Mikey from behind, and Mikey turned and buried his face in Gerard's shoulder.

“It's okay, Mikey. She's wrong, you know. This isn't a phase.” Gerard said softly, stroking Mikey's hair.

Mikey let out a shaky breath, “I know, It's just- it kinda fucking sucks hearing her say that. To have someone, who is supposed to accept you no matter what, say that a major part of who you are is 'just a phase' and that 'you'll grow out of it' kinda just... yeah. It just sucks.”

Gerard rubbed Mikey's back comfortingly, “I know, but it'll be okay. One day she will have to accept that this is who you are, that this isn't a phase you'll grow out of. Now it might suck, but again, if it gets too bad for you, I'll come out too.”

Mikey laughed, “dude, if you came out too mom would have a heart attack. Having one queer kid is bad enough, but two? Imagine what would happen to her reputation!”

Gerard grinned, “That's true. It would be even worse if she found out that one of her kids was gasp! questioning his gender too!”

Mikey pulled away from the hug, “Yeah, true. Remember that time she almost found you doing your makeup?”

Gerard started giggling, “Oh yeah! I panicked and threw a towel over my face to hide the fact that I had a full face of makeup on.” He shook his head, “After that, I always made sure to lock the bathroom door whenever I did my makeup.”

Mikey sat back down on the couch and grabbed a pillow, “Did you ever figure out your gender and shit?”

Gerard shrugged and joined Mikey on the couch, “Nah, not yet. But, I'll get there eventually. Probably.”

“Alright, just keep me updated.”

“Will do.”

They were quiet for a few minutes, then Gerard started laughing again. Mikey turned to him and raised an eyebrow, “Why are you laughing?”

“I just realized we never dropped food off at the food drive.”

\-------

Gerard and Mikey walked into youth group nervously. It was the first time they had come to church since Mikey came out, so they weren't sure what to expect. Most people didn't notice them walking in, but Pete came over to them immediately. He looked at Mikey awkwardly and said, “Uh, hi, Mikey, Can I uhm, talk to you for a second? Like, over there.”

Pete gestured to an empty corner of the room and Mikey nodded, looking at the ground as he followed Pete. Gerard watched them walk away and hoped, for Mikey's sake, that Pete wasn't going to say anything bad.

Ray waved at Gerard and walked over to him with a smile on his face. “Hey, Gerard! How are you, man? You didn't come last week!”

“Oh, I- uh, something came up.”

“Ah, bummer. Well, hey! At least Frank came again tonight.”

“Frank?” Gerard asked, walking with Ray over to the couches.

“Yeah, Frank. The new kid I mentioned last week?”

“Oh, yeah, Frank. I remember now.”

“Awesome! He's really cool, I think you'll love him.” Ray turned to go find Frank, then suddenly looked back at Gerard and asked, “Wait, is the reason you didn't go least week because Mikey's gay?”

Gerard froze in his place, “Uhm, yeah... Well, actually he's bi, but uh, yeah.”

“Ah, okay. Well, you know what I meant. But, make sure Mikey knows I don't care, alright? I don't want him thinking I'm a bigoted asshole.”

“Uh, yeah. I'll tell him. Oh, but who exactly knows? About, you know, Mikey.”

Ray shrugged, “I think basically everyone? Tyler told a lot of people and news like that travels fast.”

Gerard looked at the ground, “Oh, okay.”

“Hey, chin up! Most people didn't seem to care and- oh! Oh, hey! There's Frank! Hey, Frank! Come over here! This is that Gerard that I was talking about!” Ray was waving a guy over, and Gerard turned so he could see him.

Gerard was so completely fucked.

The guy, Frank, walked over to them and smiled at Gerard. He had long, dark brown hair and was wearing an old, denim vest that was covered in patches and buttons of various punk bands. He held out his hand for Gerard to shake and he took it, trying hard to not be too obvious about his attraction to Frank.

“Hey, I'm Frank. Gerard, right? Toro was raving about you last week.” When Frank talked, Gerard's eyes were drawn to his mouth, which made him realize Frank had a lip ring in.

Gerard was definitely fucked.

Gerard realized he wasn't saying anything, and he mentally slapped himself. The cleared his throat and said, “Oh, uh, yeah. I'm Gerard.”

Ray grinned and patted them both on the shoulder, “Well, I have to go talk to Dallon about something, I'll talk to you two later.” 

Ray walked away, leaving Frank and Gerard alone together. Gerrad shifted uncomfortable, trying not to stare at Frank too hard then, stuttered out, “So, uh, Frank, how do you... like this youth group so far?”

Frank shrugged, “I don't know, the people seem pretty cool and stuff. I haven't really been here long enough to make a definite opinion yet, though.”

“Ah yeah, that makes sense.” Gerard nervously looked around the room, looking anywhere but Frank. And noticed Pete and Mikey laughing together on a couch. He sighed in relief and made a mental note to ask Mikey what Pete said to him later.

Frank followed Gerard's gaze and asked, “Are those friends of yours?”

Gerard snapped his thoughts back to Frank, then replied, “Oh, yeah. That's my brother, Mikey, and the other one is Pete. Pete's pretty cool, he can get a little weird sometimes, though.”

“Ah, cool. So do you like, know everyone in this youth group?”

Gerard nodded, “Yeah. I mean, I've been at this church for basically my whole life, so I practically grew up with a lot of these people. Like, Ray has been my best friend since we were toddlers. Same with Pete, except he's closer to Mikey then to me. Also, to some extent Tyler and Josh, but I'm not as close to them.”

“Which one's are Tyler and Josh?” Frank asked.

“The blue haired kid is Josh, and the guy who's always with him is Tyler.”

“Oh! Tyler is the guy who looked at me funny when I said this, well, last week, was the first time I had ever gone to church!”

Gerard laughed and shook his head, “Yeah, that sounds like Tyler. He can be kind of annoying sometimes, but you get used to it. Well, mostly.”

“That's kind of what I gathered from him. You should have seen his reaction to my vest. Absolutely hilarious.”

Gerard tilted his head in confusion, “What's wrong with your vest?”

Frank laughed and said, “See for yourself.” Then he turned around to show Gerard the back of his vest. 

The back of Frank's vest was painted completely rainbow, and at the top in large, black letters it said 'pride.'”

Of fucking course the new, cool punk kid was openly gay.

Gerard was going to cry.

He was so fucked.

Frank turned back around and grinned at Gerard, “Cool, right?”

“I- uh, yeah. That's- that's super cool.” Gerard stuttered out.

“What? You don't care that I'm gay too, right?” Frank asked, looking slightly bummed.

Gerrad quickly shook his head, “No! No, of course I don't care! I just- it's kind of really cool that you're brave enough to wear it in a church. I would never be able to-” He closed his mouth before he could finish the sentence, but Frank's grin was growing and Gerard started to blush.

“I, uhm, I mean- fuck, yeah uh, nothing.”

Frank raised an eyebrow and laughed, “Yeah, sure it's nothing.”

Gerard blushed harder and looked at the ground in embarrassment. Frank patted his shoulder and said, “Don't worry, I won't tell anyone.”

Gerard looked back at Frank and smiled slightly, “Thanks. I'm not even uh, gay. I'm actually pan. Sexual. I'm pansexual.”

Frank nodded and grinned, “Yeah, I know what pan means. But, good to know. Y'know, I think Ray was right. We will make good friends, Gerard.”

Gerard smiled at him, “Yeah, I think we will too.”

\--------

When they got back from church, Gerard dragged Mikey into his room. They sat on Gerard's bed and he grinned at Mikey excitedly. Mikey rolled his eyes and said, “God, what do you want to tell me? Just spit it out already! You look like a hyper puppy.”

“No, you first.”

“What do you mean me first?” Mikey asked, looking baffled.

Gerard slapped him on the arm, “What did Pete say to you, obviously!”

Mikey shrugged, “He just said that he didn't care that I was bi, and that the only reason he was acting weird last week was because I'm one of his best friends. It just kind of shocked him that I had a crush on him.”

“Okay, that's good. So, things are back to normal with you two?”

Mikey nodded, “Yeah, basically. I mean, it might be a little weird at first, but we're basically back to normal. Now, what did you want to tell me?”

Gerard grinned, “Okay, so, you know that new kid? Frank?”

“Oh, you mean the guy with the pride vest?”

“Yeah, that one. So like, what do you think about him?”

Mikey raised an eyebrow, “Why are you asking me this?”

“Y'know, I'm curious.”

“No, it's definitely more then that.” Mikey started to grin, “You like him, don't you? Or, you at least think he's hot.”

Gerard fell back on the bed and grinned at Mikey, “He is really hot.”

Mikey started laughing and laid down beside Gerard, “I fucking knew it. He seems like your type, all punk and shit. Plus, he's openly gay, which is fucking awesome for you. I'm still stuck pining after a straight guy.”

Gerard patted Mikey lovingly on the face, “It's okay, dude. At least Pete doesn't give a fuck.”

Mikey shoved Gerard's hand away, “Yeah, that's the problem. He won't give me any fucks. As in, he won't fuck me. Because he is straight.”

Gerard laughed and started poking Mikey's face, “Poor, poor Mikey Way. He'll live his life with absolutely no sex because his one true love is too busy looking at girls. Such a shame.”

Mikey slapped at Gerard's hand, “Oh, shut up, you ass.”

Gerard grinned, then rested his hands on his stomach and mumbled, “Also, I kind of told Frank I was pan.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yeah, it just kind of slipped out.”

“Oh, that's cool. Does he know I'm bi?”

Gerard shrugged, “Not sure, he didn't mention it.”

“Oh, alright.”

Gerard turned onto his side and looked at Mikey, “By the way, are you okay? Ray told me that Tyler told like, everyone that you're bi.” He said, then added, “Oh, also Ray said that he doesn't care that you're bi.”

Mikey started drumming his fingers on his belly and laughed softly, “I kind of figured Ray wouldn't care, he didn't seem like the type to care. But, uh, yeah, I'm okay. Most people didn't mention it, either because they didn't know or didn't care. Josh said he didn't care, but was still acting kind of weird around me. Also, Hayley asked me how sex works with two guys. That was awkward.”

Gerard started to laugh, “Oh my God, what did you say?”

“I just said that she probably didn't want to know and she left me alone after that. It's just awkward talking about sex if sex isn't a thing that's like... happening at that moment, ya know? Even then it's more like 'do you have a condom' or 'are you ready' and shit.”

“Mikey, you have never been in that situation and we both know it.”

Mikey flipped him off and rolled his eyes, “Oh, shut up. You know what I'm saying.”

Gerard started giggling, “Yeah, I know. Anyway, I'm tired, so either leave or let me spoon with you.”

Mikey sat up and patted Gerard on the face, “You have fun with that, but I'm gonna go. Sweet dreams.”

“Yeah, I will.”


	4. Romans 1:27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey put his phone down and covered his face with his arm, still grinning.
> 
> Pete had invited him over.
> 
> He hadn't done that since Mikey came out.
> 
> Maybe he really didn't care that Mikey liked him.

The next couple weeks went by quickly. People stopped asking Mikey awkward questions, and Pete was acting basically normal around him. He still seemed slightly... off whenever he was around Mikey, not making eye contact for too long and flinching away slightly if Mikey got too close.

It hurt, but Mikey understood. Pete insisted that he didn't care that Mikey was bi, didn't care that he was basically in love with Pete, but the signs were there. Even if Pete didn't actively care, there was still a part of his subconscious that was uncomfortable with Mikey.

At least Frank seemed cool. He was ridiculously open about his sexuality, to the point where it took only two weeks of him coming to youth group for him to get the reputation of “that gay punk kid.” Dallon had even asked him not to wear his 'pride' vest again to youth group, which Frank responded to by coming to youth group the next week wearing the most flamboyantly gay outfit he could without wearing any rainbows.

Gerard had been spending most of his free time texting Frank. He was falling head over heels for Frank, and Mikey couldn't help feeling jealous. Why was the guy Gerard liked openly gay, while the guy Mikey liked was straight and possibly slightly homophobic? It wasn't fair.

Thanksgiving passed, and Mikey was starting to get used to Pete's odd behavior. Mikey and Gerard had started putting up Christmas decorations around the house, and Mikey had tried shoving down any bad feelings and thoughts to get into the Christmas spirit. He even hung Christmas lights up around his room, giving his room a red and green glow whenever he turned off the lights.

One Thursday night, Mikey was laying in bed listening to music. His phone vibrated and he picked it up, seeing that he had a text from Pete.

_hey mikes do u wanna stay over at my house tmrw_

Mikey grinned at his phone and quickly replied.

_yeah sure. what time do u want me over_

_idk like 7 maybe? Is that good 4 u?_

_yeah thats good_

_okay cool! see u then mikeyway_

Mikey put his phone down and covered his face with his arm, still grinning.

Pete had invited him over.

He hadn't done that since Mikey came out.

Maybe he really didn't care that Mikey liked him.

Mikey fell asleep that night feeling happy and nervous.

\--------

Mikey grew more nervous as Friday went on. He was fidgeting constantly and kept grinning to himself, and eventually Gerard asked him about it.

“Mikey, what's up with you? You're totally like, freaking out or something. It's weird.”

Mikey chewed at his bottom lip and sighed, “I'm staying over with Pete tonight.”

“So? You've stayed with him like a thousand times before.”

“Yeah, but this is the first time we've hung out outside of church since he found out I liked him!”

Gerard's eyes widened in understanding, “Oh, I get it! You thought things would always be weird between the two of you, but this just shows that he's trying to make it not weird, right?”

Mikey nodded and rubbed the back of his neck, “Yeah, exactly.”

“Okay... okay! So this is a good sort of nervous, yeah? More like butterflies instead of crippling anxiety.”

Mikey laughed, “Yeah, I guess it's something like butterflies. I just- I just want things to be normal between us, you know? But I'm also scared that I'll try too hard to make things normal and just end up making things worse.”

Gerard squeezed Mikey's shoulder softly, “Don't worry, it will be fine. Now, lets pick out what you're going to wear.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “This isn't a date, Gerard. It doesn't matter what I wear.”

“But we still want you looking hot, Mikey. We want to make it so Pete won't be able to keep his hands off you!”

“Again, not a date. But thanks anyway.”

“You're no fun.” Gerard huffed.

Mikey laughed again, “Don't care. I'm just gonna wear the usual clothes that I wear around Pete.”

“So, skin tight pants and a band t-shirt?”

“Exactly.”

“So lame.”

\--------

Mikey waved at Gerard as as he drove out of Pete's driveway. It was a little before 7 and Mikey was almost tempted to run after Gerard and ask him to take him away. Not like Gerard would go for it, he'd tell Mikey to stop being an idiot and just stay with Pete.

He shouldn't be so nervous, it was just Pete.

Mikey knocked on the door and waited. He heard dogs barking from inside and smiled to himself. It was dumb to be so nervous, like Gerard had said, he had been to Pete's house a thousand times before. It was practically his second home.

Footsteps approached the door and Mikey froze, all his anxieties coming back to him as quickly as they had left. The door opened and there stood Pete, wearing tight, black skinny jeans and a baggy gray hoodie. He grinned at Mikey and gestured for him to come inside.

“Hey, Mikey! I was wondering when you would finally show your face.”

Mikey laughed as he followed Pete inside, “You're making it seem like I'm late or something.”

“Don't you know that when I say 'come over tomorrow at 7' I actually mean 'come over now I'm lonely and miss your face.'”

Mikey blushed slightly and shoved Pete playfully, “Maybe you should just say what you mean, asshole.”

Pete grinned, “Now, how is that any fun? Gotta keep you guessing, Mikeyway. Gotta keep you on your toes, never knowing what I'm gonna do or mean.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “You're the worst.”

“And yet you're still friends with me. Really shows what sort of person you are. Now come on, we're going to the basement tonight.” Pete grabbed Mikey's hand and pulled him towards the basement.

Mikey noticed that the house was oddly quiet, so he asked, “Where are your parents?”

“Home group, obviously. Don't your parents go to the same one as mine?”

“Oh, yeah, they do. I just forgot for a second because Gee dropped me off and uh, yeah.”

Pete raised an eyebrow at Mikey, “And what?”

Mikey looked down and blushed crimson, then babbled out, “Okay, to be honest, I've been really nervous tonight because this is the first time you asked me to hang out outside of church since I came out and before I was kind of afraid that you were uncomfortable around me and-”

Pete put his hand over Mikey's mouth, effectively shutting him up. He looked him in the eye and said, “Stop talking. Did you really think I was uncomfortable with you? Mikey, I told you I didn't care! Didn't you believe me?”

Mikey moved Pete's hand from his mouth and shrugged, looking at the ground, “I just- you just seemed, I don't know, weird around me? Like you wanted to ignore the fact that I was bi and- and yeah, but you just kept thinking about it and it was turning you off hanging out with me.”

“Mikey, listen, stop looking away from me.”

Mikey slowly looked back at Pete, and Pete put his hands on Mikey's shoulders and said, “Listen, when I said I didn't care, I meant it. Nothing you could do could make me stop hanging out with you. And yes, that does include murder. If you ever ask me to help you hide a body, you bet your sweet ass I'm going to help you hide that body. You're stuck with me forever, Way. Got it?”

Mikey nodded and hugged Pete, “Yeah, got it.”

They stood there hugging for a few minutes, then Pete laughed softly and pulled away, “So, glad we have that covered. Now, are you ready to watch some shitty horror movies that you are definitely not allowed to watch and would probably make your parents kill me if they found out I was showing you them?”

Mikey grinned, “Only if you make popcorn.”

\--------

Pete and Mikey sat together on a couch in the basement, a bowl of popcorn on Pete's lap and a shitty horror movie playing. Mikey hadn't felt this relaxed in a while, having been too stressed over this situation with Pete ever since it started to feel completely fine. But now everything had been cleared up, so the awkwardness and flinching away was gone and now it was just Pete sitting with Mikey on a couch watching a movie.

It took Mikey a little while to notice exactly _how_ close Pete was sitting to him. Their legs were pressed together and Pete had his arm wrapped around Mikey's shoulder. Now, Mikey didn't want to read too much into it, but he couldn't stop his brain once he noticed something like this. Pete had always been a handsy guy, always getting into Mikey's personal space, but this seemed... different. More personal, and Mikey couldn't help leaning into the touch as Pete stroked the back of his hair.

Mikey had almost completely stopped paying attention to the movie, too distracted by the way Pete was petting his hair. He still wasn't looking at Pete, but he could tell Pete was looking at him. He was forgetting how to breathe properly, and used all his will power to not look at Pete, even when he felt Pete start to lean even closer to him. He was scared of what might happen, what might change, if he did turn his head.

“Mikey.” Pete's voice was quiet and Mikey could feel his breath on his cheek.

Mikey slowly turned his head and Pete was barely an inch away from him, eyes looking at Mikey's lips. He closed the gap between them, kissing Mikey softly. Mikey's heart seemed to stop working for a moment, and all he could feel and think about was Pete's lips pressed against his.

Once he was able to think clearly, Mikey pulled away, confused and freaking out about what just happened. Pete chewed his lip nervously and mumbled, “I uh, sorry. I just thought that- yeah, but I um, sorry.”

Mikey laughed softly, “Pete, stop apologizing. I really, _really_ don't care that you kissed me. I'm just... confused. I thought you were straight.”

Pete laughed and ran a hand through his hair, “Yeah, I thought I was too. But then you said you liked me and, I don't know... it got me thinking. I uh, thought about it a lot actually, and after a lot of thinking I realized that I was _definitely_ not straight. I went to Patrick about all this and he was like 'okay yeah duh you're not straight.' Apparently he realized it a lot quicker then I did, but didn't say anything because he didn't want to accidentally push a sexuality onto me or something.”

Mikey grinned, “That sounds like Patrick, all right.”

“I know right? He's such a great guy. But, anyway, I wasn't done talking. So, during this talk with Patrick you came up, obviously. Patrick asked me if I felt the same about you and... and I wasn't sure at the time, you know? So I told him that and then yeah that was basically then end of our conversation. But later that night, I uh, started thinking about you. Thinking about you a _lot_. And uh, not exactly in the most... platonic ways. After that is when I realized that I definitely needed to kiss you.”

Mikey raised an eyebrow, “Not exactly platonic?”

Pete blushed and buried his face in Mikey's neck, “I had a sex dream about you.”

Mikey laughed, “Really? Was it hot?”

Pete nodded, but kept his face hidden in Mikey's neck, “It was really hot. I uh... jacked off to it later. In the shower.”

Mikey blushed, “Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

“That's uhm- yeah, that's something.” Mikey stuttered out.

Pete looked back up at Mikey, “Is it weird that I told you that?”

“No, it's not... it's not weird. I uh, I also have jacked off to the thought of you...” Mikey mumbled the last part, hoping Pete wouldn't catch it.

But, of course Pete caught it. He grinned widely at Mikey and asked, “Oh really? What were you thinking about exactly?”

Mikey turned crimson and looked away from Pete, “It doesn't matter.”

“Aw, you're embarrassed! That's fine, I can just tell you about the sex dream I had about you.” Pete said happily.

Mikey looked back at Pete, “Or, you could just shut up and kiss me again.”

Pete laughed, “Sounds like a good plan.”

Pete leaned in and kissed Mikey again, this time with less hesitation. The movie was long since forgotten, Mikey and Pete too distracted by each other to watch the movie. Pete rested his hands on Mikey's waist and tried to get closer. He pulled away and made a small frustrated noise, then moved to straddle Mikey. He was able to kiss Mikey again, when he pulled away and grinned, “Hey, I told you I'd be sitting here again in the future.”

Mikey leaned his head back and laughed, “Oh my God.”

Pete grinned, then licked a stripe up Mikey's neck. Mikey froze and let out a small gasp, making Pete grin wider and kiss softly up his neck and along his jawline. Mikey closed his eyes and tilted his head back more, encouraging Pete to continue. He bit down softly just under Mikey's jaw, and Mikey had to bite down on his bottom lip to hold back a moan.

Pete pulled away after a little bit and laughed, “Have I ever told you that I'm super jealous of your jawline?”

Mikey opened his eyes and laughed, “What?”

“Your jawline! It's fantastic! Like, it's so fucking sharp and defined. I've thought about it a lot.”

“You've thought about my jawline a lot and yet you only just realized that you're attracted to guys?”

“What can I say? I am not a smart man.” Pete said with a grin, then leaned in to kiss Mikey again.

They kissed for a while, softly at first but getting more heated as they got braver. Mikey tugged at Pete's hoodie and Pete pulled away for a moment to take if off. Pete wasn't wearing anything underneath it, not surprisingly. Mikey bit his lip as he let his eyes take in Pete. It wasn't the first time he had seen him shirtless, obviously, but it was the first time in this sort of situation. The sort of situation where it wouldn't be weird for him to touch Pete, which is exactly what he did.

Mikey ran his hand down Pete's chest, and Pete laughed softly, “Like what you see?”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “Maybe. But it's not like this is the first time I've seen you shirtless. It's just... you know. The first time I could _touch_.”

Pete grinned widely, “But you've wanted to touch before?”

Mikey blushed, “I think you know the answer to that.”

Pete rested his hands on Mikey's chest, “You know, I think now would be the perfect time for me to see you shirtless, since I haven't before. It's slightly unfair that I am sitting here without my shirt with you touching me all over- which, by the way, I am enjoying so do not stop- while you still have all your clothes on! It is completely lopsided.”

Mikey chewed his bottom lip nervously, then looked away from Pete and pulled his shirt off. Pete placed his hands on Mikey's chest again and said, “You don't have to be nervous.”

“I'm not nervous.” Mikey mumbled.

Pete laughed softly and turned Mikey's head so they were looking at each other again. He kissed Mikey softly, then asked, “Then why did you look away from me?”

Mikey looked down and shrugged, “I'm just- I'm just not really used to people seeing me shirtless, considering I basically only take off my shirt when I'm showering or if I'm changing. I just... I just get kinda self-conscious when I take off my shirt.”

Pete tilted Mikey's head back up and grinned, “Well, I think you look great. Ten out of ten.”

Mikey laughed and Pete kissed him again, harder this time. Their hands were everywhere, touching all over each others chests. Pete pushed closer to Mikey and pulled at his hair. He ran his hand down Mikey's chest, stopping right before he got to his pants. He pulled away slightly, breathing heavily, and laughed, “Y'know, this feels kind of weird for me, since I'm used to doing this sort of thing with girls.”

Mikey laughed, “Weird in a good way, I hope.”

Pete grinned, “Yeah, in a good way. It's just kind of new territory for me, obviously. What about you? Have you kissed any other boys?”

Mikey blushed and looked at the ceiling, “I uh... I haven't actually kissed anyone. Until now.”

Pete's grin widened, “Are you telling me that I'm your first kiss, Mikeyway?”

“Uhm... yeah?”

“That is fantastic! I am very flattered, Mikey. You didn't have to save your first kiss for me.”

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes, slapping Pete lightly on his chest, “I didn't save my first kiss for you! It just happened like this, obviously. You're the worst.”

“Okay, you keep saying that, but I'm starting to think that you don't mean it. I might have to test this theory out.”

Mikey raised his eyebrow, “How are you going to do that?”

Pete chuckled, “Like this.” Then kissed Mikey deeply. He tugged on Mikey's bottom lip with his teeth and Mikey gasped lightly. Pete smirked, “That doesn't sound like the sort of sound someone who thinks I'm the worst would make.”

“Fuck you.”

“I think that's your job.”

Mikey's face turned crimson, “Maybe later.”

Pete chuckled, “Sounds good.”

Mikey rolled his eyes and kissed Pete again. He ran his hands up and down Pete's back, then tugged his hair slightly. Pete gasped into Mikey's mouth, then mumbled, “You know, I would have never guessed that you haven't kissed anyone before. You are a very good kisser.”

Mikey grinned, “Really?”

“Yeah, really, you nerd.” Pete laughed, then leaned in to kiss him again.

\--------

The next morning, Mikey woke up with Pete lying across his chest. When Pete's parents had gotten home last night, they decided it was smarter to move up to Pete's room. It would be a lot worse for Mikey, and Pete, if he was caught _making out_ with a guy, instead of just admitting that he liked one.

Mikey smiled down at Pete, trying to get any worries of being caught out of his mind. He started to stroke Pete's hair, softly so he wouldn't wake him up. It's not like it was the first time he had slept in the same bed as Pete- hell, it wasn't even the first time he had _cuddled_ with Pete- but it was different, it meant more.

Pete stirred slightly and looked up, smiling back at Mikey.

“'Morning.” Mikey muttered, still stroking Pete's hair.

Pete leaned up and kissed Mikey softly, “'Morning, babe.”

Mikey felt butterflies in his stomach and smiled wide. Pete grinned back and moved so he was completely on top of him. Mikey cupped Pete's cheek in his hand and just lay there, appreciating just having Pete like this, having him look down at Mikey like he was beautiful and he couldn't believe it. Mikey pulled him down for a kiss and Pete laughed softly, before kissing back

They stayed like that for a while, kissing lazily with the blankets tangled around them. Mikey ran his hands up and down Pete's back, through his hair, down his chest. He could stay like this for hours, feeling like they were in a bubble outside of time.

Of course, they weren't actually in a bubble outside of time, so after a little while they were interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Boys, are you awake?” Pete's mom called through the door, “Mikey has to get ready to leave soon.”

They quickly pulled away from each other, and Pete tried to get off the bed only to get tangled in the blankets and falling over. Mikey started laughing and Pete glared at him and flipped him off.

“You guys alright in there?”

“Yeah, yeah we're alright. I just uh, fell off the bed.” Pete yelled back, making Mikey laugh harder.

“Okay... Well, I'm making pancakes, they'll probably be done in about ten minutes, will you two be dressed by then?”

“Yeah, we will be. Thanks, mom.”

Pete stood up and brushed himself off, while Mikey still sat on the bed. Pete grabbed Mikey's shirt from the ground and threw it at his chest. Mikey put it on, then reached out and grabbed Pete's arm, yanking him back on to the bed. Pete yelped as he fell on the bed, and Mikey grinned at him.

“What the fu-” Mikey stopped Pete's protest by kissing him. Pete laughed and ran his fingers through Mikey's hair, and Mikey rolled them over so he was straddling Pete. He rested his hands on Pete's chest and Pete said, “We probably should get ready...”

“Just a few more minutes.” Mikey mumbled, then kissed Pete again. He ran his hand down Pete's chest and Pete shivered. A few minutes passed, and Pete was pushing Mikey away. Mikey sighed and got off him. Pete leaned his head on Mikey's shoulder and said, “I'd want to continue- trust me, I really would- but I don't want my mom to catch us.”

Mikey leaned his head on Pete's, “Yeah, I know. We can just continue another time.”

Pete turned his head and buried his face in Mikey's neck, “Yeah, another time.”

Mikey started stroking Pete's hair and asked, “Wait, we're dating now, right?”

Pete laughed, “Duh. Unless you don't want to...”

“What? Of course I do! We've been making out constantly for the past like, ten hours, dude.”

“That's not true! We slept for a while too.”

“Yeah, we fell asleep together while we were making out.”

Pete grinned, “Okay, okay, I get it. So, pancakes?”

Mikey kissed him one last time, “Sounds perfect.”

\--------

Breakfast was slightly awkward. Mikey wasn't sure how to Pete's parents after he had just been _making out with their son_. But, he was able to make awkward small talk for the fifteen or so minutes of breakfast, and then Pete pulled him into the bathroom for a goodbye kiss before his mom came to pick him up.

The drive home was quiet, Mikey too busy smiling to himself and thinking about what happened to say anything. Of all the possibilities that ran through his mind before he went to Pete's house last night, this was one that he thought couldn't _possibly_ happen.

When he got home, Mikey immediately ran to Gerard's room and knocked on the door loudly, trying to wake him up. He heard a groan from within, so he continued knocking and yelled, “Gerard, wake up, you lazy ass! I have to tell you something!”

“No, go away! It's like, 10 AM.”

“It's 11, asshole. Get the fuck up!”

“No, it's still in the AM! Wake me up in a few hours.”

“I'm not letting you sleep 'til 2, dude. Just get up, I have something important to tell you. If you don't open this door I'll just continue being loud until you do.”

Gerard groaned, “Ugh, fine. One sec.”

Mikey heard a loud thump from inside and waited for Gerard to open the door. The door swung open to show Gerard standing there, looking half asleep and glaring at Mikey.

“What do you want?” Gerard mumbled, rubbing at his eyes.

Mikey grinned, “Glad you asked.”

He pushed past Gerard and sat down on his bed. Gerard closed the door and followed, yawning as he laid back down, not even hiding the fact that he was trying to go back to sleep.

“Okay, so, what's so important that you had to wake me up?”

Mikey's grin grew wider and he replied, “Pete kissed me.”

Gerard's eyes shot open and he sat up, “He _what_?”

“He kissed me! Pete kissed me!” Mikey feel back and covered his face with his arm.

“Wait, seriously? Tell me everything that happened, _right now_.”

“So, we were watching a movie, some shitty horror movie; I can't even remember the name.”

“Okay, I don't care. Get to the kissing part.”

“Okay, okay. So we were sitting on the couch in his basement, right? And we were sitting _really_ close together, like his arm was around my shoulders and everything, then he just, you know, kissed me. We're totally dating now.”

“Holy shit, that's awesome, Mikey! Kinda pissed you had your first kiss before me, though.”

Mikey laughed and uncovered his face, “First boyfriend, too.”

Gerard rolled his eyes, “I know, I know. Don't rub it in.”

Mikey grinned up at him, “You know, if things go as you plan with Frank, it might not be much longer for you.”

Gerard blushed, “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

Mikey laughed, “Oh, shut up. You know you fucking like Frank, and you can't say otherwise because you already told me.”

“Okay, whatever. Just because I like him doesn't mean he likes me.”

“Okay, that's true. You are pretty terrible, so I could definitely see him not liking you back.”

Gerard slapped Mikey on the stomach, “Fuck you, I'm fucking amazing.”

Mikey laughed, “Yeah, yeah. If you insist. Just tell me if anything happens between you two, alright? It's only fair. I want you to tell me the second you two kiss or whatever.”

“Will do.” Gerard laughed.

 


	5. Song of Solomon 3:1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “This song is kinda gay.” Frank said, interrupting Gerard's singing.
> 
> “What? No it isn't! It's about a guy who falls in love with a Communist girl.”
> 
> “Uhm, 'I want to love you, and I'm not afraid. I want to love you, and I'm not ashamed.' Sound pretty gay to me.” Frank laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> brief implications of self harm and trans slurs in this chapter (nothing too extreme, just being careful)

Ever since Frank started coming to church, Gerard was much more excited to go. The two of them had bonded quickly, and Gerard couldn't wait to see him each Sunday. It might not have been the most pure reason to want to go to church, but he didn't care. He hadn't considered himself a Christian for years now, so wanting to go to church so he could talk to a hot, punk kid didn't really seem too bad.

They also would talk all through the week. Frank would tell Gerard about weird things his friends did during the week and Gerard would tell Frank about anything remotely interesting that happened, like finding silverware in the dirt outside of his house.

Gerard did not have an interesting life.

That week at youth group, Gerard smirked to himself when he saw Pete and Mikey sitting on each other on the couches. It wasn't uncommon for the two to do stuff like that, so no one batted an eye. But Gerard knew. Oh boy, did Gerard know.

Frank grinned at Gerard when he saw him, then ran over and hugged him tightly.

“Gerard! Good seeing you, man!” Frank said when Gerard finally broke the hug.

Gerard laughed, “You're acting like we haven't been talking constantly during the week. Like, I texted you five minutes ago.”

“Yes, but we haven't _seen_ each other. Which reminds me, we should hang out sometime! Like, outside of church.”

Gerard smiled widely, “Yeah! That'd be great! You can come over to my house sometime.” He said, then quickly added, “I mean, if you want.”

“Yeah, sounds great! Are you free next Friday?”

Gerard snorted, “I'm always free.”

Frank laughed, “Oh yeah, that's right. So, next Friday then?"

“Yeah, that should be fine. I'll have to ask my mom first, but she'll probably be fine with it. She likes having people over.”

“Okay, cool! Just tell me what time and your address and I'll show up.”

“Great! Can't wait.” Gerard grinned.

Frank grinned back, “Yeah, me neither.”

They walked over to the couches and found Ray. He was laying down on one of them and Gerard swatted at his feet until Ray moved them, sitting up. Gerard sat down in the middle of the couch, Frank and Ray on either side. Ray blew a strand of hair from his face and said, “It's cool seeing you two talk so much, I knew you guys would like each other.”

“Yeah, actual match-maker Ray Toro.” Frank laughed.

Ray grinned, “I should make a business out of this.”

“Sounds like a great idea.” Gerard said, holding back giggles. He heard Pete and Mikey whispering behind him, so he turned around and gave Mikey a curious look. Mikey shrugged, but Gerard could tell that he was blushing, so he gave Pete a 'hey can I talk to you' look.

Pete gave Mikey a wide-eye, almost scared look, Gerard noted happily, then stood up and walked to an empty corner of the room with Gerard. Gerard put his hand on Pete's shoulder and said, “Now, I know I probably don't have to say this, considering we've basically known each other our whole lives, but-”

“Oh my God, are you gonna give me a talk? Gerard, you do _not_ need to give me a talk.”

“You're probably not, but I'm gonna say it any away 'cause he's my younger brother and therefore I need to protect him. Anyway! What was I saying? Oh yeah, as you know, Mikey tells me everything. Which means I would know immediately if you did anything to hurt him. Which means you wouldn't have long to live after you did said thing.”

Pete laughed, “Gerard, you are not going to kill me.”

Gerard smiled, “No, of course I'm not going to kill you, silly.”

Pete seemed to let out a small sigh of relief.

“I shouldn't have any reason to kill you. But, if you do do anything, it is completely out of my control whether or not I kill you. Sorry! That's just how this whole thing works.”

“Gerard, you have full control over whether or not you kill me.”

“Sorry, no I don't.”

Pete's eyes widened, “You wouldn't actually kill me, right?”

“Well, the only way we would find out is if you hurt Mikey, which won't happen, right? So you don't need to worry about it!” Gerard grinned.

“Yeah, right. Definitely won't hurt Mikey. Also, I take it Mikey told you we became a thing the minute he got home from my place, right?”

Gerard laughed, “Well, obviously. He woke me up and everything. I was having a pleasant dream and was not in the right state of mind to endure my little brother telling me every detail of his first kiss slash all night make out session.”

“He... he told you every detail?” Pete asked, face turning crimson.

“Yep, every detail. Are you even surprised?”

“Uh... no. Not surprised at all, actually.”

Gerard patted him on the shoulder again and said, “Okay, I think I'm done now. Just, one more thing: if you ever have sex-”

“Please don't.”

“-Wear a condom and use a lot of lube.”

“Oh my God.”

Gerard grinned, “Just want you to be safe.”

“I hate you so much right now.” Pete groaned.

“Also, take it slow. Don't rush into anything if you don't think you're ready. Also-”

“OH MY GOD- Okay, you know what, I'm done talking to you. Bye.” Pete quickly walked away from Gerard, head down to hide the fact that his face was bright red. Gerard grinned wider and yelled, “Wait! I'm not done with you yet!”

Mikey gave Gerard a questioning look, then turned back to Pete and seemed to ask him what Gerard was talking to him about. Pete's face grew redder, and Gerard felt triumphant. He felt it was the older siblings job to make anyone who dated Mikey uncomfortable. At least, he just felt it was his job to make Pete uncomfortable. Maybe he just really wanted to make Pete feel uncomfortable. That was probably it.

Gerard walked back over to Ray and Frank, and Ray asked, through laughter, “What was that all about?”

Gerard waved him off, “Just big brother stuff. Where's Dallon? I feel like we should have started by now.”

Ray shrugged, “Who knows. He's like... always late. When was the last time he was on time?”

Gerard giggled, “Okay, that's true. Remember back in junior high when he would sometimes come in like, 40 minutes late? Man, we all loved it when that happened.”

Ray grinned, “Things got crazy when you put a bunch of 12 year old's in a room together with no adult supervision.”

“Crazy, meaning all the boys would dare each other to kiss one of the girls, followed by lots of laughing and screaming.”

"-And, of course, none of us ever kissed anyone, anyway.”

“No, of course not. I'm pretty sure most of the guys in this youth group _still_ are too afraid to kiss anyone.”

Ray laughed, “Okay, true, we're all lame. Except for me, I've kissed people before.”

“That's because you're a cool dude, Ray.”

Ray grinned, “Fucking true. But you aren't lame and you still haven't kissed anyone, right?”

Gerard blushed and quickly glanced at Frank, “Oh, uh, yeah. I haven't kissed anyone, yet. But that's mainly because I haven't had the opportunity.”

Ray patted him on the shoulder sympathetically, “I'm sure you'll have someone to kiss eventually. You _are_ a very beautiful man, after all.”

Gerard laughed, “Thanks, that means a lot.”

Right then, Dallon jogged up to the front of the room and said, “Sorry, sorry. I was talking to Jon about something. But I'm here now, so settle down.”

Ray wiggled his eyebrows at Gerard, then raised his hand. Dallon looked at Ray and asked, “Do you need something, Ray?”

Ray winked at Gerard, then asked, “I was wondering, would you ever make out with Gerard?”

Gerard groaned and buried his face in his hands. Dallon just sighed and rubbed at the bridge of his nose, “Why- why would you ask that?”

“I'm just curious! So, would you?”

“No, no I would not. First of all, he is way too young. Second of all, I'm married. So, no, I would not make out with Gerard.”

“Okay, well, what if you were the same age as him and not married?”

“Still no. He's a great kid, I just wouldn't want to kiss him.”

“Lame! I'd totally kiss Gerard. Take his pure, un-kissed lips and violate them with mine.”

Gerard laughed, “I can't tell if that's a good thing or not.”

“Oh trust me, it's a good thing.” Ray winked again, then licked his lips dramatically, making Gerard laugh harder.

“Okay, okay, settle down. I'm going to read the Bible now. The _Bible_. Because we're in a _church_. Actually, first I have some announcements, and then the band will play- okay, you know what I mean. No more talking about kissing boys or winking at each other.”

Ray raised his hand again, “What if Breezy winked at you? Is that allowed or would you punish her?”

“Oh, kinky.” Gerard winked at Dallon.

“Okay! That's enough! Didn't I just say no more winking? You two are ridiculous. If you continue talking, I'll make you two clean up the kitchen every night at winter camp. I'm sure Vicky would be thrilled to make you two do that. Now, speaking of winter camp, next week is the deadline for sign-up, so if you haven't already done that but you want to got, you need to do that soon. And, if money is a problem for you, don't be afraid to talk to any of the leaders about it.”

Gerard leaned closer to Frank and whispered, “Are you going to winter camp?”

“Uh, yeah, I am. My mom signed me up for it 'cause she thought it'd be a good way to get closer to people in the youth group. But, what is it exactly? Like, is it actual camping or...? 'Cause, no offense to you guys, but I don't want to freeze my balls off for some quality bonding time.”

Gerard waved him off, “I'll tell you later, but don't worry, it's not actual camping. It's at this lodge place. But it's really fun, you'll love it.”

Gerard tuned back in to what Dallon was saying, figuring it might be important.

“Okay, girls, the purity conference is on Saturday, so this is your last chance to tell Breezy if you're going.”

This time, Frank leaned closer to Gerard and whispered, “We don't have to go to that, right?”

“Oh, no, we don't. They have huge double standards about this sort of thing, so only girls have to go. It's totally sexist, but there isn't much we can do to change it. You should see the dress code for girls, it's ridiculous.”

“Hey, Gerard, c'mon man. Pay attention.” Dallon said, staring at Gerard.

“Sorry, Dally Wally.” Gerard said seriously.

“Gerard, I swear- Okay, you may have known me since I was just barely out of college, but I am still your leader and deserve _some_ respect.”

Gerard grinned, “What? Don't like being called 'Dally Wally.'”

“I- No, of course I don't. But, Gerard, don't make me take out your baby pictures because I still have them and I _will_ use them.”

Gerard groaned, “ _Seriously_?”

“Yes, seriously. Perks of knowing you since you were a toddler. Now, stop distracting me. Ray, Hayley, Josh, Pete, your turn to come up.”

\--------

Friday came quicker then Gerard was ready for, so he spent the whole day out and staring at himself in the mirror. Mikey had patted him sympathetically on the shoulder, then laughed and totally _abandoned_ him to go talk to Pete what the _fuck_.

Younger brothers _suck_.

Gerard sat on the couch and picked nervously at a hole in his jeans. He really needed more clothes, he only had two pairs of pants and he was pretty sure Ray had started to notice, and just hadn't said anything because he's such a great guy. Fuck, Gerard could never get over how great Ray was. He could just kiss that dude, he was so wonderful.

The doorbell rang, and Gerard could feel his heart speed up. He got up and went to open the door, smiling when he saw Frank. He grinned widely and said, “You came!”

“Of course I came! Why wouldn’t I?” Frank said, grinning back at Gerard.

Gerard shrugged, “I don't know... But, uh, you probably don't want to sit on my front porch all day. Come on in.”

Frank laughed, then followed Gerard inside. He looked around, then asked, “Where's Mikey?”

“Oh, I think he's in his room, probably talking to Pete or listening to music. Or he's jacking off. Or all three at the same time.”

Frank laughed harder, “Oh man, it sounds like he's having a fun time.”

Gerard grinned and shook his head, “Yeah, probably.”

Gerard led Frank to his room, then started to panic slightly when he realized he had forgotten to clean his room before Frank came over. He really, really was meaning to, it had just slipped his mind. Damn memory issues. He opened the door and mumbled, “Sorry 'bout the mess.” as they walked in.

“It's fine, my room always looks fucking terrible. I don't even know where half the shit comes from, but somehow it ended up in my room. Never know where to put any of it, so even when I 'clean' my room it still looks fucking messy.”

Gerard laughed and said, “Yeah, me too.” then he noticed a lipstick sitting out on his desk, so he quickly walked over to it and shoved it into his pocket, hoping Frank didn't notice. He might have been an aggressively gay dude, but Gerard still didn't know how he felt about the whole “gender” thing, so he figured it'd be best to keep it quiet. For now, at least. Wait until he knew more about how Frank thought about the subject before saying anything about Gerard's own gender confusion. He turned back to Frank, cleared his throat, trying to not think about the fact that he had a cute boy in his room, and said, “So, uh, yeah. This is my room.”

Frank laughed, “I kinda figured that.”

He sat down on Gerard's bed- oh fuck, now he had a cute boy on his _bed_. He was going to have a breakdown- and Gerard joined him. They sat there awkwardly for a few minutes, neither of them really sure what to do or say. Frank drummed his fingers on his thigh, then asked after a few more moments of awkward silence, “Do you have any music?”

“Oh, I have some CDs on my shelf.”

Frank stood up and walked over to Gerard's book shelf, looking through the CDs that he kept there.

“So, you never did explain to me what winter camp is. I've been sitting here waiting patiently for a week now.”

“Oh! I'm sorry! I just forgot. But, uh, yeah, basically we go up to this lodge in the mountains for a weekend in February and do... stuff. I don't know, it's hard to explain, but I swear it's super fun. We mostly just stay inside and play random games, then of course there's prayer night-”

“Ah fuck, is that where everyone has to like, pray a lot? Cause, no offense, I don't really do that shit. I mean, yeah I go to church, but it's mostly because my mom makes me. I'm not actually a Christian myself, if you haven't realized.”

“Oh, don't worry! They don't like, force you to pray or anything. It's basically a night where a bunch of kids mistake their teenage hormones for the Holy Spirit, and then vow they'll give up porn and maybe keep said vow for a week, but then it never lasts. Until summer camp, of course. Then they're 'begging for forgiveness' and swearing that they'll really give it up this time! Also, there's always crying. Seriously, everyone cries during prayer night. Except for the five or so kids who aren't Christian who just kind of sit in the back awkwardly and trying to ignore the fact that they're surrounded by a bunch of sobbing teenagers.”

“...Okay, so that doesn't sound pleasant. At all. Why the fuck would people want to do that?”

Gerard shrugged, “I don't know, religious people are fucking crazy. But, it's not actually that bad when you're there. Plus, that's only one of the nights. Afterward, everyone goes back to normal. But it always snows a lot when we go up, and there's always that one idiot who jumps into the snow in his underwear. Last year it was Pete and Mikey. They just kinda... ran out, jumped in the snow, screamed like children, then ran back inside. It was kind of hilarious. But, overall it's really chill and-”

“Okay, sorry, I have to interrupt you. Your music taste is so lame! I expected so much more from you, Gerard. I mean, Relient K? _Seriously_?”

“Relient K isn't lame...” Gerard mumbled, then continued, “But, it isn't really my fault. I'm only allowed to listen to Christian music.”

He got up and joined Frank by the shelf, “But, these bands are actually really cool. Like, House of Heroes? Absolutely fantastic. Same with Anberlin and The Classic Crime and-”

“Okay, I'm sure they are all fine and dandy, but back up a sec. You're only allowed to Christian music/ Holy shit, that fucking sucks.”

Gerard shrugged, “It's alright. I mean, it's not as bad as it could be. I once knew a girl who wasn't allowed to listen to _any_ music. Now _that's_ shitty.”

“Holy shit, that is shitty. But still, only being allowed to listen to Christian music fucking sucks. You're missing out on so much good music. How have you been able to deal? Will your parents ground you if you listen to secular music?”

“Usually I just basically get a slap on the wrist if they catch me listening to secular music, but if they think it's becoming a pattern of disobedience they'll ground me. But, I mean, it's not like I only have to listen to worship music or something. It just, you know, has to be Christian. Or, at least the members have to be Christian. Like, Anberlin doesn't- or didn't. They broke up not long ago- consider themselves to be a Christian band, but they were Christians, so that counted.” Gerard picked up on of the albums and looked down at it, “But seriously, House of Heroes is amazing. You need to listen to this album.”

Frank took it from Gerard and looked it over, “The End is Not the End?”

“Yeah! It's great, okay? It's like- like a concept album that's based around war time. Not any specific war, just like... just like old wars. There also seems to be a large theme of forbidden romance on this album.” Gerard grabbed it back from Frank and put it into the CD player that he kept on the top of the shelf. He laid down on his bed and hummed along to the music. Frank joined him on the bed, laying on his side but propping himself up on his elbow.

Gerard started to sing along to the song, trying to ignore the fact that Frank was watching him.

“ _I could be in love if you wore that dress every day, with your hair just so and your eyes of gray. You'd make a beautiful bird on a line, a beautiful bride of Frankenstein, a beautiful drop of iodine. If you were mine, if you were mine, if you were mine_...”

“You have a nice voice.” Frank said, making Gerard blush and mess up the lyrics.

“I- uh, thanks.” He stuttered out.

Frank laughed, “Sorry, I just- yeah. I wanted you to know that I think you have a good voice.”

Gerard smiled at him, “It's fine. You know, people are always saying that, but I don't really see it. I mean, I don't think I have a _terrible_ voice, but I don't see what's so great about it. Ray, on the other hand, has a fucking _fantastic_ voice. He sounds like a goddamn angel.”

“Yeah, that's true. But, that's kinda how I feel. I've had a lot of people tell me my voice is great, but I don't really see it.”

Gerard grinned, “I'm sure your voice is great. You should sing me something.”

Frank turned onto his back and covered his face with his arm, “No! I don't like singing in front of people! It's weird!”

“Please! You just heard me sing!”

“Yeah, but you had something to sing along to! I'm by myself here.”

Gerard rolled his eyes, “Fine, but you need to sing me something eventually.”

“Yeah, yeah. Maybe. I'll think about it.”

“I'll be waiting patiently.” Gerard grinned at him again.

Frank propped himself up on his elbows again and blew a strand of hair from his eyes, “So, you have any other secret talents I should know about?”

“Uh, I like, draw and shit? I don't know, I guess that's it.”

“Really? Can I see something you've drawn?” Frank asked, looking at him like an overexcited puppy and Gerard couldn't say no. Holy shit, he was fucking adorable. How could someone be that cute and hot at the same time? Gerard was simultaneously confused by Frank's appearance, and insanely attracted to him. It was a very strange range of emotions and he just kind of wanted to look at Frank forever.

“Yeah, uhm, sure. Let me just find my sketch pad...” Gerard got off his bed and started looking around his desk for his sketch pad. His room was always such a mess, he could never find anything in the chaos. His mom always got on him about the mess, but he never actually bothered to actually do anything about it.

Gerard finally found his sketch pad and started to flip through it, looking for something good to show Frank. He heard Frank leave the bed and felt him come up to stand right behind him. He turned around to show him one of his drawings- a character he had created who had the ability to make people do what she wanted- but his breath hitched when he realized exactly how close Frank was standing. His throat suddenly went dry and he cleared it loudly, trying to not notice the way Frank licked his lips.

Gerard cleared his throat again and Frank's gaze moved from his lips back up to his eyes. He stepped closer, almost touching Gerard, and said in almost a whisper, “You said you've never been kissed, right? At youth group.”

Gerard nodded dumbly and felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest. Frank's mouth twitched up at the corners and he brushed his hand softly against Gerard's cheek. He started to lean closer, inch by inch, when suddenly there was a loud knock on the door.

Frank's eyes grew wide and he quickly stepped away from Gerard, just before Mikey opened the door and peaked his head in through the doorway.

“Hey, do you guys want pizza? Pete's coming over in a little bit, so I was gonna order pizza for the two of us, but I figured I probably should check to see if you two wanted anything.”

Gerard coughed, then said, “Oh, uh, yeah. Sure.”

“Aright. What kind do you want?”

Gerard shrugged, “I don't really care. What do you want, Frank?”

“Uh, cheese is fine.” Frank replied, looking at the floor awkwardly.

Mikey gave Frank a weird look, then looked back at Gerard and raised an eyebrow, obviously noticing that something was up. Gerard just shrugged, and Mikey seemed to give up for now, saying, “Okay, cool. I'll tell you when it arrives.”

“Okay, thanks Mikey,” Gerard mumbled. Mikey gave him another look, then shrugged and closed the door, leaving Frank and Gerard alone again. Frank coughed and sat back down on Gerard's bed. Gerard was looking down at his sketch pad, trying to fully process what just happened.

Frank almost kissed him, that was obvious.

Oh man, Gerard was going to kick Mikey's ass later for interrupting them.

But, why wasn't Frank trying to kiss him again? Mikey had left, they were completely alone again... Maybe Mikey walking in freaked him out enough that he was too scared to try again. Maybe he just realized that he didn't actually want to kiss Gerard.

Gerard looked up at Frank. He was still sitting on the edge of Gerard's bed, chewing his lip and wringing his hands nervously, not even looking in Gerard's general direction.

Maybe he had just lost all his confidence and will try again some other time.

Gerard slowly put his sketch pad back down and sat down next to Frank. They were sitting close to each other, but not close enough for them to be touching anywhere. Gerard wanted to do... _something_. Anything that might break the awkward tension between them. He settled on tapping his fingers rhythmically on his thigh and singing along to the song again.

“ _I want to touch you, and I'm not afraid. I want to touch you, and I'm not ashamed. I want to tell you that I'm not afraid_ -”

“This song is kinda gay.” Frank said, interrupting Gerard's singing.

“What? No it isn't! It's about a guy who falls in love with a Communist girl.”

“Uhm, 'I want to love you, and I'm not afraid. I want to love you, and I'm not ashamed.' Sound pretty gay to me.” Frank laughed.

“Okay, but they use female pronouns! It's about a chick, dude.”

“So? They're a Christian band, right? They probably would be shunned if they actually came out- no pun intended- and made a gay song. They're obviously using Communism as a metaphor for being gay. Which is actually pretty fucked up, if you think about it."

Gerard rolled his eyes, “It's not gay.”

Frank laughed again, “As a very gay guy, I can tell when something is gay. And this, my friend, is fucking gay. You're just blinded by your Christian upbringing.”

“Oh, don't pull that 'Christian upbringing' shit on me. I'm queer as fuck, thank you very much.”

“Then you should realize that that song is gay as fuck.” Frank grinned.

Gerard shoved him playfully, “Okay, shut up. I guess it is kinda gay, but that doesn't mean they're gay.”

“I never said they were! I'm just saying whoever wrote the song-”

“AJ Babcock.”

“-Okay, AJ Babcock wrote a song about being gay, then altered the lyrics to make it suitable to show to all their homophobic, religious fans.”

Gerard laughed, “You're ridiculous!”

Frank's grin grew wider, “Ridiculous, but totally fucking accurate. I have this band pinned down already.”

Gerard laughed harder, then suddenly remembered but Mikey had said when he came in earlier (came in and totally _ruined_ everything. God.).

“Oh, fuck. Pete's coming over. I hope they aren't fucking.”

Frank raised his eyebrows and Gerard quickly stuttered out, “I mean- fuck. Listen, you can't say anything about that to anyone, okay? They're trying to keep it low key.”

Frank started laughing loudly, “Dude, is there anyone in this youth group who _isn't_ queer?”

“Uhm, I'm pretty sure it's just the four of us. At least, as far as I know. Also, there's a lot of discussion around William's sexuality, but no one is really sure.”

“This is amazing. Of course the youth group I join is gay as fuck. Even one of the _leaders_ is possibly queer. I have like, some sort of accidental radar for this sort of thing.”

“Like a... gaydar?”

“I will hit you.”

Gerard fake pouted, “You're so mean to me.”

“No, just sometimes people deserve to get hit.”

Gerard started laughing again. He still had this weird feeling in his stomach, like he really wanted to kiss Frank, but had such a high level of uncertainty that he definitely was not going to kiss him. At least now he knew Frank wanted to kiss him. Or, at least, he probably wanted to kiss him. Gerard still had this feeling of doubt that Frank didn't actually like him and was just going to kiss him on an impulse; and that's why he didn't try again once Mikey left, he realized what he was doing and remembered that he definitely did not want to kiss Gerard.

Gerard glanced at Frank nervously. Did he even like Gerard at all? Did he only hang out with him because he had nothing better to do? Well, he was the one who initially asked Gerard if he wanted to hang out, but that didn't mean anything. He could have just known he wouldn't have any plans and would be bored so might as well hang out with Gerard. He wanted to ask Frank if he actually liked him, but that might scare him away. Gerard didn't want him gone, but he also felt so frustrated and confused. _Why didn't Frank try to kiss me again?_ The question was floating around in his mind, making him not realize Frank was talking to him until he heard him say, “-And then she- hey, are you even listening to me? I feel like I'm talking to a wall.”

Gerard snapped out of his thoughts and started panicking, “Oh, yeah, sorry. I'm sorry. I just- uh, zoned out for a little bit. Sorry. What were you saying? I'm sorry.”

“Hey, dude, chill. It's alright, it happens. I was just talking about this one time a girl I know- note, she's trans and hasn't really started transitioning yet- punched a guy in the face cause he called her a tranny. It was fucking awesome, she broke his nose and everything.”

Gerard laughed, still a little nervously, but trying to calm down, “That _is_ awesome. I would have done the same if someone called me that. I mean- fuck, I really gotta stop doing that.”

Frank raised an eyebrow, “Are you trans too?”

“Uhm, kind of? More like, uh, trying to figure out what the fuck is happening. It's so unfair, though. Mikey is always like 'I don't really understand the whole 'gender' thing. Like, for me it's so obvious. I've just always known that I was a guy, you know? And obvious I don't care about whatever gender you are, I'm just saying I don't fully understand it.' Like, wow, how unfair is that? I'm sitting here confused about basically _everything_ and he's just sitting there all comfy and shit on Cisgender Hill.”

Frank started laughing, and Gerard gave him an annoyed look, “What?”

“Nothing, nothing. Sorry, it's just... you're so fucking _cute_ , Gerard. Like, holy shit. 'Cisgender Hill'? I'm sorry, this is obviously a serious matter I just- fuck. You are so adorable.”

Gerard blushed, “I am not cute.”

“Yes, yes you are. Jesus Christ- sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to laugh I'm just overwhelmed by how cute you are.”

Gerard scrunched up his nose in annoyance, “Shut up.”

“Oh God, now you just look like a bunny. Stop this. Everything you do is so fucking cute.”

Gerard crossed his arms and glared at Frank, “I do not look like a bunny.”

“Okay, now you look like an angry bunny. I am sorry for angering you, Thumper.”

Gerard shoved Frank off the bed, “You're the worst!”

Frank grinned up at him from the ground, “You still look like an adorable little bunny.”

“I will kill you.”

“A murderous little bunny! How Monty Python of you.”

Gerard grinned, “You know what? I'll take that.”

Frank got back up on the bed and grinned back at Gerard, “Fantastic! But really, is there another name you'd want me to call you? Or different pronouns? I don't want to be a dick.”

Gerard shrugged, “I'm still fine with Gerard and he pronouns. But, but maybe... maybe you could try she pronouns? Or they?”

“Like... an experiment?”

“Yeah, exactly! Like experimenting with different pronouns.”

“Okay... okay. I can do that. Do you just want me to talk to you as if I was describing you to someone else?”

“Yeah, uh, I guess that'd be fine.”

“Okay, uhm, here goes.” Frank cleared his throat a little, then said, “She's really awesome. Has kind of a shitty taste in music, but that isn't really her fault. One of her favorite bands is Relient K, but I will forgive her for that-”

“Okay, I'm gonna have to stop you there. Relient K is fantastic.”

“Maybe I won't be able to forgive you for this...”

Gerard hit him on the shoulder, “Have you even listened to Relient K? And I'm talking about _other_ than Sadie Hawkins Dance. Like, hold on.” He got up and went to his shelf, quickly grabbing and an album and throwing it at Frank.

Frank raised a questioning eyebrow, “Mmhmm?”

“What? It's a great album! Seriously! Take it home with you and listen to it. Like, _really_ listen to it. Listen to the lyrics and the music thoroughly. Then try and say Relient K isn't fantastic.”

Frank rolled his eyes, “Fine, I'll listen to it later.”

Gerard grinned, “Great! After that, I'll let you borrow Five Score and Seven Years Ago. That one has Deathbed on it, which is an amazing song. Kind of out of character for them, but still amazing.”

Frank laughed, “You're ridiculous. I'm not making any promises of listening to a second album, alright?”

Gerard joined him back on the bed, “I'm sure you'll be changing your tune later, just wait and see.”

“Yeah, yeah. Sure I will.”

There was another knock on the door, and Mikey peaked his head in again.

“Yo, the pizza is here. It's in the kitchen.”

“Alright. Thanks, Mikey.”

“Yup, no problem. Pete and I will be in my room.”

“Use protection.” Gerard grinned, and Mikey flipped him off before leaving.

“So... pizza?” Gerard asked, turning back to Frank.

“Hell yeah.”

\--------

After Frank left, Gerard wasn't able to beat Mikey up for interrupting what he was now calling 'The Moment When a Really Hot Guy Almost Kissed Me.' Not the best name, but he didn't really care. But, Mikey had been busy doing who-knows-what with Pete (Gerard was pretty sure he knew, he just didn't want to think about it) for the rest of the night, and then falling asleep right after Pete left, giving Gerard absolutely no time to beat the shit out of him. Inconsiderate asshole.

He lay in bed trying to imagine what the kiss would have been like. Would it be short? Would there be tongue? Would it lead to anything, or would they both freak out and try to never think about it ever again? Should he have tried kissing Frank? No... no, he wouldn't be able to do that. No matter how obvious Frank could make it for Gerard, he still would have doubts that Frank _actually_ wanted to do anything with him. Doubts that Frank even _liked_ him.

Maybe he should wake Mikey up and beat the shit out of him anyway.

Nah, he could wait until morning.

Violent urges aimed at his younger brother aside, Gerard was actually really disappointed that Frank didn't try kissing him again after Mikey left. It had been haunting his mind ever since it happened, and Gerard just wanted to clear his mind.

But he couldn't, so he just thought about Frank's lips, how it would feel to kiss him, what his lip ring would feel like pressed against Gerard's lips.

Gerard stared at the ceiling and let his imagination run wild, let himself indulge in fantasies that would never happen. He closed his eyes, his mind occasionally wandering to meaningless things- school, winter camp, what Mikey and Pete were up to all night- but his thoughts always came back to Frank. Frank kissing him, touching him, having Frank laying on top of him... It wasn't all sexual, it was just- just things Gerard desperately wanted, but never had been able to get. He just wanted touches that were more than platonic, hands trailing across his bare skin, across his back, his chest, his legs.

It almost scared Gerard how desperate for human contact he was.

It wasn't... it wasn't that he didn't get any human contact, because he did. He just, he just didn't get _enough_. He simultaneously wanted no one to ever touch him and to constantly have someone touching him. What it actually was was he wanted to be touched, but only by very specific people. He didn't want to be touched by anyone he wasn't completely comfortable with, and even then he didn't want too much touching.

But with Frank- with Frank he just wanted him to constantly touch him. Wanted him to hold Gerard at night, when his mind was racing and he couldn't calm down, couldn't sleep, couldn't do anything but stare at the ceiling and hope his emotions would fucking calm down for 2 seconds so he could actually get some rest. He always got the worst at night, when no one was awake and he had to rely on himself to stay sane. Which, wasn't exactly the most reliable source of sanity, but goddamn did he try. It would be so much easier if he could have someone there to hold him, calm him down and tell him that everything would be okay.

So far, nothing too bad had happened to him, with only a few incidents that he was able to cover up well with long sleeves and hope that no one would question why he was wearing a sweater in the middle of summer.

He knew that Frank couldn't actually fix- fix whatever the hell was wrong with Gerard, but he just felt like it would be so much easier if he actually had someone to help him through it. Well, he did have friends who could help, but they never seemed to be awake at the right times, having actual _normal_ sleeping schedules. One time, he got so desperate for someone to just... just fucking vent out all his thoughts and feelings to that he texted Andy literally everything he was thinking at the time, which was a lot. Luckily, Andy hadn't mentioned it the next time he saw Gerard, which Gerard thanked him mentally for every time he saw Andy.

Gerard's thoughts came back to the almost-kiss that happened earlier. Fuck, he would never be able to stop thinking about this, would he? Not until something actually happened, then his mind would be occupied with thoughts of that.

He moved around in his bed, trying to get comfortable so he could fucking sleep. But, as always, he couldn't get comfortable. So he settled back on his back and started fantasizing about Frank again.

Frank pressing him down into his bed, kissing him deeply and making him stop thinking. Stop thinking about anything but Frank hovering above him, looking down at him with dark eyes, whispering dirty things into his ear as his hand traced down Gerard's chest, down, down, down...

Gerard slipped his hand into his pants and imagined that it wasn't his, that it was Frank, that he was kissing Gerard desperately and like it was the only thing that mattered. His eyes were shut tightly, mouth hanging open as he imagined all the things Frank could do to him, all the things Frank could make him feel. He came suddenly, eyes flinging open and quietly gasping out Frank's name.

He didn't try to think about the fact that he just jacked off to the thought of one of his closest friends.

He also wasn't sure what it meant that Frank, someone he met only a month ago, was one of his closest friends.

Gerard fell asleep just as the sun was rising, his mind still lingering on the thought of Frank almost kissing him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first song that Gerard sings in this is [If by House of Heroes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KMifRJMRI0), the second song they talk about is [Baby's a Red by House of Heroes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhRmAl07m5k).
> 
> and yes I am using fanfiction to promote House of Heroes fucking fight me nerds


	6. Matthew 2:11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey had always loved the youth group's Christmas party. Well, more specifically, he always loved the white elephant gift exchange. One time, years before Mikey was even old enough to go to youth group, someone had changed the purpose of the gift exchange to be that you had to bring the absolutely worse thing possible as a gift, and whoever brought the worst thing won a stocking full of candy- and it was a very big stocking.
> 
> Rumor has it that Gerard and Ray were the ones who changed the purpose of the gift exchange, but no matter how much Mikey asks them about it they refuse to say if it really was. According to Ray, it was a very scarring party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy thanksgiving here's a christmas chapter

Mikey had always loved the youth group's Christmas party. Well, more specifically, he always loved the white elephant gift exchange. One time, years before Mikey was even old enough to go to youth group, someone had changed the purpose of the gift exchange to be that you had to bring the absolutely worse thing possible as a gift, and whoever brought the worst thing won a stocking full of candy- and it was a _very_ big stocking.

Rumor has it that Gerard and Ray were the ones who changed the purpose of the gift exchange, but no matter how much Mikey asks them about it they refuse to say if it really was. According to Ray, it was a very scarring party.

When Mikey and Pete were old enough to go, they teamed up and decided that if either of them won they would share the winnings. The thing is, they got _very_ into it. So into it that Dallon had to set a few new rules: no raw meat or animal by-products, nothing sexual, and no stealing your gifts from people, and then giving it back to them as a “gift.”

Mikey and Pete were very proud of the ever-growing list of rules, it meant that they were succeeding.

They also would win every year, even though Dallon usually banned whatever it was they brought for future years. But, since they did always win, everyone else tried to take them down. No one has been able to yet, but they have gotten close.

They were going shopping today, looking through all the thrift stores that were around town looking for suitable gifts. Gerard was going to drive them, but he'd just go to the other side of the store and look for his own gifts while also trying not to pay attention to what Pete and Mikey were buying. After shopping, they would meet Ray at the mall and hang out together for the rest of the day, ending it by going back to Ray's house for a movie marathon. It was a Christmas tradition that the four of them loved very much.

Mikey got dressed, quickly throwing on jeans and a t-shirt, and then walked out to the kitchen. Gerard was humming to himself and putting the coffee grounds into the coffee maker. Mikey said, “Yo” then grabbed a mug and put it down next to Gerard's.

“Hey, you ready for today? I'm telling ya, this is the year I will beat your ass. I have it planned out and everything, you won't see it coming.”

Mikey scoffed, “Yeah, right. Tell that to our stocking, asshole.”

“You don't have it yet.” Gerard grinned.

“Yeah, well we will get it.” Mikey laughed, then said, “Oh, and did you tell Frank about me and Pete? Like... I know he doesn't care, but _really_ , dude?”

Gerard groaned and leaned his head against the cabinet, “Fuck, yeah, I did. I'm sorry, it just accidentally slipped out. Don't be mad.”

“I'm not mad, just... we're trying to keep this a secret, cause who the fuck knows how mom or dad would react if they found out. Hell, things would be shitty if anyone found out. Except maybe Ray. He probably would be cool about it.”

“Yeah, I know. But, Frank won't tell anyone, alright? It will be fine.”

“I know, I know.” Mikey leaned his head on Gerard's shoulder, “Why is it so stressful being gay.”

“Because everyone hates you. You specifically. They just... they just hate you so much.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “Fuck off.”

Gerard grinned at him, “Love you too.”

Mikey pushed Gerard out of the way of the coffee maker, then poured coffee into his mug. He flipped Gerard as he walked out, and heard him laugh. He went back to his room and flopped onto his bed, grabbing his phone to text Pete.

So far, the switch from best friends to boyfriends has worked _flawlessly_. Mikey couldn't be happier about how it has worked out. The other day, when Frank was over, they had just lied down on Mikey's bed and talked for hours, just like they always used to. Except, now Pete would idly run his hand through Mikey's hair, down his chest, tracing patterns into his hand. It was incredibly soothing, to say the least, and Mikey didn't want things to change. Now that he had Pete like this, he couldn't imagine going back to the way things were.

Mikey tried not to think about what would happen if anyone other than Gerard and Frank found out.

He knew that it was a very large possibility- that his mom could walk in while he was making out with Pete, that someone could see them holding hands out in public- but he just couldn't bring himself to plan for if that did happen. He wanted to just stay in this bubble, stay in this bubble and not worry or focus on the possibilities. He knew it was something he probably should worry about, but only to some extent. He shouldn't ruin his time with Pete by worrying about all the possibilities.

Mikey heard a knock on his door, and looked up just as Pete walked in. He smiled up at him, then said, “You're here! I thought you'd be a little longer.”

Pete closed the door and sat on the bed next to Mikey. He pulled off his coat and threw it onto a chair, then grinned at Mikey and kissed him quickly on the lips.

“I thought I might drop by early so I could spend a little more alone time with you, since Gerard will be with us while we shop.”

Mikey laughed softly, “You just can't get enough of me, can you?”

Pete grinned wider, “Nope.”

Mikey rolled his eyes and Pete kissed him again. They slowly laid down on the bed, careful not to break the kiss as they did so. Mikey was scared that someone might walk in, then he remembered that Gerard was the only one home and if he walked in he'd just groan and quickly leave.

It took Mikey a few moments to notice that Pete was lying on top of him. Not that they hadn't been in this exact position before, he just had never really thought about it. Now that he was thinking about it, he started to panic. He had no idea what to do if the situation escalated, this was completely new to him.

Pete seemed to notice Mikey's internal panic because he pulled away and had a concerned look in his eye. He gently brushed his hand across Mikey's cheek and asked, “You alright?”

Mikey chewed on his bottom lip nervously, “Uh, yeah, I'm fine. It doesn't matter.”

Pete sat up, “We can stop if you want.”

“No, no... it isn't that. I'm just... freaking out for no reason. Don't worry, it's okay.” Mikey smiled softly up at Pete, then pulled him back down for a kiss. Pete combed his fingers through Mikey's hair and Mikey ran his hands up and down Pete's back. Mikey let all of his worries float away and lost himself in the kiss.

Eventually, Pete pulled away slightly to say, “You know, if you do ever want me to stop, don't be afraid to say so. I don't want to do anything you're not comfortable with. Plus, I'm pretty sure Gerard will literally kill me if I did anything wrong to you, so, yeah. Not risking that.”

Mikey laughed softly, “He wouldn't kill you! He doesn't have a killer bone in his body!”

Pete raised his eyebrows, “You sure about that?”

“Of course I'm sure! What, did he say something to you? Oh, for fuck's sake! At church, when he pulled you away, he was threatening you, wasn't he? That dick...”

Pete laughed and kissed Mikey on the nose, “Don't worry, it isn't a big deal. He also gave me a sex talk, which was really fucking weird and uncomfortable. Like, that was worse then the whole 'I'll kill you if you hurt Mikey' thing.”

“Oh my God, he _didn't_! Jesus... I'm so sorry. What'd he say?”

“Something about condoms and lube? I think that was basically it. But it was still really weird, I don't want to be talking about sex with you with your _brother_. I'd rather not _think_ about sex with you while anywhere near your brother, actually.”

“But, you would want to think about sex with me when my brother isn't around?” Mikey said hesitantly, a faint blush spreading across his cheeks.

Pete licked his lips, “Maybe...”

Mikey bit his lip, then leaned up to kiss Pete. His hands slid under Pete's shirt and he let them rest on the warm skin of his back. Pete ran his hand up and down Mikey's side, then down his leg. Mikey unintentionally spread his legs more and, in response, Pete ran his hand over Mikey's crotch. Suddenly, all of Mikey's previous worries left his mind and all he could think was _PetePetePetePetePete_. He let out a small gasp and Pete bit his lip softly, tugging on Mikey's bottom lip with his teeth.

Mikey still had no idea what to do in this sort of situation, but now he just didn't care. Instead of panicking and wanting to pull away, all he wanted to do was pull Pete closer and make sure he _did not stop_.

Lucky for Mikey, Pete wasn't stopping. In fact, he was now rubbing Mikey through his jeans and it was nice and all, but Mikey wanted more. He was pulling at Pete's shirt, trying to hint that he wanted it _gone_ , and Pete laughed, pulling away for a second to take it off.

Mikey still, after many years of seeing Pete shirtless, could not get over how good he looked under his clothes. Not that he had seen anything other than his chest- at least, for now. Things might change soon, though- but God, was he a pretty thing to look at. He was well toned, having been a pretty athletic guy most of his life, and kind of tanned. Almost the opposite of Mikey's pale, awkward self. But, even though Mikey never really saw himself as _that_ attractive, Pete seemed to love the way Mikey looked. He would always kiss along his collarbones and whisper sweet nothings into Mikey's skin. It made chills go through him and Mikey would just close his eyes and let Pete run his hands over his body.

Pete started kissing him again, effectively pulling Mikey out of his thoughts and back into _PetePetePetePetePete_ mode _._ Pete's hands had found themselves under Mikey's shirt, and he was pressing up into the touch. He moved away again after a minute, trying to pull Mikey's shirt off. Mikey sat up slightly to help him, and soon they both were shirtless and Mikey had somehow flipped their positions so he was on top and straddling Pete.

Mikey sat up and just looked at Pete below him. His eyes were dark, his breathing quick and erratic, his mouth hanging open, his hair a mess... Mikey thought he looked absolutely fuckable. He trailed his hand down Pete's chest, stopping right before he got to his pants. They hadn't really done anything below-the-waist yet, and all of Mikey's worries were coming back.

“We don't have to do anything if you don't want to.” Pete said again.

Mikey replied by leaning down and kissing him. He let his hand go lower and tried to not think about what was happening. Pete seemed to started breathing heavier, and Mikey tried to focus more on his reactions and less on what his hand was doing exactly. He still had absolutely no idea what he was doing, but it couldn't be too hard, right?

Suddenly, the door opened and Gerard was walking in. He made a weird screaming noise, and quickly covered his eyes.

“oh... oh jeez. Okay- shit. I didn't realize you guys were- fuck, next time put a sock on the door or, or _something_.”

Mikey quickly scrambled off of Pete and Pete seemed to be hiding his face in his hands in a I-can't-see-him-he-can't-see-me gesture.

_Thank god we're both still wearing pants_ , Mikey thought.

What he actually said was something along the lines of, “What the hell, dude? Fucking knock next time!”

“Yeah, okay, well _now_ I know to do that! Jesus Christ- just, fuck. I was going to tell you that I would like to leave soon, so unless you're too horny to leave the goddamn bed, come on. I'll give you a few minutes to clean yourselves up.” Gerard left the room, hand still covering his eyes, mumbling something about 'goddamn younger brothers and their goddamn boyfriends.'

They sat on the bed awkwardly for a few minutes, Mikey picking at his jeans awkwardly and not looking at Pete. _We almost had sex_ , is the biggest thing that was going through his head at that moment. Pete eventually cleared his throat and said, “We probably should get ready.”

Mikey nodded, then grabbed his shirt, that he threw onto the ground, and put it on. Pete did the same, then put his jacket back on and turned to leave the room, hesitating slightly at the door. He turned back towards Mikey and was chewing his lip and looking at the floor. He quickly glanced up at Mikey and asked, “You... you don't care about what almost happened, right? I just... I just want to make sure you aren't freaked out.”

“No, I don't care about what just happened. I... I am kinda freaked out?” Pete started looking guilty, and Mikey held up his hands and quickly added, “No, no, don't worry! Not freaked out in a bad way. I'm more just... surprised that it did almost happen. Also, kinda disappointed that Gerard walked in when he did.”

Pete gave him a hopeful smile, “Really?”

“Yeah, really. I thought I made that clear earlier. You know, earlier when I was straddling you and rubbing your dick.”

Pete laughed, “Okay, that's true. I'm just paranoid about this sort of thing.”

Mikey walked over to Pete and kissed him softly, then pulled away and said, “It's okay, you don't have to be. We should...” He hesitated, looking down and scratching the back of his neck, then continued, “We should definitely pick up where we left off... sometime soon...”

Pete giggled and leaned in to whisper, “Yeah, we definitely should.” in Mikey's ear.

Mikey kissed him again, resting one hand on the back of Pete's neck and the other on his waist. Pete looped his fingers through Mikey's belt loops and pulled him closer. Mikey ran his fingers through Pete's hair and pulled on it, achieving a soft groan from Pete.

Eventually, there was a loud knock on the door, followed by Gerard yelling, “I'm not coming in, just in case, but hurry up. I want to leave already.”

Mikey sighed and pulled away from Pete. He opened the door and laughed, “Yeah, alright. We're ready, anyway.”

Gerard looked the two of them over, “Yep... all ready... and dressed... and not laying on top of each other...”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “Oh my God, just say what you want to say.”

“Why didn't you _lock your door_? Or at least tell me 'oh, hey, don't come into my room because Pete and I are going to _have sex_.'”

“It's not like we were planning this in advance! It just, you know, happened.”

Gerard huffed and crossed his arms, “Okay, whatever. Fine. Lets just go.”

He turned and walked down the hallway, away from Pete and Mikey, and left the house. Mikey was about to follow him, when Pete stopped him and asked, “Do you think he's upset? He seemed upset.”

“No, I don't think he's upset. He's probably just being a little pissbaby because he walked in on us. Don't worry about it.”

“Okay... I just, yeah. I don't know. It doesn't matter. But, lets go. He probably won't want to wait around too much longer.”

\-------

“Okay, so I definitely think Gerard is upset.” Pete whispered into Mikey's ear, making him jump.

“What? No he isn't! He seems normal to me, and I'm his _brother_. I know him better than anyone.”

“Okay, yes, maybe that's the case. But, consider this, he keeps glaring at me when you aren't paying attention.”

“He isn't glaring at you...” Mikey turned his head to look over at where Gerard is standing. He was examining a plaid suit jacket with great interest, and Mikey made a mental note to make sure he didn't buy it for himself. He had to set some boundaries for what Gerard should wear in public, and what he definitely shouldn't.

“Not now! But, that's because you're looking at him. I swear, he's glaring at me.”

Mikey patted Pete on the shoulder, “You're just being paranoid again. Don't worry about him, he's too enthralled by the ugly clothes here to pay attention to you.”

“I'm not being paranoid...” Pete mumbled, and Mikey rolled his eyes and kissed Pete on the forehead.

“He doesn't give a fuck what we do on our free time. Also, I think I just found the perfect gift.” Mikey picked up the object, and Pete laughed loudly.

“What the fuck is it.”

“I have no idea, but I want it.”

“I feel like we're going to get cursed for buying it.”

Mikey grinned, “And that's why it's the perfect Christmas gift.”

\-------

The week of the Christmas party had arrived, and the incident of Gerard walking in on Pete and Mikey was all but forgotten. Mikey did have to admit that Gerard seemed a little weird whenever he was around Pete, but it wasn't anything too bad. Just a weird glance here and there.

Something did seem to be bothering Gerard, though, and Mikey wanted to figure out what it was. It was frustrating that Gerard hadn't just told him, usually he did, but this time whenever Mikey asked he would just laugh and say nothing was bothering him. Which was a complete lie, considering how obvious it was that something was bothering him.

Maybe he was more upset about walking in on Mikey and Pete then he let on.

Maybe he was just upset because Frank missed last week's youth group meeting.

Whatever the cause, Mikey was too distracted at the moment to think too hard about it. He was trying to make sure his gift looked absolutely spectacular, another part of Mikey and Pete's terrible gift tradition- the wrapping had to look downright _professional_ or else it wasn't good enough.

Just as Mikey was finishing wrapping his gift, his phone started to ring. He put down the tape and answered it with a “Yo.”

“ _Hey, Mikeyway! So, any chance you can give me a ride tonight? My parents will be out of the house all night and so I'm kinda stranded._ ” Pete said.

“Yeah, of course we can. It's not like you live super far away or anything.”

“ _Cool, thanks man. Gerard isn't still pissed at me, right?_ ”

“Dude, we've been over this. Gerard was never pissed at you, he's just... you know.... weird.”

“ _Okay, no news to me. But, like, seriously. He seemed mad at me._ ”

“If you want I can ask him about it.”

“ _No, don't do that!_ ”

Mikey sighed and laid down on the ground, “Okay, well what do you want me to do?”

“ _Just... I don't know! Make sure he's not going to_ kill me _for fondling his younger brother._ ”

“He's not going to kill you.” Mikey giggled.

“ _He might! It's always the quiet ones, Mikey._ Always _the quiet ones._ ”

“Gerard isn't quiet enough for him to be considered a 'quiet one.' Like I said before, he's just weird. And maybe slightly unstable.”

“ _Okay, wow, thanks. That's exactly what I want to hear. You're a fantastic boyfriend._ ”

Mikey grinned, “I know I am. Oh, sorry, I have to go. I think I hear Gerard sharpening his knife collection and singing about murdering some guy named Pete Wentz. Not sure who that is, but I have a feeling he should be scared.”

“ _I hate you._ ”

“Love you too. But seriously, don't worry about Gerard. I think he's upset about something completely unrelated to you.”

“ _Maybe problems with Frank?_ ”

“Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. He doesn't seem to be texting as constantly, so maybe they had a fight. I keep trying to ask him, but he just brushes me off.”

“ _Yep, definitely sounds like Frank problems. Maybe they had a fight? Are they even a thing yet? Because I'm totally rooting for them. I have a bet with Toro and everything._ ”

Mikey laughed, “You made a bet with Ray?”

“ _Yeah, he was the one who started it, though. He came up to me a couple weeks ago and was like, 'how long do you think until Gerard and Frank start dating?'_ ”

“Seriously? I didn't even know Ray knew Gerard was gay.”

“ _I think it was just kind of a guessing sort of thing, since Gerard isn't exactly the sneakiest about his sexuality._ ”

“Yeah, that's true. So, how long did Ray think it would take before they got together?”

“ _He said late December early January. I said 'have you_ met _Gerard?' then guessed around spring or summer._ ”

Mikey laughed, “Yeah, you're probably closer. But, I'm guessing late winter early spring. Gerard might not do anything, but I feel like Frank will.”

“ _Hmm, that's true. I'm still thinking at least spring, though._ ”

“Well, we'll see. I'll keep you updated on the whole 'Frank-Gerard' situation.”

“ _The Grank situation!_ ”

“So, anyway, I'm breaking up with you now. It's been fun.”

Pete snorted, “ _Like you could break up with me. I'm too pretty._ ”

“Pfft, you wish. See you later, Pete. I'm hanging up now.” Mikey hung up before Pete could say anything else. He got off the floor and left his room to go see what Gerard was up to, figuring he would try again to find out what he was upset about.

Mikey walked into Gerard's room to see him sitting on his floor wearing Wonder Woman pajama pants and surrounded by wrapping paper. He looked up as Mikey came in and grinned.

“Dude! You gotta feel my new pants! They're soft as fuck.” Gerard stood up and grabbed Mikey's hand, trying to get him to feel his pants.

Mikey rubbed Gerard's leg and said, “Yeah, okay, wow. They are soft as fuck.”

“I know! I don't want to take them off! I probably won't actually. I've given up even trying to look like I care. I will wear pajama pants to church if I fucking _want_ to.”

Mikey laughed, “I thought you gave up caring a long time ago.”

“Okay, that's true. But, this is the first time I've worn pj's to church, so really I should be congratulated for holding out this long.”

“Yeah, it is kind of surprising that this is the first time you've worn pajamas to church- not counting lock-ins, of course.”

“Obviously.” Gerard started cleaning up the wrapping paper from his floor, and Mikey sat down on his bed and watched. After a few minutes, Gerard looked at Mikey and put his hands on his hips, “So, you gonna say what you came in here to say?”

“What are you talking-”

“Oh, shush. You know what I'm talking about. You didn't just come in here to feel my pants, Mikey. Now, spill.”

Mikey laid down and sighed, “Fine. Why have you been upset recently?”

“I haven't been upset-”

“Shut up, yes you have. Just tell me what's wrong!”

“Fuck, fine! I'm jealous, okay? I'm jealous that you have someone and I don't. It just- it just doesn't seem fair to me. Why the fuck did you have to interrupt when Frank was about to kiss me...” Gerard sat down on the ground and sighed, burying his head in his hand. Mikey slid off the bed and sat in front of him.

“When was Frank about to kiss you?” Mikey asked softly.

“A week or so ago? I don't know, back when he came over. He was about to kiss me, then you walked in and now... I don't know. Fuck, I've been panicking about how he actually feels about me so much that I feel weird talking to him. It just... doesn't feel the same. Like the spark we had is gone. Like he hates me.”

Mikey put his hands on Gerard's shoulders, “Hey, don't worry. He doesn't hate you, Gerard. He probably... he probably is just also panicking. Give it some time, the spark or whatever will come back. He doesn't hate you.”

“But what if he does? He probably does, Mikey. It makes sense! He stopped texting me as much, didn't show up to church... fuck, he hates me.”

Mikey slapped Gerard hard in the face, “Shut the fuck up. You're being an _idiot_. Why would he almost kiss you if he hated you? It doesn't make sense. I'm sure he had a perfectly logical reason for not showing up at church, other than him _hating_ you. Same with the texting thing. Have you been trying to text him, or are you just waiting for him to text you first? Maybe he thinks _you_ hate _him_.”

Gerard's eyes widened and he rubbed his cheek where Mikey had slapped him, “But I don't hate him! I can't have him thinking that! Fuck, I _am_ an idiot. Fuck, fuck... what if I ruined everything? Mikey, I think I deserve to get slapped again.”

Mikey patted the top of Gerard's head, “Nope, you're gonna have to do something worse if you want another slap from me. But, just talk to him! I'm sure you will clear things up if you do that, okay? Trust me, I have a boyfriend so therefor I am the master of everything related to relationships.”

Gerard rolled his eyes, “Implying you're the master of anything. But, you are probably right about this one thing. This single thing. This will be the only time I will ever take your advice, because you are terrible and I don't trust you.”

Mikey grinned, “That's probably smart, I give terrible advice.”

“I'm glad you understand. Now, leave my room. I don't like you.”

“I don't like you, too.” Mikey got up to leave, but then paused to say, “Oh, also we have to give Pete a ride to church tonight, since his parents can't drive him.”

“Yeah, yeah. Alright.”

“Also, he thinks you're going to kill him.”

Gerard turned around and laughed, “What? Why?”

“Because, you apparently kept glaring at him whenever he was around you.”

Gerard started laughing harder, “Oh my God, really? Was I glaring at him? I wasn't doing that on purpose. It must have been an internal older sibling thing.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Mikey shook his head and laughed, then left Gerard's room. At least now he finally knew what was bugging Gerard, even if it was something dumb.

At least he had Mikey to slap some sense into him.

\-------

Mikey was surrounded by loud music and Christmas sweater wearing teenagers and he was _loving it_. He also was loving the terrible Christmas sweater that Pete was wearing, mostly because it was gigantic and made him look _incredibly_ cute. It was taking all of Mikey's willpower not to drag him into a closet and kiss him a million times.

He was leaning against the air hockey table with Ray and Pete, when Josh walked up with a girl with long blue hair next to him. Josh grinned and said, “Hey, guys! This is Ashley!”

Ray smiled at her, “Nice to meet you, I'm Ray.”

“Yeah, nice to meet you, too.” Ashley smiled back at him, “So, you're friends with Josh? How long have you known him?”

“Since we were like, eight.” Mikey laughed, then added, “I'm Mikey, by the way.”

“Really? That's awesome. You probably have a lot of embarrassing stories, right?” Ashley grinned widely.

Josh gave Ray a look and Pete laughed, nudging Mikey slightly with his elbow, “Nope, definitely don't have any embarrassing stories about Josh.”

“Yep, Josh has done absolutely nothing stupid ever in his life. Dare or not.” Ray said, holding back laughter.

Ashley raised an eyebrow and looked between the four guys, “You're hiding something, aren't you?”

“Yo, Josh, come here! I wanna tell you something.” Tyler yelled over.

Josh glared at Ray and said, “Behave.”

Ray smiled innocently, “Of course I'll behave! What do you expect me to do?”

“You _know_ what I'm expecting you to do.”

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“Josh, Josh come here. Joosshh.” Tyler continued to yell.

“Looks like your lover boy needs you, Josh.” Ray grinned and Josh rolled his eyes, before walking over to where Tyler was.

Ray patted Ashley’s shoulder and said, “So, have you heard the hot sauce story?”

She shook her head and Ray grinned wider, then started to lead her away while saying, “Perfect! So, a few years ago at summer camp...”

Mikey stopped paying attention, because he knew where the story went. No point in listening to it when he was there when it originally happened.

Pete leaned his head on Mikey's shoulder and groaned, “I'm tired. Also, this sweater is basically a blanket, so I'm on the verge of falling asleep. Help me, Mikeyway. You're my only hope.”

Mikey chuckled, “You're a nerd. But, you can't sleep, we haven't even done the gift exchange yet.”

“Can I sleep after that?”

“Sleep all you want, babe.”

Pete grinned and buried his face in Mikey's neck, “Thank you. Also, have I mentioned that I love when you call me babe? I don't know, it's just a small new thing that I really like. Like, there are the big new things that I also really like. For example: making out. But just, the small things are also really nice.”

Mikey smiled softly and ran his fingers through Pete's hair, “Yeah, I know what you mean. Sometimes, the small things are what really makes this great.”

Pete turned his head slightly and whispered into Mikey's ear, “Wanna make out in the bathroom?”

Mikey blushed slightly and laughed, “Yeah, sounds good.”

Pete grinned and grabbed Mikey's hand, then dragged him in the direction of the bathroom. Mikey looked around quickly to see if anyone was paying too much attention to them. Thankfully, no one seemed to to notice the two boys holding hands and sneaking off to the bathroom. Pete pulled Mikey into the bathroom and locked the door, then turned around and grinned at Mikey.

“Making out with a boy in a church... I feel like this is so many layers of wrong.”

Mikey grinned back, “And yet I don't seem to care.”

Pete laughed and Mikey pulled him in by his sweater and kissed him softly. Pete rested his hands on the back of Mikey's neck and melted into the kiss. Mikey wrapped his arms around Pete's waist and lost himself in the kiss.

Eventually, Mikey had to pull away so they could breathe. He leaned his forehead on Pete's and laughed softly, “You're kinda amazing, Pete.”

Pete kissed Mikey on the nose, “You're not too bad yourself.”

Mikey blushed, “So, uh, how long do you think we have until people notice we're gone?”

“Maybe ten or so minutes? Give or take a bit.”

“Perfect.” Mikey grinned and leaned in to kiss Pete again.

\-------

Mikey examined the pile of gifts that was stacked under the large Christmas tree that stood at the back of the youth room. The amount of gifts seemed to dwindle since he and Pete had joined the youth group, and Mikey felt proud of himself. A lot of people were too scared of what they might get to actually want to participate in the exchange.

Dallon walked over to the tree too, then clapped his hands loudly and said, “Come on, guys. Sit down in a circle, it's time for the gift exchange.”

Mikey grinned at Dallon and he rolled his eyes. Pete ran over to Mikey, holding two large plates of snacks, and wiggled his eyebrows at Dallon, “Hey! Bet you can't wait to see what we brought this year, yeah?”

Dallon groaned, “It better be nothing that's on the list, or else I'm kicking your butts out.”

Pete handed one of the plates to Mikey and laughed, “No, of course not, silly! We wouldn't be dumb enough to do that. We're in it to win it.”

“It's actually relatively tame this year.” Mikey said, through a mouthful of cookie.

“That's because we got everything _too_ bad banned already.”

“Hey, we want _some_ credit for the 'banned items' list.” Ray said as he walked up with Gerard.

“Yeah, we've been bringing gross gifts since you were in _diapers_.”

“Gerard, that is literally impossible.”

Gerard grinned, “And yet impossibility is possible in this exact situation.”

“That doesn't make any sense.”

“Your _face_ doesn't make any sense.”

Dallon clapped his hands together again, “Okay, okay, let's just agree that the four of you are a youth leader's nightmare and continue on with the night.”

Pete winked and blew a kiss at Dallon, making him sigh and mutter about why did he want to work with youth again? Mikey sat down in between Pete and Gerard, making sure to not spill anything from his plate, and nudged Gerard with his elbow, “Have you seen Frank?”

Gerard started pulling at his hair and looked down, “Oh, uh, no. I don't think he came.”

Mikey held his plate out for Gerard, “Cookie?”

Gerard looked back up and smiled softly, “Thanks.”

Gerard took one of the cookies and started eating it, then Mikey heard the door to the youth room open and he looked up to see Frank walking in, looking hurried. Mikey nudged Gerard again and said, “Frank's here.”

Gerard's head shot up and he looked in the direction of the door, a large smile spreading across his face. He got up and walked over to Frank, and Mikey smirked to himself at how excited Gerard looked to see Frank. It was adorably obvious how hard Gerard had fallen for Frank, and how obvious Frank liked him back. Both of their faces lit up when the other walked in the room and Mikey was honestly surprised that nothing hadn't happened yet. Apparently, that was his fault.

Well, Mikey figured that Gerard's emotional problems were probably also to blame. He seemed to always get attached very easily, but also be afraid to actually _open up_ to anyone he befriended. It was like something went wrong while he was supposed to develop the emotional part of his brain and now it's all fucked up and he either goes all out with how he feels or shuts down completely. Or, somehow, a mixture of the two.

What ever was wrong with Gerard made it so he wasn't exactly the best at showing romantic feelings for people, the other person basically had to do everything first or else he would second guess that the other person _actually_ wanted it to happen.

Mikey wasn't sure if it was normal to know this much about your siblings emotional issues.

Gerard came back, pulling Frank along with him. He wasn't smiling, but Mikey could tell that he was smiling on the _inside_ , and that's what mattered. He had this look in his eye that just screamed _“Frank doesn't hate me! Frank doesn't hate me!”_ and it was kind of adorable.

They sat down next to Mikey again- sitting practically on top of each other, Mikey noted- and Dallon started talking again.

“Okay, so, as you all know there is quite a long list of 'banned items' because of some... trouble makers.” He stopped to glare at Pete, Ray, Mikey, and Gerard, then continued, “That have took it upon themselves to make my job _literally_ Hell. But, anyway, the list has been updated since last year: Nothing sexual, no animals or animal by-products, no human excrement, nothing _illegal_. Handmade gifts are okay, but _please_ no glitter. Last year, it took us hours to clean up, and there is still glitter in the carpet. So, if any of you have something from this list, take your gift out of the pile.”

Nate sheepishly reached forward and took his gift back, causing Dallon to sigh loudly. Frank's eyes had widened drastically and he shook his head, “Uh, I think I might have not understood the purpose of this thing.”

Pete looked at Frank and raised his eyebrows, “Why? What'd you bring?”

Frank looked down and laughed awkwardly, “I, uh, bought a literal white elephant stuffed animal. I thought it would be funny but, uh, yeah.”

“Oh my God, which one is yours? I want it, _please_.” Hayley asked, looking at Frank with pleading eyes.

“No! _I_ want it! I don't want to accidentally get Pete and Mikey's gift again.”

“I think I deserve it because I got the glitter poop from last year.”

“Guys, _please_ calm down. Frank's gift will be left a surprise just like all the other gifts, alright? Stop arguing about it. Just... chill.” Jon said from where he was sitting on the couch, watching over the kids. There were a few sighs and grumbles from the circle, but everyone mostly quieted down.

William walked over holding a hat and stuck his hand in, shuffling the contents inside of it around. He went into the middle of the circle and said, “Alright, so there's a number on each of these pieces of paper for each of the gifts, so pass it around and take one. Whoever gets the piece of paper with the 'one' on it will go first, and so on and so on, get it? Most of you have probably already done this, I'm just going through it again because we have a few new people.”

He smiled at Frank and handed him the hat, “You can go first, since you're new.”

Frank took the hat, then cautiously reached his hand in and drew a piece of paper. He passed the hat to Gerard, then unfolded the paper and read out, “Uh, I got number ten.”

They continued around the circle, until it got back to Frank. William took the hat back, then sat down on the couch with Jon. Dallon looked around the circle and said, “Okay, so who got number one?”

Gerard raised his hand and Mikey noticed Frank whispering something in his ear, before Gerard got up and immediately grabbed a small, misshapen gift that was wrapped in newspaper. They went through the numbers, the pile of gifts slowly getting smaller, until Frank was left with the last gift.

Mikey _almost_ felt bad, since the last gift was the one he brought with Pete, but in reality he just wanted to see Frank's reaction. But hey, it could have been _much_ worse. He could have gotten last year's gift, which people are still debating whether or not it was human poop or dog poop (and, of course, Pete and Mikey never say).

But, it was time for people to open their gifts, and as always the person who picked last opened their gift first. Frank hesitantly started opening the gift, seemingly scared of what was inside. The tore away at the wrapping paper and examined the object in his hand with confusion and fear on his face.

“What... what _is_ it?”

Mikey and Pete grinned at him and yelled, “Surprise!” in unison.

“That... that doesn't answer my question guys.” He turned it over in his hands a few times then said, “Wait, does it have a _face_? Oh god, it opens too...”

Pete and Mikey were grinning at the “gift” like proud parents, and Pete said, “Isn't it great? I hope you like it.”

“I feel like I just got cursed for owning this.”

“I know! Tell us if your house gets haunted because of us!”

Frank looked desperately at Dallon and asked, “Can I trade with someone?”

Dallon shrugged, “No, sorry, no trading. Things get too chaotic when we allow trading.”

Frank slowly put the gift on the ground and whispered, “Do you think it'd kill me if I tried to destroy it.”

“Probably, I think it's sentient.” Mikey replied, reaching over Gerard to pat Frank's leg sympathetically. Frank glared at Mikey and Pete, then gingerly opened the container and sighed when nothing was in it.

“We were gonna put glitter in it, but then we remembered that glitter was banned last year.”

“It's a shame, really. I would have _loved_ to see a pissed off, glittery ghost.”

Mikey's eyes lit up, “That would have been fantastic!” He started poking Gerard repeatedly in the shoulder, “Gee, Gee, you have to draw me a glittery ghost, Gee. I need it.”

“No, stop it. You already have asked me for like, ten other drawings and you should know by now that I'm never getting around to them.”

“But, _Gee_! A glittery ghost!! That's right up your alley!! It would be _amazing_.”

Dallon interrupted Mikey, “Okay, hush, guys. It's not the time for family disputes, you can do that on your own time. It's the next person's turn.”

They went back through all the people, everyone gingerly opening their gifts and praying to God that they didn't get anything too terrible. Mikey was slightly disappointed when all he got was a book about different types of poop, but he figured that there wasn't much that people could actually do- except, of course, giving possibly cursed objects to your siblings “totally not boyfriend.” He also was not at all surprised when Gerard opened his gift and he just so happened to have Frank's little elephant plush, even though it was totally obvious that Frank told him in advance which one was his.

Mikey was also disappointed to find out that Dallon had taken away the contest part of the gift exchange, so now the only prize he got was the terrified look on Frank's face every time he looked at the... thing Pete and Mikey had picked out. To be fair, it was actually not that bad of a prize. Frank's terrified face was _hilarious_.

The five of them- Mikey, Pete, Frank, Gerard, and Ray- were sitting crammed together on one of the couches. Pete was resting his hand on Mikey's thigh while he had an animate discussion with Frank about the upsides to owning a cursed and/or haunted object, and Mikey was wondering if maybe they should be a little less obvious about the new state of their relationship. It probably wouldn't be too bad if one of the kids in the youth group found out, but all of their mouths would run and spill out secrets to anyone who might be listening, so they had to be careful.

Mikey was snapped out of his thoughts by Pete shaking his leg and asking, “Yo, we're still going over to your house, right? Gerard 'forgetful pants' Way over here says that 'he had no idea we were planning to come over' and 'this is all news to me, dude,' so it's up to you to confirm any previous plans.”

Mikey laughed, “As far as I know, you guys are coming over. Unless, your plans changed, of course.”

“Okay, since when? Why didn't I hear about this? Did you guys even tell me this, or did you leave me in the dark on purpose?” Gerard asked, looking confused and like he was trying to go through the previous week to try and remember anything.

“I'm pretty sure we told you, Gee.”

Gerard pulled at his hair in frustration, “Then why don't I _remember_?”

“Because you have a shitty memory?” Pete piped up, making Gerard glare at him. Pete just held up his hands defensively, “What? It's true!”

Gerard rolled his eyes, “Whatever. You probably told me while I was focusing on something else. You gotta tell me these things when I'm fully paying attention to you, or else it will completely slip my mind and I'll be confused.”

Ray patted him on the shoulder, “We'll remember that for next time. But, anyway, it's just gonna be the five of us, right?”

Mikey leaned his head on Pete's shoulder, “Yup, just the five of us.”

Suddenly, Josh was in front of them with his arms crossed and glaring at Ray. Ray grinned up at him and said, “Hello, Josh!”

“You told her the hot sauce story? I thought you promised you wouldn't!”

Ray laughed, “I'm pretty sure Gerard was the one who promised that. I promised _nothing_.”

“I still can't believe you did that!”

Ashley walked up and rested her arm on Josh's shoulder, “I can't believe _you_ did _that_. And with hot sauce, too. Wasn't it _painful_?”

Josh blushed crimson and flinched away from Ashley, “It was very painful and embarrassing and I'm never playing truth or dare at summer camp ever again and this is the _end_ of this conversation, thank you very much.”

Ashley patted him sympathetically on the head, “It's okay, I've done a lot of terrible things because of dares too.”

Josh raised his eyebrow, “Like what?”

Ashley grinned, “Stories for another time, my friend. Anyway, I gotta get going. You still giving me a ride, right, Josh?”

Josh nodded, “Yeah, I am. C'mon, lets go. Before Ray decides to tell you anything else.”

“Like how you called Ashley a 'blue haired angel?'” Gerard asked, smiling innocently.

Ashley started giggling and Josh looked like he was about to explode. He glared at Gerard, then muttered something to himself as he dragged Ashley away from the five boys. Mikey got up and stretched his arms above his head, then said, “We should get going, too. I'm pretty sure there's a tub of ice cream in the freezer with our names on it.”

Pete used Mikey to pull himself off the couch and grinned, “Sounds fantastic! Lemme just grab my jacket.”

 


	7. Luke 24:29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard shrugged again and Ray threw his hands up in the air out of frustration, “It's about Frank, isn't it?”
> 
> Gerard gaped at him, “What? I- how did you know?”
> 
> Ray laughed, “Dude, you totally whispered 'holy shit' the first time you saw him. It's not hard to figure things out.”
> 
> “I-I did not whisper 'holy shit!'”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh man idk why it took me so long to write this chapter but it did for some reason whoops sorry
> 
> also, i'm gonna be taking a break from updating until Christmas because A) the next chapter i have planned is probs gonna be super long and will take me a while to write and B) i want to write more chapters in advance so i won't be as stressed out and shit so sorry! but it'll only be for a few weeks and i have ppl who definitely won't let me abandon this work so no need to worry about this never getting finished

There were a few things that Gerard had always loved since he was a child: ice cream and Ray Toro. Ray had been there for Gerard through lots of ups and downs, and when said ups and downs were things Gerard didn't want anyone to know about, he went to ice cream. Right now, though, he was going to have both Ray _and_ ice cream, so he was feeling pretty good in general.

But, Gerard was starting to feel like maybe he was keeping _too many_ secrets from Ray- who had been his best friend since, well, basically birth. Well, he didn't actually have that many secrets, but the few secrets he did have he hadn't told Ray yet- which, now that Gerard was actually thinking about it, was totally ridiculous. It's not like Ray would care about most of the things Gerard was hiding from him, so why didn't he say anything?

Well, Gerard had decided that now was about time he told Ray about his sexuality. Maybe not the gender thing, though. That could wait until he had figured it out for himself a little more.

Gerard wasn't sure why he started thinking about this on the way back from the youth group's Christmas party, but he figured it probably had something to do with Frank. Ever since Frank had arrived, he had been having trouble hiding the whole “lusting after a guy” thing. Which, now that he was thinking about it, wasn't exactly gay, because of Gerard's whole gender debacle. Really, it probably was closer to being straight then if he liked a girl, since Gerard's gender seemed to lean closer to the “female” side of things.

Which, now made him think about the fact that Frank was a homosexual _male_ and probably would always think of Gerard as a _guy_ and oh boy, he really needed to stop letting his brain go off like this. It would just lead to stress, and he definitely did _not_ need any more stress in his life.

Someone started tapping Gerard's shoulder, making him jump and yelp. Mikey was leaning forward and grinning at him widely, “Whoops, didn't mean to scare ya. But, we were just wondering how long it would take you to realize you totally drove past our house.”

Gerard cursed and shook his head, “The fuck do you mean I drove past our house?”

“I mean, you weren't paying any attention and totally drove _right_ past our driveway. Turn around, or else I'm climbing into that seat and doing it for you.”

“Like I would let you do that...” Gerard mumbled, before finding a place to turn around and pulling up to their house. Apparently, he was so caught up in his thoughts that he wasn't paying attention to where he was going. Thank god he didn't accidentally crash the car, that would have been bad.

He also, apparently, had completely missed whatever the four other people in the car were talking about, because he was totally lost when they tried asking him his opinion on their conversation.

Frank laughed when Gerard gave him a blank, confused look, then shook his head and patted Gerard on the shoulder, before following Mikey into the house. Ray hung back a second with Gerard, then quietly asked, “Dude, you okay? You've seem to be in a completely different place for the entire drive home.”

Gerard laughed nervously, “Yeah, just got lost in my thoughts, I guess.”

Ray raised his eyebrow skeptically, “What sort of thoughts?”

“Just... you know... thoughts.”

“Alright... just, feel free to tell me if anything is wrong, okay?”

Gerard nodded slightly, then walked into the house, followed closely by Ray.

Ray often acted as a mother hen to Gerard, which sometimes bugged Gerard. He knew that Ray meant well, but he also couldn't help feeling guilty about how Ray worried about him. He honestly was _fine_ , and he hated when people tried to say otherwise. He could deal on his own, thank you very much. He didn't need to worry about worrying his friends, it just stressed him out.

Gerard tried to remember the last time he _didn't_ feel stressed.

He was pretty sure it was before he became a teenager.

Gerard tried to push his stress to the back of his head and just focus on what was going on around him. The five of them were standing around the kitchen- Pete sitting on the counter, Mikey taking the ice cream out of the freezer, and Ray and Frank sitting down at the table. He smiled to himself, happy that he had this little group of friends who actually _liked_ him- who actually would willingly hang out with him. Sometimes he was amazed that anyone actually was able to put up with him.

Gerard sat down next to Frank and smiled at him. It was hard to believe that he had only known Frank for a month, it had already seemed like years. They had just clicked so easily, it was amazing. But he didn't only click well with Gerard, he clicked well with _everyone_. He was just the sort of guy who was able to talk to people easily, had a certain level of self confidence- or, Gerard suspected, it was actually closer to false bravado. No one could act that casual in a new environment without putting up _some_ sort of act- that made him extremely likeable, even if he was openly gay and non-Christian.

Gerard wasn't paying attention to the surrounding conversation again, so he tried to tune back in and figure out what they were talking about before anyone could notice he wasn't listening.

“-I'm just saying cookie dough is by far the best type of ice cream.” Frank said, leaning back in his chair and stretching his arms over his head.

“Uhm, no, sorry you're wrong, Frank. Mint chocolate chip is the best ice cream flavor and all other ice cream flavors at it's awesomeness.” Mikey nudged Pete with his elbow and added, “I'm right, right? I'm totally right.”

“You're totally right, babe.”

Mikey grinned at Frank, “See? I'm right.”

“Dear God, please stop saying the word 'right'. You're gonna make me punch you.” Gerard laughed.

“You're no fun, Gee! But, you totally know I'm right.”

“Okay, yes you are right in this situation, but that doesn't mean you haven't said the word 'right' too many times.”

Frank crossed his arms and looked around the room, “Am I seriously the only one here who thinks cookie dough is better than mint chocolate chip? Ray?”

Ray grinned sheepishly at Frank, “Sorry, dude. I'm on the mint chocolate chip side of this debate.”

Gerard patted Frank's shoulder sympathetically, “It's okay, cookie dough is still great.”

“Yeah! I love cookie dough ice cream, but nothing can compare to mint chocolate chip.”

“You guys totally suck.”

“No, we're just _right_.”

“Okay, seriously, am I the only one getting annoyed at how much you guys are using that word? It's starting to sound weird to me.”

Mikey leaned in close to Gerard and whispered in his ear, “Rightrightrightrightrightrightright.”

Gerard shoved Mikey away and glared at him, and all Mikey did was grin and laugh at Gerard.

Sometimes he really hated Mikey.

The topic seemed to have changed again and _jeez_ Gerard really had to pay more attention, because he was lost again. He wasn't even lost in his thoughts for that long this time, how did this keep happening? This is why he was terrible in social situations.

“Gerard, Gee _._ _Geeee_.” Mikey was poking his face and Gerard looked up at him in confusion.

“What?”

“We're going to the living room to watch movies, dude.”

“Oh.” Gerard got up to follow everyone into the living room, before realizing that he hadn't actually gotten himself any ice cream. He went back into the kitchen and was scooping some into a bowl, when he heard someone else walk in and ask, “Alright, what's going on with you?”

Gerard turned to face Ray, “I don't know what you're talking about.”

Ray crossed his arms, “You have been way more spacey and distant today, Gee. It's pretty obvious that your mind has been occupied with things other than weird Christmas parties and ice cream.”

Gerard shrugged noncommittally and looked at the ground, “I don't know? I've just been... you know... thinking.”

Ray raised an eyebrow, “Thinking about _what_?”

“Just... things.”

“Gerard, just tell me what's wrong. I won't care, and I just want to help.”

Gerard shrugged again and Ray threw his hands up in the air out of frustration, “It's about Frank, isn't it?”

Gerard gaped at him, “What? I- how did you know?”

Ray laughed, “Dude, you totally whispered 'holy shit' the first time you saw him. It's not hard to figure things out.”

“I-I did _not_ whisper 'holy shit!'”

“Uh, _yeah you did_. I don't think you said it consciously, but you definitely said it.”

Gerard blushed and tried to hide his face by looking at the ground again. Ray stepped forward and patted him on the head, “It's okay, dude. I totally understand why you whispered holy shit, Frank's a very attractive guy.”

Gerard giggled, “That is definitely true.”

Ray nodded, “So, what sort of troubled thoughts are you having about Frank? Scared he won't like you in the same way? Scared he _does_ like you in the same way? Come on, Gee, tell me your boy troubles.”

“I never thought I'd hear you say 'tell me your boy troubles.'” Gerard laughed.

“I'm full of surprises. But, c'mon, lay it on me. I can handle all your emotional boy talk.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“Yes, I am positive. I can deal with _all_ of your emotional shit.”

Gerard shook his head, “Even _I_ can't deal with all of my emotional shit.”

“That's because you're dealing with it first hand. I just pat you on the head while you're crying and say 'there there.'”

“I don't even cry that often.”

“Not externally, but internally you're constantly crying. And I can tell this because I can _literally_ see inside your head.”

Gerard shoved him, “I'm not constantly crying internally.”

Mikey popped his head through the doorway and asked, “Yo, what are you guys doing in here? You're taking forever.”

“Sorry, we were talking.”

“Ooh about what?” Mikey stepped further into the kitchen and leaned against one of the cupboards.

“Boy troubles.” Ray replied.

“Ah, so Frank?”

“Yep.”

“Did Gee tell you that Frank almost kissed him?”

“Mikey!” Gerard glared at him and Mikey shrugged.

Ray grinned, “Ohh so Frank _does_ like you back. When are you gonna make a move?”

Gerard started pulling at his hair, “Uh, I don't know? I was just gonna wait for him to do something.”

Ray groaned, “Seriously? Oh my God, you're such a hopeless idiot. I almost forgot about that.”

“I'm not a hopeless idiot! I just don't want to do something dumb and then ruin our friendship.”

“He already almost kissed you, I don't get how if you do something it'll ruin your friendship.”

“Gee's paranoid about this sort of thing.”

“I'm not _paranoid_ -”

Mikey snorted, “Riiight.”

“What? I'm not!”

“Hon-”

“Don't 'hon' me!”

“Hon, you are _such_ a paranoid motherfucker okay don't even get me _started_ -”

“You guys are in here talking about _who knows_ what, and I'm stuck in the living room watching Pete make his ice cream into a melted mess. Help, he's making _noises_ as he stirs it _._ ” Frank said with a laugh, walking into the kitchen and leaning against the wall, then added, “What _are_ you guys talking about anyway?”

Gerard blushed and tugged at his hair, “Uh, nothing important. Just things.”

“Well come back out here it's getting boring with just Pete.” Frank replied.

“Hey, I heard that!” Pete yelled.

“Yeah, sorry. You guys go ahead; Gee and I need to talk.” Ray said.

Frank gave the two a suspicious look, “What are you talking about?”

Ray waved him off, “It's nothing important, don't worry about it. Just go hang out with the two lovebirds.”

“Wait, 'lovebirds'? How did you...?” Mikey asked, looking confused.

Ray rolled his eyes, “Pete literally called you 'babe' five minutes ago, I'm not an idiot.”

Mikey shrugged, “Eh, oh well. You would've figured it out eventually, anyway.”

“Exactly, you two aren't the most subtle about it. Now, _shoo_.”

Frank gave Gerard one last look, before following Mikey out of the kitchen. Gerard shifted uncomfortably and Ray rolled his eyes again.

“Seriously, Gee, make a move. It won't ruin your friendship, it will just make you _both_ happier. Trust me.”

Gerard groaned, “But, how do I do that? I literally have no experience, Ray. This is completely new territory for me.”

Ray put his hands on Gerard's shoulders, “Listen, just ask him over again, make sure you two are the only ones home, and then make it clear how you feel. Whether it's with your words or your actions, just let him know you have a huge, gay crush on him.”

“Okay, but how do I do that?”

“Jesus, you really are a hopeless idiot. Listen, he almost kissed you, right? Why did he stop?”

“Mikey walked in...”

Ray laughed, “Seriously?”

Gerard hit him on the arm, “Shush, this isn't funny.”

Ray bit his lip to stop from laughing more, “Sorry, it's just so dumb and cliché. But yeah, you're kind of an idiot. He fucking likes you! He tried to _kiss_ you, what more proof do you want? You don't have to wait around for him to make a move, you can do it yourself.”

Gerard chewed on his bottom lip in thought. Ray was right, he was being an idiot. He could do this, it wouldn't be the end of the world. He just had to suppress his doubting thoughts and he'd be fine. Which, now that he thought about it, would actually be pretty hard. Maybe he could just push them to the back of his mind long enough for him to do something. He smiled at Ray and rubbed the back of his neck, “You're right, I am an idiot. I can... I can do this.”

Ray grinned, “Hell yeah you can! Go get that asshole.”

“He's not an asshole...”

“He's kind of an asshole. A loveable asshole, but an asshole nonetheless. So, is that all your boy troubles? Or is there anything else I need to help with?”

Gerard tugged on his hair slightly, “Uh, there's kind of one more thing... But, uh, I'm not sure how much you could help with it.”

Ray crossed his arms, “Try me.”

Gerard looked at the ground and pulled his hair, “Uhm... I'm kind of trans? Ish? And he's a gay guy...”

Ray raised his eyebrow, “Trans-ish?”

“It's very complicated and confusing!”

“Okay, yeah, I'm sure it is. But why does that matter with Frank?”

“He's _gay_. Homosexual. Only like guys. Do you see where I'm going with this?”

“Oh! You're afraid that if he finds out he won't like you anymore?”

Gerard shifted nervously, “Uh, he kinda already knows...”

“Are you saying you told Frank that you're trans before me?”

“In my defense, it was on accident.”

Ray laughed, “Of course it was. But, how did he react?”

“He was really cool about it, but that doesn't mean he doesn't like me anymore.”

“When did this happen? Before or after he tried kissing you?”

“After. What if that's the reason he didn't try again?” Gerard started panicking and Ray put his hand back on his shoulders.

“Dude, chill. You could try asking him about it? See what his side is before you start freaking out.”

Gerard tried to calm himself and nodded, “Yeah, yeah okay. You're probably right.”

“Of course I'm right. I'm _always_ right.”

Gerard laughed, “Yeah, totally.”

“What? I am! I'm like everything that is right in this world.”

Gerard shook his head, “You wish.”

“No, it's just the truth, Gee. I literally cannot do or say anything wrong. You have to trust me, no matter what.”

Gerard shoved him, “I only trust you 'cause I've known you for so long. Also, you have a trustworthy face. But, that doesn't mean I _should_ trust you on everything.”

Ray laughed, “No, I'm just a very trustworthy person. But seriously, just talk to him. See what he has to say, and stop worrying so much. One of these days you're gonna explode from stress, I swear.”

Gerard rolled his eyes, “Yeah, whatever. I'll try talking to him.”

“Good. Tell me how it goes! Also, tell me if you two start smooching.”

Gerard laughed, “Yeah, okay. I'll tell you if we 'start smooching.'”

Ray grinned, “Great! Everything will work out perfectly.”

“Hopefully.”

Ray made a face, “But, this will make me the awkward fifth wheel. I don't want to be the fifth wheel.”

“You're just gonna have to deal.”

“You are so cruel to me, and after everything I have done for you. I'll just eat ice cream and stare at you guys passive aggressively.”

“That sounds like a great plan-”

“Gerard, come save me. Pete and Mikey are singing and I'm scared.” Frank called from the other room, followed by Pete and Mikey laughing.

Ray grinned, “Go, go save Frank. Be his knight in shining armor.”

Gerard laughed and shook his head, then left the kitchen to see what Mikey and Pete were doing to Frank. He pushed his worries from before to the back of his mind and just tried to focus on the present. Ray was right, he just had to talk to Frank.

Which wouldn't be terrifying at all.

Gerard walked into the living room to see Pete standing on the couch and Mikey sitting on the ground grinning up at him. Frank was sitting on the armchair and looking grumpy and Gerard raised his eyebrow and laughed, asking, “What happened in here?”

“We were singing and Frank got annoyed.” Pete replied.

“Okay, but why are you standing on the couch? And why is Mikey on the ground?”

Mikey shrugged, “I felt like it, and Pete was getting into the singing.”

“Man, we're gone for two minutes...” Ray said with a laugh.

Gerard shook his head and sighed dramatically, “These youngsters just need constant supervision, I guess.”

“Good thing we're here to keep them on a pure, Godly path.”

Gerard nodded approvingly, “Yes, we will guide them through their spiritual journey.”

Mikey started giggling uncontrollably, “Gee, you're more sinful than me. You're like the most impure, filthy virgin I know. And that's including Pete.”

Pete got off the couch and hit Mikey on the shoulder, “Hey! I'm plenty disgusting!”

“Yes, but have you _met_ Gee? Honestly, the only reason he doesn't get in trouble more is cause he's quiet about his sinfulness.”

Gerard grinned, “That's probably true. My rebellion is a more quiet, subtle kind of rebellion.”

“I know, it's totally unfair. I'm like constantly in trouble, but you're worse than me.”

“To be fair, we're kinda both really gross.”

“And yet we're both virgins.”

Gerard shook his head, “It's a real shame.”

Gerard had almost forgotten about Frank and glanced at him quickly to see him picking at a loose thread on a pillow, blushing slightly. Gerard blushed too, and started pulling at his hair awkwardly. He really hoped Mikey didn't bring up any weird sex stuff.

“At least I don't have a thing for doing it in public.”

Of fucking course he brought up weird sex stuff.

Gerard's mouth dropped open and his face turned crimson. He covered his face with his hands and stuttered out, “I- I, uh- well, at least I wouldn't eat yogurt made out of _cum_.”

“Hey, I said I would only do that with a specific person.” Mikey said, quickly glancing at Pete.

“It's still fucking gross.”

“As if you aren't gross.”

“I might be gross, but at least I have limits.”

“Says the guy who thinks blood is hot.”

“You also think blood is hot, asshole.”

Ray rolled his eyes, “I think we can all agree that you two are both disgusting.”

“Yeah, okay, that's true. But hey, at least I've gotten further than you!” Mikey grinned at Gerard, then winked at Pete.

Gerard rolled his eyes, “Not my fault no one has wanted to date me.”

Ray patted him on the shoulder, “That's not true! There was that one girl who liked you that one time. What was her name again?”

Gerard looked at him in confusion, “What girl?”

“There was a girl who totally like you like, a few years back. Shit, what was her name? Wait, did you not realize that she liked you? Cause it was pretty obvious.”

“What? No? Who was she? When was this? How obvious was it? Because you can be pretty observant and-”

“-And Gee can be really oblivious.” Mikey interrupted.

Gerard glared at him, “I am _not_ oblivious.”

Pete wrapped his arm around Mikey's waist, “You totally can be, dude.”

“You guys suck.”

“What? It's true! You miss things that are so fucking obvious, it's kinda hilarious.”

“Also frustrating.” Ray added.

“Yeah, true. Sometimes I just wanna grab you and yell 'HOW ARE YOU NOT SEEING THIS.'”

Gerard huffed and sat on the couch, “You guys still suck. Point shit out to me if I'm missing something obvious.”

Mikey coughed loudly and quickly nodded his head in Frank's direction, making Gerard blush crimson. Frank was still sitting in the armchair looking vaguely awkward and nervous, and Gerard just wanted to change the subject. He started pulling at his hair and asked Frank, “Oh, did you ever listen to Mmhmm?”

Frank seemed to relax slightly and replied, “Oh, no I never got around to it.”

Ray joined Gerard on the couch and nudged him slightly, “Are you trying to introduce him to the wonderful world of Christian music?”

“You know it. He said Relient K was lame, so I'm making him listen to Mmhmm.”

Pete gasped dramatically, “What? Relient K isn't lame!”

“That's exactly what I said.”

“Oh my god... I'm surrounded by losers...” Frank shook his head.

“Uhm? Excuse me? We are not _losers_. I'll have you know I listen to bands who are signed by _Tooth and Nail_.” Mikey said with a grin.

Ray gasped and threw a hand over his forehead, “Oh, the horror! How has he grown into such a rebel? Where did we go wrong, Gerard?”

Gerard sighed and shook his head, “I just don't know, Raymond. We should have saved him from the menace that is rock music.”

“How are we ever going to save him from this tragedy? Next thing you know, he'll be dyeing his hair and getting piercings! When will it end?”

“I already have a nose piercing-”

Gerard started fake crying, “It's too late! We already lost him.... he's on the road to damnation now, Raymond.”

“I'm so confused, what's Tooth and Nail?” Frank asked, wide eyed and looking slightly concerned.

“It's the cool record label with all the edgy Christian bands, like Anberlin and Underoath.” Mikey replied.

“Anberlin wasn't a Christian band, they were a band with Christians _in_ it.” Pete said.

“Oh, wait, you're right.”

Frank looked even more confused, “What's the difference...?”

“A Christian band will have most of their songs be about religious things, or at least have a lot of references to religious things. While a band with Christians in it is _practically_ secular, except they won't sing about anything too bad and will occasionally have religious elements to it.” Ray explained.

“Also, bands with Christians in it totally count as Christian bands to the parental peoples.” Gerard added.

Mikey rolled his eyes, “Which means, we are allowed to listen to bands like Anberlin because they're on the edge of Christian, even if they don't consider themselves a Christian band.”

“Didn't. They broke up.”

“Oh my God, stop reminding me. I'm still brooding, thank you very much.”

Gerard grinned, “Sorry, Mikes.”

“This is hurting my head, holy shit.” Frank said, rubbing his forehead for emphasis.

Pete shrugged, “Eh, you get used to it all after a while.”

“Plus, after a while you stop caring and just make dumb Bible jokes.”

“Bible jokes? Yep, that's it, I'm definitely surrounded by losers.”

Gerard grinned and slapped Ray on the knee repeatedly, “Or dumb Christian _pickup lines_! Those are my favorite.”

Ray looked Gerard in and said with a completely serious expression, “You float my ark.”

Gerard rested his hand on Ray's cheek, “You are perfect, except with all the sin.”

Ray leaned in slightly closer, “I believe one of my ribs belongs to you.”

Gerard let his hand slip to the back of Ray's neck, “Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Gilead.”

Ray moved his hand down Gerard's chest and shifted even closer, “Bathsheba had nothing on you.”

Gerard bit his lip and leaned closer to Ray, “I just don't feel called to celibacy.”

“What the fuck is happening.” Frank whispered, making Ray laugh and pull away from Gerard.

“It's this game that we play occasionally. Well, usually we just say 'honey, I love you,' but Gerard mentioned Christian pickup lines, so we did that.”

Frank looked at them in confusion, “What's the purpose of the game exactly?”

“We try to get as close to each other as possible and whoever pulls away first loses.” Gerard replied.

“Yeah, but Gerard and I like, never pull away because we just don't give a fuck. Dallon once actually _made_ us stop because we were practically making out.” Ray added.

“I guess they just can't handle my super-queerness and your vaguely-queerness.”

Ray laughed, “'Vaguely-queerness?' I'll take it.”

“I'll show you 'vaguely-queer.'” Pete grinned, then pulled Mikey closer and kissed him.

Gerard rolled his eyes and groaned, “Gross. Groossss. You guys are disgusting. _Booo_.”

Mikey flipped Gerard off while still kissing Pete, and Gerard continued booing at them. Pete pulled away and laughed, “You're just jealous because you don't know what kissing is like.”

“No, I just hate Mikey so much that I don't want him to enjoy himself, ever.”

“You're the worst, Gerard.” Mikey said.

“Oh my god, I hate you so much.”

Mikey grinned, “Love you, too.”

“Wait, where are your parents? I haven't seen them at all tonight.” Frank asked.

“They're at the grown up Christmas party, because they don't want to mingle with us kids.” Mikey said, then Gerard added, “Plus, they probably want to deal with five teenage boys for as little time as possible.”

“That's understandable, we're annoying as fuck.” Pete said, nodding his head in agreement.

“Oh! Speaking of annoying as fuck!”Mikey turned towards Frank, then continued, “I have a very important question to ask you that will determine whether or not you are still allowed to be our friend.”

“Uhm... okay?” Frank looked at Mikey with confusion and concern in his eye.

“Okay... what is your opinion of walnuts?” Mikey asked with a completely straight face.

“My what?”

“Your opinion of walnuts.”

“I... I don't know? They're alright, I guess.”

Mikey nodded his head, “I guess that will do as a suitable answer.”

Frank looked around at the four of them, “Why...?”

Ray shrugged, “Don't ask me, that's just Mikey and Gerard being weird.”

Frank looked at Gerard quizzically, and Gerard also shrugged, “I can't remember how it started, to be honest.”

“I'm pretty sure Gee was just bored.”

“Yeah, something like that.”

Mikey turned to look at Gerard, “Speaking of walnuts and boredom, you still need to draw me walnut president.”

“I'm not going to do that Mikey.”

“Please? You have to.”

Gerard squinted at him, “Why do I have to?”

“Because _he_ _cares about_ _your opinion_.”

“You are a fucking idiot I'm not gonna draw walnut president.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Can you at least draw the glittery, pissed off ghost that now haunts Frank?”

“Wait wha-”

Gerard groaned, interrupting Frank, “Ugh, fine. One sec, I'll be right back.”

Gerard got up and walked to his room, laughing when he heard Frank say, “I don't want to be haunted by a glittery ghost.” Followed by Mikey saying, “Too bad, motherfucker.”

He rummaged around his room until he found a pen and a blank piece of paper. He quickly drew Mikey's ghost, then covered the piece of paper in glitter glue and walked back out to the living room.

“Here's your ghost, nerd.” Gerard said, handing the piece of paper over to Mikey.

“Oh my god, thank you. It's beautiful, nerd.”

“I'm not a nerd. You're the family nerd, nerd.”

“Gerard, you're nerdier than me and you know it.”

Gerard grinned, “Okay, that's true. But, at least my D&D character is cooler than yours.”

“Fuck you, Tavern is the best.”

“Nope, Daisy is the best. Have you _seen_ her stats? She is a goddamn _monster_.”

“Uhm, guys, you're forgetting the most important person here: Tsunn. Tsunn is the coolest.” Pete said.

Ray groaned, “God, don't even remind me. Tsunn was the fucking worst, I'm glad we killed him.”

“But is he really dead?” Pete asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes. Yes he is. We killed him and then cut off his head _and_ his dick. He is incredibly dead.”

“But he is never truly dead... He will live forever... You didn't kill him, you just released his soul. He now roams free through the lands, waiting for the perfect moment to reappear. If you listen closely at night, you can hear the call of the Tsunn echo throughout the world.”

“ _Ayy lmao_.” Mikey whispered, then burst into laughter.

“Wait, you guys play D&D? That's awesome.” Frank said with a grin.

“Of course we play D&D, we're fucking losers.” Ray laughed.

“But, at least we're losers together.”

“That's true.” Ray nodded, then continued, “I basically only hang out with you so I can practice my DMing skills.”

“DMing?” Frank asked.

“Dungeon Master-ing skills. I'm basically their God and control all of their fates.”

“He's a fucking dick DM, too. Like yes, we get it, we're going up against a huge fucking monster that will destroy us. No need to count how many six sided die you're using _out loud_.”

Ray grinned and giggled, “But that's the _fun_ part.”

“You're a terrible, wrathful God.”

“Thank you... thank you so much.”

Mikey leaned his head on Pete's shoulder, “Frank, you should play with us sometime. We can make you a character and help you figure everything out and shit.”

“Yeah, I mean we're also relatively new to it, so we can figure shit out with you. It'll be great.”

Frank shrugged, “Yeah, why not? I mean, I have literally no idea how to play and I know none of the rules, but how bad can it be?”

“Cool! We'll tell ya whenever we're gonna be playing again.” Gerard grinned.

“Oh! Speaking of nothing in particular, I just remembered something.” Mikey got up and ran out of the room, leaving the other four confused.

Ray looked at Gerard and raised a questioning eyebrow. Gerard shrugged in reply, then look at Pete quizzically, who just returned the look with an equally confused one of his own.

“So, uh, I take it none of you know what he's doing either?” Frank asked.

“Nope, got no clue.” Gerard replied.

“Which is weird, because you know everything about Mikey.”

“And everything he does.” Ray added.

Pete blushed, “Yeah, that's true.”

“Ooh what have you and Mikey been up to, Wentz?” Ray grinned, nudging Pete with his foot.

“Nothing.”

“I totally walked in on them about to do the diddily do.” Gerard whispered.

“Oh my god.” Pete grabbed a pillow and buried his face into it.

Ray grinned, “Holy shit, really?”

“Yeah, really. It was terrible.”

“It's not like we were actually in the middle of having sex.”

“Yes, but it still isn't fun walking in on your brother making out with someone while on top of him and like, grinding on each other and shit.”

“Oh god, what are you talking about?” Mikey asked, walking back into the living room and holding a large bag.

“Your sex life. Congratulations on actually having one!” Ray laughed.

Pete looked up from the pillow at Mikey, “It was Gerard.”

Mikey glared at Gerard, “You suck. And to think I was gonna give you all Christmas gifts.”

“Oh! Oh, I just remembered something. I also totally have Christmas gifts for you guys.” Gerard said, moving to get up again.

Ray shook his head and laughed, “Well, fuck. I thought I would be the only one bringing gifts today.”

“Shit, me too.”

“So, uh, I take it we all brought gifts? 'Cause I also brought gifts.” Frank said.

“Yeah, I believe we all did, Frank. But, I have to grab mine from my room. Gimme a sec.” Gerard left the living room and headed back to his room to get the gifts. He always was really awkward when it came to gift giving. He never knew what to get, and whenever he did think of something it usually was way out of his price range. To be fair, his price range was roughly twenty dollars for everyone he knew, so basically everything was out of his price range. He usually just ended up going for the artistic route- everyone loves getting art, plus everyone automatically assumes it takes a lot of time and energy when really he can usually finish something presentable in an hour.

Gerard grabbed the gifts, that were sitting on his bed, and went back to the living room. Mikey and Pete were sitting on the couch now and Gerard groaned, “Dude, you guys stole my seat.”

Mikey shrugged, “Eh, I don't care. You can sit on the floor. Or on Frank's lap.”

“Or I could sit on _your_ lap.”

“No, I don't want you to sit on me.”

“But you stole my seat, it's totally fair.”

“No, you suck.”

Ray rolled his eyes, “Oh my god... Gerard, just sit on Frank already.”

Gerard crossed his arms, “What if Frank doesn't want me to sit on him?”

“Nah, it's okay. You can sit on me.”

Gerard blushed, “I- uh, okay.”

Frank motioned for Gerard to sit on his lap, and Gerard walked over to him awkwardly.

“Are you sure, I mean-”

“Oh my god, just sit down.” Frank grabbed Gerard's hand and yanked him onto the armchair. Gerard yelped as he fell onto Frank, arm waving wildly and accidentally smacking Frank across the head. He repositioned himself so they both were comfortable and said, “There, I'm sitting. Happy?”

“Yes, I am happy. Now, give me your gifts, nerd.” Frank reached for the gifts that were on Gerard's lap, but Gerard batted his hand away.

“Stop, you don't know which one is yours. You just grabbed Mikey's.”

“Why is Mikey's the biggest?”

“Because I felt like it. Now, this one is yours.” Gerard handed Frank his gift and started chewing on his lip nervously as Frank opened it. He hoped Frank would understand the personal meaning behind the gift and wouldn't just think he was being cheap.

Frank tore off the gift wrapping and threw it onto the ground, then proceeded to examine the gift in his hands.

“...Cold Hard Want?”

“House of Heroes latest album. This is step two in my brilliant plan to get you into the Christian alternative rock scene.”

Frank laughed, “Thanks, I'm sure I'll cherish this for the rest of my life. Also, I may have also gotten you music.”

Gerard grinned, “Really? Will I be burned at the stake for listening to it?”

Frank grinned back at him, “Probably.” He said, then added, “I just hope I don't accidentally get you in trouble.”

Gerard waved him off, “I'm sure it'll be fine. I have mastered the art of hiding shit from my parents.”

“That's true, we're sneaky as _fuck_.” Mikey added.

“Probably too sneaky, to be honest.”

“Shh, we are the perfect amount of sneaky.”

Frank laugh, then moved so he could reach into his coat pocket and grab Gerard's gift. He also pulled out three bags of candy and threw them to Ray, Pete, and Mikey, saying, “Uh, sorry. Didn't really know what to get you guys, so I hope candy is fine.”

Pete grinned, “Candy is always fine.”

“Sick, that's good. Anyway, Gerard, your gift is just like... a mixtape? Kinda? Like, it's just a CD with a bunch of bands that you're totally missing out on because you're only allowed to listen to Christian music.” Frank said as Gerard looked the CD over. It had a track list handwritten on the back, and Gerard smiled at Frank's messy handwriting.

“I put as much as I could on it. It was actually pretty hard to put together, since deciding which songs from each band would be the best to show you is fucking _hard_. Also, I wanted to make sure to pick songs that I figured you would like.”

Gerard smiled at him, “Thank you, I'm sure you picked fantastic songs, Frankie.”

Frank grinned and wrapped his arms around Gerard, “I'm glad you like it, Gee.”

Gerard leaned into Frank, “Of course I like it. I probably would like anything you gave me.”

“What if he gave you the haunted face thing that we gave him?” Pete asked.

Gerard rolled his eyes, then threw his gift to Pete, “I would sneak it in your room as punishment. But shut up and open your present.”

Pete grinned at him, then began tearing open the gift as Gerard threw Mikey his gift. Mikey gave Gerard a questioning look and Gerard rolled his eyes, “Just open it already. It matches Pete's gift.”

Mikey gave him another questioning look as Pete started laughing hysterically. Mikey turned his attention towards Pete, and blushed crimson when he saw what Pete was holding.

“Gerard, why the fuck is Pete holding lube?”

“Merry Christmas!” Gerard grinned.

“Gee, what the hell did you get _me_?”

“Just open your gift and you'll find out.”

“No, tell me first.”

“No, open it.”

Oh my god- Mikey, would you just open it already? It's not gonna bite, probably.” Ray said, holding back laughter.

Mikey muttered something under his breath, then started opening his gift slowly. After a little bit of Mikey opening his gift gingerly, Frank groaned, saying, “Jesus, hurry up. It's probably not gonna be too bad, dude.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, but tore through the rest of the wrapping paper. He groaned and glared at Gerard, “Condoms and lube? Seriously?”

“What? Safe sex is best sex. I'm just trying to be a good older sibling, especially now that I know you might actually be having sex in the near future.”

Pete blushed and buried his face in a pillow as Ray burst into laughter beside them. Mikey hid his face in Pete's shoulder, and Gerard started giggling, “You'll thank me later, trust me.”

Suddenly, Gerard heard the front door open and his parents walking in. He froze and whisper yelled, “Hide the fucking lube and condoms.” at Mikey. Pete quickly grabbed the condoms from Mikey and hid them under the pillow he was hiding with the lube.

Their parents walked into the living room together, and Donna grinned, “Hey, boys! I didn't realize the three of you were coming over tonight. Do you need anything?”

“No, we're fine, mom. Thanks.” Mikey replied, looking slightly uncomfortable.

“Alright, just making sure. How long have you been home? Sorry we're late, though. The party went on longer then we realized.”

Gerard replied this time, “That's fine, mom. But, we've only been here for like twenty minutes.”

Frank laughed, “Dude, it's been like an hour.”

“What? No it hasn't!”

“Yes, it definitely has.”

“Oh jeez, I was totally off. I'm really terrible with time, sorry.”

Frank ran his hand down Gerard's back, sending shivers up his spine, “No need to apologize. I get that, I'm also pretty terrible with time.”

“Okay, well, if you need anything I'll be in my room.” Donna said.

Mikey smiled at her, “Thanks, mom.”

She smiled at them, then turned and left the room. Ray let out a laugh and said, “Do you think she saw the condoms?”

Mikey elbowed him in the gut, “Shut up, what if she hears you?”

Ray elbowed him back, “Don't worry, she didn't hear.”

Yeah, plus we could always play dumb and pretend we have no idea what she's talking about.” Gerard added.

Mikey nodded, “That is true.”

“Again, you guys are sneaky as fuck.”

Gerard grinned at Ray, “That is also true. But, hey, do you guys want to go to my room? It's further away from our parents room, so we won't have to talk as quietly.”

“Yeah, sure. Plus, you have a nice blanket, Gee. Your bed is kinda shitty, but your blanket is soft as fuck.” Ray said as he stood up and stretched.

“Okay, that's true. But it is not the worst bed I have had.”

“Yeah, like at least he has a bed. For a while it was just a large pile of pillows arranged in a nest-like fashion on the floor.” Mikey laughed, getting up with Pete.

“That actually got comfy after a while.”

“That's because your sleeping habits are literally the worst, Gee. Anyway, off to your room. Before we start talking about all your shitty sleeping circumstances.”

Gerard grinned, “Good plan.”

 


	8. Ecclesiastes 2:2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Help me think of a plan to get Gerard and Frank together.”
> 
> Pete laughed, “Are you gonna try to play matchmaker with those two?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!! Told y'all I wouldn't be gone for too long lmao but i hope all y'all like the chapter

Mikey hadn't been this good in a long time.

It wasn't that he had been particularly bad, he just hadn't been, well, _good_.

But, ever since Mikey got with Pete he had been so much better. He thought it wouldn't make much of a change, they had already been best friends, but something about the slight shift from “best friends” into “boyfriends” just made everything seem so much... _better_.

It was the small things, Mikey thought. The things that most people, not even Gerard, would notice- or even think about looking for. It wasn't only because they weren't open about their relationship, just all the differences were very small, things only Mikey and Pete would notice. Not counting all the kissing, of course. It was obvious to anyone who actually knew they were in a relationship that they would make out literally whenever they had a chance. Every time Pete came over Gerard would lock himself in his room and turn his music up all the way- which, to be fair, was how he spent most days anyway- so he could easily ignore the two teenage boys and any possible noises they made.

Not that they had had sex yet- both of them were too scared to initiate anything after Gerard had walked in on them. Mikey was almost happy about this, though. Not that he didn't want to sleep with Pete, he just wasn't sure if he was completely ready for that sort of thing yet.

He definitely did want to have sex with Pete, though. He was just... nervous. Really fucking nervous. He wouldn't know what to do and, even though Pete also wouldn't know what to do, he was scared he would embarrass himself. For now, he just didn't let things go too far when they were making out, and they both seemed fine with this. He liked what they currently had and didn't really feel the need to go any further yet.

Christmas passed and the youth group's New Year's Eve lock-in was approaching quickly. Mikey was excited, the lock-in was always his favorite youth group event; It had the fun of and social interaction of youth group, without the judgment and teachings. It was just... fun.

Plus, this way Mikey could “accidentally” fall asleep on Pete and no one would really question it. It happened most years anyway, so it wouldn't be unusual. Obviously he wouldn't do anything _too_ bad with Pete, he wasn't an idiot. But, if he found himself alone with Pete in a secluded place, he wouldn't be opposed to a little making out. Or a lot of making out. Really, he was always down for making out with Pete.

On this note of making out, Mikey really needed to get Gerard and Frank to make out. Seeing this little dance of romantic tension and teenage hormones made his head hurt, and he just wanted them to fucking _kiss_ already. They both obviously liked each other, it was just their mutual idiocy that made them not get together yet.

Mikey had to think of a plan- Probably something absolutely ridiculous that wouldn't actually work, but he wouldn't care because it would involve doing something dumb with Pete, probably. Okay, maybe he was just looking for an excuse to do something dumb with Pete, but if it meant getting Gerard to stop being an idiot for 5 minutes and just kiss Frank, that was alright.

Mikey was currently with Pete, lying on Pete's bed listening to music and talking about various things. Mikey turned on his side and poked Pete in the face. Pete stopped talking and turned his head towards Mikey, raising his eyebrow in a questioning manner.

“What?” Pete asked.

“Help me think of a plan to get Gerard and Frank together.”

Pete laughed, “Are you gonna try to play matchmaker with those two?”

“Of course I am! It's so annoying watching them pine after each other, but not do anything. Like, they need to stop staring at each other lovingly and make out already.”

“Okay, I'll help you, Mikeyway. But, I do think it's weird that you're trying so hard to get your brother laid.”

“Not necessarily 'laid,' I just want him to stop being a lonely idiot.”

“This will just make him an idiot with a boyfriend.”

“Which is much better, trust me. All he does nowadays is mope around in his room while holding the goddamn elephant toy and listening to Frank's mixtape on repeat.”

“Does he seriously do that?”

“Yes. I mean, it's not like the music is _bad_ , I just don't feel like listening to the same 30 punk songs constantly, you know?”

“That is understandable.” Pete sat up, then continued, “So, how do you plan on getting them together?”

Mikey shrugged, “Not sure, that's why I was asking for your help.”

“Lock them in a room together and don't let them out until they have talked about their feelings?”

“Nah, I don't think that would work with Gerard- it takes him a really long time to even slightly hint that he might _possibly_ like someone. We gotta take it a step further.”

“Lock him in a room with Frank, but this time Frank is naked?”

“How are we gonna get Frank naked?”

“We gotta burn all his clothes, Mikey.”

“Pete, that is a _terrible_ idea.”

“You were the one who asked me to help!”

“Yes, but we aren't going to _burn_ Frank's clothes.”

“Why do you insist on taking away all my fun, Mikey?”

“I don't take away _all_ your fun.”

Pete poked Mikey's stomach, “Yes, but you won't let me burn all of Frank's clothes.”

“That's because it's just a bad idea.” Mikey laughed.

“Wow, rude.”

“It's true!”

Pete rolled his eyes, “Fine, you're probably right. Well, fuck, how are we gonna do this if we can't burn Frank's clothes?”

“Lots of patience.”

“But I'm impatient.” Pete moved so he was straddling Mikey and rested his hands on Mikey's chest.

“How 'bout we don't think about your brothers love life, and think about other things.”

Mikey ran his hand up and down Pete's side and bit his lip, “What sort of other things?”

“You know... things.” Pete laughed softly and leaned down to kiss Mikey.

Mikey giggled softly before kissing Pete back. He let his hand trail up and down Pete's side, feeling him shiver underneath his touch. Pete slid his hand under Mikey's shirt and started kissing along his jaw. Mikey closed his eyes and tilted his head Pete kissed down his neck.

Pete pulled away and Mikey made a displeased noise. Pete laughed, “You know, whenever we make out I always wanna give you hickeys, but I know you would get in so much trouble if your parents saw.”

Mikey pushed the back of Pete's shirt up and rested his hand on the exposed skin there. He bit his lip and said, “Well, who says you have to leave hickeys in places my parents will see?”

Pete smirked and raised his eyebrows questioningly, “And what do you mean by that?”

Mikey sat up and pulled his shirt off. He still wasn't the most comfortable shirtless in front of other people, but he was getting used to it. Especially Pete, who basically was the only person- other then family members- who had seen him without a shirt on.

“I think you know what I mean.”

Pete licked his lips and ran his hand down Mikey's chest, then started slowly trailing kisses down his neck. Mikey laid back down, Pete laying in between his legs, and closed his eyes, tangling his fingers on Pete's hair.

Pete trailed further down and bite Mikey's collarbone. Mikey gasped softly and tugged on Pete's hair, making him laugh softly, his breath tickling Mikey's skin.

Mikey pulled on Pete's hair, “Don't laugh at me!”

“No, I think it's cute how much you want me!” Pete grinned.

“What makes you think I want you?”

“This.” Pete replied as he brushed his hand over Mikey's crotch.

Mikey gasped, then bit his lip to hold back any other noises he might make. He tugged on Pete's hair again and said, “Just go back to what you were doing.”

Pete chuckled, “Yes, sir.”

Pete moved up to kiss Mikey on the lips, then continued trailing bites and kisses down his chest. Mikey let his eyes slip shut, letting out soft noises and savoring the feeling of Pete's lips on his skin. He knew his chest would be covered in marks by the time Pete was done. It excited him knowing that he would have proof of this happening other then just the lingering feeling.

Pete was right, Mikey did want him. He wanted him a _lot_ , and Pete seemed to notice this, starting to palm Mikey through his jeans. Mikey gasped, pushing up into his touch, and Pete grinned up at him.

Pete went to unbutton Mikey's jeans, but Mikey stopped him, saying, “Wait, what if your parents walk in?”

“Don't worry, they aren't home. Won't be for a while.”

Mikey squinted at him suspiciously, “Why do I get the feeling you planned this?”

Pete laughed, “It's not like I could predict how you would react, I just figured it would be smart to invite you over when my parents aren't home, you know.... just in case.”

Mikey laughed, “Just in case what, exactly?”

“Just in case this happened.” Pete unbuttoned Mikey's pants then pulled them all the way off.

Now Mikey was starting to get nervous. He was painfully hard and basically naked, yet Pete was fully clothed and seemingly confident as he held himself over Mikey, looking down at Mikey with lust in his eyes. Mikey chewed on his bottom lip, attempting to not make eye contact with Pete. Which was quite hard, considering his face was only a few inches away.

Pete seemed to notice Mikey's discomfort and put his hand on his cheek comfortingly, saying, “We don't have t do anything if you don't want to.”

Mikey leaned up and kissed him quickly, then replied quietly, “If you stop now I will murder you. I just- take your pants off, Wentz.”

Pete laughed, “Yeah, okay, Way. Demanding much?”

“Shut up and get naked already.”

Pete grinned and kissed him, then sat up and pulled off his shirt. He started taking off his pants next, but they got stuck half way down. He huffed out in annoyance and Mikey started laughing.

“Are your pants fucking stuck?”

“No... maybe.... yes.”

“Holy shit, this is the best thing ever.”

“Don't make fun of me, dude. This sucks.”

“No, this is _hilarious_.”

Pete hit Mikey's leg, “Stop laughing at me.”

Mikey just started laughing more, and Pete rolled his eyes and continued trying to get his pants off.

“You know this would be much easier if you helped, instead of just laughing at me.”

Mikey grinned at him, “But this is so much more fun.”

“You're the worst.”

“You know you love me.” Mikey winked.

“Yeah, yeah...” Pete muttered. He finally got his pants off and pushed Mikey back down on the bed.

“You're a dick.” He said, his face only a few inches away from Mikey's.

Mikey smirked and Pete leaned down to kiss him. He started kissing along Mikey's jaw, then whispered against his skin, “Liked you being all demanding and shit.”

Mikey gasped as Pete bit just below his ear, then tugged on Pete's hair roughly and said, “Hey, nowhere noticeable.”

Pete kissed the spot softly and replied, “Sorry, Mikey.”

“It's okay, I just... don't want my parents finding out.”

“Yeah, I get that. I don't want my parents finding out either. At least, not like this.”

“Exactly, I don't want them to find out because of a hickey. That'd be stupid. Except gee probably would know how to cover it up 'cause he's good with makeup-”

“Oh my god, don't bring your brother up in this sort of situation.”

Mikey laughed, “Sorry.”

“You should be. Now, where was I...” Pete kissed Mikey again, letting his hand trail down Mikey's chest. He pushed Mikey's underwear down- somewhat clumsily, since he was only using one hand- and slowly wrapped his fingers around Mikey's dick. Mikey moaned softly and pushed up into Pete's hand, encouraging him to continue.

Pete kissed Mikey as he began jacking him off, slowly at first but building up speed. Mikey bucked up into his hand and moaned into his mouth. Pete trailed kisses down his neck and Mikey held onto him tightly as he thrust into Pete's hand.

Only a few minutes had passed before Mikey was coming all over Pete's hand, making him feel kinda stupid for coming so quickly. But, he could think about that later. Right now he was busy rolling them over and returning the favor.

It felt a little weird jacking someone else off, but Mikey figured he would get used to it. Plus, if a little weirdness meant he got to hear the noises Pete was making, it was totally worth it.

Next thing Mikey know, Pete was moaning loudly as he came. They both collapsed, panting heavily and ignoring the stickiness between them.

Pete breathed out a laugh and said, “Holy shit.”

“Yeah, holy shit.” Mikey grinned at Pete, then kissed him softly.

\-------

“Operation: Burn Frank's Clothes” had quickly turned to “Operation: Spill Soda on Frank's Clothes,” a much safer and easier plan. Pete was slightly disappointed about this, but Mikey had to remind him that it was dangerous and they would get in a lot of trouble.

Mikey didn't really expect the plan to work, considering the “plan” was just for Pete to “accidentally” spill soda all over Frank and hope he took his shirt off in front of Gerard. Even if it didn't work- which it probably wouldn't- it would mean Gerard would see a wet and sticky Frank, which would make him whine to Mikey about how attractive he was for the next month.

Maybe this wasn't the best plan.

But, there was no going back. Mikey could deal with the possibility of Gerard going on about how hot Frank was, because maybe, just maybe it would make him _finally_ do something about his feelings for Frank.

It was the day of the lock-in and Mikey and Pete were sitting together in the youth room. They were talking about their plans when Ray came up and sat beside them. He looked at them suspiciously and asked, “What are you two planning?”

Pete smiled innocently, “Nothing.”

Ray rolled his eyes, “I know you're planning something, you both have that evil glint in your eyes.”

“We're gonna try and get Gee and Frank together.” Mikey replied with a grin.

“Fucking finally.” Ray laughed, “What are you gonna do?”

“Our plan is basically 'get Frank shirtless in front of Gerard.'” Mikey replied.

“How is that gonna work?”

“We basically don't know.”

“I kinda just want to pour soda all over Frank.” Pete giggled.

“You guys are terrible at scheming.”

“Hey! I take offense to that!”

“-But, I do think it'd be amusing to see Gerard's reaction to Frank being shirtless.”

Mikey giggled, “It will be hilarious.”

“What will be hilarious?” Gerard asked, walking up to them.

“We're planning on throwing glitter on Dallon when it hits midnight.” Ray replied quickly.

“Ooh, good plan. I actually brought glitter, just in case.”

Ray squinted at Gerard suspiciously, “Why did you bring glitter?”

“Just. In. Case.”

“Hey, Gee, is Frank here?” Mikey asked.

“Oh, no. But, he's on his way.” Gerard replied as he pulled out his phone and looked at a text.

“Are you texting him right now?”

“...Maybe.”

“Oh my god, you're so in love with him.”

Gerard slapped Mikey's arm, “Shush, I am not in love with him.”

“Yeah, you totally are. You should like, declare your love for him at midnight.”

“I'm not gonna declare my love for him at midnight because I am not in love with him.”

“Not in love with who?” Frank asked, suddenly coming up behind Gerard. Gerard made a surprised noise and started tugging at his hair.

“Frank! You're here!”

“I said I would be.” Frank laughed.

“Yeah I, uh- yeah, duh, 'course you're here.” Gerard laughed nervously and looked at the floor.

“Oh, Gee, feel my pants. They feel so nice.” Frank grabbed Gerard's hand and put it on his leg, practically making Gerard feel him up.

Gerard turned crimson and stuttered out, “Oh, uh, yeah. They do feel nice.”

“I know right? They're like... leather or some shit. But, they are so comfortable. I should like only wear leather from now on.”

“Oh, kinky.” Ray winked exaggeratedly at Frank.

“Hell yeah.” Frank high fived Ray, making Pete laugh and Gerard stare intently at the ground.

Mikey leaned over to Pete and whispered, “We barely have to do anything, they're just doing it all themselves.”

“What are you whispering about Mikey? Gay stuff?” Frank asked, grinning and wiggling his eyebrows.

“Oh, yeah, obviously. I was just asking Pete if he wanted to ditch you single losers and go make out in the bathroom.”

“Hey, I'm not a loser-”

“Yes you are, Frank. But anyway, we're gonna go make out now. Bye!” Pete got up and pulled Mikey after him. They both were giggling as they went into the bathroom together. Pete grinned at Mikey and said, “I bet ya they're gonna be smooching by the end of the night.”

“Oh, they totally will. It's kinda hilarious seeing them dance around each other like this.”

“Yeah, it really is. I bet your brother will really freak once he sees Frank half naked and sticky.”

“You make it sound way creepier than it is.”

Pete grinned, “That's my specialty.”

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes, “I know. But, how will we make sure he stays shirtless for the rest of the night? He probably will have a change of clothes.”

“Steal his bag?”

“Hm... that might be too obvious. We should only steal his shirt.”

“Okay, so, while he's distracted one of us will steal his shirt from his bag and hide it where he can't find it, right?”

“Sounds good. But, who will do what?” Mikey asked.

“I'm pretty distracting, I can do that.”

“Maybe we can also get Ray to do that.”

“Oh, good plan. We should fill him in on things.”

“Okay, I'll go get him. Wait here.” Mikey ran out of the bathroom and back to the main room. A lot more people had shown up, so it took him a few minutes to find Ray. He found him standing by the food table with Ashley. He waved a hello to Ashley, then turned to Ray and said, “I need you in the bathroom.”

“I thought you were making ou- I thought you were with Pete in the bathroom.” Ray replied.

“I was with Pete, but now we both need you.”

“What exactly will you be doing in said bathroom?” Ashley giggled.

Mikey winked at her, “Nothing important.”

“Mhm, sounds like fun.”

“It is. But really, Pete's waiting.”

Ray laughed and rolled his eyes, “Yeah, yeah. I'm coming.”

“You guys enjoy that.” Ashley grinned.

“We will.” Mikey pulled Ray towards the bathroom and locked the door behind him. Pete grinned at Ray and said, “Glad you could make it to our super secret meeting spot. We have new plans concerning the Frank and Gerard situation.”

Ray leaned against the door and crossed his arms, “Yeah, that's what I figured this was about. What are you gonna do?”

“Okay, so Pete will 'accidentally' spill soda all over Frank in hopes that he will take off his shirt. Then, while Pete's doing that I'll be stealing and hiding any extra clothes he has in his bag. Also, you can help with Pete's part, if you'd like.” Mikey explained.

“Oh man, this is gonna be fucking hilarious.” Ray laughed.

“I know! I can't wait!” Pete grinned and high fived Mikey.

“Well, come on. Lets do this thing!”

\-------

Mikey, Pete, Ray, Gerard, Frank, and Patrick were standing together in a circle when it happened. Pete left to get Mikey and himself a drink, which the three schemers knew meant that their plan was about to take action. They didn't really expect it to work, but it just seemed like a fun thing to do anyway.

Pete came back holding two large cups of soda. He gave Mikey a look, then “accidentally” tripped and poured the soda all over Frank's chest. Frank gaped at Pete and said, “Dude, what the fuck?”

Pete smiled sheepishly, “Shit, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to.”

“Yeah, okay, but I'm still fucking soaked.” He pulled off his shirt and sighed, “Can someone get me a towel or a napkin or something?”

“I'll get it.” Mikey replied, then left to steal Frank's shirt and to grab a towel. He came back just in time to see Gerard grab a napkin and wipe at Frank's chest. He stopped suddenly, as if just realizing he was rubbing Frank's chest, and let his hand linger where it was. Frank turned red and Gerard stuttered out an apology as he drew his hand away, looking at the ground in embarrassment. Pete winked at Ray, making Mikey laugh and Patrick look suspiciously between the three.

Frank laughed awkwardly and said, “I guess it was about time you saw me half naked and all sticky and wet.”

“What's that supposed to mean?” Pete asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I don't know, I just get gross a lot.”

“Do you people usually start rubbing your chest when you get like that?” Ray grinned and nudged Gerard, making him blush more and mutter something about he wasn't thinking.

Frank winked at Gerard, “I think this was the first.”

“Hey guys, five minutes 'til midnight” Dallon announced.

Gerard seemed to snap out of his Frank related daze and grinned eagerly, “I gotta go get the glitter from my bag.”

“I'll come with you.” Frank said, then added, “I uh, also should get another shirt. From my bag, ya know?”

“Yeah, that's probably a good plan.” Gerard was very obviously trying to _not_ look at Frank, and it was hilarious. He would look at the floor, the ceiling, just past Frank, but wouldn't look directly at him. It made it more obvious that he liked Frank, because if he didn't then he wouldn't care about seeing a shirtless Frank.

After the two had walked away, Mikey laughed and handed Pete the shirt he had stolen from Frank's bag. He said, “I didn't know what to do with it.”

Pete shrugged and put it on. He grinned at Mikey, saying, “How do I look?”

Patrick started laughing, “I knew you guys planned that.”

“Of course we planned it!” Ray grinned, “Just a harmless New Years Eve prank that will build sexual tension between those two.”

“Yep, that's what I thought. Also, Pete told me that he and Mikey were trying to get them together, so it was pretty obvious.”

“You told him?” Ray asked.

“Yeah, of course I did. I tell Patrick everything.”

“It's true, I know about everything that happens in Pete's life.” Patrick winked at Mikey, “Everything.”

Mikey blushed and shoved Pete, “Dick.”

“What? Is it really surprising that I told him?”

“Okay, no it isn't. But still!”

“Ooh, what happened between you two?” Ray smirked.

“Absolutely nothing sexual, that's what.”

Mikey slapped Pete's arm, “Shh, what if someone hears you?”

“Hey, I said we _didn't_ do anything sexual!”

“Pete, you and I both know what that meant.”

Pete grinned, “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

Mikey shoved Pete, making him laugh. Ray shook his head and mutter, “Absolutely ridiculous. As Dallon said, “One minute, guys!”

Pete grabbed Mikey's hand and squeezed it, smiling, “Almost the new year!”

“I know! Hopefully it won't be too shitty.”

“Yeah, I guess we'll see.”

People started counting down and Mikey watched Pete the whole time. He couldn't feel happier knowing that he would be starting off the new year hand-in-hand with Pete. He felt so content and happy in that moment, excited for all the possibilities of the new year. All the things that could happen between him and Pete.

Everyone yelled out, “Happy New Year!” and Mikey could feel that it would be a good year.

Right as the clock struck midnight, Gerard and Frank threw glitter all over Dallon, covering his entire body. Dallon screamed and tried wiping it off, but to no use. The more he tried shaking it off, the more it spread all over him. He glared at Frank and Gerard, but they were just laughing hysterically, Frank leaning against Gerard and laughing into his shoulder- both of them also covered in glitter.

Mikey started laughing too, but he felt Pete tugging on his hand and heard him whisper, “Come with me.”

Pete lead Mikey to a secluded room and pushed him against a wall. Mikey giggled and whispered, “What do you think you're doing, Wentz?”

“New Years kiss, obviously.” Pete grinned, then leaned up and kissed Mikey softly. Mikey closed his eyes and rested his hands on Pete's waist as they kissed.

They stood there kissing for a few minutes, before Tyler walked in and yelled, “What the hell?”

The two boys pulled away quickly and turned towards Tyler, red faced and hearts beating quickly.

“I, uh- we were just...” Mikey stuttered out, trying to find the words to calm Tyler down.

“You were just what? Making out? I thought you were straight, Pete, what are you doing kissing another dude? Are you also a fag?”

Mikey felt like he had just been slapped in the face. He glanced at Pete and saw the anger boiling up in his eyes.

“What did you just fucking say?” Pete looked like he was about to punch Tyler, and Mikey wondered if he should hold him back.

“I said, are you a goddamn faggot too?”

Pete lunged at Tyler, but Mikey grabbed his arm, trying to pull him back.

“Let go of me!” Pete yelled.

“No! This will only make things worse for you!”

Dallon, Ray, and Gerard ran in, Dallon asking, “What's going on in here?”

“Mikey and Pete are like... are like dating or something. I just saw them making out!” Tyler replied.

Dallon turned to Mikey and Pete, “Is this true?”

Mikey nodded nervously and Pete glared at the floor, Mikey still holding his arm like a vice.

Dallon sighed and rubbed at the bridge of his nose. Some more people- Frank, Josh, Ashley, and Patrick- ran in. Dallon groaned and pulled out his phone, “I'm gonna call your parents, tell them what happened.”

“No! You can't!” Pete tried to pull out of Mikey's grip, to no use.

“What else am I supposed to do, Pete? A fights about to break out in here, I need to tell your parents.”

“Please, you can't do this...” Mikey pleaded.

“No, tell them! I don't want fags like them staying here.”

Gerard glared at Tyler and slowly approached him, saying, “What the fuck did you just call my brother, dickhead?”

Tyler shoved Gerard, “I called him a fag, cause that's what he is. What, are you a fag too?”

“Maybe I fucking am!” Gerard shouted, shoving Tyler back. Dallon ran over to them and pulled them apart. Gerard moved over to Mikey as Dallon said, “Enough! There's no reason for you to fight.”

“He's insulting Mikey!” Gerard was fuming, and Mikey felt like he was going to cry.

“I know, and that is not okay. Tyler shouldn't be insulting them-”

“But they're-”

Dallon glared at Tyler, “I don't care what they are, you shouldn't treat people like that, Tyler.”

“Are you saying that what they're doing is okay?”

“No, I'm not saying that. But, what you're doing is also not okay. 'Love your neighbor as yourself,' Tyler. Insulting people isn't very loving, now is it?”

Tyler crossed his arms and turned away from Dallon. Dallon sighed and shook his head, then turned back to Mikey and Pete, “I texted your parents, they're on their way here to pick you up. Now, Pete, Mikey, you do realize that what you were doing was also not okay, right?”

“I don't see why most people can kiss the people they love on New Years, but I can't.” Pete muttered angrily.

“You love me?” Mikey asked, wide eyed.

“I-” Pete started, but Tyler cut him off, saying, “It's not love, it's disgusting.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Frank strode over to Tyler and punched him hard in the face. Tyler stumbled back, holding his nose, and Dallon quickly walked over to Frank. He grabbed Frank's arm and pulled him to the door, muttering, “Okay, that's it. I'm separating you all.”

Josh went over to Tyler and asked, “Dude, are you okay?”

“No, I'm not okay! He punched me!”

“To be fair, you did deserve it.” Ashley mumbled.

Dallon sighed loudly, “It doesn't matter if he deserved it or not, Frank still shouldn't have done it. Frank, violence isn't the answer.”

“But it can be real satisfying.” Frank laughed.

“Frank!” Dallon exclaimed, “That shouldn't be your way of thinking, it can be dangerous. Now, you should leave, before you do anything else.”

Frank rolled his eyes and pulled away from Dallon's grip, “Fine, I don't want to be around homophobes anyway. Gee, call me later.”

Mikey watched as Frank stomped out of the room. Gerard was still hovering close behind him but now Mikey was holding onto Pete's hand like it was a lifeline. He felt like he was going to be sick, and next thing he knew Dallon was pulling Pete away from him. He tried to pull Pete back, but he seemed to have lost all his strength. Pete's hand slipped from his own and all he could do was stare vacantly at the spot where he used to be standing.

Gerard placed his hand on Mikey's shoulder and said, “Mikey, Mikey come on, lets go.”

Mikey nodded and let Gerard escort him out of the building and towards the car. He didn't really feel sad, just numb. Like he was void of all emotions. Tears started slipping down his cheek, but he didn't even notice. Nothing mattered anymore. He didn't care that he was crying, couldn't even feel it. Gerard hugged him tightly, whispering apologies into his ear, but he couldn't even feel that.

He was just numb.

\-------

Mikey had never felt this miserable in his whole life.

It had been a week since the New Years lock-in, and Mikey still had that empty feeling inside him, like something had been ripped from his chest.

But something had been ripped from his chest: he had lost his best friend.

When they had gotten home that night, their parents had flipped. He was basically everything- no phone, no computer, no youth group, no winter camp...

No Pete.

That was the worst. Mikey didn't give a fuck about youth group or social media or anything else he wasn't allowed to do anymore, he just wanted his best friend back. Gerard tried comforting him, but nothing worked. He still just felt so numb, and nothing could change that.

Mikey was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling blankly, when Gerard knocked on the door. Mikey mumbled a “Come in,” and Gerard slowly opened the door.

“Josh is here to see you.”

Mikey sat up and looked at Gerard questioningly, “The fuck does he want?”

Gerard opened the door more to show Josh standing with him. He waved sheepishly at Mikey and replied, “I wanted to say I'm sorry.”

“For what? Tyler being a complete dick?” Mikey laid back down and Gerard left them alone. Josh sighed and walked further into the room, closing the door behind him.

“Yes. I figured... I figured someone should. What he did was really fucking terrible, but he doesn't see it. I tried getting him to apologize but.... but he refused.”

Mikey scoffed, “Then why are you here?”

Josh sighed, “I don't know. I know me apologizing for what Tyler did won't change anything-”

“Yeah, it fucking won't. Thanks to him my life is probably ruined, so a goddamn apology is worth jack shit.”

“I know, I'm really fucking sorry. I completely understand why you're pissed at Tyler, he deserves it. He deserved getting punched in the face by Frank.”

Mikey laughed and sat back up, fully facing Josh, “That was pretty great.”

Josh shook his head and chuckled, “It kinda was. You know, usually I'd be defending Tyler to the grave, but in this situation he was totally wrong. He's pissed at me now since I didn't back him up.”

Mikey smiled softly, “Well, thanks for stopping by, I guess. I'm glad you aren't also a homophobic asshole- full offense to Tyler.”

Josh laughed, “Yeah, I'm pretty sure Ashley would beat me up if I said anything homophobic.”

Mikey raised his eyebrows, “Oh?”

“Yeah, she's like... bi? I think? Something like that. But she's always talking to me about LGBT rights and shit. It's kinda cool, actually. She always calls me out if I accidentally say something shitty, you know? Correcting me if I say something ignorant.”

“She sounds awesome, too bad Tyler isn't friends with her.”

Josh sighed again, “Yeah, too bad. I wonder how he'd react if he knew I had a gigantic crush on a bi girl.”

“Hm, good question. Probably something shitty?”

“Okay, that's probably true. Oh! Also, Pete says hi.”

“You've seen Pete?” Mikey asked quickly.

“Yeah, I think his parents just won't let _you_ go anywhere near him. I'm pretty sure Patrick has basically been living with him for the past week.”

Mikey started picking at a loose thread on his shirt, “Oh, okay... Did he uh- did he say anything else?”

“Just that he misses you a lot and that he wished he was the one who punched Tyler.”

Mikey chuckled softly, “I also wished I had punched Tyler. But, uh, how is he doing? Like, how does he look?”

“He looks basically like you- aka complete shit. But, he does have Patrick, so he will be okay. Obviously he'll still miss you a lot, but he won't get too bad.”

“Okay... I guess that's good. Thanks again for stopping by, Josh.”

Josh smiled, “No problem, Mikey.”

Josh turned to leave, but Mikey stopped him, saying, “Wait! Uhm, if you see Pete again, can you tell him that I'll get in touch the second I can, and that I also miss him a lot.”

“Yeah, of course, dude. See you later.”

“Yeah, see you later too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disclaimer: I don't actually think Tyler is like this. I feel like he's a little ignorant at some times, but I don't think he's flat out homophobic like he's portrayed as in this fic. I just thought the "homophobic asshole" thing fit him the best in the context of this fic.
> 
> [p.s. here's a pic of my dog Tammo ](http://i.imgur.com/2i2VRlY.jpg)


	9. Song of Solomon 1:2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh my god sorry this is late my computer was being Dumb so i had to retype a bunch of shit and then i was like ahhh and yeah but here it is now
> 
> also p.s. every time i say "billie joe armstrong" u should read it in a robotic voice because its hilarious okay that is all

Gerard hated seeing Mikey like this. He rarely left his room anymore and barely ate. Gerard wanted to help, but he knew there was nothing he could do.

It had been a little over a month since the New Years incident and Mikey still wasn't allowed to do anything. He was allowed to go to youth group now, but it just seemed to make things worse, since he was he could see Pete but he wasn't really able to talk to him without Dallon interrupting.

Gerard did at least want to try to help, so he made a sandwich and went into Mikey's room, hoping to get him to eat _something_. When he walked in, Mikey was laying face down on his bed. Gerard sighed and sat next to him, placing the sandwich on the nightstand. Mikey turned his head so he was looking at Gerard and mumbled, "What's that?"

"It's a sandwich. You need to eat, Mikey."

"Says you. When was the last time you ate, Gee?"

Gerard sighed again, "That doesn't matter, jut try to eat, okay?"

"At least I have an excuse." Mikey muttered as he sat up and reached across Gerard to get the plate with the sandwich on it, "I lost my best friend, what's your excuse?"

"My excuse is shut the fuck up and eat."

Mikey rolled his eyes and examined the sandwich, then put it down on the bed and lied back down. He looked down at his hands and said, "You know, Pete said he loved me."

"I know, I heard him."

"I didn't get to say it back."

"That's okay, you'll be able to tell him at some point."

"But what if I don't?" Mikey looked at Gerard with panic in his eyes, "Gerard, what if I don't get to tell him I love him back? Does he know I love him? Fuck, Gee, he doesn't know. He doesn't know and I'll never be able to tell him."

"Hey, hey don't say that. You'll be able to tell him, trust me. Maybe not now, but you will. I promise you will be able to tell him."

"But how? I'll never be able to get him alone long enough to tell him. I don't want it to be rushed, Gee. I want him to really know. Fuck, I won't be able to tell-"

"Okay, shut up." Gerard interrupted, "I'm like the queen of hopelessness and even I'm saying shut the fuck up. I will make sure that you get to tell him that you love him even if it's the last thing you do. You know why? Because this whole situation fucking sucks and there is nothing anyone can do, but if I can do this then that is something. You will be able to tell him you love him, Mikey. I'll make sure of it."

Mikey started sobbing and Gerard held him close, rocking him back and forth in his arms. They stayed like that for a long while, Gerard holding Mikey tightly as he sobbed into Gerard's shirt. Eventually Mikey pulled away from Gerard and wiped his eyes. He gave Gerard a sad smile and said, "Thanks, Gee. Sorry for soaking your shirt."

Gerard laughed softly, "Don't worry about it. I really should apologize, this shirt is fucking nasty. I have no idea how long I've been wearing it."

"Oh, gross. My face is covered in your filth now."

Gerard grinned, "You know that's right. If you had stayed longer, you would've been absorbed into the fabric with all the other shit."

Mikey was laughing now and shoved at Gerard, "Ew, you're so nasty. Go, leave, you're making my room dirtier by just being in here."

Mikey kicked at Gerard and he laughed, saying, "Fine, fine, I'm leaving." as he got up and left Mikey's room.

That was at least one problem solved. Well, solved as best as he could. Now there was the other problem: Frank.

Well, more accurately, the problem was that there were whispers around the youth group about the true nature of Frank and Gerard's relationship. Gerard knew that by now people had guessed he was queer, but he didn't understand why they thought he was with Frank. Just because two queer people were extremely close friends didn't mean they were dating. He didn't even like Frank.

Okay, maybe he liked Frank a little.

Or a lot.

Okay, he might possibly be completely head over heels for Frank, but who could blame him? Frank was... Frank was kind of amazing. Yes, sometimes he was kind of a dick, and yes, he did often make fun of Gerard's taste in music, but he was still amazing. It wasn't like Gerard thought Frank was perfect or something, he just thought Frank was amazing.

It was the day before winter camp and Frank was staying at Gerard's house for the night. He was a little nervous since this was the first time Frank had stayed over alone- plus, Gerard was just always nervous, but that was a completely different problem. Right now he was just trying to calm himself down as he waited for Frank to show up.

Gerard was listing the pro's and con's of doing his makeup when there was a knock on his door, followed by Frank walking into his room. He threw the lipstick he was holding across the room and leaned against his chair in attempts to seem casual, but just ended up falling over. He groaned and waved at Frank, saying, "'Sup."

Frank laughed and offered Gerard a hand, "Are you alright?"

Gerard pulled himself up and replied, "Yeah, I'm fine."

"Alright, just making sure. What was that thing you just threw?"

"What... what thing."

"You know what thing I was talking about, Gee." Frank walked in the direction of where Gerard had thrown the lipstick, then asked, "Was it a weird sex thing?"

"No! Of course not! I don't have any, uh, weird sex things."

Frank grinned at him and sat on the bed, "None? At all? Weird, you seem like the type."

Gerard blushed and sat beside Frank, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You just give off a kinky vibe. Also, Mikey said you were kinky at that sleepover we had a while back."

"Man, Mikey fucking sucks." Gerard laughed, "But... I might have weird sex things... just no weird sex objects."

Frank grinned and poked Gerard's arm, "I knew it! What sort of things?"

"You know... things."

Frank poked him again, "Come on, tell me! I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

Gerard coughed and turned crimson, making Frank giggle and say, "Or I could just list mine and you tell me which one's you also have."

"Yeah, fine. Whatever."

"Awesome!" Frank grinned, "Power play?"

Gerard looked at the ground and mumbled, "Maybe."

"Oh, you totally do. "Dom or sub?"

Gerard rolled his eyes and shoved Frank lightly, "It doesn't matter."

"But I'm curious! C'mon, just tell me! If it makes you feel better, I'm a dom."

Gerard laughed and raised his eyebrows, "And how do you know that?"

Frank winked, "I can tell. Now, come on, dom or sub? Top or bottom? Tell me, Gee. Teellll mee."

Gerard shoved Frank again, "Fine, fine! Just shut up! I'm a bottom, okay?"

Frank grinned widely, "Hah, we're perfect for each other!"

Gerard blushed and Frank went wide eyed, stuttering out, "I uh, I mean- Uhm, yeah..."

Gerard looked at the ground and Frank shook his head and started laughing. Gerard looked up at him questioningly and Frank just continued shaking his head and giggling.

"Why are you laughing?" Gerard asked.

"I have no fucking idea!" Frank fell backwards onto Gerard's bed, laughing hysterically. Gerard looked down at him and started giggling too. Frank pulled him down so they were laying next to each other, laughing uncontrollably.

A few minutes passed and Gerard started to calm down. He sat back up and poked Frank's stomach, "You're weird."

Frank pulled Gerard back down, making him yelp in surprise, and said, "No, you're weird." through giggles.

Gerard rolled his eyes, "In most situations that would be true, but right now you're the weird one."

Frank covered his face with his arm, still giggling, and said, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm laughing."

Gerard grinned at him, "You're really weird, Frankie."

"Whoops." Frank moved his arm and grinned back at Gerard.

Frank moved onto his side, propping himself up on his elbow, and looked down at Gerard. They were so close together and Gerard felt his heartbeat speed up, but he couldn't look away from Frank. He was just so pretty, and he looked really amazing looking down at Gerard like this.

Gerard wasn't sure how long they laid like that- probably no more then 30 seconds, but it felt like forever. Gerard eventually bit his lip and stuttered out, "D-do you want to watch a movie?"

Frank seemed to snap out of a trance and nodded, "Yeah, uh, sure. What movies do you have?"

"Uhm, we have Netflix?"

Frank sat up, "Alright, we can just browse and pick the first thing that looks remotely interesting."

Gerard grinned and sat up too, "Sounds great. That's what I usually do on Netflix anyway."

Gerard stood up to grab his laptop from his desk and Frank watched him, saying,"I mean, what else are you supposed to do on Netflix? They rarely have the movies you _actually_ want to see, but always have that weird foreign film that freaks you out but is good anyway."

Gerard laughed and sat back down next to Frank, "Okay, that's true. But goddamn are those weird foreign films always great. Like Troll Hunter and A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night, both great movies. You heard of them?"

"No, I haven't, but I'm sure you're right." Frank grinned.

"'Course I'm right. I know my shit."

"Yeah, of course you do." Frank giggled.

"Damn right I do." Gerard laughed, then got Netflix up. Frank leaned into his side and Gerard tried to ignore the warmth that Frank brought to him.

They were scrolling through for a little while, when Frank stopped Gerard and said, "Oh, I've heard that's good."

"Wait, do you mean The Way He Looks?"

"Yeah! My friend watched it and said it was cute."

"Okay, lets watch it then." Gerard clicked on it and, to Gerard's disappointment, Frank moved away slightly.

Gerard was getting invested in the movie- it really was adorable. He tried to ignore it when Frank moved back closer to him. Not that he didn't like the close proximity, he really did it was just he was still freaked out and extra paranoid from the New Years debacle. Yes, he was extremely into Frank, but he also was too scared of getting caught to actually do anything.

That fear didn't make this feeling go away. This feeling of Frank leaning into him, of Frank leaning closer into his side. This feeling that if Gerard looked at Frank right then he wouldn't be able to stop himself from kissing Frank.

Gerard spent the rest of the movie trying to control himself- trying to calm his rapid heartbeat. He really, really wanted to kiss Frank, but he still had a lingering fear that Frank didn't actually like him back. But that fear would never go away. Even if he fucking _married_ Frank it wouldn't go away. Gerard was just too afraid that no one actually liked him, it was practically ingrained into his brain that he was worth no ones love or attention.

He just didn't feel worthy of anything.

Next thing he knew, the movie was over. He finally risked a glance at Frank, only to find that Frank had fallen asleep on his shoulder. Gerard sighed and closed the laptop softly, trying not to wake Frank up. He just hoped that he would be able to fall asleep soon and wouldn't get restless or twitchy.

\----------

Gerard woke up the next morning to a sore back- which wasn't unusual- and Frank shaking him slightly.

"Hey, hey Gee. Wake up. We gotta get ready to leave, Gee." Frank was speaking loudly, but in a soft tone, as if he knew that Gerard was cranky in the mornings. Especially when he only had had an hour or so of sleep.

Fuck, he was exhausted. 

Gerard slowly sat up and rubbed at his eyes, mumbling, "I'm up, I'm up. God, what time is it? It's too early."

Frank giggled, "I know it's too early, but we gotta be at the church at 8:30 and it's already past when you probably should've gotten up."

Gerard groaned and fell back into a lying position, "Fuck, how long 'til we have to leave?"

"Uhm, probably ten minutes. I already took a shower."

Gerard looked at Frank suspiciously, "How long have you been up?"

"I got up around seven, but I figured I wouldn't wake you up yet. Don't want to get on your bad side, after all." Frank laughed.

"Jesus, how are you not dead? Seven is too fucking early to get up."

"That's just cause you're a homeschooler, dude. You don't have to get up at six on a daily basis."

"And that is one of the only good things about being homeschooled." Gerard sighed, then got out of bed. He looked down at what he was wearing and asked, "Can you tell I slept in this?"

Frank squinted at him questioningly, "Why?"

"I wanna know if I can get away with wearing it in public."

Frank shrugged, "It's kind of wrinkled, but other then that it's fine."

"Thank god, I don't feel like getting dressed. Also I packed all my clothes."

"Not all your clothes, right?" Frank laughed.

"Hah, no, of course not. I definitely have more then a duffel bag worth of clothes." Gerard laughed nervously.

"Yeah, obviously. But really you should get ready."

"Yeah, yeah, I will."

\----------

They arrived at the church a little before 8:30. Gerard was still exhausted, but at least now he had coffee, so he wasn't completely dead.

He was slightly dead, though, but no more dead then he usually was. And if he started singing loudly and terribly in between laughter on the car ride up then, well, everyone else could just deal.

Ray walked over to Frank and Gerard and grinned, "Hey! Did you guys come together?"

"Yeah, I needed a ride here so we just figured it'd be easier if I stayed the night before." Frank replied.

"Ah, that makes sense. We should definitely be in a car together, though. It'd be fun."

"And terrible for whoever is driving you." William laughed, walking up to the small circle, "Which will probably end up being me."

"No, I wanna go in Jon's van" Gerard said.

"You're too late, I'm pretty sure it's already been picked who's going in Jon's van. And by that I mean some of the guys already put all their stuff in his van."

"Damn, oh well. We can just drive with you, Bill." Ray grinned.

"How long is the drive anyway?" Frank asked.

William turned to Frank, "Oh! That's right! You've never been here before. It's about a five or six hour drive. We'll probably get there around lunch time."

"Okay, that's not too bad. I was afraid it was going to be a full day trip or something."

William shook his head and chuckled, "Nah, it's not too bad. Don't worry."

Dallon clapped his hands together loudly to get everyone's attention. They formed a circle in the middle of the parking lot and Dallon grinned at them all, then said, "Good morning! I believe everyone who signed up is here, so we'll be leaving in a few minutes. If you have to go to the bathroom, please do it now. I don't know how often we'll be able to stop, so it might be a while before you can. Now! On to who's in which car."

Gerard , Frank, and Ray did end up in William's car, which was fine with them. They basically just wanted to be in the same car, it didn't matter who was driving.

Gerard wanted to sleep, but realistically he knew that wouldn't happen. He'd be fine, though. He would be distracted easily, since he'd be with friends for the next few days. He would enjoy himself, goddammit. He would.

William shoved all their bags into his trunk, then slammed it shut and grinned, "You three ready?"

"Fuck yeah!" Ray grinned back and high fived William.

"Awesome! Lets go then."

They all got into the car- William driving, Ray sitting shot gun, and Frank and Gerard in the back- and drove off. Gerard leaned closer to Frank and whispered, "I hope you don't get car sick easily."

"Why?" Frank whispered back.

"You'll see."

The drive started off relatively peaceful. They all were still waking up, so the only sounds were the radio and the faint noise of cars driving by them. Gerard looked out the window and watched the scenery roll by. William and Ray were talking quietly up front and Gerard noticed that Frank was mirroring his own position.

Gerard decided that he would try to be social and poked Frank's arm, asking, "When did you fall asleep last night?"

Frank turned to Gerard, "Uh, partially through the movie. I didn't actually see how it ended. What about you?"

"Uhm, around 5."

"Shit, seriously? You must be exhausted."

Gerard shrugged, "I'm used to it."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I like... have trouble sleeping when it's dark out."

"Like a vampire?" Frank laughed.

Gerard grinned, "Yeah, like a vampire."

"Awesome. I mean, not awesome that you have trouble sleeping, just- you know, vampires are cool."

Gerard's grin widened, "Fucking true."

Gerard's hand was resting in the middle seat and Frank smiled at him shyly, then brushed their fingers. Gerard blushed and looked down at Frank's hand, wishing he could reach out and tangle their fingers together.

They continued chatting about various things, occasionally joining in with William and Ray's conversation. The car got louder and so did the radio. Soon, they were practically yelling at each other, but no one seemed to mind. The car was full of laughter and singing, so Gerard barely had room to think.

By the time they had arrived, they all were singing Hey Jude as loud as they could. Their car was the first to arrive, due to William's fast and reckless driving, so they all piled out and waited around for everyone else to show up.

Dallon came next, followed by Breezy, and then finally Jon. Kids were milling about, holding their bags and not really sure where to go. Pete and Patrick approached Gerard, Frank, Ray, and William, Pete waving and saying, "Yo! What's up guys?"

"I'm super exhausted." Gerard laughed. He noticed that behind Pete's smile, there was something sad in his eyes. Of course, Gerard knew what that was about: Mikey. The two hadn't been able to talk to each other for over a month and Gerard knew it was terrible for them both.

Pete, of course, just laughed and said, "When aren't you exhausted?"

"Exactly."

"You're crazy, Gerard."

Gerard shrugged, "I'm used to it."

William walked over to Dallon, leaving the five boys alone. Pete rubbed at the back of his neck nervously and asked, "So, uh, how has Mikey been?"

"He's uhm, he's doing okay... He does miss you a lot, though." Gerard replied, giving Pete a soft smile.

"Yeah, I miss him too." Pete sighed and Patrick wrapped his arms around Pete's waist and rested his chin on his shoulder. They walked away like that and Frank mumbled, "I feel really bad for them."

"Yeah, me too." Gerard sighed, "I just wish our parents weren't so fucking strict."

Frank leaned his head on Gerard's shoulder, "Yeah, that really sucks. I'm sorry you have to deal with that."

Gerard smiled at Frank, "It's okay, I've survived this long." He thought it was best to leave out the part where he barely had survived and was just hanging on by a thread.

Frank laughed, "That's true."

Eventually, they all went inside the lodge. Gerard always loved this place. It just gave off such a nice vibe, he couldn't help feeling relaxed.

Maybe he was just tired.

Gerard led Frank to the sleeping area and grinned at him, "We should share a bunk."

Frank laughed, "Yeah, okay."

Gerard's grin lessened and he nodded in the direction of one of the bunks. They both walked over to it and Gerard asked, "Top or bottom?"

"I thought that we already established that I'm a top-"

Gerard rolled his eyes and shoved Frank, "I meant which bunk you wanted, dick."

Frank laughed, "Yeah, yeah. I know. Bottom bunk."

Ray walked over and threw his bag on the bunk next to Gerard. He got on the top bunk and grinned at Gerard, "Gee, we can whisper secrets to each other when we're supposed to be asleep."

Gerard got on his own bunk and high fived Ray, "Fuck yeah! Secret time."

"Damn, I was gonna ask Gee to make a blanket fort with me in the bottom bunk." Frank said, looking overly disappointed.

Gerard started lightly kicking at Frank's shoulder, "We could do both."

Frank put his hand on Gerard's thigh, "But I only have room for you and me."

"Okaay, I feel like a major third wheel, so I'm gonna go see if Travie's around. Later, guys." Ray jumped off his bunk and left Frank and Gerard in the sleeping area.

"Pfft, we weren't third wheeling him. That doesn't even make sense." Gerard scoffed.

"Yeah, we totally weren't. He's just being dumb." Frank laughed and Gerard's heart skipped a beat. They were actually standing pretty close together, Frank's hand resting halfway up Gerard's thigh and Gerard's leg brushing up against Frank's side.

Maybe they were third wheeling Ray.

Gerard cleared his throat and said, "Do you uh, want me to show you around?"

"Yeah, sure." Frank smiled and squeezed Gerard's leg softly. Gerard blushed and jumped off the bed, leading Frank around the lodge.

"Winter camp is a lot more chill then summer camp, 'cause a lot less people come. It's still really fun, though. Just in a different way." Gerard said as they walked down the stairs.

"There's a summer camp too?"

"Yeah, but that lasts a whole week. It can get pretty crowded in the summer. Like, there's this other church that comes at the same time as us. They're like, really fucking weird and really small in numbers, but also pretty cool. Their leader, Ryland, is really fucking weird, though."

Frank laughed, "How so?"

"I don't know, it's hard to explain. But if you ever meet him, you'll understand what I mean. Oh hey! It's Travie." Gerard waved at Travie, gesturing for him to come over. He walked over and grinned at Gerard, saying, "Gerard! How have you been? Also, where's Mikey? I asked Pete earlier, but he just froze up."

Gerard and Frank exchanged and awkward glance, before Gerard replied, "Oh, uh, he was... grounded.... for reasons."

"Reasons?" Travie laughed, "Sounds suspicious, but I'll leave it be. So, Gerard, you gonna introduce me to your friend?" He grinned at Frank.

"Oh, I'm Frank. I'm new to the youth group."

"Nice to meet you, Frank! I take it this is your first time coming here, right?"

"Yup. Gerard was actually just showing me around."

"Cool! Well, I guess I'll leave you to it. Bye, Gerard."

"Yeah, bye, Travie." Gerard smiled at Travie as he walked away.

"So, yeah. That's Travie. He's really awesome, really nice too. Great guy in general."

"He seems like it." 

"Yeah, he is. But, anyway, back to the tour." Gerard grinned at Frank and they continued walking around. After a little bit, Gerard stopped and said, "You know, they say this place used to be a satanic hospice. There was a pentagram on the floor and everything."

"Seriously?" Frank laughed.

"No, not seriously. Gerard, stop spreading that rumor." Vicky walked over to them and rolled her eyes at Gerard.

"Vicky, you and I both know that it's true."

"No, no it is not."

"Yes it is." Gerard gasped, "How do we know you aren't just covering it up? Are you going to sacrifice us in our sleep, Vicky?"

"I'm not gonna sacrifice you while you sleep, Gerard." Vicky said with a laugh.

"Oh really? How can I believe you, witch?"

"Did you just call me a witch?"

"Yep, a Satan worshiping witch." Gerard grinned.

Vicky rolled her eyes again, "You're unbelievable, Gerard."

"I'm taking that as a compliment."

"'Course you are. Well, I gotta do stuff. See you around, guys." Vicky walked away, leaving Frank and Gerard alone again.

Gerard turned to Frank, "So, lets finish this tour up."

\----------

They were all sitting in the dining area- Frank, Gerard, Ray, Pete, Patrick, and Hayley sitting at a table together- when Billie Joe Armstrong stood up and said, "Aright, we're gonna play some games. So stand up, we're gonna sort you into groups first."

Everyone stood up, getting into a circle, and Billie Joe Armstrong started splitting them up into groups of two. He got to Pete and said, "Hm, you can be with Tyler."

Everyone froze up, knowing about the bad blood between Pete and Tyler- the New Year's lock-in still fresh in their minds. Dallon coughed awkwardly and walked over to Billie Joe Armstrong, whispering something to him. Billie Joe Armstrong nodded, then said, "Okay, so Pete and Tyler won't be paired together. Pete, you can stay with Patrick. Tyler, hmm... you can be with Frank."

Tyler scoffed and rolled his eyes, muttering something like "Perfect." while Frank just laughed. Billie Joe Armstrong raised his eyebrows and asked, "Am I missing something?"

"Nope, absolutely nothing." Frank replied, still giggling. He winked at Tyler and Tyler just groaned and turned away.

"Okay... right. I'm not changing my decision again..

Dallon looked nervously between Frank and Tyler, then leaned closer to Billie Joe Armstrong and mumbled, "Keep a close eye on those two, okay?"

Billie Joe Armstrong rolled his eyes, then continued, "Okay, Gerard, you're with Mike. Ray, you're with Debby."

He finished pairing people up, then let them go to their partners. Gerard high fived Mike as he approached and said, "Hey, man."

"Yo, whats up?" Mike said.

"Same old, same old. What game are we playing, anyway? Did he say?"

"No, I don't think he did. He probably will soon, though."

Sure enough, once everyone was standing with their partners, Billie Joe Armstrong started speaking again, "Okay, so we're gonna be playing Threshold. These are the rules, just in case there are any newbies here.

"So basically, you all will be split into two circles, one inside the other, walking in opposite directions. I will occasionally yell out one of these three things: threshold, horse, or piggyback. When I yell 'threshold', you have to pick your partner up. When I yell 'horse', one of you has to get down on all fours while the other person has to get on your back. When I yell 'piggyback', one of you has to jump on the others back. You guys understand?"

Everyone nodded and Billie Joe Armstrong clapped his hands together, "Great! Lets start."

They all got into position and Billie Joe Armstrong yell, "Start!" They started walking and Gerard hoped that Mike wouldn't expect Gerard to carry him, since he probably would accidentally drop him. Billy Joe Armstrong suddenly called out "Threshold!" and everyone went into a frenzy looking for their partner.

Gerard and Mike found each other quickly and Mike held out his arms to pick Gerard up. They were wobbly and Gerard was afraid Mike would drop him. Everyone around them were also finding their partners quickly, so Mike wouldn't have to carry him for much longer.

Suddenly, there was a yelp followed by a loud thud. Gerard looked to see Tyler laying on the floor- groaning and trying to get up- and Frank standing over him, smiling innocently.

"Oops." Frank said cheekily and Dallon sighed. Tyler finally got up and glared at Frank, saying, "What the hell? Why did you drop me, asshole?"

Frank shrugged, "It was on accident."

Tyler shoved him, "No it wasn't! You dropped me on purpose!"

"So what?" Frank shoved him back, "You can't prove it, dick head."

"I swear I will-"

"What? Insult me? Or do you just want another bloody nose?"

"Whoa, whoa- simmer down, boys. What's with the hostility?" Billie Joe Armstrong said, walking over and standing in between Tyler and Frank. Dallon sighed again and replied, "Uh, I did say that you should keep an eye on them and that's because there was an... argument at our New Year's lock-in."

"Okay, you two need to sit on opposite sides of the room from each other and if you don't get along for the rest of the weekend I'm gonna make you do trust exercises." Billie Joe Armstrong said. Frank and Tyler sighed and walked to different sides of the room and Gerard swore he heard Billie Joe Armstrong whisper, "Get it together, man." to Dallon. 

Billie Joe Armstrong turned to the main group and said, "Alright, let's continue."

They played for a few more rounds before Gerard and Mike got out because they didn't get to each other quickly enough. Gerard walked over to Frank and laughed saying, "Did you really have to drop Tyler?"

Frank grinned, "You're asking that like I did it on purpose." 

Gerard rolled his eye and sat down, "Oh, shut up. You and I both know you dropped him on purpose."

Frank shrugged and winked, "What can I say? I have slippery hands." 

"Oh, yeah, sure you do."

"It's true! it's a serious condition. I was diagnosed when I was only a little one. My mother cried." Frank said in a serious tone of voice.

"Sounds like a completely true story."

Frank laughed, "But, honestly, can you blame me? That dick deserved it.'

"Yeah that's true. I still can't believe what that asshole did." Gerard sighed and thought of how sad Mikey must be, home alone right now, away from Pete.

Frank shook his head, "You never believe how terrible people can be until you witness it firsthand."

"Yeah..." Gerard leaned his head on Frank's shoulder. "Man, the whole getting-only-two-hours-of-sleep thing is starting to kick in. I'm fucking exhausted."

Frank wrapped his arm around Gerard's shoulder, "You should take a nap."

"They normally have, like, non-stop activities planned the whole day, but I'll be okay I'm used to being tired all the time."

"That's not something you should be used to, but tell me if you change your mind and want to ditch these people and take a nap with me."

Gerard buried his face in frank's shoulder to hide his blush and said, "I might just take you up on the offer later."

Frank smiled and was about to say something when he was interrupted by a scream coming from Sisky. Gerard moved away from Frank and looked to see what had happened. Sisky was sitting on the floor holding his ankle looking like he was in a lot of pain and Nate was standing over him apologizing profusely. Travie ran over and helped Sisky up. He was limping but it didn't look like he was too badly hurt. Travie and Nate helped him out of the room, probably going where Sisky could put ice on his ankle and rest it a bit. Gerard smiled to himself- it wasn't camp until someone got hurt. 

The game continued for a little while longer and Pete and Patrick joined Frank and Gerard shortly after the Nate and Sisky incident. Eventually it was down to the last two teams: Ray and Debby vs. Josh and Sarah. Ray and Debbie ended up winning but it was close. The two winners high-fived and grinned at each other triumphantly. 

Billie Joe Armstrong clapped his hands together and said, "Okay, time for the next game! I will be separating you into two groups and this time the team assignments are final so if you end up with someone you don't like you're just gonna have to deal, okay?"

Sisky, Nate, and Travie came back the. Sisky was limping slightly, but overall looked fine. Nate was holding him up, but it didn't look like he had to but was more doing it as a precautionary measure.

Billie Joe Armstrong made them all line up and then counted them off into two teams, each with a leader. Team one was Frank, Tyler- they tried to convince Billie Joe Armstrong to change his "all teams are final" rule, but he refused- Sarah, Debby, Nate, Mike, Michael, Andy, and Vicky as their leader. Team two was Gerard, Pete, Patrick, Josh, Hayley, Ariel, Sisky, Alex, Jenna, and Travie as their leader.

The game was simple: each team was to make the most disgusting drink possible using only what they found in the kitchen. They then would present their drinks to Bob and have him judge who's drink was worse. Bob didn't want to be the judge but they figured it was only fair since he was in charge of the kitchen. 

The teams went to opposite sides of the room and came up with their team names. Alex grinned and suggested "Gold Team Rules!" the rest of the team agreed. Gerard heard Sarah laugh and suggest "Jesus Luvrz" as the other team's name. When it was time to announce their names Gold Team Rules! yelled out their name in unison and let out a victory cry. The other team just giggled as Sarah said "Our name is Jesus Luvrz. That's spelled l-u-v-r-z." 

Frank grinned and waved at Gerard yelling, "I'm gonna bring you down, Way! Prepare yourself."

"Over my dead body, Iero.!" Gerard yelled back. Frank laughed and flipped him off. Gerard rolled his eyes and turned away from Frank.

Enough distraction. This was war now.

Gerard's team- Gold Team Rules!- went for the spicy route, grabbing as much hot sauce and jalapenos as they could. They also grabbed salt, lemons, a can of sprite, and a can of baked bean to add texture. They were given fifteen minutes to make their drinks, so they decided to work together to get everything cut up and blended in that period of time. 

Well they didn't so much "work together" as they did just fuck around. By the time ten minutes were gone, Gerard had eaten half of their jalapenos and they had started throwing the beans at each other. When Billie Joe Armstrong told them that they only had five minutes Hayley decided to get their team together and scolded them for wasting food and made Sisky stop waving a bottle of hot sauce in front of Josh, making him blush and mutter about how "it was only a dare, dammit."

Frank kept taunting Gerard from across the room, grinning his cocky little smile while hurling insults at Gerard. Travie rolled his eyes whenever Gerard responded but didn't say anything. 

Gerard felt like a little kid, insulting the boy he liked instead of telling him how he actually felt. He didn't care though and instead just ignored that thought and yelled, "Your mother is a hamster and your father smells of elderberries." at Frank.

Frank started laughing and flipped Gerard off again. Gerard grinned and noticed Tyler glaring at them from the corner of his eye.

At this point Gerard really didn't give a shit about what Tyler thought of him. He was sure Tyler just thought he was disgusting, but he was a dick and Gerard didn't care about dicks. Okay, he cared a little about dicks, but he didn't care what they thought about him. 

The fifteen minutes ran out and the two teams brought forth their drinks. Bob examined each drink and made a gagging motion. He turned to Gold Team Rules! and asked, "So, what is this... masterpiece called?"

Travie shrugged, "We didn't really name it."

"Well, what's in it?" Bob eyed the drink nervously.

"Uhm, mostly lemon juice, jalapenos, and hot sauce. We were gonna use beans but they became sort of unusable." Patrick replied, picking a bean out of his hair.

"Interesting. Well, here it goes." Bob picked up the glass hesitantly and then took a sip. He started coughing and put the cup down quickly. Ater he composed himself he cleared his throat and said, "Wow, that's spicey. How many jalapenos did you put in this?"

"About four. We had more but _somebody_ kept eating them." Hayley said and glared at Gerard.

Bob gave Gerard a look and asked, "Why on earth would you eat multiple plain jalapenos?" 

Gerard shrugged, "I like them." 

"I don't know what I expected. Alright, time for the other team's drink." Bob shuddered.

"We're called the Jesus Luvrz." Sarah corrected.

"Whatever." Bob picked up the drink, and sniffed it, "Did you come up with a name for this?"

Debbie grinned, "Yes we did! It's called Cinnamon Twist and I hope you like it." 

"The whole point is to make him not enjoy it, Debbie." Ray said.

"Oh yeah, well then, I hope you hate it, Bob!" She said enthusiastically.

"Thanks, I'm sure I will." Bob looked at the cup and cautiously took a sip. He immediately gagged and spit out the tiny bit that entered his mouth. "Holy shit!"

"Watch your language!" Vicky scolded.

"You didn't taste it, Vicky! I don't even want to know what's was in that. The Jesus Luvrz win. I'm gonna wash my mouth out now."

Bob got up quickly and left the room as if he was trying to run from the taste in his mouth. The Jesus Luvrz cheered and high-fived each other happily, except for Tyler and Frank who were just trying to avoid each other. 

They played some more games for a while before they stopped to have dinner. After dinner Billie Joe Armstrong gathered them together in the main room and said, "Alright everyone it's time to play  **murder in the dark!** Now, if you don't know the rules it's really simple. I'll pass out these pieces of paper, all of which are blank except one. The person who gets the marked piece of paper is the murderer. We will then turn out all of the lights and you all will run free. The murderer will pat your neck to kill you, and when you are murdered you cannot move or talk- you are dead. If you find a dead body, yell 'murder in the dark' and everyone, but the corpses, will gather here for a hearing. The game continues until the murderer is caught, or until everyone is dead. If you don't get it, you will figure it out."

He handed out the pieces of paper and the game started. Gerard and Frank were walking around the lodge together, not really caring if they got killed. They stopped walking and leaned against a wall, talking about various things. Frank leaned his head on Gerard's shoulder and said, "Shit, I just remembered that you haven't gotten sleep today. Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it." Gerard laughed, waving Frank off.

"Yeah, but you must be tired."

"It's fine, I'm used to it."

"Just because you're used to something doesn't make it good. Sleep's important, dude."

"You sound like Mikey."

"That's just because we both care about you."

Gerard rolled his eyes, "Yeah, whatever. I can sleep later."

Gerard noticed Sisky walking over and waved at him. Sisky approached them and said, "Hey, guys."

"Hey, how's your foo-" Gerard was interrupted by Sisky patting Frank and Gerard's neck at the same time.

Frank laughed, "Please tell me we aren't the first dead."

Sisky grinned widely, "You actually are the first dead. Bye! Enjoy death!"

"I will." Gerard called after Sisky as he ran off, leaving Frank and Gerard alone again. Gerard shrugged and sat on the ground, back pressed against the wall. Frank followed suite, sitting down right next to Gerard, and whispered, "We aren't allowed to talk, right?"

"Yeah, so shut up." Gerard giggled.

"Damn, okay. We can just have a silent conversation."

"Good plan."

Frank leaned his head on Gerard's shoulder again and Gerard smiled. They sat there for a while, silent but comfortable in each other's presence. Next thing Gerard knew, he was drifting off to sleep, head resting on Frank.

They woke up a while later to people laughing and someone saying, "Dude, here they are. They fell asleep."

Gerard opened his eyes to see Pete, Patrick, Ray, and Sisky standing over them. Sisky and Pete were laughing, while Patrick said, "Hey, guys, get up. The game's over, we have an hour of free time before we have to go to the teaching."

Frank blinked at the four guys and _oh god he looks so cute waking up_ , Gerard thought as he watched Frank stretch his arms over his head.

"Fuck, my back hurts. I guess sleeping on the ground will do that." Frank laughed.

"Eh, you get used to it after a while." Gerard said as he stood up.

Frank used Gerard to balance himself as he got up. He patted Gerard's shoulder and shook his head, "You are used to too many shitty things, my friend. Someday I will unwrap the mystery that is your life."

Gerard rolled his eyes, "My life isn't mysterious, you just haven't known me for a long time."

"Well then you can just tell me all about it sometime."

"Yeah, okay. It's pretty boring, though. You'll be disappointed."

"I think I'll just just enjoy getting to know more about you and your life, to be honest."

Gerard blushed, "I highly doubt that, my life is really fucking boring."

"Eh, we'll see." Frank grinned.

Debby walked up to the group and asked, "Do you guys want to play Apples to Apples?"

"Yeah, sure!" Ray replied.

The seven of them walked to the dining hall and sat at one of the tables. William, Josh, Hayley, and Andy were already sitting down, and Debby sat down next to Josh and said, "Yo, I got more people."

Gerard sat down next to William, "Yes, we are here. Warning, though: I have had about 3 hours of sleep, so things will get _weird_."

"Hey, weird is good when it comes to this game." Frank said as he sat down next to Gerard.

"Yeah, but this isn't even funny weird. It's just 'that makes no sense, Gerard' weird."

William patted Gerard's shoulder, "It's okay, I think all of us here have seen you in that state before."

"Okay, that's probably true."

Andy pulled out the cards and started shuffling them, "Who's gonna judge first?"

"I will." Patrick replied.

"Cool." Andy passed out the cards, then put the stack of green apple cards in the middle of the table. They started playing and Frank and Gerard kept showing each other their cards and laughing loudly at everything.

"Listen," Frank said seriously, "It isn't my card, but pick mixed nuts, Gee."

Gerard laughed, "I don't believe that it's not your card!"

"No, I swear it isn't mind! I just- _mixed nuts_."

"I'm not gonna pick mixed nuts just to spite you."

"Well, you fucking suck." Frank stared at Gerard intently, but instead of turning away, Gerard stared back. They sat there staring into each other's eyes for a long while, before Hayley cleared her throat and said, "Uhm, Gerard? Are.... are you gonna pick?"

Gerard finally looked away from Frank and replied, "Oh, yeah. Uh, I pick mixed nuts."

"Hell yeah!" Sisky said, grabbing the green apple card and putting it in front of himself.

"Huh, it really wasn't yours."

"I did say that." Frank giggled.

"Okay, now it's my turn..." William mumbled, then flipped over the next green apple card, saying, "Okay, the card is 'erotic.'"

Pete sniggered and slammed his red apple card down, "I have the perfect card."

"I'm sure you do." William laughed.

"Trust me, this one is gonna win."

"We'll see."

They all put their cards down and William picked them up, looking through them.

"What's the blank card supposed to be?" He asked.

Pete smirked, "Gabe Saporta."

William groaned and everyone else started laughing. Frank looked around in confusion, "Who's Gabe Saporta?"

"He's just... a guy... who works here during summer camp... Just a friend." William replied awkwardly.

"Yeah, and Pete and Mikey are just friends." Gerard scoffed.

Pete grinned, "Yeah, exactly. Bill and Gabe have the same sort of friendship that Mikey and I have."

Frank wiggled his eyebrows at William, "Oh really?"

"No, of course not..." William coughed, "But, uh, pickles win."

"You're damn right!" Gerard yelled and triumphantly grabbed the pickles card and stuck it in his pocket. William was about to stop him, when Dallon walked in and said, "The teaching is starting in about 10 minutes, so finish up and meet upstairs."

They all got up and cleared up the game, then made their way upstairs to the main room. Frank and Gerard separated from the others, wanting to sit in the very back.Billie Joe Armstrong stood up at the front of the room and began speaking.

Gerard started zoning out almost immediately, hoping no one would notice the far off, bored look in his eyes. He glanced over at Frank to see that he was doodling on his hand with a pen.

At this point, Gerard was pretty sure Frank liked him back. He still had his doubts, though. The way Frank had been acting around him seemed like he _might_ like Gerard, but he could have just been reading into things.

Gerard watched the pen glide across Frank's hands and he wanted desperately to hold them, kiss them, to know how they felt touching him. He felt a little weird thinking about Frank like this, but he _did_ have really nice hands.

And really nice lips, and really nice eyes and hair and-

Frank looked up from his hands, noticing that Gerard was staring at him. Gerard blushed, but didn't look away. Instead, he maintained eye contact for what seemed like forever.

Frank bit his lip, taking Gerard's hand and pulling it closer to himself. Gerard felt like his heart was going to stop as Frank took the pen and started writing on Gerard's hand. After he was done writing, Gerard took his hand back to see what Frank had written.

_'what are you looking at?'_

Gerard blushed more and grabbed Frank's hand, writing his reply on it.

' _nothing_ '

Frank rolled his eyes, then wrote:

_'not nothing. me.'_

Gerard bit his lip.

_'why would i look at you?'_

_'because im pretty'_

Frank grinned and Gerard laughed softly.

_'yeah right'_

_'you know its true'_

_'ur as pretty as my asshole'_

_'how do i know you dont have a pretty asshole'_

_'im pretty sure no one has a pretty asshole frank'_

_'i bet you have a pretty asshole gee'_

They continued talking like this for the rest of the sermon, eventually running out of room on their arms and switching to writing in blank spaces in Gerard's bible.

The sermon ended and Frank moved to get up, but Gerard stopped him. Frank looked at him questioningly and Gerard whispered, "There's a prayer time after the service. I mean, you don't have to stay for the whole thing, but it's always awkward getting up right after the teaching ends."

"Oh, okay. We are allowed to leave, though, right?"

"Yeah, we are. Don't worry. Prayer time always gets weird anyway."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Everyone always starts sobbing, it's really awkward."

"Oh, yeah, that sounds awkward." Frank laughed quietly.

They waited around for ten minutes and, sure enough, everyone else started to cry around them. After a little longer, Frank leaned closer to Gerard and whispered, "Do you want to leave?" in Gerard's ear. Gerard nodded and they both got up, quietly leaving the room.

They went back to the sleeping area and sat in Frank's bunk. Earlier, they had made it into a blanket fort, so the lighting was dim inside.

They just talked for a while, enjoying the absence of everyone else. Gerard kept getting distracted by Frank's mouth, but he didn't mind much since Frank also seemed to be getting distracted easily.

Maybe he was tired.

Eventually, Gerard started to notice how Frank was slowly moving closer to him. At first he thought it was his imagination, but soon Frank was practically sitting in his lap. Gerard's heart was pounding in his chest and he could barely hear what Frank was saying. What he did hear sounded like nonsense, like Frank was just talking because he didn't know what else to do.

"-And honestly I don't think you're even paying attention to what I'm saying-" Frank mumbled.

"Uh huh."

"-It seems like you're thinking about something completely different and-"

"Yeah, uh huh."

"-It's quite rude of you to just stare at me like that, but not say anything. It's like I'm talking to a tree-"

"Yep."

"-And I'm slightly offended about this."

Their faces were barely an inch apart and Frank was still mumbling incoherently, Gerard still giving empty acknowledgements to what he was saying.

"You look like a fish this up close. A really weird fish."

"Mhm."

"Like, really weird. It's amazing, really, how weird you look."

"Interesting."

"But to be fair I probably also look like a really weird fish."

"Yup."

"-And I think- Oh, you're taking too long." Frank grabbed Gerard's head and pulled him in the short distance for a kiss. Gerard didn't know what to do with his hands, so he just tangled them in Frank's hair, pulling him closer. Frank pushed closer to Gerard so their chests were pressing together.

A few minutes passed and they pulled away, foreheads pressed against each other. Gerard started giggling and Frank looked at him funny, asking, "Why are you laughing?"

"I don't know!" Gerard replied, still giggling.

Frank rolled his eyes and kissed Gerard again. He tried to stop laughing and was mostly successful, but he still couldn't help giggling a little. Frank rested his hands on Gerard's waist and pushed him down lightly, so Frank was lying on top of Gerard. They stopped kissing then and just looked at each other. Gerard thought Frank looked amazing like this: his hair falling into his face, mouth wet and hanging open, looking at Gerard like he too was beautiful.

It was surreal, but Gerard never wanted it to end.

\----------

Gerard woke up the next morning with his arms around Frank. He let out a sigh of relief, glad that the previous night actually happened and t wasn't just a really realistic dream. Frank stirred in his arms and turned to look at Gerard.

"'Morning, Gee." Frank mumbled.

"'Morning, Frankie." Gerard yawned and sat up, stretching his arms over his head. Frank pulled him back down and kissed him by surprise. Gerard laughed, but kissed him back. He pulled away quickly, though, noticing the sounds of other people getting up. Ray peaked his head through their blanket wall and said, "Get up, assholes. We got church to go to."

Gerard laughed and got out of the bunk, having to climb over Frank in the process. Frank didn't seem to mind, though, briefly touching the small of Gerard's back as he left. It sent shivers through his body, but he tried to hide that from Ray.

"Good morning to you, too, my kind friend. How did you sleep?"

Ray laughed, "Absolutely swimmingly, friend. How 'bout you?"

"Same old, same old." Gerard hoped Ray didn't question the fact that he slept in the same bunk as Frank. But, if he did notice, he wouldn't care. As far as he knew, they were still only friends.

Which brought up another question: what was the status of their relationship?

Where they still only friends? Was this just a one time thing for Frank? Was he just testing the waters and didn't actually want to get with Gerard? These thoughts were prominent in his mind through the morning and afternoon, only ever subsiding when Frank looked or smiled at him.

They started getting ready to leave camp, when Gerard pulled Ray aside to tell him about what happened between him and Frank.

"What's up?" Ray asked as Gerard led him to an empty location.

Gerard stopped walking and chewed his lip nervously, trying not to look directly at Ray. Ray rolled his eyes, "Gerard, just say whatever you want to say."

"Frank and I kissed last night." Gerard blurted out.

Ray smirked, "Finally."

" _Finally_? What do you mean finally?"

"I mean we all- me, Mikey, Pete, and even Patrick- have wanted you two to get together since you met."

"But, I- what?"

Gerard was looking at Ray in confusion and Ray just laughed, saying, "Yeah, it was so fucking obvious that you two liked each other it hurt. Like, we even made plans to try to like, push you two together. It was really frustrating, actually."

"Are- are you serious?" Gerard started laughing, "Fucking hell- you all knew before I did, didn't you?"

"Depends, did you realize Frank thought you were really hot from the second he saw you?"

"He doesn't think I'm really hot-"

"Shut up. Have you seen the way he looks at you? He totally has the hots for you."

"Saying 'he has the hots for you' sounds creepy."

"But it's true."

Gerard rolled his eyes, "Yeah, right. I'm sure it is. We probably should go back to everyone else."

"You're doing that thing where you don't technically deny a compliment, but it's also obvious that you don't believe it."

"I don't-"

"Yes, you do. But whatever, we probably should go back to everyone else, before they start wondering where we are."

"Good idea." Gerard stuck his hands into his pants pocket as they walked, then stopped suddenly and pulled out the red apple card he had shoved in there the night before.

"Where did this come from?" He asked, looking at Ray in confusion.

"You put it in your pocket last night when we were playing Apples to Apples."

"We played Apples to Apples?"

"...Yes, Gerard. We did. How exhausted were you?" Ray laughed.

"I, uh, don't know. Oh well." Gerard shrugged and put the card back into his pocket. They continued back to the main group and finished their packing. Frank kept giving Gerard looks that made the butterflies flutter in his stomach.

Right before they left, Frank pulled Gerard into an empty bathroom. Gerard giggled and looked at him in confusion, "What are you doing?"

"Did you know that we kissed after midnight last night?" Frank asked with a grin.

"Uhm... no? Is that important for some reason?"

Frank's grin widened, "It is! Today is Valentine's Day, Gee. You had your first kiss on Valentine's Day."

Gerard laughed, "Really? Wow, that's... so cliche. I love it."

Frank wrapped his arms around Gerard's neck and pulled him down for a kiss.

"Happy Valentine's Day, babe." Frank mumbled against Gerard's lips.

Later, on the drive home, Gerard didn't stop himself from holding Frank's hand.

\----------

When Gerard got home, he immediately wanted to tell Mikey what happened. But, would it be mean to, since Mikey was still upset about Pete? Would it seem like Gerard was trying to rub his happiness like salt into Mikey's still very open wound?

He ended up just going to his own room, throwing his bag into the corner- where it would stay, still full of clothes, for the next couple months- and flopping onto his bed. He laid there motionless for a few hours- not sleeping, just laying still, like a cat.

After a while, Mikey walked in holding two bowls of pasta and saying, "Yo, how was camp?"

Gerard sat up and looked at Mikey, "Can I have one of those bowls?"

"No, they're both for me."

"Miikeeeyy-"

"I was kidding, of course one's for you." Mikey sat down next to Gerard and handed him one of the bowls, "So, what happened at camp? Anything interesting?"

Gerard shrugged, still not sure if he should tell Mikey about Frank, "Just the normal stuff, really. Sisky hurt his ankle, Bob threw up- same old, same old."

"Definitely sounds like camp, alright." Mikey laughed, took a bite of his pasta, then said, "You sure nothing interesting happened? Usually there's at least one thing."

Gerard looked down and started picking at his blanket, "Well... there was this one thing..."

"Yeah? What was it?"

"Uhm... Frank kinda kissed me." Gerard blushed and took a large bite of pasta.

"Holy shit, really? Fucking finally!" Mikey grinned.

"Why does everyone keep saying finally? Ray said the same thing when I told him!"

"It's because you both obviously like each other." Mikey laughed, "Man, I can't wait to tell... Pete." His voice trailed off and Gerard put his hand on Mikey's shoulder.

"He misses you a lot, you know."

Mikey smiled slightly, "Yeah?"

"Yeah, he told me so. Asked how you were doing, too."

"He's really sweet, isn't he? Fuck, I miss him so much. Did you tell him that? Tell him that I miss him a lot?"

Gerard squeezed Mikey's shoulder, "Yeah, I told him."

"Thanks, Gee." Mikey smiled slightly more and Gerard squeezed his shoulder again.

"Yeah, no problem."

They sat quietly for a while, Mikey eventually breaking the silence by asking with a smirk, "So... how was your first kiss?"

Gerard blushed and fell back on his bed, "It was niice."

Mikey wiggled his eyebrows, "How nice?"

"Really nice." Gerard giggled.

Mikey patted Gerard's stomach, "I'm happy for you, dude. Who initiated it? Wait, what am I saying? Frank initiated it."

Gerard laughed, "Of course Frank initiated it. I'm too awkward to do something like that."

"Awkward is one word for it."

"Oh shush." Gerard grinned, "Also, we technically kissed on Valentine's Day."

"Shit, seriously? You romantic asshole."

"I didn't plan it! It just happened that way!"

"Maybe you didn't plan it, but you were still totally geeking out about it."

"Maaybeee." Gerard giggled.

"Fuckin' romantic."

"Heartless asshole."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big thank you to my most amazing beta/sister/best friend in the entire world for dealing with my shit and getting this chapter uploaded. I don't know where I'd be without you. You are the light of my life.
> 
> also my tumblr is transboykobrakid.tumblr.com so y'all should hmu there okay bye


	10. Leviticus 18:22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "So," Gerard turned to Mikey, "What do you plan on doing with Pete when he's here?" He asked with a knowing smirk. He was wearing a dark-almost black- purple lipstick and Mikey thought he looked like a goth princess.
> 
> "You look goth." Mikey said, instead of answering Gerard's question.
> 
> "No, I look hot. Now, whatcha plan on doing, Mikey?"
> 
> Mikey rolled his eyes, "Y'know... things."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay....... sorry again guys!!!! y'all are probs getting annoyed but yeah I am really sorry this is so late omg but our computer just like... broke so I haven't really been able to get on the internet very much so ahh also I've been having a lot of writer's block so it's just slow going lmao but here i finally am with a new chapter i hope u enjoy

Things had been getting slowly better for Mikey. It's still wasn't good, but it was getting better.

He was actually allowed to hangout with Pete, but only in a public place, under a watchful eye. Mikey was able to convince his parents that Gerard was a good chaperone, so it usually wasn't too terrible. They still couldn't kiss or talk about anything too personal but they still got to spend some time together. Sometimes, if they were lucky, Gerard would play look out and they could hug and whisper reassurances into each other's ear, but they didn't dare do anything more than that. The clung to the little time they had together because it was better than nothing at all.

Mikey was at youth group and kept trying to approach Pete without Dallon hovering near by. Eventually Dallon was called elsewhere and Pete ran over to Mikey.

"Hey, babe." Pete whispered with a grin.

"Don't call me that here; I don't want you getting in trouble." Mikey whispered back.

Pete shrugged, "I'm already in a shit ton of trouble, how much worse can it get?"

Mikey rolled his eyes, "You should still be careful. I just don't want you taken away from me again."

"I know, and I'm sorry. That was hell. The whole time I just wanted to talk to you about how much I missed you."

"It's okay, if we stay on our best behavior they're gonna let us do more together."

"Yeah, hopefully." Pete sighed and then grinned, "Hey, are your parents going to that weekend retreat thing?" 

"Yeah, they are. Why?"

"Well... that's like a whole weekend where both of our parents will be gone." Pete bit his lip.

"And what are you suggesting we do when our parents are miles away from us?" Mikey grinned.

"Oh, nothing, I was just thinking that maybe Gerard could go somewhere, leaving you alone and in need of some company." 

Mikey had to hold himself back from grinning like an idiot. He also had the urge to hug Pete and never let him go. Instead he just nodded and said, "Y'know I don't think Gerard would be opposed to staying with Frank for the weekend."

"Yeah, that seems like something he might like." Pete grinned, "By the way what's happening with that? Frank and Gerard's... uh friendship. I mean something definitely has to be happening. You need to fill me in when I come over."

Mikey started giggling, "Oh, yeah, I will. Trust me I've been wanting to talk to you about this."

After that night Mikey was full of hope. His parents were a little nervous about leaving him for a whole weekend but he convinced them that Gerard would make sure he didn't do anything bad and they believed it. Pete had convinced his parents to let him stay with Patrick for the weekend and from there he go to Mikey's house, and Frank was more than happy to let Gerard say with him. Everything seemed to be going well, and Mikey just hoped it stayed that way. He was scared that something would go wrong, that someone would slip up and their parents would find out, making it so he really wouldn't be able to see Pete again. So far, everything was fine, but he had thought everything was fine back in December, so he couldn't be too careful. He'd rather be safe then sorry.

Friday night came and Mikey was starting to panic. He was so close to being able to spend time with Pete again, he was afraid it would somehow slip through his fingers. 

Mikey went into Gerard's room late at night and they both started panicking about the next day. Mikey sat on Gerard's bed and watched him do his makeup. He actually was pretty good, obviously he had practiced a lot.

"So," Gerard turned to Mikey, "What do you plan on doing with Pete when he's here?" He asked with a knowing smirk. He was wearing a dark-almost black- purple lipstick and Mikey thought he looked like a goth princess.

"You look goth." Mikey said, instead of answering Gerard's question.

"No, I look hot. Now, whatcha plan on doing, Mikey?"

Mikey rolled his eyes, "Y'know... things."

"Mhm... The condoms and lube I gave you for Christmas are in here. I figured mom would find them in your room, so I moved them so she wouldn't find them."

"I- uh- What makes you think I'll need those..." Mikey mumbled.

"I'm not saying you'll need them, I'm just saying that I might accidentally leave them in your room before I go to Frank's house. Y'know, just in case."

Gerard did end up "accidentally" leaving the condoms and lube in Mikey's room. Mikey was kind of embarrassed about this, but he figured it might actually come in handy so he wouldn't complain.

Their parents left the house and soon after Gerard was also leaving.

"Have fun with Pete." Gerard said with a wink before he left.

Mikey rolled his eyes, "Same for you and Frank."

"Oh, we're gonna have so much fun. Just... just _so_ much fun. You can't even comprehend how much fun we're gonna-"

"Oh my god, I get it. Shoo, shoo! Your lover awaits."

Gerard grinned widely at Mikey, then finally left. Now Mikey was completely alone in the house- at least, for now. Soon, Pete would be there and they would be alone together at last. He still wasn't sure how he would react when Pete arrived, but he just knew that he was glad Gerard wouldn't be here to witness it.

Mikey was pacing in front of the door when the doorbell rang. He quickly opened the door, revealing Pete standing there with a dozen red roses and bleach blond hair.

"Your hair is blond." Mikey was the first to break the silence, Pete still standing outside with the flowers in his hand.

"Yeah, I uh, you know, was feeling impulsive. Figured dying my hair was the safest way to act on those impulses."

"Yeah, that's good. You look good with the blond."

"Thanks." Pete smiled softly.

"You brought flowers."

Pete looked down at the flowers in his hand, "Oh, yeah. I just- I don't know. I wanted to do something nice, but, now that I think about it, it's kinda stupid."

Mikey smiled, "No, it's not stupid, it's nice. Thank you."

Pete smiled back, "Yeah, I'm um- I'm glad you like them."

Pete handed Mikey the flowers and Mikey's smile widened. He never really saw the point in giving someone flowers until now. But, honestly Pete could do any of the over the top romantic cliches and Mikey would love it.

Because he loved Pete.

Mikey pulled Pete in and shut the door, then dropped the flowers and pulled Pete in for a kiss. Pete seemed slightly startled at first, but kissed Mikey back desperately. Mikey pushed Pete up against the front door, making Pete gasp and tug at Mikey's hair. Mikey tugged on Pete's lip with his teeth and Pete gasped again, then muttered, "Fuck, Mikey, your room. Now."

Mikey pulled away and nodded, then followed Pete upstairs, roses still abandoned on the floor. They kept stopping on the stairs to kiss more, taking almost ten minutes to actually get to Mikey's room.

Mikey quickly opened the door to his room as Pete took off his jacket and threw it on the ground. Mikey was back to kissing him immediately and Pete just kept trying to pull him closer. They fell onto Mikey's bed- Pete on top of Mikey- when they finally stopped kissing. They both were panting heavily as they lay there in silence, staring into each others eyes.

"I love you." Mikey whispered.

"I know." Pete whispered back.

"I wasn't able to tell you before."

"I still knew, Mikey. I always knew."

Mikey started crying and kissed Pete again, softer this time. They kissed like this for a while before Mikey pulled away and mumbled, "Fuck, I missed you so much."

Pete kissed him again quickly before saying, "I missed you too, Mikey. It was awful not being able to talk to you. Awful that this weekend might be the only time we'll be able to really talk for a long time."

"I guess we'll just have to make last then."

Mikey pulled Pete back down for a kiss. They stayed like that for hours- alternating between fast, desperate kisses and slow, passionate kisses. Their clothes slowly got discarded  until they both were completely naked and exploring each other with their mouths. Pete was leaving marks all over Mikey's body and he didn't even care if they were in obvious places. He was too distracted by the way it felt to worry about anything else.

Pete made his way back up Mikey's body and kissed him deeply on the lips. Mikey held onto him tightly, his finger nails digging into Pete's back. Pete started running his hand up and down Mikey's thigh, making him involuntarily spread his legs more. Pete chuckled and slid his hand further up Mikey's thigh, stopping just before he reach his dick.

"Can I?" Pete asked, looking down at Mikey with lust filled eyes.

Mikey bit his lip and nodded, then said, "Wait, I have lube."

Pete's eyes widened, "Wait, you want to...?"

"I mean, only if you want to..."

"No, yeah, I uh- I want to." Pete laughed and kissed Mikey again, before pulling away again to say, "Fuck, you sure you wanna do this?"

"Yeah, I want to. I've thought about this a lot, actually." Mikey admitted. 

"Oh, yeah? How often?" Pete asked, a grin spreading across his face. 

Mikey rolled his eyes, "Oh, you know, every now and then." 

Pete laughed and kissed Mikey before pulling away again and asking, "So where's the lube?"

"On my dresser, and the box of condoms is next to it." 

Pete got up and went to the dresser, grabbing the lube and condoms. Mikey sat up as Pete crawled back on the bed. They sat there awkwardly for a few moments before Pete said, "Uh, so... what do we do now?"

"I was homeschooled, dude, I didn't have sex ed. How should I know what to do?"

"Well it's not like they teach you about anal sex in public school!" 

Mikey laughed, "Oh my god, this is gonna be terrible, isn't it?"

"It's okay I don't think anyone knows what they're doing their first time." 

"Yeah, you're probably right." Mikey giggled, "Do you want to just like... wing it?" 

"I feel like this is another thing you shouldn't just say 'let's just wing it' with."

"Yeah, but it's not like either of us know what we're doing, so we should just what feels best for both of us."

"You're a genius, Mikeyway." Pete grinned.

"I try. Now... lets figure this thing out."

Mikey leaned forward and kissed Pete, then slowly pulled Pete down on top of himself. Pete kissed Mikey back for a while, before sitting back up and saying, "Okay, here comes the hard part. Uhm, what do I do?"

"Uh... fingers? I think?" Mikey replied, obviously not sure of himself.

"Yeah, okay, that seems right." Pete grabbed the bottle of lube and opened it. He poured some onto his fingers, but accidentally poured too much and it got all over Mikey's bed.

Mikey groaned, "Fuck, now I have to wash my sheets."

"You probably would've had to wash the sheets anyway, babe."

"Yeah, but I was gonna wait until you were gone. Now I'll have to do it sooner."

"You can still wait until then."

"Yeah, but where will we sleep?"

"The couch?"

"But what if we want to have sex again?"

"Slow down, tiger. We still haven't had sex once."

"Yes, but we will, and what if we want to again?"

"Would Gerard notice if we used his bed?"

"...Probably not."

"Well then we have everything figured out."

"Yeah, okay." 

"Now, let me make sweet, sweet love to you, Mikeyway." Pete said with a grin.

"Go for it, babe." Mikey laughed.

Pete's grin widened, then his face went dead serious, making Mikey laugh harder. He made sure his finger was slick with lube before slowly pushing it into Mikey. Mikey bit his lip and Pete looked at him nervously.

"It doesn't hurt, right?"

"No... not really. It just feels weird."

"Weird in a good way?"

"Nah, just weird. Try like, moving your finger."

"Yeah, okay." Pete stuck his tongue out in concentration and started slowly moving his finger. Mikey adjusted slightly, trying to get at a more comfortable position.

"Is this even doing anything for you?" Pete asked.

"Uhm, no, not really. Just keep going."

Pete nodded and started speeding up his movements. Mikey started to feel finally something and he bit his lip, his eyes fluttering shut. 

"Uh, what's happening?" Pete asked nervously.

"It-s fuck, it's starting to feel good." Mikey mumbled in reply.

"Wait, seriously?" Pete grinned and accidentally stilled his finger, making Mikey whine slightly and say, "Don't stop, asshole."

"Sorry, sorry! I didn't mean to!" Pete started moving his finger again, quicker this time. Mikey gasped softly and Pete grinned.

"This is actually working?" Pete asked with disbelief.

"Yeah, it is, you dumb face. Do more." Mikey replied, letting out a soft moan.

"Uh, how?"

"I don't know, just do something- fuck." Mikey moaned again and Pete panicked, then pushed in a second finger. Mikey gasped and his hips bucked up, startling Pete.

Pete was going slow again and Mikey was getting frustrated. He knew Pete was just nervous, but goddamn was this getting annoying. He poked at Pete's arm and said, "Go faster."

"But I don't want to hurt yo-"

"I'll tell you if it hurts, just please stop being so _gentle_."

"Okay, okay... I'm sorry, jeez." Pete mumbled, then started moving his fingers quicker again. Mikey moaned and grabbed at the sheets, back arching slightly. Pete muttered, "Holy shit" and twisted his fingers experimentally. Mikey pushed into his fingers and gasped out, "Fuck, Pete."

They kept like this for a little while, before Mikey was holding the sheets tightly and asking for more. Pete hesitantly pushed in a third finger and, again, started off slow. It was fine at first, but he just stayed going slow. Mikey was getting annoyed again, so he glared at Pete and said, "Go faster!"

"I don't want to hurt you, Mikey."

"Go fuck yourself."

"But I'm fucking you."

"No, you aren't." Mikey said through gritted teeth.

"Jesus, Mikey." Pete laughed, but, yet again, did as Mikey asked.

Mikey was getting into it, moaning and panting and not really sure what he was supposed to do with his hands. Pete was just watching him intently, biting his lip hard. He obviously was very turned on and Mikey wanted him to fuck him already.

"I want you to fuck me now." Mikey said through gasps and moans.

"Are you sure you're ready?"

"Yeah, I'm ready. Just fuck me, please."

"Uhm, okay. Just tell me if it hurts too much."

"I thought I already said that I'd do that."

"You did I just, you know, want to make sure."

"Okay, can you just fuck me now?" Mikey asked desperately.

"Yeah, yeah fine. Let me just..." Pete slowly pulled his fingers out of Mikey, making him whimper softly. He grabbed the box of condoms and pulled one out, then ripped open the packaging and put it on. He got the lube and poured some on his hand, careful not to spill ny this time. He started rubbing the lube on his dick, moaning softly as he thrust into his hand. Mikey watched him for a moment before putting his hand on Pete's, stopping his hand from moving.

"That's enough. Come on, fuck me, Pete." Mikey said, looking Pete in the eye. Pete nodded and moved his hand, then he positioned himself over Mikey and muttered, "Just tell me if you want me to stop- for any reason"

"Yeah, I will." Mikey replied. Pete smiled at him before slowly pushing in with a soft moan. Mikey bit his lip, trying to get used to the feeling of Pete inside him. It did hurt, but it wasn't unbearable. He would probably get used to it quickly.

"You okay?" Pete asked softly.

"Yeah, I'm okay. It does hurt a little, but I'm fine."

Pete nodded, "Okay, just-"

"-Tell you if I want you to stop?" Mikey finished with a laugh.

Pete rolled his eyes, "I'm sorry for being considerate." 

"I forgive you." Mikey grinned, "But, are you gonna stay still all day or are you gonna fuck me?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm getting to that." Pete laughed, then leaned down to kiss Mikey as he slowly thrust in. Mikey closed his eyes and let the feeling wash over him. It still hurt, but in a good way.

A _really_ good way.

As Pete started moving quicker, Mikey started moaning louder. He moved with Pete, trying to match his thrusts. Soon they both were moaning and gasping loudly, Mikey dragging his nails up and down Pete's back while Pete attached his mouth to Mikey's neck.

Mikey moaned and arched his back, gasping out, "Fuck, Pete, I love you."

"I love you too, Mikey." 

"Pete... God, fuck- _Pete_." Mikey was cursing and panting, digging his nails into Pete's ass. Pete moaned and slid on hand in between their bodies, starting to slowly jack Mikey off. Mikey groaned and threw his head back, bucking up into Pete's hand. Mikey didn't care if they were having shitty, virgin sex. All he cared about was the fact that this felt amazing and he wanted this feeling to last forever.

Of course, it obviously didn't, and next thing he knew Pete was moaning loudly as he thrust erratically, coming suddenly. He quickened his pace on Mikey's dick and soon after Mikey was also coming. Pete carefully pulled out of Mikey and threw the condom away, before cuddling up to Mikey.

"That was awesome." Pete said, still breathless.

"Yeah, it was." Mikey laughed and buried his head in Pete's chest. They fell asleep like that, wrapped around each other and basking in the feeling of being together. Mikey really hadn't felt so good in a long, long time. He just felt so calm and satisfied in Pete's arms.

They didn't sleep long, only an hour or so. When Mikey woke up, he saw that Pete was already awake. He laughed softly and said, "Were you watching me sleep?"

Pete rolled his eyes, "Don't flatter yourself."

"You just fucked me like an hour ago, Pete."

"I don't see what that has to do with anything."

"You're an idiot." Mikey laughed and kissed Pete softly. They kissed for a while- still only soft, sweet kisses, like they wanted to savor each other. Mikey moved to straddle Pete, breaking the kiss for only a moment to look at him. He looked so amazing like this: mouth open slightly, hair a mess, panting softly. Mikey ran his hand down Pete's chest and muttered, "You're pretty."

"I'm not pretty, I'm punk."

"You can be both, asshole." Mikey laughed, then kissed Pete again.

"Oh, I forgot to ask." Pete interrupted the kiss, "What's the deal with Frank and Gerard now? Did something happen between them yet?"

"Oh, yeah! Frank totally kissed Gee at camp." Mikey replied with a grin.

"Seriously? Fucking finally!"

"That's what I said! Apparently it happened on Valentine's Day."

"That's the most adorable thing I've ever heard."

"Yeah, it is. But, enough about my brother..." Mikey leaned down to kiss Pete, but was interrupted again by Pete's stomach growling. Mikey groaned and said, "Seriously?"

"What? I haven't eaten since like, yesterday."

Mikey sat up, "What? Why haven't you eaten? You need to eat, Pete."

"Dude, chill. I just forgot. I mean, when was the last time _you_ ate?"

"I don't know, like a week ago."

"What the fuck? Seriously? Okay, yep, I'm gonna put some food in you. Come on." Pete pushed Mikey aside and got off the bed, then pulled Mikey up with him.

Mikey stopped him and said, "Wait, let me at least put underwear on. It's weird like this."

"Why? We're the only ones here."

"Yeah, I know, but it's still kinda weird."

"Alright, fine. We'll put our underwear on. But, you're missing out on a golden opportunity to cook naked with me."

Mikey laughed, "If we tried to actually cook we'd burn the house down."

"That is probably true, but we'd be naked as we burned."

"I don't think that would make the situation better, Pete."

"It totally would, trust me."

"Okay, I'm sure you're right." Mikey grinned and shook his head, then put his boxers back on. Pete did the same and then they left his room and walked to the kitchen.

"So, have you literally eaten nothing in a week?" Pete asked.

"Well, I mean, I've had like... snacks and shit."

"What sort of snacks?"

"...A handful of frozen corn here and there?"

"That is nowhere near enough food, Mikey."

"I know, I know. I haven't had much of an appetite since..." Mikey's voice trailed off and he looked down at the ground awkwardly.

"Since what?" Pete asked softly.

"I think you know what." Mikey mumbled, still not looking at Pete.

"Yeah, I know. I've been the same. Patrick basically started force feeding me at one point."

Mikey laughed, "Gee just would leave sandwiches in my room with weird drawings. I think that was his way of showing sympathy."

Pete kissed Mikey, then said, "At least we have each other again."

"Yeah, but for how long? Pete, I don't want to continue like this. Barely seeing each other, let alone _speaking_ to each other- it's fucking terrible."

"We'll make it work." Pete kissed him again, "We'll figure out some way to see each other more." Kiss. "I promise, Mikeyway."

Mikey leaned his forehead on Pete's and shut his eyes, "Yeah, we can do this. I love you, Pete."

"I love you too, Mikey." He wrapped his arms around Mikey and kissed his cheek, "Everything's gonna be alright."

Mikey kissed the top of Pete's head, "Yeah, hopefully. We can do this."

"Hell yeah we can."

\----------

They ate in Gerard's room, deciding that Mikey's bed was too gross at the moment. Which was saying something, considering Gerard's bed was nasty. They finished eating and cuddled up, wrapped completely around each other, talking about various things.

"So," Mikey started, "Anything interesting happen to you the past few months?"

"Hmm.... not really. Patrick was basically hugging me constantly for a month straight."

"Really?" Mikey giggled.

"Yeah! It was awesome, actually. I was so fucking emotional, I basically _needed_ a hug 24/7."

"I was the same. Practically locked myself in my room for a month."

"I started crying in school. Someone started joking that Patrick and I were dating and I got overwhelmed thinking about you so... I started crying."

"Oh god, what happened after that?"

"I think people started thinking someone I knew died. They kept giving me these sympathetic looks."

"And here I thought it was bad that Gerard kept trying to shove sandwiches under my door."

"I don't- I don't understand." Pete laughed.

"I believe that was his way of trying to feed me, but the sandwich would always get stuck under my door. He didn't stop trying, though. He wouldn't say anything, either. Just once or twice a day I would see a plate start to appear under my door, followed by lots of cursing and Gerard trying to figure out how to shove a _sandwich_ under my door."

"Gerard's so weird, what the fuck."

"I know! It was nice of him, though. He was just trying to make sure I ate. He just did it in a funny way."

"That's what Patrick was like. He was the only thing stopping me from doing stupid, impulsive things. Stupid, impulsive things like setting Tyler's house on fire."

"That is actually a great idea lets do it."

Pete snuggled closer to Mikey, "Not now, I'm comfy."

"Okay, but later."

"Deal."

They went quiet after that, savoring the moment. Pete was tracing patterns across Mikey's skin, making him close his eyes and shiver slightly. Pete kissed him softly and mumbled, "You know, we weren't together on Valentine's Day."

"Mm, I know." Mikey muttered in reply.

"Means we didn't get to do anything."

"I know... What are you getting at here?" Mikey asked with a laugh.

"I wanna make it up to you." Pete moved so he was on top of Mikey and Mikey bit his lip.

"How are you gonna do that?"

"I'm sure you'll think of something." Pete smirked and kissed Mikey. Mikey ran his hands up and down Pete's side, kissing him deeply. Pete moved down and started kissing his neck, drawing soft gasps from Mikey. He continued moving down, kissing and biting his way down Mikey's chest. It felt amazing and Mikey was so glad Pete was taking it slow. He wanted this feeling to last.

Pete stopped suddenly and looked up at Mikey, asking, "I- Mikey... can I suck your dick?"

"D-do you want to?" Mikey was breathing heavily and looking at Pete with desperation in his eyes.

"Yeah... yeah I want to. Can I?"

"I- uh- yeah. Yeah, fuck, you can."

Pete grinned up at him, "Awesome."

"Do you know what you're doing?"

"Nope." Pete laughed, "Hopefully it won't be too terrible- for either of us."

"Yeah, hopefully." Mikey giggled.

Pete grinned up at Mikey, then mumbled something along the lines of, "Now, let me just..." as he pulled of Mikey's boxers. Mikey watched him and bit his lip nervously. Pete threw his boxers aside, then looked back up at him.

"Still okay?"

"Yeah, it's just a little weird."

"Try being in my position." Pete laughed and Mikey rolled his eyes.

"Are you gonna do this or what?" 

"I am, I am! Just- I don't know. Let me figure out what to do in my head first."

"Okay, okay. Take your time."

"I fucking _will_." He smirked up at Mikey, then wrapped his hand around Mikey's dick and started stroking it slowly. Mikey bit back a moan and balled his hands into fists, still watching Pete. He wrapped his lips around Mikey's dick and flicked his tongue over the head experimentally. Mikey let out a gasp, "Pete, do that again."

"Really? I did good?" Pete grinned.

"Well, I mean, no one has ever done this before so I can't exactly compare it to anything, but it did feel really good."

"Alright, let me try to do it again." Pete took Mikey back into his mouth, going lower this time. He choked a little and pulled back up, but still get his mouth around the tip and started to suck a little.

Mikey moaned and closed his eyes, "Fuck, feels good, Pete."

Pete hummed around Mikey and attempted to take him further into his mouth again. Mikey kept making small noises of pleasure and pulled on Pete's hair slightly. Pete surprised himself by moaning, then pulled off and asked, "Is it bad that I'm enjoying this?"

"You are? Really?" Mikey looked back down at him.

"Yeah, like.... a _lot_." Pete paused, then looked up at Mikey, "Hey, Mikey, you should cum on my face."

"What? Why?"

"It would be so hot. You could cum all over my face and then lick it off. Yeah... yeah that would be so good." Pete practically moaned.

"What the fuck? Where did this come from?" Mikey laughed.

"Please! Oh my god, it'd be _so_ hot! I just- fuck, cum on my face, _please_."

"Your parents must be so proud of you, Pete."

"Shut the fuck up about my parents and cum on my face."

Mikey started laughing harder and Pete slapped his leg.

"Don't laugh at me!"

"I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you I'm just... this time last year I was scared you were homophobic, but now you're begging me to cum on your face. It's hilarious."

Pete started to giggle too and grinned up at Mikey, "Oh the times they are a changin."

"Fucking amazing." Mikey grinned back.

"Anyway, will you or will you not cum on my face?"

"I mean... I guess I can cum on your face if you really want me to."

"Awesome!" Pete's grin widened and Mikey laughed again.

"You look adorable when you're being weird."

"Thank you, I'm glad you think I'm adorable." Pete giggled. He licked at the tip of Mikey's dick slightly, then took him slowly back into his mouth. Mikey bit his lip hard and watched, running his fingers through Pete's hair. Pete wrapped his hand around Mikey's dick and started jacking him off, his mouth still on the head. Mikey closed his eyes and moaned, tugging on Pete's hair lightly. Pete groaned and slowly took more into his mouth, trying not to gag this time. Mikey held onto the sheets with one hand- his other hand still in Pete's hair- his knuckles turning white from his grip.

It wasn't long before Mikey was tugging on Pete's hair, moaning loudly and trying to get out the words "I'm about to cum" unstuck from his tongue. Pete seemed to understand anyway and pulled off, still jacking Mikey off and not moving too far away. Mikey came a moment later, eyes still squeezed shut and mouth hanging open.

When Mikey finally opened his eyes, he saw that Pete was kneeling between his legs, bottom lip between his teeth and cum on his cheek and neck. He looked really fucking hot and Mikey pulled him in for a kiss. He could taste cum on Pete's lips and licked a stripe up his cheek, getting more cum in his mouth. 

"You're so fucking hot, Pete." Mikey mumbled before licking the rest of the cum off his face.

Pete moaned softly and gasped out, "I told you coming on my face would be hot."

"You were totally right." Mikey laughed softly and kissed Pete. He ran his hand down Pete's chest and mumbled against his lips, "I wanna suck you off too."

"You sure? You don't have to if you don't want to."

"No, I want to. C'mon, I know you want me to suck your dick, Pete."

"I can't argue with that." He laughed and Mikey kissed him again. Mikey moved so he was on top of Pete, then started slowly kissing down Pete's body. He pulled off Pete's boxers and looked up at him. His eyes were dark and he was watching Mikey closely, his lip caught between his teeth. Mikey licked his lips and wrapped his hand around Pete's dick. Pete was still watching him and Mikey felt self conscious, like he was doing everything wrong. He swallowed that feeling and hesitantly took Pete into his mouth. It felt weird, having a dick in his mouth, but not necessarily gross. Just weird.

He started moving his hand and tried to replicate whatever Pete had done earlier. It seemed to be working, because Pete was letting out soft moans and gasps above him. Pete pulled his hair and Mikey gasped. He kept his hand on Mikey's head after that, almost as if he was trying to keep him in his place. 

Pete lasted less time then Mikey, soon coming down Mikey's throat. Mikey pulled off and coughed, some of the cum dribbling down his chin. Pete was breathing heavily and pulled Mikey up to kiss him. He licked the cum off Mikey's face and grinned, "Well that was fun."

Mikey laughed and buried his face in Pete's neck, "That's one word for it."

\----------

They were sitting together in the living room, Pete laying down on the couch, his head on Mikey's lap. The front door opened and they both froze, but soon relaxed when they heard Gerard call out, "Why are there roses on the floor?"

He walked into the living room and Pete grinned at him, "I brought those for Mikey."

"But why are they on the floor?"

"I dropped them and have been too distracted to pick them up." Mikey replied.

"Uh huh, right. I'm gonna go to my room, you two should probably clean up and you, Pete, should get ready to leave. Our parents are probably gonna be here in a few hours, so you should leave with enough time."

"Yeah, yeah. We know. He'll get ready in a bit."

Gerard leaned against the doorframe, "Look, I know you guys are reluctant to part, but I highly doubt you want mom and dad to find Pete here cuddled up with you on the couch. So! Get your stuff packed up, Pete. I'm officially kicking you out."

"You're a dick, Gee."

"Love you too, Mikes." Gerard left the room and Pete sighed and sat up.

"He's right, I gotta leave." 

Mikey leaned his head on Pete's shoulder, "Just promise you'll try to hang out with me whenever you can, okay?"

"Yeah, of course I will. I love you, Mikey."

"Love you too, Pete."

"Did you guys fucking _fuck_ on my _bed_?" Gerard yelled, storming back into the living room.

"Whoops." Pete started laughing and Mikey buried his face in Pete's shoulder, trying to hide his giggles.

Gerard glared at them and put his hands on his hips, "Why did you have to use _my_ bed."

"Mine was gross?" Mikey offered.

"And fucking on my bed isn't gross?"

"I mean... to be fair, it wasn't full on _fucking_ , it was more, you know, mouth based."

"Oh god, nope. I don't want to hear this. You guys are disgusting."

"If it makes you feel better, nothing got on your sheets."

"Hah, yeah. Absolutely _nothing_ got on your sheets."

"Wow, you know what? I'm gonna take a shower. I'm gonna take a shower and hope to wash that mental image from my mind. Goodbye, you filthy, filthy boys." Gerard left the living room again, muttering something like, "I can't believe they used _my_ bed..." as he left.

Mikey burst into laughter and Pete shook his head, saying, "I wonder how he figured it out?"

"He probably has some sort of weird sixth sense for this sort of thing."

"...He can sense when someone had sex on his bed?"

"No, I was thinking something closer to he can sense when someone, other than him, made his bed dirty."

"I actually wouldn't be surprised if that was the case."

"Yeah, me neither. But, uh, you probably should get ready to leave, Pete. Not that I want you to leave it's just... you know... _parents_."

"Yeah, I know." Pete sighed, "I just wish I could stay with you longer."

"Me too. But it's okay, we will make this work. I'm not ready to give up on us yet."

Pete smiled softly, "Me neither. We can figure something out."

"Yeah, we totally can."

\----------

Mikey was tempted to just keep Pete locked in his room, but soon realized that would not be a good idea. He still was very reluctant to let Pete leave, though. They kept going back to kiss and hug each other, until Gerard basically forced Pete out of the house. Mikey was back to feeling shitty, but he knew this would happen. At least he got to see Pete again, got to tell him he loved him. He might miss Pete more after this, though. But he could handle it. He would _have_ to handle it.

Mikey was sitting on Gerard's bed- his sheets stripped and in the washing machine- and asked, "So, what did you do with Frank?"

"Well," Gerard sat beside Mikey, "We watched a lot of movies. Also cuddled a lot. He has a lot of dogs. Like, a _lot_ of dogs. I walked in and was basically trampled by his dogs."

"Holy shit, really?"

"Yeah, really. They were all adorable."

"Not surprising, dogs usually are cute."

"Yeah." Gerard smiled to himself and Mikey nudged him with his elbow.

"So, do you guys only cuddle and watch movies?"

"Well, you know, we also made out a little. Or a lot. Okay, to be honest, I kept panicking and locking myself in his bathroom to hyperventilate for a few minutes whenever we made out."

"So... I take it sex definitely did not happen?"

Gerard giggled, "Of course not, silly. That's a sin and I would _never_ -"

"Suureee, 'course you would never."

"Only after marriage, Mikey."

"Whoops, I guess I'm a sinner then."

"Disgusting." Gerard laughed and shoved Mikey.

"You totally knew it was gonna happen!"

"That doesn't mean I wanna think about it! Or have it happen _on my bed_."

"Are you still not over that?"

"Of course I'm not over it! You are disgusting."

"But nothing got on your shee-"

" _DISGUSTING_." Gerard pushed Mikey off his bed, both of them starting to laugh loudly. Mikey just stayed on the ground, laughing and looking up at Gerard.

Even if he didn't have Pete, at least he would always have Gerard there for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo so hmu on tumblr (transboykobrakid.tumblr.com) if u wanna talk or just see my descent into hell alright bye


	11. Ephesians 5:11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "That... isn't surprising. But still, I feel like burning something in a church is like bad luck or something."
> 
> "Even if it's just silly bandz?" Ashley asked with a laugh.
> 
> "Silly bandz especially. They're a sacred item."
> 
> "Bill, stop being fucking dumb and join us in the Burning of the Sacred Silly Bandz."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i've been so shit at updating recently i've been.... okay i have no excuse i'm just terrible

It was getting close to Gerard's birthday and he felt it was about time he started to plan a party. He usually never did anything big- preferring just having a few friends over for a sleepover than a large party- but it was his 18th birthday so he thought hey, why not have a big thing?

But, of course, it wouldn't be anything too wild. The worst thing that had ever happened at a party of his was that one time Mikey and Pete threw up from drinking too much lemonade. Which happened at his 13th birthday party. It was a wild time.

There also was that time he almost made out with Ray, but they don't talk about that party anymore. 

Gerard was also feeling way worse about his gender and body- well, worse than his usual level of self loathing. He wanted to talk to _someone_ about it, but he felt like his friends wouldn't really understand. What he needed was trans friends, but it's not like a homeschooler with overwhelming anxiety who only ever goes to church could easily get trans friends. It fucking sucked, but usually he just dealt with it in silence.

Well, usually.

Frank was over one night- cuddled up with Gerard on his bed and watching some dumb horror movie- when Gerard looked at him and said, "Frank."

Frank turned to look at Gerard and raised a questioning eyebrow, asking, "Yes?"

"Why am I trans?"

"I... I don't know, Gee." Frank was looking at him weirdly and Gerard sighed, leaning his head on Frank's shoulder.

"This sucks."

"I'm sorry."

"Why am I not a cis girl? Do you even like me? I mean, you're _gay_ , Frank. I'm not a guy. Why do you wanna be with me?"

Frank bit his lip, his face turning serious, as if he was in deep thought. He finally shrugged and looked back at Gerard, "I don't know, you're kinda awesome, Gee. And like... this probably sounds stupid, but I'd totally go straight for you, babe."

Gerard giggled and buried his face in Frank's neck, mumbling, "You're an idiot. A fucking awesome idiot."

"I've been called worse." Frank laughed.

Gerard kissed him softly, then pulled away and said, "Hey, Frank?"

"Yeah?"

"You sure you don't just see me as a boy?"

"I'm sure." Frank kissed him again and they stayed like that for a while, kissing and completely ignoring the movie. 

After a little bit, Gerard pulled away and said, "Uhm... Frank?"

"Yeah?" Frank laughed.

"Oh, uh, sorry, I just- Can you.... can you not call me Gerard? Like, can you only call me Gee?"

"Yeah, of course I can. Anything else?"

"Can you uhm... can you also use they/them pronouns for me? Like... not around church people, but around me and Mikey or just yeah if you ever talk about me?"

Frank kissed them on the cheek, then said, "Of course."

\----------

Gee was inviting people at church to their party. They were inviting everyone- everyone minus Tyler, of course- and telling them all to bring friends too (if they wanted), meaning this party would probably be somewhat big. Of course it would also be held at the church, because for some fucking reason literally _everything_ happened at church, even if it wasn't church relate in the slightest.

Gee really wanted to invite Pete, though. Not because they were the best of friends or anything, but they just wanted to do something for Mikey. Their mom would get pissed, though. But they were turning 18 and Pete _was_ a friend, so their mom could deal.

"Hey, Pete, you coming to my party?" Gee asked.

Pete looked at them questioningly and replied, "I- uh.... would your parents be fine with that?"

"Eh, probably not. But like... I mean, you're my friend too so my parents can fight me if they don't like it."

"Oh," Pete laughed, "Well, yeah, I'll come to your party."

"Alright, awesome!" Gee turned to walk away, but stopped and winked at Pete, saying, "Oh, and I'll make sure no one pays too close attention to you and Mikey."

"Oh my god."

"You should be happy about that!"

"I am it's just... I don't know, weird."

"Weird like fucking on my bed?"

Pete covered his face with his hands and groaned, "Oh c'mon! Will you ever let that go?"

"Nope, absolutely not. You should buy me a new bed."

"I'm not gonna buy you a new bed."

"I will continuously ask you for a new bed for the rest of my life. Even when I die and become I will _haunt_ your ass and demand a new bed. Fucking watch me."

"Why does Pete need to get you a new bed?" Ray asked, walking up to them.

"Absolutely _no_ reason." Pete glared at Gee and they started giggling.

"Oh, that is a private matter. A _very_ private matter. Very private matter between Pete and Mike-"

"Would you stop?"

Gee grinned, "Nah, I think I'd like to continue."

"Wait, did Pete and Mikey..?" Ray asked, starting to laugh.

Pete turned crimson and hid his face in his hands, making Ray laugh harder and pat him on the shoulder.

"I can't believe you did that on Gerard's _bed_. Man, I see why he wants you to buy him a new one."

"Nothing got on the sheets, though."

"For some reason that makes it just seem... weirder." 

"What? We didn't even like have actual sex on his bed, we just, y'know, did stuff..."

"That's still totally gross, dude."

" _You're_ totally gross.

Gee patted them both on the head and said, "Alright, kiddos, that's enough. I think we can _all_ agree that Pete and Mikey need to buy me a new bed. Agreed? Agreed."

"I don't agre-"

"Yes, yes you do, Pete. Anyway, I am expecting the new bed by my birthday party, so get on it, Wentz!"

"That isn't gonna happen."

Gee patted Pete on the head again, "Yes it is."

\----------

It was Gee's birthday and they were feeling.... well, kinda shitty, to be honest. Not like this was anything new, things like this never seemed to be as enjoyable to Gee as to everyone else. But they would put on a happy face and pretend everything was alright like they always do.

Gee and Mikey were setting up for the party- and by "setting up" they meant pouring chips into a bowl and eating them before anyone arrived. It was half an hour before the party officially started, but Nate showed up anyway. He was the kid who always showed up way too early and then was surprised when they weren't ready. Gee didn't really care though; they were just happy that the giant room didn't feel as empty anymore. 

Soon, more people started showing up. Gee grinned when they saw Frank, then ran over and hugged him.

"Hey, Frank!" Gee beamed.

"Hey! I can't believe you're 18 what the fuck. You're like..... ancient." Frank laughed.

"Shut up, I'm only like... 2 years older than you."

"You're still old as fuck."

Gee rolled their eyes, "You're an idiot. Remind me again why I'm dating you?"

"It's 'cause I'm super cute." Frank winked.

"Damn, you got me there."

Frank winked again, before Mikey came up and wrapped his arm around Frank's shoulder.

"So, So I hear you and Gee are officially dating. I have some things to say because Gee did the same thing with me and Pete and this is revenge. If you hurt Gerard I'll kill you blah blah blah aftercare is important treat the bruises right after don't choke too hard remember to use condoms when dealing with dildos and shit blah blah blah."

Frank looked at Mikey weirdly, "What do you think me and Gee are gonna be doing..?"

Mikey patted Frank's shoulder, "Let's just say I know Gerard."

Frank laughed and looked at Gee questioningly, making Gee blush and say, "Hah, good one, Mikey. Time for you to go away now."

"You know it's true, dude."

"Ahaha! So funny! Time for you to go!" Gee pushed Mikey away, then turned back to Frank, "You can ignore him, he was just being a little shit."

"So, no truth in what he was saying?" Frank smirked.

"Nope, absolutely nothing."

Frank looked at Gee knowingly, then said, "Choking? Really?"

Gee groaned and covered their face with their hands, "No...."

"Why don't I believe you?"

Gee looked back at him, "Because you know I'm a kinky little shit?"

"Ah, yes, that's why."

"I heard the words 'kinky little shit' and I have been summoned." Pete said from behind Gee, making them jump. 

"Oh dear! Pete, fuck, you scared me!"

"Did you just say 'oh dear?' Frank, I hate to break this to you, but... you're dating an old woman." Pete laughed.

"Man, if he is an old woman that makes things a _little_ weird."

Gee slapped Pete's arm, "Oh, shush, I'm not an old woman, dick."

"You sure sound like one."

"Oh my god."

"...Pete?" Mikey was looking between Pete and Gee in confusion. 

Pete rubbed the back of his neck and laughed, "I, uh, Gerard invited me. Since we're, you know, friends or whatever."

"Oh, uh, yeah. Uhm, so... you're here."

"Yeah, I'm here." Pete smiled at Mikey and they both looked like they wanted to hug the other.

Gee turned to Frank and said, "Frank, help me make a human shield so no one can see these two nerds hug."

"Yeah, but that would be a totally unsatisfactory hug. Get Toro and we can make a human shield so no one can see them sneak off to the bathroom so they can _really_ hug."

"Where is Ray anyway?" Gee looked around the room, but didn't see Ray anywhere, "Where is that motherfucker?"

"I don't think he's here." Frank laughed.

"That bastard! I told him to get here early for emotional support." Gee shook their head in disappointment.

"Why would you need emotional support?" Frank asked.

"You know... birthdays."

"That doesn't really explain anything."

"Gee has a lot of emotional issues." Mikey said, patting Gee on the head.

"Wow, thanks, Mikey."

"Anytime!" Mikey giggled and Gee shoved him.

"Okaayy... I'm gonna go-" Frank waved his hand non-committedly and walked away from them.

Gee watched him go and started to panic. They turned to Mikey and shoved him, whispering angrily, "Why would you say that?"

"Dude, calm down, I was just joking. Don't have to get pissy about it." 

"Yeah but what if he's weirded out now?" Gee looked back at Frank- who was now talking to Ashley- and bit their lip nervously. It's not that they really minded what Mikey said, he didn't say any of the specifics, they just were scared of losing Frank. Like, _really_ scared. So scared that they almost wanted to ruin it on purpose so it wouldn't hurt as much when Frank did go. Fuck, it had only been a month and they already were on the verge of sabotaging their relationship with Frank. Why did they have to be like this? 

Fuck, now they would be weird for the rest of the night.

Fuck _fuck_ Frank was supposed to stay over that night. Gee had almost forgotten, having been distracted by other things. They just hoped Frank didn't bring up what Mikey had said. Maybe he wasn't even thinking about it? Maybe he just passed it off as just a joke? 

Maybe he didn't want to break up with Gee.

But why would he want to stay with them? They were good for nothing, just a random nerdy shut-in with way too many problems for anyone to actually want to deal with. Oh, he might be okay with Gee now, but what if Gee has a breakdown and unloads everything onto Frank in the middle of the night? It has happened before... Well, no one left them, but it _could_ happen. If anyone actually saw what they were really like, not just the person they put up for appearances, why would they _want_ to stay?

Gee was... Gee was unstable. They never knew what would happen each day. It could be as simple as feeling numb for a whole day, or something like them feeling like they were being burned alive. It wasn't really the sort of thing they wanted anyone else to fully know about. Mikey and Ray knew bits- Mikey more than Ray- but they still weren't sure if they wanted to say- to _confess_ to everything. 

"Yo, Gee, you look all spaced out. What's up?" Frank's voice interrupted their train of thought and they jumped slightly, not expecting anyone to talk to them. Which was fucking _dumb_ since it was their _birthday_ party jesus christ they had to focus. Breathe. Push all thoughts to the side.

"Oh, nothing. Just, y'know, lost in my thoughts and shit."

"Nice," Frank laughed, "What were you thinking about?"

"Just.... things."

"Damn, why so mysterious? Were you thinking dirty thoughts?" Frank wiggled his eyebrows.

Gee giggled and shoved him lightly, "No, you idiot, I wasn't thinking dirty thoughts. Opposed to common belief, I'm not actually an extremely sex-focused person. I think about other things too."

"Okay, well what were you thinking about before, when you looked all spacey and shit."

"I don't know," Gee waved their hand randomly, " _Things_."

"Fine, don't tell me. I'm just gonna assume you were thinking about kinky things."

Gee laughed and punched Frank on the arm playfully, "Asshole."

"What? I feel like it's a pretty safe assumption, especially since you won't _tell_ _me_."

Gee rolled their eyes, "Do I have to tell you everything I think about?"

"Well, no, of course you don't. You just looked sad and this is my dumb way of trying to make sure you're alright."

"Oh." Gee wasn't expecting that. It's not like no one ever checked in on them to make sure they were okay, they just hadn't expected Frank to care enough to ask. 

"So... are you? Alright, I mean."

"I mean... I guess." Gee shrugged. Now wasn't the time to get into the complicated topic of whether Gee was "alright" or not.

"That doesn't sound like you're alright... Is everything okay?"

Ah, the other dreaded question: "is everything okay?" Time's like these Gee just wishes they could have a large, neon sign that says "STOP ASKING HOW I'M DOING" that they could carry around everywhere. Well, that might get heavy after a while, but something along those lines. They accidentally snapped at Frank, saying, "I don't know, probably? Okay for me, I guess. Can we talk about this later? I'm not in the mood."

Frank looked guilty and quickly said, "Oh, yeah, sorry. I just- yeah, nevermind."

Gee berated themselves internally, then said, "No, don't be sorry I just... fuck, I don't know. Another time, okay?"

"Yeah, okay." Frank gave them a small smile, then said, "Fuck, sometimes I really want to just _kiss_ you. Like, a lot. For instance, I really want to kiss you right now."

Gee blushed, "Seriously?"

"Duh." Frank rolled his eyes, "Stop being surprised when I show interest in you. You _are_ my girlfriend, afterall."

"Sorry, sorry! I can't help being surprised." Gee laughed, not mentioning the butterflies they got when Frank called them his girlfriend.

"Pfft, you're such a nerd. A cute nerd, but a nerd nonetheless." 

"Yeah? Well, you'r-"

"Yo, Gerard!" Josh said, approaching Frank and Gee, "Remember forever ago when you said you hated silly bandz? Well, I totally bought you silly bandz."

"You left out the best part!" Ashley grinned, standing beside Josh, "We also got you a box of matches."

 "Ah, shit, nice!" Gee grabbed the box of matches from Ashley and shook them in Frank's face, "Let's go burn shit."

"Wait, be responsible when you burn shit, Gerard. We don't want anyone dying at your party, now do we?" Josh said with a laugh.

"Uhm, that's _exactly_ what I want."

Frank leaned his head on Gee's shoulder, "But who do we kill?"

"I vote Josh. He's a total nerd. Like, have you seen his blue hair? Total loser."

Josh pouted, "Wow, I'm extremely offended, guys. I'm gonna go sulk in the bathroom."

"It's true, you are a total nerd. Blue hair sucks." Ashley grinned.

"Ashley, I hate to break this to you but... you have blue hair."

Ashley gasped dramatically, "I do not!"

Josh laughed and shoved her slightly, "Yes you do!"

Ashley started laughing too and shoved him back. Gee turned to Frank and asked, "You wanna go outside and burn some shit?"

"Fuck yeah!"

"Wait, I wanna but shit too!" Ashley said, turning her attention back to Gee.

"Well, of course you can. You did bring the matches, you blue haired angel." Gee replied.

"Why did you call me a blue haired angel?"

Gee winked at Josh, "Josh knows."

Josh groaned and rolled his eyes, "You're the worst, dude."

"Wow, Frankie, you hear that? He insulted me. On my birthday." Gee shook their head disapprovingly.

"How rude! I guess we really should kill him, since he's such a dick."

Ashley wrapped her arms around Josh, "Hey! No killing my boyfriend!"

A grin started to slowly spread across Gee's face and they wiggled their eyebrows at Josh, saying, "Did I hear her correctly? Are you guys dating?"

Josh rolled his eyes, "Maybe."

Ashley slapped him on the arm, "It's more than a _maybe_ , dick."

"Okay, fine, we are dating. Happy, Gerard?"

"I am! This is the best gift ever! I remember when he first started crushing on you, Ashley." Gee wiped a fake tear from their eye, "It feels like so long ago."

"Okay, yeah, whatever. Can we go burn stuff now?"

Gee laughed, "Yeah, fine. We can go burn stuff. But man, that was so long ago! I mean, it wasn't actually that long ago, but it was pretty long ago. Frank hadn't even come to church at that point."

They started walking outside and Josh said, "Wait, was he seriously not here? When did he start coming?" he turned to Frank, "Frank, when did you start coming?"

"Uhm, like... November? I think? I remember it was soon after my birthday."

"Is your birthday in October or something?" Ashley asked.

"It's on Halloween."

"What?" Gee grinned at Frank, "Seriously? Shit, that's so cool! Why didn't you tell me? You know that I'm a huge slut for anything horror related."

Frank laughed and shrugged, "I don't know, I just didn't think about it. I probably would've told you when it got to October."

"Pfft, you suck. I told you my birthday."

"You told me a week before your party, Gee."

Gee put their finger over Frank's lips, "Shh, it still totally counts as me telling you."

Frank bit Gee's finger and Gee yelped and pulled it away quickly. They glared at Frank and asked, "Why'd you do that?"

"I don't know, it just seemed right."

"You're weird."

"No, _you're_ weird."

"Wow, looks like we aren't the only ones who are dating, Josh." Ashley said with a laugh.

"I- what? We aren't- I mean...." Gee stuttered out and Ashley patted them on the shoulder.

"It's cool, dude. I'm bi. Your secret is safe with me."

Josh shrugged, "I just don't really care. Also, I totally saw this coming."

"How did you see this coming?" Gee asked.

"Uhm, you two would flirt constantly. It was disgusting. Still is, actually."

Frank started laughing and leaned his head on Gee's shoulder, "Shit, Gee, I think everyone knows."

"We gotta be more secretive, Frank."

"Awh, but I was planning on getting up in front of the entire church and making out with you!"

"As great as that sounds, I don't think it'd be the best idea."

"Can I at least kiss you now?"

Gee shrugged, "I guess, everyone is inside."

"Everyone but us. We _are_ here, ya know." Ashley said.

"Yeah, but you already said you wouldn't snitch, so _hah_." Frank grinned triumphantly, then pulled Gee in for a kiss. Gee giggled at first, but kissed him back. They heard Josh groan and started laughing again. They pulled away from Frank and said, "Okay, I think that's enough annoying Josh and Ashley."

"But annoying people is my hobby."

"You need better hobbies, Frank." Gee laughed.

"So, are you lovebirds done being gross now? Let's set some silly bandz on fire!" Ashley sat on the ground and patted the spot beside her. Josh followed her lead and sat next to her, then threw a pack of silly bandz at Gee.

"Start burning, Gerard. I wanna see these things get _destroyed_." Josh said with a grin.

Gee laughed and sat down- Frank sitting next to them- then ripped open the packet and set one on fire. They let the fire get so it was almost touching their fingers then let it fall to the ground. They always had liked the way fire looked, even if they were burning something that smelled bad. It was just so hypnotizing, they could light a candle and stare into the flame for hours. They also had a habit of setting stuff on fire for fun, usually just pieces of paper they didn't need but sometimes bigger things. They just liked to watch things burn.

Frank grabbed the matches and set another silly band on fire, giggling loudly. The four of them continued doing this for a while, until William came outside and asked, "What are you guys doing?"

"We're absolutely not setting shit on fire." Gee replied.

"I can smell the smoke, Gerard, and I can see the burnt matches."

"Well what are you gonna do about it?" Gee grinned up at him.

"I'm gonna be a responsible adult and make you come inside."

"Okay... but I'm an adult now too, soo..."

"Yes, but you're the one who's burning shit outside of a church."

"You suck, Bill."

"No, you do. Now come on, come inside. I mean, this _is_ your party."

"That doesn't mean anything, Bill. I've locked myself in a bathroom during parties before."

"That... isn't surprising. But still, I feel like burning something in a church is like bad luck or something."

"Even if it's just silly bandz?" Ashley asked with a laugh.

"Silly bandz _especially_. They're a sacred item."

"Bill, stop being fucking dumb and join us in the Burning of the Sacred Silly Bandz."

William started kicking at Gee's back slightly, "No, now get up. You're gonna go to hell for burning the Sacred Silly Bandz."

"Fight me, William."

"I _wil_ -" William was interrupted by the sound of sirens getting closer. They all looked up to see an ambulance pull up to the bingo place across the street.

"Oh, I wonder what happened there?" William asked with concern.

"Hopefully nothing too bad." Josh said.

"Yeah, we can pray. But, anyway, come back inside, stop burning stuff, be an adult."

"I will absolutely _not_ be an adult!" Gee said defiantly.

William laughed, "Okay, fair enough. But still, stop burning stuff."

Gee rolled their eyes, "Fine, we'll stop. But I won't like it."

Gee walked back inside and saw that the party was thriving without them. They were almost disappointed to see that people didn't need them to have fun even at their own birthday party. I mean, sure they were the ones who secluded themselves outside to burn stuff, but they still wish people would feel their absence. 

Hayley ran up to Gee and said, "Hey, man, there you are! I wanted to wish you a happy birthday but I couldn't find you."

"Yeah, I was outside with Josh, Ashley, and Frank burning stuff, but Bill made us come inside." Gee replied.

"What? Why?"

"Apparently it wasn't 'responsible adult' behavior."

Hayley laughed, "That's dumb, I don't think you could ever be a responsible adult."

"Wow, thanks, Hayley."

"It's true!" 

Gee rolled their eyes, then noticed Pete stumbling out of the bathroom, his hair a complete mess and looking around quickly. Soon after, Mikey also left the bathroom in basically the same state as Pete. Gee laughed to themselves and walked over to Pete and Mikey.

"You guys are kinda bad at this 'hiding that you're still together' thing."

Mikey turned bright red and said, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean, you both just walked out of the bathroom together looking like you were just making out."

"Well whatcha gonna do about it, Way?" Pete asked with a laugh.

"Absolutely nothing. You two deserve time together." Gee put their hand on Pete's shoulder, "Except not on my bed."

"When are you gonna drop that?"

"Never. Enjoy the party!" Gee grinned and walked away from them, back to where Frank was. Frank grinned at them and said, "Looks like your asshole best friend still isn't here."

"I know! Honestly, I'm very offended. I'm gonna put glitter in his fro. That'll show him."

"Ah, shit, that's like... the ultimate revenge. He'll still have it stuck in his hair for years in the future."

Gee nodded approvingly, "I want him to still have glitter in his hair when he's an old man."

"I feel like he would anyway, even if you didn't put the glitter in his hair yourself."

"That's... that's probably true. But, we should go see if we can find glitter, I wanna get back at this asshole."

"You should kill him, that'd show him."

"Yeah, but I have every reason to kill him."

Frank laughed and the two of them started walking together out of the party and towards the kids room. Gee bit their lip and held Frank's hand, not looking at him directly. Frank squeezed their hand softly and Gee looked at him, smiling slightly. Frank leaned his head on Gee's shoulder and said, "Have I ever told you that you're adorable?"

Gee blushed crimson, "I'm not... I'm not adorable. I'm all weird and gross and shit."

"Nah, you're definitely adorable."

"Okay, well, _you're_ more adorable."

"Gee, it is _literally impossible_ to be more adorable than you."

"Puppies are more adorable than me!" Gee said triumphantly.

"It's literally impossible for any _human_ to be more adorable than you."

Gee shoved Frank, letting go of his hand, and laughed, "Are you blind? You should get your eyes checked, you probably have really bad vision."

"Stop being self-deprecating, you're like... super cute and hot at the same time. It's actually annoying, to be honest."

Gee rolled their eyes, "Oh shush, no I'm not. I'm like the ugly one in this relationship."

They got to the kids room and Gee separated from Frank, looking around for glitter. Frank went over to them, though, and hugged them from the back.

"You aren't the ugly one, Gee." Frank mumbled into Gee's ear. Gee shivered slightly and turned to look at Frank. He wrapped his arms around Gee's neck and kissed them deeply, taking them by surprise. Frank pulled away for a moment to repeat, "You're not the ugly one." then kissed them again. Gee hadn't felt this way in- well, _ever_. They actually felt that maybe, just maybe, they actually were worth something. 

Frank pulled away again and leaned his forehead on Gee's. Gee was breathless, eyes closed and panting lightly. Frank ran his fingers through their hair and said, "You're fucking beautiful, Gee. I'm not just saying that to make you feel better, I mean it. I know you... I know you have trouble with self-doubt and stuff. I mean, you haven't said it directly, but I can tell from how you react to things and I just- I don't know. I wanna make you see how much you're worth, because... because you mean a lot to me and it's fucking dumb that you don't see how amazing you are. 'Cause you're really amazing, Gee. Like... _really_  amazing. I'm kinda fucking surprised you like me back, to be honest."

"Why? I'm just... just this fucked up loser. I'm surprised _you_ like _me_ back."

"Listen, I don't care how fucked up you are, because you are still amazing to me no matter what shit you have to deal with." Frank kissed them again quickly, then added, "You don't even have to tell me any specifics of your fucked up-ness right now if you don't want to. Hell, you never have to tell me if you don't want to."

_You're gonna find out eventually, babe_ , Gee thought, deciding it'd be a bad idea to actually say that. They ended up just shrugging and pushing away from him, not sure how to react. Frank's eyes seemed so _honest_ when he said those things, it was fucking eerie. And surprising. Like... really _really_ surprising. So surprising they weren't sure if they believed Frank. He did seem like he meant it, but you never know. Humans aren't exactly the most trustworthy creatures.

Frank reached out his arm to pull Gee back to him, but they moved further away from him. They were panicking- panicking because they had no fucking idea how to react to this. Now they were scared for a completely new reason: it would hurt so fucking much when Frank left, and they were pretty positive Frank would leave eventually. Even if he didn't realize it, Gee was a fucking hassle to deal with. They had terrible mood swings and has a shitty memory and would probably push him away before he could get too close.

But he already was too close. He was too close and Gee was absolutely fucked. They never had someone get this close to them- well, in this way. There was Ray and Mikey, but... but they were different. They had know Gee for so long that by now they probably are just too stubborn to leave. But Frank was different. Frank would leave. Even if he didn't realize it now, he would leave. They know he would.

"Are you okay, Gee?" Frank's voice was quiet and Gee barely noticed it, too caught up in their thoughts.

"Yeah... Yeah, I'm okay." Gee lied, not looking at Frank, too scared of what they might see. They busied themselves looking for glitter, not liking the feeling of Frank starring at them. They eventually found some and turned back towards Frank, still not looking him in the eye. They smiled slightly- a pathetic attempt to make themselves seem alright- and said, "We probably should go back to the party, people will probably wonder where we went."

"Yeah, okay." Fuck, fuck, _fuck_ \- they ruined everything, didn't they? Of fucking course they did, they always ruin everything. All it takes is five fucking minutes for them to ruin the best thing that had happened to them in forever. Gee kept their head down as the two of them walked back to the party, clutching the glitter tightly in their hands.

It was such a different mood from when they had first walked out of the party, a sour note hanging in the air around them. When they got back to the party, Gee immediately left Frank's side and went into the bathroom, locking themselves in their. They hit their head against the wall a few times, muttering, "Fucking idiot. You have to ruin everything, don't you? Motherfucking _idiot_."

Gee slid down the wall and curled up into a ball on the ground. They had to compose themselves, they couldn't keep having fucking breakdowns at their fucking birthday parties. At least usually no one saw them like this, but Frank did. 

Frank saw.

Jesus christ- They had hoped to hide this from him, or at least hide most of it. But he saw, he probably is already regretting getting with Gee in the first place. He's probably fucking glad that they locked themselves in the bathroom. Everyone's probably glad. Everyone probably just came because they had nothing better to do. Why else would they come? It's not like anyone actually _liked_ Gee.

Fuck, they shouldn't have had this party. It was a bad idea. A fucking _bad_ idea. 

Shit, Frank was supposed to spend the night. Goddammit- they should just cancel. Say that the reason they were in the bathroom for so long was because they were throwing up. But that wouldn't work, Frank would know the truth. He would know and he would hate them more for lying.

Gee got up off the ground, deciding they probably should stop being a goddamn idiot and leave the bathroom. They looked in the mirror quickly, making sure they didn't look too terrible. Funny enough, they actually looked alright. No obvious signs that something was wrong. Good, they didn't want anyone to know.

They tried to push their worries to the back of their mind and left the bathroom. Everything would be fine. No one- _but Frank_ , Gee's mind reminded them- would know what had just happened. 

Everything seemed to be fine and Gee noticed that Ray was finally there. They walked over to him and said, "Hey, Ray, you're finally here! Why the fuck are you so late, asshole?"

Ray laughed sheepishly, "You know... traffic? Also, I was buying your gift."

Gee rolled their eyes, "Why did you wait until the day of my party to buy a gift for me?"

"Well.... I forgot to do it earlier." 

"You're an idiot."

Ray shrugged, "Yeah, maybe. But, why are you holding glitter?"

Gee looked down and noticed that they were, in fact, still holding the glitter. They grinned at Ray and replied, "I was gonna dump it in your hair as revenge."

"Please don't."

"Too late!" Gee quickly took off the cap and poured it all over Ray, making him scream and try to run away from them. But, the damage was already done. Ray's head was now covered in glitter, it falling off of him as he ran away from Gee. 

Gee laughed and called out, "You're getting glitter everywhere!"

"This is your fault, Way!"

"I don't care!" 

Ray turned towards them and glared, then a grin slowly spread across his face. He ran back over to Gee and hugged them tightly, effectively also covering them in glitter. Gee laughed more and tried to push him away, but he just shook his head and got more glitter on them.

"Oh my god, would you stop?" Gee said through giggles, trying in vain to push Ray away.

"Nope, you're stuck with me. This is my revenge to your revenge."

"Jesus, you guys are getting glitter _everywhere_. There's fucking glitter in my soda." Frank said, making Gee's stomach drop. They had momentarily forgotten about the shit with Frank, but no it was all coming back to them.

Ray pulled away from Gee and turned to Frank, saying, "Your turn!" before he hugged Frank. Frank screamed and tried pushing him away, but it was even harder for him because of the height difference. When Ray finally pulled away, Frank was glaring at him in annoyance- which looked very ridiculous, considering he had pink glitter all over himself.

"You suck, Ray."

"Hey, blame Gerard. He was the one who poured glitter on me in the first place."

"That's true, I will blame Gee." Frank grinned at Gee and they felt their stomach drop again.

This was dumb. Why was he acting normal? They figured he would act differently. Maybe he was just doing what they were doing: pretending everything was fine, when internally everything was not fine.

Gee laughed awkwardly and shrugged, "What can I say? I like glitter."

"You like it _too_ much, Gee. Do you know how long it takes to get glitter out of curly hair? Like a fucking year. You suck."

"Eh, I don't care. You're gonna be fabulous." 

"You're the worst. Where's Mikey? I'm gonna hang out with the better Way."

Gee looked around, then shrugged again, "Don't know. Maybe he's making out with Pete again."

"Hm... yeah, probably. I'm gonna go look for him." Ray walked away, leaving Frank and Gee alone. 

Gee shifted uncomfortably and looked everywhere but Frank. They wished he wouldn't bring up what happened earlier, they wished really fucking hard.

"Hey, uhm, so did I... Did I do something wrong? What did I say that upset you so much?"

Well, fuck. Just goes to show that wishing never works. Gee rubbed the back of their neck nervously, looked at him- still not looking him in the eye- and replied, "Uhm, you didn't do anything wrong. Don't worry, I'm just- I don't know. Nothing's wrong, I'm not upset."

"Well you _seem_ upset..." Frank mumbled and Gee started to panic again. They didn't want Frank to think he had done anything, it was all on Gee. Gee was the idiot here, not Frank.

"Seriously, I'm not upset. It's okay, you didn't do anything wrong, I promise."

"You sure?" Frank looked Gee in the eye and they had to try their hardest to not look away.

"Yeah, I'm sure." Gee even smiled to prove to Frank that they were 100% okay, even though they totally weren't.

Frank smiled back and said, "Thank god, I thought that I'd have to cancel the sleepover tonight- which I really don't want to do, by the way. I just didn't want to upset you more."

"Yeah, don't worry. You're still staying over, as far as I'm concerned." Well, guess they would be faking for a long time. Fuck, this was going to be exhausting.

That train of thought was interrupted by Pete running in and yelling, "The cops are here! Quick, hide!" 

"Why are the cops here?" Ashley asked.

"They aren't _here_." Mikey replied, walking up behind Pete, "They're across the street at the bingo place."

"Why are cops at the bingo place?"

Mikey shrugged, "Maybe there was a brawl."

"At a _bingo_ place?"

"You never know with those bingo-types."

"Wait," Josh said, "Why would the cops come into a church? You're acting like they're gonna raid our party. That's in a _church_. We aren't even being loud, Pete."

"That doesn't mean anything, I've been to a church thing that gets raided by cops all the time."

"Pete, it's not raided by cops. They come in and play foosball with you." Patrick said.

"Same thing."

"That isn't the same thing in the slightest, dude." Mikey laughed.

"It's close enough."

Mikey shoved him playfully, "You're an idiot."

"But I'm cute, so I totally get away with it."

"Okay, that's true."

Ray walked back over to Gee and Frank and said, "I'm back, the other brother was being super gross with Pete."

Pete, Patrick, and Mikey also walked over, Mikey saying, "We weren't being gross! We were just sitting outside, asshole."

"Pete was sitting on you, Mikey."

"That means _nothing_."

"Wait, what are you holding?" Gee interrupted, noticing for the first time that Ray was holding a bag.

"It's your gift." Ray replied.

"Why is it in a Walmart bag?"

"I just bought it from Walmart.

"Oh," Gee laughed, "Makes sense."

"I hope you like it, though."

"What is it?"

"It's a book about cheese."

Gee started laughing, "What? Why?"

"I saw it and thought of you." Ray said with a grin, handing Gee the bag.

"I'm flattered, oh my god." Gee looked in the bag and added, "There's also cheese in here."

"Yeah, I figured you'd be mad if I got you a book of cheese, but didn't actually give you cheese."

"You know me so well, Ray."

\----------

Gee was extremely fidgety on the drive back to their house. Mikey and Frank were talking, but Gee didn't know what about. They were caught up in their own thoughts, driving on autopilot and trying not to think about what had happened at the party.

It was dumb, wasn't it? To freak out that much because of what Frank had said? There was no logical reason to freak out. But, then again, logic wasn't exactly Gee's forte. Most of their thought process was a jumbled mess of anxiety and paranoia, so there wasn't much room for logic. 

Gee pulled up to their house and quickly got out of the car, walking quickly to their room. They were panicking again, that was obvious, and wanted to at least calm down a little before they were alone with Frank.

Gee sat down on their bed and covered their face with their hands, breathing heavily and praying to god that Frank wouldn't walk through the door. But of course he would Why wouldn't he? It would make no fucking sense for him _not_ to come in. Jesus, they felt like they couldn't breathe. Why were they like this? Why were they-

"Shit, are you okay? Gee, what's wrong?" Frank kneeled in front of Gee and put his hand on their knee. They opened their eyes and looked him in the eye. He looked worried- maybe a little scared, too- and Gee started to feel guilty.

"I'm-" They had to stop to take a deep breath and closed their eyes again. Breathe in, then out. In and out. In and out. When they finally started to feel more calm, they opened their eyes to look back at Frank. He looked even more scared and Gee felt awful. They pushed him away and stood up, walking to the other side of the room.

"I'm okay. I'm fine, don't... don't worry. I'm fine, I'm fine."

Frank was now sitting on the bed and he said, "Just because you repeat it doesn't make it true. Seriously, what's wrong? Please just tell me."

Gee shrugged and started fidgeting with something on their desk, "I don't know, it's stupid."

"I don't care how stupid it is, it obviously upset you- whatever it is- so I wanna know to try and help."

Gee sighed and looked at the ground, "I just- I don't know. What you said earlier, when we were grabbing the glitter to prank Ray with, kind of... shocked me? I wasn't expecting it and... I didn't know how to react, I guess."

"So you panicked?"

"I don't know. I- Yeah, I guess I panicked. Dumb, right?"

Frank got up and went over to Gee, standing only a few inches away from them. Gee was suddenly reminded of when the two had first met, when they were showing Frank their drawings and he had almost kissed them. So much had changed since then, so many things had happened that Gee never thought would. Frank smiled softly and said, "It's not dumb. But I _did_ mean what I said, Gee. I meant it all."

He then leaned up and kissed Gee softly, his arms wrapping around their neck. _This_ was the biggest difference between when the two had first met and now. Gee figured that this sort of thing wouldn't happen to them anytime soon, especially not with someone as attractive as Frank. When they first saw him, they thought _well, fuck. Here comes another crush that will lead to absolutely nothing good._  But it _did_ lead to something good, it did and Gee couldn't be happier. 

They still were fucking scared, though. 

Frank pulled away after a while and asked, "You okay? At least, for now?"

Gee nodded and smiled, "Yeah, I'm okay. Sorry for freaking out."

Frank kissed them again quickly, then said, "No need to apologize, I don't mind."

"Yeah okay."

Frank smiled at them, then moved away to the bed. He sat back down and then said, "Oh, I got you something!"

Gee joined him on the bed, "What sort of something?"

Frank grabbed his bag from the ground and started digging something out of it, saying, "Don't laugh, I wanted to do something nice and- I don't know. It seems kinda dumb, now that I think about it." He pulled something out, but Gee wasn't sure what it was. 

Gee laughed, "I'm sure it isn't dumb, just show me."

"Please don't laugh."

"Oh my god, I'm not gonna laugh!" Gee took the thing from Frank's hands and held it up. Their eyes went wide when they realized what it was: a dress.

"I just- When you were talking to me the other day about how you were scared I just saw you as a guy, I- I don't know. This is my dumb way of saying 'hey, I totally don't see you as a guy, Gee!' Sorry, it's- it's really stupid."

"It's not stupid." Gee said in a quiet voice. The dress was fucking _awesome_. It was red and had a black collar, tighter at the top but went out at the skirt. It was basically everything Gee ever wanted in a dress.

They actually had wanted a dress for a while now, but they were just too scared to buy one. Technically, they could just say it was for their girlfriend or sister or something, but they still were scared that someone would just _know_.

"Do you like it?" Frank asked hesitantly.

"I fucking _love_ it, holy shit." Gee grinned, then kissed Frank excitedly. They pulled away and started to giggle, making Frank grin too.

"Shit, I'm really glad you like it, Gee. I was like... scared you would hate it or something."

"Why would I hate it? _That's_  stupid. I love it!"

"Well, thank god for that. I mean, I kept the receipt and tag on just in case you hated it- or if it didn't fit you- so I was prepared to like... I don't know. Get you something else instead."

"Well, it still might not fit, but I still love it a lot. I'm gonna try it on." Gee got up and was about to take their shirt off, but hesitated. Frank hadn't seen them without clothes on yet, and Gee wasn't sure if they were ready for him to see quite yet. They figured it probably would happen eventually- well, maybe- but... not now. They didn't want to risk putting it on in the bathroom and their mom seeing, so they would just suck it up and do it now.

Thankfully, Frank seemed to notice Gee's hesitance, because he said, "I can turn around if you want."

Gee nodded, "Yeah, I want that."

Frank smiled at them, then turned around, now facing the wall. Gee quickly undressed, then put on the dress. It was a little tight on top, but not too bad. They looked in the mirror and their stomach flipped. They actually looked _feminine_. Probably not cis-passing, but goddammit they looked like a girl. Maybe not the prettiest girl, but still a girl. It felt fucking amazing, they wanted to cry. They didn't cry, though, instead they just went over to Frank and kissed him deeply, pushing him down so he was laying on his back.

Gee straddled him and whispered, "Thank you." into his ear.

Frank laughed softly and said, "Didn't realize you would react this way."

"Of course I would. You validated my identity and gave me a kickass dress at the same time. You should be happy I'm not crying."

"Yeah, please don't cry. I never know what to do when people cry in front of me."

Gee started giggling, "Don't worry, I won't cry. I might just kiss you some more."

"Now _that_ I'm totally fine with."

\----------

"I wanna wear it out." Gee said the next morning. It was a lovely Saturday morning and Gee and Frank were laying in bed together.

"Wear what out?"

"The dress you got me. I wanna- I wanna wear it in public."

"You sure?"

"Yeah... yeah I do. But I don't want it to be in a place where someone I know from church might see me- so that rules out the mall. Also nowhere where we have to spend a lot of money."

"Uhm... Walmart?"

"What would we do in Walmart?"

"I don't know... reorganize the music section?"

"That's a fucking dumb idea, Frank."

"But it really needs to be organized, Gee. We would be there for hours if we did that. _Hours_."

"We're not gonna do that. I don't want to spend hours in Walmart organizing the music section."

"Someone needs to do it."

"Get a job at Walmart and _then_ organize the music section."

"Ew, I don't want to work at Walmart."

Gee rolled their eyes, "Well stop complaining about how shitty they organize stuff, then."

"Fine, I will. I'm just saying Ariana Grande and Queen shouldn't be in the same section. It doesn't make sense! None of the letters are the same! It isn't even by genre! They just put them in randomly or something."

Gee started to laugh, "Wow, you're really passionate about this, aren't you?"

"I am, Gee. I am."

Gee sat up and poked Frank in the stomach, "We still haven't figured out where we should go."

We should just go to McDonald's or something."

"Yeah, okay, that works."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> btw how many people get the reference of the fic title? just curious. i mean... it's not like a super secret obscure reference or anything, i'm just wondering.
> 
> also there was _totally_ a brawl at the bingo place
> 
> p.s. hmu on tumblr at transboykobrakid for tons of gay content


	12. 1 Peter 4:10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "No, no, _no_! You need to flail your arms more, Gerard! _More_!" Jon yelled, making everyone else groan.
> 
> "I'm already flailing my arms as much as I can!"
> 
> "It's still not enough! You have to make it believable that you're a giant squid, Gerard. You have to go for _realism_!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly i dont have any excuses except that i'm adhd as fuck (i literally got distracted writing this sentence and looked up betta fish) so uh yeah weekly updates might not be possible tbh but... i will always update (and my beta will try to force me to update as soon as possible (love u babe))

Mikey was standing at the back of the youth room waiting for the lesson to start. Pete walked up to him and smiled. Things between them still weren't perfect, but as each week went by, they were getting more and more freedom. The leaders would keep a close eye on them, making sure they wouldn't sneak off together to do anything bad, but they still could actually interact without someone stopping them. It was getting better, but Mikey knew things would never be the same as they were before.

It was mostly because of their parents, really. The leaders didn't actually seem to care all that much, they just did what they did because Pete and Mikey's parents had asked them too. It fucking sucked, but at least they could hang out again. Well, they could never hang out alone- that was obvious- but they still could see each other and that's what mattered. 

Mikey just wanted things to be normal again. He fucking wished they had been more careful, wished they hadn't gotten _caught,_ especially since it happened in a dumb way. He hadn't even really wanted to come out to his parents while he still lived with them, but then all the shit with Pete happened and now he was screwed.

He didn't care that the stuff with Pete had happened, though. He was so, _so_ happy that he started dating Pete. It was the sort of thing he thought would only happen in his fantasies, but then it really happened and it was fucking amazing- even if the best of it didn't last long. But it's not like they stopped dating, they just had to be very, very careful. Even if they had broken up, they probably would never stop being friends. Ten years could go by and the two of them would still be joking around with each other just like normal.

Pete interrupted Mikey's train of thought by poking him repeatedly on the cheek, saying, "Dude, what are you thinking about?"

Mikey batted Pete's hand away and laughed, "Well _now_ I'm thinking about how annoying you are."

"Okay, well, I already _knew_ that. What were you thinking about before, though?"

"You know... Us, mostly."

"Us?" Pete asked, his curiosity piqued.

"Yeah, us. Like... I don't know. Just our relationship and shit."

"Do you like... do you not wanna be together anymore or something?" Pete looked crestfallen and Mikey panicked slightly.

"No! No, it's not that! I just... I don't know... I was just thinking about how this kinda sucks, you know? That we're barely able to hang out anymore. But I don't wanna break up with you or anything, 'cause I really like you and that'd be dumb. No, I just wish we were more careful before."

Pete let out a sigh of relief and said, "Oh, thank god. I was about to kill you for breaking up with me _in a church_. That'd be like, extra terrible for some reason. But, yeah, I wish we were more careful too. But, at least things _are_ getting better, right?"

Mikey smiled softly at Pete, "Yeah, I'm glad things are getting better. Like, they aren't yelling at us for talking to each other! It's great."

Pete laughed, "Yeah, but I'm pretty sure Dallon has been giving us looks for the past 5 minutes."

"Maybe we should sit down with like Gee and shit? So Dallon is less suspicious."

"Good idea. I also am going to tell Frank and Ray that you referred to them as 'and shit.'"

Mikey shoved Pete playfully and laughed, "Shut up! I just didn't feel like saying all of their names."

"It's not hard to say 'Gee, Ray, and Frank,' dude."

"Shh, it totally can be, stop judging me."

"I totally can judge you, dude."

The two of them made their way over to Gerard, Ray, and Frank, sitting down close to each other but not close enough for anyone to get suspicious. They still had to be careful, after all. Dallon walked to the front of the room, shuffling papers around in his hand. He cleared his throat and began to speak.

“So, couple of announcements before I start the teaching. As most of you probably know, summer is approaching quickly, which means we’re beginning to plan for V.B.S. As always, you all are encouraged to volunteer in whatever way you would like- whether it be helping to set up, or acting in the skit.”

“Hell yeah!” Gerard yelled and high fived Ray, making Dallon roll his eyes.

“Seems a few of you are excited about that part. Anyways! There are some sign up sheets in the back, so don’t forget to sign up if you would like to help out. Jon and William will be in charge of the skit-“

Jon interrupted Dallon with a cheer and Dallon rolled his eyes again.

“Apparently we have lots of fans of the skit here.” Dallon laughed.

“The skit is always the funnest party, Dallon.” Ray called out.

“You see, I’ve never done the skit, so I wouldn’t know.”

“You should, it’s great.” Gerard said.

“You know I always teach, Gerard.”

“But acting is fun.”

“Yeah, but- Okay, I don’t have time to argue. William and Jon are doing the skit, Breezy is doing snacks, and I’ll be doing the teaching. When you sign up, you can say a specific thing you want to do, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll end up doing it. Now, there isn’t actually a sheet for the skit, but you can’t just talk to Jon if you want to be in it. Sign up soon, though. We start preperations for V.B.S. later this month. Now, onto the teaching.”

—————

After the teaching, Jon approached Ray and Gerard and asked, “Hey, you guys are gonna be in the play, right?”

“Uhm, obviously we are. We always are.” Gerard replied.

Jon grinned, “That’s what I thought, I was just double checking.” He turned to Mikey, Pete and Frank and added, “What about you three? You guys gonna do it?”

“I don’t kno-“ Frank started, but Ray cut him off, saying, “Frank’s gonna do it, too.”

“I don’t even know if I ca-“

“He’s doing it.”

Jon clapped his hands together, “Great! You’re gonna love it, Frank.”

“We’ll also do it.” Pete said, gesturing at himself and Mikey.

“Awesome! Now, we just need one more person.”

Hayley walked over then and asked, “You guys talking about the V.B.S. skit?”

“Yes, we are!” Jon responded.

“Cool! I was wondering if I could be in it? I always mean to do it, but then other things get in the way, so I can’t.”

“Of course you can be in it! We need at least one girl to be in it, anyway.”

“Great! Oh, but when will practices be? Is there any specific day we’re gonna practice each week?”

“There isn’t a specific day we will practice each week, yet. We will figure that out on our first drama meeting, which will be next Tuesday.”

Frank turned to Gerard and said, “Uhm, I don’t know if my parents would be able to give me a ride then. Could you pick me up?”

“Yeah, of course! You don’t live too out of the way, it won’t be a problem.” Gerard replied.

“Okay, cool. You might have to give me a ride to most of the practices, though.”

Gerard shrugged, “Again, not a problem.”

—————

Tuesday came quickly and the three of them- Mikey, Gerard, and Frank- were headed to church for the drama meeting. Mikey was excited, he always had loved volunteering for V.B.S.- plus, this would make it so he would see Pete a lot more often. Yes, it still would be under the watchful eye of youth leaders, but Jon and William didn’t seem to care as much as Dallon and Breezy. Obviously they still couldn’t be too open, but they also didn’t have to be as careful. But, in the end, all Mikey really cared about was that he actually was able to see Pete more.

They got to church at the same time as Ray. Gerard got out of the car and ran over to Ray, leaving Frank and Mikey alone. Mikey leaned against the car and looked at Frank, then asked, “So, how are things with you and Gee?”

Frank shrugged and looked over to where Ray and Gerard were talking, then replied, “Pretty good, I guess. Nothing much has changed.”

“You guys are being careful, right?”

Frank laughed and glanced at Mikey, then back at Gerard, “Yeah, we’re being careful. We don’t wanna get caught, after all.”

“Yeah, getting caught sucks.”

“How are things with you and Pete?”

Now Mikey was the one to shrug, “As good as things can be. So, you know, not the best. But, we’re trying, and that’s what matters, right?”

“Yeah, that’s what matters. You guys able to hang out at all outside of church?”

Mikey snorted, “You really think our parents trust us that much?”

“Nah, I was just wondering. At least you can see him, though- even if it is only once or twice a week.”

“Plus, now that we’re doing this, we’re gonna see each other a lot more. Jon makes us practice a lot.”

“How much is a lot? Like… how many times a week?”

“I don’t know, once or twice a week usually. Practices don’t last that long, though. They get longer the closer it gets to V.B.S. week, switching from one hour to like… two hours. Jon gets really into it.”

Frank laughed, “Well, that isn’t too bad. I don’t even know what V.B.S. is, let alone why I’m helping out with it.”

Mikey looked at Frank and raised his eyebrows, “You don’t know what V.B.S. is?”

“No, of course I don’t. I’ve only been going to church for like…” Frank stopped and started counting off in his head, “Shit, I’ve been coming for a while now. But I still don’t know what V.B.S. is.”

“Okay, well like, it stands for Vacation Bible School, and basically it’s just a week where kids come and do a of bunch shit. Shit like crafts, games, learning about Jesus and stuff.”

“Oh, okay, that makes sense. So like… is the skit all biblical and shit?”

“Nah, not really. Well, it teaches 'important Bible lessons,' but we aren’t like acting out Bible stories or anything.”

“Alright, cool. Is it really as fun as Ray and Gee make it out to be?”

Mikey grinned, “Oh hell yeah. It’s really fun, especially doing the skit. Volunteering for other stuff is fun, too, but I’m not expecting you to do anything else.”

Ray and Gerard started walking inside, so Frank and Mikey followed. Frank put his hands in his pockets and asked, “What sort of stuff is there to volunteer for?”

“Well, like, leading the groups, working in arts and crafts, doing the games, stuff like that. Ray and Gerard always like doing the games together, so they’re probably gonna do that again this year. I like leading the groups, specifically the youngest group. They’re really adorable. Plus, it’s not actually like I’m leading it because I basically just walk them from room to room and make sure no one gets lost.”

“Sounds fun.” Frank laughed.

“It is! Honestly!” Mikey shoved Frank lightly and he just laughed more.

“Walking kids around the church definitely sounds like what I wanna do during my summer.”

“Well if you put it like that it sounds really boring, but really it’s super fun.”

“I’m sure it is.”

The two caught up with Ray and Gerard, hearing that they were talking about what to do for games this year. They were talking about different water games they could do, when they walked into the youth room and were interuptted by Jon saying, “Ah, you guys are here!”

William and Jon were sitting on the ground stapling scripts together and Ray asked, “So, what’s this year's skit about?”

Jon grinned widely and replied, “Pirates!”

Ray sat beside William and high five Jon, “Awesome! How many parts are there?”

“There’s only five parts, so we’re gonna have to write a sixth character in. Unless, of course, someone is willing to just be tech?”

Gerard sat next to Ray and said, “I could be tech.”

“Really? You sure?”

“Yeah, why not? I mean, tech basically just means I get to spray water on the kids, right?”

William laughed, “Yeah, basically. Also, confetti.”

“Oh man, confetti? I’m totally in! Put me down as ‘tech.’” Gerard said with a grin.

“Gee, you are way too excited about confetti.” Frank chuckled.

“It’s confetti, Frank, of course I’m excited.”

William started flipping through one of the scripts, then looked up and asked, “Wait, where’s Pete and Hayley?”

“Probably not here ye-“

“Nope, I’m here.” Hayley said, interrupting Mikey, “I mean, I just got here, but still. I’m here now.”

“So, Pete is the only one left?” William asked, looking back down at the script in his hand.

“Yeah, but he always comes late to this sort if thing.” Mikey responded.

“Hey, that isn’t true! I’m totally here on time tonight.” Pete walked into the room and grinned at Mikey, “Were you starting to worry?”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “No, it’s just true. You do always come late to things, Pete.”

“Okay, maybe. But, not tonight! I mean, that mostly was because my mom said that I ‘can’t be late too the first practice, Pete’ and that I ‘need to get out of the shower already because it’s rude to be late.’”

“Well, your mom is right about that, dude."

Pete put his finger on Mikey's lips and said, "Shh... just be grateful that I'm here."

Mikey batted his hand away and said, "Get your filthy finger away from my mouth."

"I literally just said that I was showering for a long time."

"Yeah, _exactly_. I know what you do in the shower, dude- especially if you're in for a long time."

Pete winked suggestively, "You got me there."

"Okay," Jon said, "Now that everyone is here, we can start assigning roles to people. Gerard already volunteered to do tech, so he doesn't really have to come to most of the practices, since he doesn't have any lines."

Gerard laughed, "Implying I'm not going to all of the practices."

"Yeah, he kinda has to come, since he's my ride." Frank added.

"Oh, that too. I just kinda like coming to practices, to be honest. Nothing better to do, ya know?"

"Yeah, I know." Frank giggled, "You're my favorite loser homeschooler."

"Hey, I'm literally _right here_." Mikey waved his hand in front of Frank's face and Frank shoved him away lightly.

"Sorry, Mikey, but Gee is my favorite."

"Wow, I'm offended. I can't believe this betrayal, Frank."

Pete leaned his head on Mikey's shoulder, "It's okay, you're _my_ favorite."

 "Thank you, Pete."

"Okay, okay, enough of this." William got up and started handing the scripts out to everyone, "You all can read through this and then fight over which characters you want to be."

Pete raised his hand and William said, "Yes, Pete?"

"Will this be a fight to the death?"

"No, because then we'd need to get more actors."

"Damn, that's a bummer. Well, guess I'll be going now! See you, guys!" Pete stood up and made as if he was about to leave, but Mikey grabbed his hand and said, "Oh, sit down."

"I was promised murder, Mikey! This is a huge disappointment."

"This is a skit for _children_ , Pete."

"Who says children can't appreciate murder?"

"There's not going to be any murder in this skit!" Jon said suddenly, then added, "We don't have the budget to get fake blood."

"I actually know how to make fake blood." Frank said.

"Really? Is it cheap?" Jon asked excitedly.

William rolled his eyes, "Jon... murder doesn't even fit into the script."

"I could write it in."

"You're not writing a _murder_ into a V.B.S. skit!"

"Listen, I'm just saying we shouldn't rule out our options."

"That shouldn't even be an option!"

"Can I be the captain?" Ray asked, interrupting Jon and William.

Jon looked around the circle, "Is everyone okay with that?"

Pete nodded, then grinned, "Yeah, I just wanna be the weird cook dude."

Mikey laughed, looking through the script, "Oh man, that part is perfect for you."

"I know right? I'd be amazing at it."

"So, no one cares if Ray plays the captain and Pete plays the cook?"

"Nah, I'm fine with that. I wanna be the stowaway." Mikey replied.

"Why is the only girl character a huge clutz?" Hayley asked, sounding annoyed.

Jon shrugged, "I don't know, I didn't write it. If you want we can switch the gender of her with the first mate?"

"Oh, hell yeah! I wanna be the first mate!" Hayley pumped her fists excitedly and Frank laughed.

"I take it that means I'm the clutz?" He asked.

"Uh... yeah. Is that fine with you?" 

"Yep, I'm cool with that. It'll be fun."

\----------

"No, no, _no_! You need to flail your arms more, Gerard! _More_!" Jon yelled, making everyone else groan.

"I'm already flailing my arms as much as I can!"

"It's still not enough! You have to make it believable that you're a giant squid, Gerard. You have to go for _realism_!"

"He's literally playing a giant squid, it doesn't have to be realistic." Frank pointed out.

Jon threw his hands up in annoyance, "Whatever, lets just takes a break. Bill, order pizza."

"Already on it." William replied, taking out his phone and walking to a quieter part of the room. 

Pete walked over to Mikey and leaned his head on Mikey's shoulder, "I'm tired."

Mikey put his hand on Pete's lower back and said, "You're always tired."

"Yeah, but I'm like... extra tired now."

"Quickly take a nap while Jon isn't looking."

"How am I supposed to do that, babe?"

Mikey leaned his head on Pete's head, "I'll distract him."

"Nah, I think I'll just stay here with you."

"That works too."

Hayley walked over to them and ran her hand through her hair, "So, uh, I take it you guys are still dating?"

Mikey blushed and replied with, "What makes you think that?"

"You guys are like cuddling right now."

Pete giggled, "You got me there."

Hayley laughed and rolled her eyes, "Yeah, we all kinda figured you wouldn't stop dating because of what Tyler did. Especially since you guys have been friends since... well, forever."

"Yup, Tyler will have to try a lot harder if he wants us to break up."

"Yeah, like... a _lot_ harder." Pete grinned and kissed Mikey on the cheek, making him blush more.

"Pete, not at church." Mikey mumbled.

"Sorry, I wasn't thinking."

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." Hayley laughed.

"Thanks, you're a real pal." Pete held up his hand and Hayley high fived him.

"Yeah, of course. Just- you _might_ wanna tone it down a little. You don't want to get in any more trouble, right?"

"Yeah, we will. I mean, it's not like we're gonna start making out or anything." Mikey laughed.

"Although I really _want_ to make out with you."

"Aw, me too!"

Hayley laughed and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "You guys are kind of adorable. But, uhm... I was wondering... uh, about Frank and Gerard?"

"What about Frank and Gerard?" Mikey asked innocently.

"Are they... you know...."

"Are they what?" Mikey had to hold back a laugh this time. He knew exactly what Hayley was trying to ask, but he didn't really feel it was his place to talk about it. Plus, he wanted to see if she would come out and ask if Frank and Gerard were in a big gay relationship. 

" _Dating_! Are they dating?" Hayley whispered "dating" like she was cursing in front of her parents and Mikey couldn't hold back a laugh.

Hayley rolled her eyes and Mikey laughed more, then replied with, "It's not really my place to tell. I mean... what do you think is happening between them?"

"I think they're dating. Not sure how long, though."

"Didn't they get together at winter cam-"

Mikey hit Pete's leg and said, "Dude, I wasn't gonna confirm anything."

"Oh shit- uh, whoops?"

"Hah! I knew it! Debby totally owes me 10 dollars."

"You.... _bet_ on Gee's love life?"

Hayley shrugged, "Yeah? I mean, we all basically guessed that they were a thing since... Not sure, actually. Like, December? Anyway, it's kind of a surprise that it took them until February to get together."

"That's just 'cause Gerard is dumb." Pete said solemnly. 

Mikey giggled and elbowed Pete softly, "You're dumb too, asshole."

"Yes, but I'm dumb in a different way."

"Hey guys, the pizza is probably almost done. One of you should go next door and check." William said. 

"I'll go. Frank, you wanna come with me?" Gerard asked.

"Uh, yeah sure." Frank got up and walked with Gerard towards the door.

Mikey got up, though, and quickly walked over to them, saying, "Wait, I wanna come too."

Gerard turned to him and grinned, "Awesome! Come on, let's go."

The three of them walked out of the church and to the pizza place that was next door. Frank was holding Gerard's hand and Mikey smiled to himself. They really were cute together, and Mikey liked seeing Gerard happy like this. It was obvious from the start how the two felt about each other and Mikey was glad that Frank actually _did_ something about it- instead of just seeing Gerard lust after Frank for forever.

"Oh, I've been wondering since I first started going here," Frank stopped and pointed at a suspicious hole in the window, "Is that a bullet hole?"

Mikey said "Yes" at the same time Gerard said "No," making Frank look between the two and raise his eyebrows suspiciously. Gerard rolled his eyes at Mikey and said, "It's not a bullet hole."

"It sure as hell looks like a bullet hole."

"I agree with Mikey, it looks a lot like a bullet hole."

"But, I mean, it's totally not a bullet hole."

"How do you know? You weren't exactly here when it got there, Gee." Mikey laughed.

"Yeah, well neither were _you_."

"Well, if it's _not_ a bullet hole, then what is it?"

"I don't know, but who would shoot up a church?"

"It could've gotten here before this was a church, y'know." Mikey pointed out.

"It's still probably not a bullet hole."

"No offense, babe, but it's a bullet hole." Frank said, patting Gerard on the shoulder.

"I can't believe you're betraying me like this, Frank." Gerard said in an overdramatic offended tone of voice.

They continued walking and entered the pizza place. Frank laughed quietly and said, "I still can't believe there's a pizza place like... _right next door_  to the church."

"Isn't it great?" Gee giggled, then added, "We come here all the time."

"I don't blame you."

They approached the counter and the worker grinned, then said, "Gerard, Mikey- long time no see! Bill ordered a pizza earlier, yeah? You've come to pick it up?"

Gerard grinned back, "Yup! It's V.B.S. time of year again."

She laughed and leaned her elbows on the counter, "I swear the summer is the best time of year for us because of you kids. Not that I'm complaining, s'not like y'all are causing trouble. I just didn't realize being next to a church would bring so much business."

"What can I say? We're just a bunch of hungry teenagers, to be honest."

Frank leaned in closer to Mikey and whispered, "Are you guys like... friends with her?"

"Kinda... We just come here so often that it'd be weird if we didn't start talking to her at this point." Mikey replied, still whispering. 

"Oh, that makes sense."

Mikey tuned back into Gerard's conversations to hear Louise- the worker- say, "Well, the pizza is almost done, so you won't have to wait here for too long. Maybe a few more minutes and you'll be on your way."

"Awesome! We have time." Gerard turned back to Frank and Mikey and added, "Did you guys hear any of that?"

"Yep. Well... the important stuff." Frank replied.

"By important stuff he means when the pizza finishes." Mikey added with a laugh.

"Listen... I know what I want in life."

"And that's pizza?" Gerard giggled.

"Yes, exactly."

A few more minutes passed before Louise was handing them the pizza and they were heading back to the church. Mikey held the pizza, letting Frank and Gerard hold hands again while they walked back. Mikey always thought that if Gerard got a boyfriend/girlfriend he wouldn't be the sort to be very open about it, but Frank seemed to make him a lot more comfortable overall- pushing his limits in a healthy way. They really were a cute couple.

But Mikey couldn't help feeling a little jealous, since they had what he so desperately wished he could still have with Pete. He felt kind of like an asshole, he really was happy for Gerard, it was just... Frustrating. It's not like he would be too open with Pete anyway, but he just wished he could do _more_. He fucking missed kissing Pete.

They got back to the youth room and Mikey set the pizza down on one of the chairs. Pete ran up to him and said, "Mikey, my savior, my love, my everything, my-"

"I get it, you're happy about the pizza."

"Hey, I wasn't finished complimenting you!" Pete grinned.

Mikey rolled his eyes and shoved Pete lightly, "You're a dork."

Pete moved to open the pizza box, when Jon walked into the room and said, "Uh, so... I have to go? Something just came up and I have to leave like... right now. And since I'm the only one with a key..."

"...We have to leave?" Hayley finished.

"Yeah, basically. Sorry for cutting this practise short, guys. I don't _want_ to, I just really have to leave. We can try to have a longer practise next week to make up for the lost time, though."

William shrugged, "No need to apologize, we understand."

"Uhm... what about the pizza?" Pete asked disappointedly. 

"I'm not gonna make you throw it out or something, so don't worry, Pete. You can bring it home, if you want."

"There's no way in hell Pete's getting that whole pizza." Frank said as he looked at Pete suspiciously, as if he was about to make a run for it while holding the pizza.

"You guys could come over to my place? Like, all of you." Ray suggested.

Gerard groaned, "Yeah, but that means I have to _drive to your house_."

"Don't be such a baby, Gerard. It isn't that bad."

"It's like a 5 hour drive!"

Ray rolled his eyes, "It's only like an hour, chill."

"It's an hour through like a gigantic forest, though. Driving to your house is a nightmare."

"Whatever, I'm bringing the pizza home with me and you can follow me if you want to." Ray walked over and grabbed the pizza box and held it above his head as an attempt to make sure no one else grabbed it from him, "Anyone need a ride to my house? If you wanna come, of course."

Hayley slowly raised her hand and replied, "Uh, I do? I'm like really hungry and that pizza smells amazing, so... you know, not gonna pass up this opportunity."

"I'll come, too." William said, "I mean, I don't have anything else planned."

"Okay, so! The cool kids are me, Hayley, and Bill. Everyone else is a huge loser."

"Hey, I'm offended! I'm coming too, duh." Pete said in a mock offended tone.

"You want me to drive you, too?" Ray asked.

"No, Gee will drive him, since Gee's gonna suck it up and drive to Ray's house. Isn't that right, Gee?" Mikey was staring pointedly at Gerard and he rolled his eyes at Mikey.

"Fine, I'll drive you. But I won't like it."

Mikey grinned, "Awesome! Wait, Frank, you coming?"

Frank shrugged, "Might as well, considering everyone else is too."

"Hey, since you all are going, you should try and practise your lines and blocking, Frank." Jon said, standing in the doorway and giving Frank a look.

Frank held up his hands defensively, "I apologize for not being into acting."

"You should apologize for that. But really, I should be going. Goodnight, guys." Jon left the room then, leaving everyone else standing awkwardly.

Pete eventually clapped his hands together and said, "Let's go drive to Ray's house!"

\----------

"Jesus, you weren't kidding about his house being like 5 hours away." Frank commented as they drove through what seemed like an endless forest. Mikey and Pete were sitting in the back seat, Pete leaning his head on Mikey's shoulder while Mikey had his arm wrapped around him. It was cozy and he was mostly able to block out Gerard's grumblings about driving to Ray's house.

"You know, I've come here so many times and yet I still get lost. It's like, all winding roads and dead ends and shit. I swear he lives on the set of a horror movie or something."

"Man, are you sure this is the right way? It seems like there's no way someone could survive out here."

Mikey was distracted from Frank and Gerard's conversation again when Pete nuzzled closer to him. They practically were sitting on top of each other, but god it felt so nice. He missed this sort of physical contact with Pete, his body practically ached for it. Even when they weren't dating they were very handsy with each other, but being caught just made all of that go away. But now, in the privacy of this car, they could be as handsy as they wanted to be. It's not like Frank or Gerard would really mind.

Mikey ran his hand through Pete's hair and whispered, "I've missed you."

Pete kissed Mikey softly, then whispered back, "I've missed you too."

Mikey smiled and leaned his forehead on Pete's, then held Pete closer to him, almost as if he did let go he would never have this again. Which, sadly, isn't too far off from the truth. Times like this didn't come often anymore, so Mikey had to savor them while he could. Store up the memory and lock it up away from all the pain and hurt of the outside world. It was like he had a corner of his mind dedicated to good times with Pete, a corner he couldn't let be tainted by doubting thoughts and homophobic parents. He clung to a hope that maybe one day it'd get better, but for now he just savored this. Savored the feeling of Pete's breath on his neck, of his arms around Pete's waist, of Pete whispering "I love you" into his ear.

"Are you guys being gay in the backseat?" Gerard asked with a laugh.

"Fuck off, dick."

"No cum on the seats."

"Ew, do you really think I'd do that while you were in the car?" Mikey scrunched his nose up in disgust, "I'm not the one who's into doing it in public, Gee."

Mikey noticed Frank quirk an eyebrow up in interest at that, but he didn't want to think about what that could lead to. Right now he just wanted to think about Pete, which wasn't actually too hard to accomplish. Pete was trailing soft kisses along Mikey's jaw and it was very distracting. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back slightly, letting Pete start moving those kisses down his neck. At this moment he was incredibly thankful that Ray lived far away- it meant more time he could spend with Pete.

Mikey was also thankful that Gerard and Frank wouldn't get weird about what they were doing. It's not like they were gonna do anything too bad, but still, someone could easily get weirded out. Of course, the two of them understood Mikey and Pete's situation and knew that this was basically the only possible time they could interact like this.

They finally arrived at Ray's house and Gerard practically fell out of the car, happy to not be stuck inside of it any longer. Frank got out and looked at Ray's house with suspicion.

"Why does it look like someone took a house from a cookie cutter neighborhood and dropped it in the middle of the woods?"

Gerard walked over to Frank and put his hand on Frank's shoulder, "There are lots of theories, actually. The most likely one is that they were planning on building a neighborhood here, but someone- or some _thing_ \- ended up killing the workers. My guess is the trees that they would've had to cut down decided to defend themselves and killed everyone before they could finish building the neighborhood."

"So... You refuse to believe that there's a bullet hole in the window at church, but you think a bunch of trees killed people in defense?"

Gerard shrugged, "It makes a lot of sense, dude."

The door of the house opened and Ray walked out, waving to them. He called out, "Hey, you guys are finally here! Stop loitering around and come inside."

"We're not loitering, I was just telling Frank about your trees." Gerard called back.

"You mean how they killed a bunch of people?"

"Yeah, exactly."

Ray laughed and rolled his eyes, "Well, whatever. Just come inside already."

The four of them walked inside and followed Ray into the living room. Everyone was already there, and Mikey wondered if Gerard got lost on the way there. It wouldn't be surprising if he had.

"Are your parents here?" Frank asked.

"Nah, they're out getting milk. Probably won't be back for a couple hours. But anyway..." Ray sat on the couch and patted the seat next to him, looking at Gerard, "Come sit with me."

Gerard went to sit next to Ray and said, "I think Frank is afraid of your house."

"That's a normal reaction." Ray turned towards Frank, "Do not be afraid of the trees, they only kill those who do them harm."

"Shit, does that mean I can't start a forest fire? Well, there goes my plans!" 

Gerard gestured for Frank to come to him, then he pulled Frank onto his lap. Frank started laughing and Gerard wrapped his arms around Frank's waist, saying, "You nerd! Don't burn trees! They're harmless."

"If what you and Ray say is true, the trees aren't exactly harmless."

Gerard put a finger in front of his mouth and shushed him, making Frank laugh more. Mikey looked at William to see how he was reacting, but he didn't seem to be paying attention- too busy talking to Hayley about something that Mikey couldn't hear.

Pete grabbed Mikey's hand and pulled him onto the floor by the couch that Gerard, Ray, and Frank were on. Mikey was hesitant to sit this close to Pete, at first, but soon realized that no one in the room cared. He laid down and rested his head on Pete's lap, focusing on nothing but the feeling of Pete stroking his hair. Mikey readjusted so he was looking up at Pete and smiled. He knew it was fucking cheesey, but he could always get lost in Pete's eyes.

He had thought a lot of cheesey things like that ever since he started dating Pete.

Pete was smiling down at Mikey now- still stroking his hair. Mikey reached up and ran his fingers through Pete's hair, then rested his hand on the back of Pete's neck.

Mikey was about to just kiss Pete right there when Ray coughed loudly and said, "Wow, get a room you two."

Mikey blushed crimson and pulled his hand away from Pete. Pete turned his head so he was looking at Ray and said, "Maybe we will get a room."

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes, "We're not gonna get a room."

Pete looked back at Mikey and wiggled his eyebrows, "You sure about that?"

"Where are we gonna get a room?"

"Let's steal Ray's room."

"Uh, no you will not steal Ray's room!" Ray said and kicked the back of Pete's head.

Pete laughed, "Oh, now we definitely are!"

Pete got up, then took Mikey's hand and pulled him up after him. He dragged Mikey out of the living room and up to Ray's room, both laughing as Ray yelled stuff after them. Mikey shut the door and turned around to see Pete rummaging in Ray's desk.

"What are you doing?" Mikey asked as he walked over to Pete.

"I'm looking for a sharpie." Pete replied, then added, "I wanna write something new on Ray's wall."

"Ohh okay." Mikey grinned and started helping Pete look for a sharpie. It was a thing they always did- well, a thing everyone always did- when they went to Ray's house. His wall was covered in people's names or little messages or drawings or really anything that people wanted to put on it. Gerard had even drawn something on his ceiling- which had, apparently, given Ray nightmares at one point. It was a fun thing to do, and Mikey wished that he would be allowed to do the same in his room.

Pete finally found a sharpie and grinned at Mikey, then started writing his name on the wall.

"Are you seriously just writing your name?" Mikey asked, his eyebrows raised in a questioning manner.

"No, shush, I'm not done."

Mikey watched Pete write and laughed when he finished. He had written "pete + mikey (on your bed)" and drew a heart around it. Mikey took the sharpie from him and drew more smaller hearts around the bigger one, then put the sharpie back on Ray's desk. He turned back to Pete and asked, "You think he'll notice it?"

"He always notices when people write something new on his wall. It's like a sixth sense."

"He should get Frank to write something, since this is his first time over."

"Oh, you're right! He totally should."

"I can go get him-" Mikey turned to go to the door, but Pete stopped him by grabbing his hand.

Mikey looked at Pete questioningly and Pete moved closer to him.

"You know, there is a reason why I wanted you alone, Mikey." Pete said and draped his arms over Mikey's shoulders.

Mikey wrapped his arms around Pete's waist, pulling him closer, saying, "Is that right?"

"Mhm..." Pete leaned up and kissed Mikey. Mikey's eyes fluttered shut and he kissed Pete back deeply. 

They stayed in the same spot for a little bit, but then Mikey started moving them towards Ray's bed. He pushed Pete down on it and he laughed, grinning up at Mikey. Mikey straddled him and rested his hands on his chest, then leaned down and kissed him. Pete was running his hands up and down Mikey's back while Mikey tangled his fingers in Pete's hair. They were kissing slowly, gently, just savoring each other's presence. They wouldn't do anything too bad, obviously, considering they were in Ray's bed- and because a bunch of people were only downstairs. Obviously no one cared that they were doing this, since no one tried to stop them when they left together, but they still wouldn't do anything too bad.

After a little while, Mikey pulled away slightly and muttered, "We probably should go back downstairs."

"Mm, just a few more minutes, please? We never get to do this." Pete replied.

Mikey chuckled softly, "Okay, babe."

They continued kissing for a little bit longer, before Mikey pulled away again and said, "Okay, we really should go now."

Pete rolled his eyes, "Okay, fiiine. But only because you are probably right."

Mikey grinned, "Of course I'm right! I'm always right."

"Yeah, yeah. 'Course you are. Anyway, come on, let's go." Pete shoved Mikey off of him, making Mikey start laughing as Pete climbed over him. Mikey got up after him and wrapped his arms around his waist from the behind. Pete giggled and continued walking with Mikey holding onto him. 

They got downstairs like that, both of them giggling like idiots. Ray looked at them suspiciously when they walked into the living room.

"What were you two doing?" He asked as they both sat back down on the ground.

"You know... things." Pete replied with a smirk.

"You guys are disgusting."

"Hey, now you know how I feel!" Gerard laughed.

Mikey rolled his eyes, "We were just making out."

"Never mind, you don't know how I feel." Gerard turned to Pete, "You still need to buy me a new bed."

"Uhm, not gonna happen, dude. Can you settle for new sheets?" 

Gerard crossed his arms in annoyance, but said, "Yeah, fine. Buy me new sheets."

Mikey noticed Frank looking at William weirdly, but his question as to what Frank was thinking was soon answered when Frank asked, "So... William.... what's your opinion on the whole," he waved his hand around the room aimlessly, then continued, "Gay thing."

William sighed and ran a hand through his hair, then shrugged and replied, "I mean, I know it's technically a sin? But I like... don't understand why it's a sin. It just seems harmless to me, so I don't get why God would consider it wrong."

"I bet you really don't get it whenever you're in the same room as Gabe." Pete said, wiggling his eyes suggestively at William.

"I swear to God... Pete, how many times do I have to tell you that Gabe and I are just friends?"

"Yes, you might be friends, but that doesn't mean you want to be only friends with him."

"Okay, this is the second time Pete has brought up Gabe. Who is he and why does Pete keep implying that he and you have a thing?" Frank asked, looking at them both with confusion.

"Gabe is Bill's secret gay lover."

"Pete!" William exclaimed and threw a pillow at Pete.

"What? It's true!"

"No it isn't! He's just a volunteer at summer camp, Frank. Just ignore Pete."

"No, don't ignore me! He's feeding you _lies_."

"Dammit, where's another pillow..." William muttered, looking around his chair for another pillow to throw at Pete. Hayley laughed and handed him a pillow she was holding. He thanked her quickly before throwing the pillow at Pete again. Pete was just grinning at him the whole time, not caring that a pillow just hit him in the face.

"So, uh... I know you guys probably don't wanna think about this, but we really should work on our lines. You know how Jon gets when we don't constantly work on our lines." Gerard said, interrupting the possible pillow fight that was about to break out between Pete and William.

"You don't even have lines, Gerard." Mikey said and slapped Gerard's foot.

"He is right, though. We probably should work on our lines. Remember last year? Pete didn't know any of his lines and Jon went to the hospital because his vocal chords got destroyed." Hayley laughed.

"Did anyone bring the script, though?" Frank asked.

"Oh, hon..." Gerard patted Frank on his shoulder, then pulled out a script from seemingly nowhere and handed it to Frank. Frank looked around the room in confusion and Pete gave him a sympathetic look.

"You need to keep your script with you at all times, Frank." Hayley said.

"And you need to make sure Jon never finds out that you went without it, he would _flip_." Mikey laughed.

"I feel like I've joined a cult or something."

"Nah, this has been a pretty normal year, so far." Ray said.

"Okay, so now I'm terrified."

"You get used to it." Gerard grinned and patted him on the head.

"That's what I'm scared of."

"So, we gonna do this?" William asked.

"Fuck yeah." Ray laughed, then put on a over-dramatic serious face. "Let's roll."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey so i just wanted to give summerofpetekey a quick birthday shout out! we haven't talked much but you seem really cool and I hope your bday is rad!!
> 
> also reminder that i'm on tumblr at transboykobrakid so follow me if ya want to


	13. Leviticus 15:16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At least now Mikey wouldn't be the only one who had done something sexual because that's totally not fair goddammit. They were older than him like what the fuck. Absolutely ridiculous.

Gee felt like shit. There was no reason for them to feel like shit, they just did. But at this point they were used to feeling like shit- it was just a normal part of them.

Doesn't mean they had to enjoy it, though.

They basically had spent the entire week lying in bed, trying to not think about nothing and no one. They even had barely talked to Frank, just not being in the mood. He probably was getting worried, though, if the amount of texts they had received from him said anything. But they just couldn't bring themselves to text him back. Which, regretfully, just made them feel worse. It was like a never ending cycle of feeling like shit and Gee was tired of it. But, of course, they also didn't have enough energy to try to make themselves feel better, so they were stuck moping around in bed all day.

Mikey seemed like he wanted to help them, but also like he knew there was nothing he could do to help. Gee kept hearing him approach their door and then walk away, as if he knew it would be better to just leave them alone. They didn't know if his company would help or not- probably not. They just wanted to be alone.

Which, of course, meant that church on Wednesday would be hell. They usually would be able to get out of it, but for some reason their parents had been more strict about them going to church on both Sunday and Wednesday. 

They would just have to suck it up- put a smile on their face and pretend everything was fine. Of course, when they got home they would probably pass out from the effort, but they could deal. They just hoped Frank wouldn't try to ask them to talk about what's wrong, because they had no explanation. This was just the way they were, and Frank would have to get used to that if he actually wanted to stay with them.

But, now that Gee actually had to get dressed, they were faced with another problem: motherfucking _dysphoria_. They looked in the mirror and immediately regretted the decision to do that, feeling almost sick to their stomach at what they saw. It wasn't any specific part of them that felt wrong, it was just everything. They couldn't just look in the fucking mirror without wanting to cry. 

They just wanted to feel numb, not have to think or feel anything. If only they could control numbness, have a little button that could turn their feelings on and off. That would help a lot, but sadly it doesn't work like that, so they would have to suffer in silence. They only ever seemed to be numb when they wanted to feel something.

Basically, this was just not the time for them to be forced to go to church. They almost wanted to fake sick, but that might just get them in trouble. 

They ended up putting on their most feminine outfit they could without actually wearing the dress Frank got them. Things would be so much easier if society wasn't such a dick to trans people. They could actually get away with wearing a dress without being scared of what might happen. Nothing terrible had really happened to them, but that doesn't mean something terrible would never happen. Not to mention the fact that they were in a religious setting- which meant that yes, there might be some good eggs, but overall they just didn't really accept trans people. Which was fucked up considering there was nothing against being trans in the bible.

They got dressed as quickly as possible, trying not to focus on themselves for too long. They kept their head down as they walked out to the car, not making eye contact with anyone- including Mikey. They could feel Mikey looking at them during the car ride, but they didn't want to look. They knew he'd try to say something if they looked at him.

Frank approached Gee the moment he saw them, concern written all over his face. They knew this was coming, they had been avoiding contact with him for almost a week. Maybe they could just lie and say their phone broke.

"Hey, Gee, how've you been? You okay?" Frank asked once he got over to Gee.

Gee forced a smile onto their face and replied, "Yeah, I've been okay."

"Why haven't you said anything to me? Did I do something wrong?" Frank looked upset and Gee started to feel guilty for not replying to him. They probably should have, but they just couldn't find the effort to.

"No, you didn't do anything wrong. Sorry, i've just been... I don't know. It's nothing, don't worry."

"No, wait, are you okay?" Frank put his hand on their arm and suddenly Gee wanted to just be with him- not have to sit through a service that would just end up making him feel worse.

"Yeah, I, uh- You wanna just ditch the teaching? We can sit in the back room with the couches and showers- no one ever goes in there."

"Yeah, okay, we can do that. But really, are you okay?"

Gee shrugged, "Not really. But, uhm, it's kinda weird and yeah doesn't make much sense. I've just felt really drained and shitty all week, but I still should've texted you back. Sorry 'bout that."

"It's okay, I'm just glad that I didn't fuck anything up already." Frank laughed slightly and rubbed the back of his neck. 

"Honestly, I'm more afraid that _I'll_ fuck things up." Gee said with a laugh as they started walking towards the back room.

"Nah, I'm pretty sure I'd fuck things up before you."

"Have you seen me? I'm like... the poster child of fuck up's." 

"Yeah, but you're cute."

Gee rolled their eyes, "That doesn't change anything."

"Okay, well, whatever. I still doubt you could fuck things up with me. I like you a lot. Like, a _lot_."

Gee blushed and shoved him lightly, "Well, I like you a lot too."

Frank grinned at them, "I bet I like you more."

"I highly doubt that."

"It's true!"

"I can't believe I'm dating a filthy liar."

"Not a liar, although I am pretty filthy."

"Same." Gee winked at him, then added, "And by that I mean I haven't showered in almost a month."

"I'm so turned on right now."

"You should be, I'm fucking hot."

"That's absolutely true." Frank wrapped his arm around Gee's waist, pulling them close. They got to the back room and Frank pulled Gee down onto one of the couches. Gee laughed and let Frank pull him close, starting to warm up to the interaction and not feeling like complete shit. They really should've talked to Frank sooner, he always seemed to make them feel better. Well, they still usually felt like shit, but he helped a little bit.

Frank had wrapped his arms around Gee, holding them close, when he said, "So, you positive I did nothing wrong?"

Gee snuggled closer to him and replied, "Yeah, I'm positive. It's just been one of those weeks, you know? Absolutely no reason to feel like shit, but I do anyway. I also was kinda scared that if I talked to you I'd accidentally snap at you and make you upset. Or try to push you away. Really I never know what might happen when I'm feeling like this."

Frank leaned his head on their shoulder, "Yeah, okay. But seriously, it would take a lot for you to push me away. Like you'd have to really be trying."

Gee shrugged, "I guess, but I can be real shitty."

Frank raised his eyebrows questioningly, "Why are you trying to make me not like you?"

"I'm not trying to make you not like me! I'm just- I don't actually know what I'm doing."

"Well, I think you're really great and not shitty at all."

Gee laughed, "I'm pretty sure I'm like, at least somewhat shitty." 

Frank rolled his eyes, "Okay, maybe a little shitty, but that's just 'cause everyone is shitty. Overall you aren't actually that shitty."

"I'm pretty shitty."

"Nah, I doubt that."

"You don't know everything about me."

"I know quite a bit about you."

"But not _everything_."

"Okay, well, what is so terrible about you, Gee Way?"

Gee shrugged, "Hard to explain."

"Try to."

"Why do you want to know?"

"Because, it probably isn't too bad."

“It could be, you don’t know.”

“Well, why don’t you tell me?”

“Because-“ Gee sighed and looked down, “I don’t know, it’s dumb- and it’s hard to explain.”

“Well, okay, you don’t have to tell me right now. But, I’m sure it isn’t all that bad.”

Gee looked back at him and smiled, "Thanks, babe. Maybe I'll tell you sometime, it's just... I don't know. I can't exactly explain it, it's like... just kinda a shitty part of me that is kinda uncontrollable?"

"What, are you like a werewolf or something?" Frank asked with a grin.

Gee laughed and shoved Frank playfully, "No, I'm not a werewolf. Although that'd be pretty cool. No, it's just like... I don't know, weird emotional shit?"

"Hm, weird emotional shit versus you turning into a murderous werewolf every month? I think I'd rather deal with weird emotional shit."

"Hey, what if I'm a nice werewolf? Or the sort of werewolf that gets locked up? You don't know my life, Mikey could lock me up every month and you'd have no idea."

"Gee, you text me so much that I'd notice if you stopped texting me long enough to _turn into a wolf_. You're like the master of double texting."

"Is that a problem?" Gee asked nervously.

"Nah, I'm just saying I would probably know by now if you were a werewolf- or any sort of supernatural creature."

"So you don't care that I text you a lot? I don't wanna be annoying."

"No, don't worry, you aren't annoying. I kinda like when you text me a lot, it's like a little glimpse into your head."

Gee smiled again and quickly kissed his cheek, then said, "Okay, cool. I don't want to annoy you. But, feel free to shut me up if I'm ever talking too much about something you don't care about."

"Yeah, okay. Except I kinda like hearing you talk so I probably won't shut you up, even if I really don't care about the subject. I mean, I played D&D with you." Frank giggled.

Gee gasped dramatically, "Are you saying you _don't_ like D &D?"

"No, I'm saying I just don't really care all that much about Daisy's entire backstory and how she got to the place that she is. But, I like hearing you talk about things that you like, so I probably will never shut you up."

Gee grinned, "You're the best." then kissed Frank. He seemed slightly startled at first, but kissed them back softly. Gee turned so their back was pressed against the armrest and one of their legs hanging off the couch- Frank sitting in between their legs. 

They stayed in that position for a while- soft kisses turning more desperate the longer they stayed. Gee ran their fingers through Frank's hair, then trailed their hands up and down his back. Frank let his hands wander down their chest and then down their thigh. He ran his hand up and down their thigh, but Gee pulled away slightly and he stopped, saying, "Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"No- no, it's okay. I just, uhm, yeah. I don't know." Gee blushed and bit their lip, not looking Frank in the eye.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"No, uhm, you don't have to stop." Gee leaned forward and kissed him hesitantly. 

"You don't seem very sure and I don't want you to feel pressured into something you don't want to do." Frank whispered.

"It's okay, I do wanna do this, I'm just a little nervous." 

"Nervous about what we're doing or something else?" Frank asked.

"Uhm, both? I'm just scared someone might walk in on us- like what happened with Mikey and Pete." Gee replied.

"We can stop if you want to."

"No, I don't wanna stop. I mean, no one will probably walk in on us, right? They're all busy sitting in the service, plus people don't really come in here anyway. It's okay, we don't have to stop."

"Yeah, we can continue if you're fine with it." Frank leaned in and kissed Gee, then pulled away and said, "I bet you're excited by the fact that people are nearby." 

Gee blushed and rolled their eyes, "Oh shut up."

"You and I both know it's true."

"I can neither confirm nor deny if that is true."

"Gee, you literally can confirm that."

"Shh, now is not the time to discuss my kinks."

"Now is actually the _perfect_ time to discuss your kinks."

Gee rolled their eyes again, "Would you shut up and kiss me already?"

"So demanding..." Frank grinned, then leaned in and kissed Gee again. 

Their kisses became more passionate and Gee started grinding their hips against Frank's. Frank gasped and started moving against them, matching their movements. He started kissing along their jaw and they tilted their head back, letting him kiss down their neck. It was strange, they had such a drastic mood change from before. Earlier that day they barely could look in the mirror without crying, but now they just really _really_ wanted Frank. 

"Fuck, Gee, I want to blow you so much." Frank moaned, "If you're okay with that." He added.

Gee just bit their lip and nodded. Frank kissed them again before moving down their body, his hands running up and down their thigh. Gee watched his hands move to the button on their jeans and nervously stuttered out, "Have- have you done this before?"

Frank looked up at Gee and laughed softly, "Uh, yeah I have. Nothing more than this, though."

"Oh, okay. Cool. Good to uh, good to know."

"I take it you haven't?"

"I'm a nerdy homeschooler who had their first kiss a _month_ ago, of course I haven't done anything sexual."

"It was more than a month ago, babe. But I kinda figured that, from what I know of you and your life I assumed you probably hadn't had the opportunity."

"Yeah, sadly my life is lacking in sexual situations."

"You're currently in a sexual situation, Gee."

"I know, but now I'm all nervous and can't stop talking but that doesn't mean you have to not suck my dick. Unless my talking is distracting you, then you can just gag me or-"

"Okay, not gonna gag you, but you sure you want me to do this? Like is it nervous in the 'not really sure what to do' way, or nervous in the 'I'm only going along with this because I don't want to annoy you' way?"

"First kind. The uh, 'not really sure what to do' way. I like... I want this, but I can't help being nervous."

"So you want me to do this?"

Gee ran a hand through Frank's hair and replied, "God, yes."

Frank grinned up at them, then went back to undoing their pants. Gee watched his movements closely, trying to distracted themselves from the nervousness building in their stomach. Frank started pulling down their pants and Gee blushed crimson, looking away from Frank. Frank looked back up at Gee and said, "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm okay. Again, just kinda nervous." Gee looked back down at him and smiled slightly. 

Frank smiled back at Gee, then started pulling their underwear down too and oh, wow. Gee never thought about how _awkward_ this would be. Well, it does make sense that it might be awkward, considering someone's face was like 5 inches away from their dick. Now that was a weird thing to think about and Gee wasn't really sure how they felt about it. 

Of course, they probably should be thinking it through more, since that was the current situation they were in. 

Suddenly Frank was taking them into his mouth and they definitely were not thinking about how awkward this was. Frank was taking it slow but they didn't mind. This could technically be the shittiest blow job ever and Gee wouldn't care because _Frank_ was giving them a _blow job_. They still weren't fully convinced that it was actually happening even though, you know, it was actually happening. 

They weren't exactly sure what to do now, though. It felt weird doing this in church- but not bad weird. Just... weird. They always had wanted to do something sexual in church, but they never thought it'd actually happen. But here they were, getting their dick sucked in the back of the church. Of course now they just felt weird and awkward and yeah, it did feel really amazing but they couldn't help being a little scared that someone might walk in.

Gee had their eyes closed and head thrown back, one hand running through Frank's hair and the other shoved into their mouth to suppress any noises they might make. At least now Mikey wouldn't be the only one who had done something sexual because that's totally not fair goddammit. They were older than him like what the fuck. Absolutely ridiculous.

Gee opened their eyes and looked down at Frank and oh jeez that was definitely something they wanted to look at. 

"Jesus, Frank." They moaned, their hand dropping away from their mouth.

Frank pulled off and kissed their thigh, before saying, "You gotta be quiet, babe."

"I know, fuck, I will be. This is just... really great."

Frank grinned up at them, said, "I know." then took them back into his mouth. 

Gee balled their hand into a fist and bit down on it, trying to stay quiet. They did better this time but it was still hard. It felt so good and they wanted it to last, but they could tell it would be over soon. They pulled on Frank's hair slightly and mumbled, "Fuck, Frank, gonna cum."

Frank looked up at Gee and continued what he was doing. Gee moaned and came down his throat. He pulled off and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, then moved up and kissed Gee deeply. He pulled away after a bit and asked, "So, how was that?"

Gee giggled, "Fucking awesome."

"I'm glad." Frank grinned, then helped Gee pull their pants up. After they both had pulled Gee's pants up, Frank leaned in to kiss them again. 

They kissed for a little while longer before Gee pulled away to ask, "Do you want me to reciprocate?" 

"Uhm, only if you want to." Frank replied.

"Yeah, I uh, I want to." 

"Then, yeah, okay. Go for it, babe."

Gee smiled shyly, then leaned in to kiss him again. They were about to reach for the button on Frank's pants, when the door opened and Mikey and Pete walked in.

"Oh, for fuck's sake." Mikey groaned and covered his eyes with his hands, "Get out, we want to cuddle and we can't if you two are being gross."

Gee blushed crimson and Frank muttered an apology as he moved off of Gee. Pete moved over to the couch and started kicking at Gee's leg, saying, "Now get out and be gross elsewhere. We have important business to do."

Mikey nodded solemnly, "Very serious business."

"Yeah, uhm, okay. We can, uh, yeah. We can go." Gee stuttered out as they got off the couch, dragging Frank off with them. They gestured to the door, mumbling a goodbye to Pete and Mikey as Gee walked past them. Mikey grabbed their arm before they could leave and said, "Dude, zip up your pants."

Gee muttered, "oh, fuck." before quickly zipping their pants up and dragging Frank out of the room.

"Well that was embarrassing." Frank laughed when they got out of earshot.

"But still kinda great." 

"Oh, it was totally great. Let's do it again sometime." Frank said and wiggled his eyebrows at Gee.

Gee rolled their eyes, "Yeah, we'll see."


	14. Revelation 13:11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey put his phone away and said, "Pete's in Hot Topic."
> 
> "Mikey, I hate to break this to you but.... your boyfriend is a fucking emo."
> 
> "Implying I didn't already know that." Mikey laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey sorry that I've been updating so slowly and that the chapters have been short I'm kinda hitting a slump writing wise :P I'll try to do better though!!! thanks to everyone who's still sticking around with this fic lmao I hope you like the chapter

Things with Pete were practically back to normal. They had come up with a way around the "no seeing each other" rule, so really there was no difference now as there was before they were caught. The pro's to having strict parents is you know how to sneak around without them finding out.

The con, though, is the paranoia that is constantly following you around like a black cloud, or an annoying fly.

Thankfully, Mikey was able to text Pete again- which he did almost constantly. It was like the lack of seeing each other in person made Mikey really appreciate technology. 

He was currently laying on his bed texting Pete. They were making plans to hang out at the mall later that week- the plans they would tell their parents were that they were also going with Ray and Gerard, but Mikey and Pete would separate from them so they could be alone- and Mikey was excited. He cherished the few times he could hang out with Pete alone, since it was a rare thing nowadays. 

The topic of conversations shifted and Pete started telling Mikey some ridiculous story that "totally happened" and "why won't you believe me, Mikes." It was dumb, but it started making Mikey miss Pete. Which was also dumb, since he had seen Pete the day before at church. But, seeing him t church just wasn't the same. They had to watch their movements to make sure no one got suspicious or tried to separate them. He just wanted to hang out with his boyfriend in peace. _God_.

Mikey was giggling (well, giggling internally) at something Pete had said when Gerard walked into his room. He looked nervous about something and Mikey sat up, ready to ask if anything was wrong.

"So," Gerard started, "Uh, what's up, Mikes?"

He was purposely not looking directly at Mikey- staring at the floor or ceiling- and Mikey knew something was up.

"Dude, just say what you want to say."

"What's that supposed to mean!?"

Mikey rolled his eyes, "It means you obviously came in here to say something specific, so just spill it already. I'm busy."

Gerard crossed his arms and finally looked at Mikey, "You're not busy, you're just texting Pete."

"That makes me busy, Gee."

Now Gerard was the one who rolled his eyes, "Yeah, whatever."

"Okay, but really, what did you want to say?"

"You know, just...." Gerard waved his hand aimlessly, "Stuff."

"What sort of stuff, Gee?"

"...Trans stuff?"

"You're not gonna try to explain what gender is like for you again, right? 'Cause that shit's confusing."

"No! No, I just... could you use they/them pronouns for me?" Gerard said quickly, his words slurring together in a way Mikey didn't fully understand what he said at first.

It then hit him and Mikey said, "Oh, okay. I can do that. Anything else?"

"Uh, could you only refer to me as Gee?" They said, looking awkward and slightly uncomfortable.

"Yeah, I can, dude. That it?"

"Uh, yeah. That's it for now." Gee quickly left his room, running into the doorframe as they left. Mikey laughed, then turned his attention back towards his phone.

\----------

Mikey knew it was dumb, but he couldn't help wanting to look nice whenever he saw Pete. He literally was going to the _mall_ , for god's sake, but he still wanted to look good.

Of course, for Mikey "good" meant slightly tighter skinny jeans and a band t-shirt that wasn't completely disgusting. After he finished changing, he went into the kitchen to see if there was any coffee made. Gee was in there, watching the coffee pot as it slowly filled up.

"Hey." Mikey said, making Gee jump in surprise. Mikey laughed and walked over to them, putting his hand on their shoulder and saying, "Didn't mean to startle you."

Gee rolled their eyes, "I wasn't startled."

"Yes you were, dude. Now, give me coffee."

"It's not done yet."

"Then pass me a mug."

"No, do it yourself."

"You suck, Gee." Mikey leaned across them and opened the cupboard, pulling out a mug for himself. The coffee finished and Gee poured some for them both, then turned around and leaned against the counter. Mikey looked at them and asked, "So, is Frank coming today?"

"Nah, Ray didn't want us third-wheeling him- and Frank didn't want me and Ray to third-wheel _him_ , so..."

Mikey laughed, "Yeah, sounds about right. How are things with you and Frank, anyway?"

Gee blushed and looked down into their coffee mug, "Things are good."

"How good?" Mikey smirked.

"If this is about last Wednesday, I swear to god..."

"I just can't believe you did that at _church_. Unbelievable. You're both going to hell."

Gee gaped at him, "You don't even know what we did!"

Mikey rolled his eyes, "But you did _something_ , and really that's all that matters."

"Implying you wouldn't do something with Pete at church, if you had the chance."

"Okay, _maybe_ , but you're still going to hell."

Gee laughed, "Well obviously."

Mikey finished his coffee, then went to his room to grab his phone before they left for the mall. The drive wasn't long and soon they were there. Mikey almost felt nervous, he was afraid that they'd randomly run into their parents and be taken away from Pete yet again. That was very unlikely, but you never know. Parents were weird like that.

They pulled into the mall parking lot and got out of the car. They started walking in when Gee asked, "So, wait, where are we meeting them?"

Mikey shrugged, "I dunno."

"Terrible. Well, I forgot to bring my phone, so just text Pete asking where he is."

"Or we could go on a _scavenger hunt_ for him."

"Mikey, please... I don't want to be involved in your weird sex stuff..."

Mikey laughed and slapped Gee's arm, "Shut up, I'm joking. But yeah, I'll text Pete."

Mikey took his phone out of his pocket and texted Pete, saying, ' _hey pete where r you'_

 _'im in hot topic,'_ Pete replied

Mikey snorted, _'oh my god u fucking emo'_  

_'ur more emo then me'_

_'thats a fucking lie and u know it'_

_'whatever. im in hot topic meet me if u want. love u'_

_'love u 2'_

Mikey put his phone away and said, "Pete's in Hot Topic."

"Mikey, I hate to break this to you but.... your boyfriend is a fucking emo."

"Implying I didn't already know that." Mikey laughed.

Gee giggled, "Okay, just double checking."

They headed in the direction of Hot Topic and a grin spread across Mikey's face when he saw Pete leaning against the wall outside of the store. He was wearing a beanie and had earphones in. Mikey ran up to him and wrapped his arms around him tightly. Pete yelped, then started laughing and hugged Mikey back. Mikey could practically feel Gee rolling their eyes behind him, but he didn't care. He was just happy to see Pete. 

Mikey finally pulled away from Pete when he heard Gee clearing their throat pointedly behind him. He turned to look at Gee and asked, "What?"

"Uhm, Ray and I are gonna go," Gee waved their hand behind them vaguely, "Over there. Bye, have fun you two."

Mikey watched Ray and Gee walk away for a second, before turning around to face Pete again. A smile spread across his face again and he said, "So hey."

"Yeah, hey." Pete smiled back, then leaned up and quickly kissed Mikey. Mikey blushed and Pete started grinning, saying, "You're adorable."

Mikey shoved him lightly, "Oh, shut up."

"What? It's true! You're honestly so cute, Mikeyway." Pete took both of Mikey's hands in his own and started swinging them back and forth. 

Mikey rolled his eyes, "Yeah, 'course I am. But what do you wanna do?"

Pete shrugged, "We can just walk around and see what happens?"

"Sounds good."

They started walking around, still holding hands. Mikey felt good being around Pete, like he could really be himself. 

"So," Pete started, "Quick question, what would you do if I dyed my hair pink?"

Mikey snorted, "I'd dump your ass."

"Damn, I guess that means you're single." Pete grinned, then pulled his beanie off to reveal that his hair was pink.

Mikey laughed and shook his head, "Shit, I can't believe you actually dyed your hair pink. I'm amazed."

"Do you like?" Pete asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

Mikey rolled his eyes, "Actually, yeah, I do like. I was kidding about the dumping you thing."

Pete's grin widened, "I'm glad you like it! It'd be _super_ awkward if you didn't like it."

Mikey draped his arm around Pete's shoulders and pulled him close, "Yeah, good thing I do like it. You are an idiot, though. How do your parents feel about it?"

"Ah, well, you see... they don't exactly _know_."

"Wow, aren't you just the little rebel. How'd you manage that?"

"I did it at Patrick's house and then have just been wearing a lot of hats."

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes again, "Oh my god, you're ridiculous. But hey, at least you look cute with the pink hair."

Pete grinned at Mikey, "Awh, you think I look cute?"

"Of course I do, dumbass." Mikey kissed the top of Pete's head and pointedly ignored the bad looks a women gave them. He didn't care what people thought right then, he was just happy to be near Pete. He almost wanted to be more in-your-face couple-y with Pete, but figured that probably wouldn't be a good idea. This would do.

"Pete? Mikey?" Josh's voice came from behind them, and Mikey mumbled "fuck" before pulling away from Pete.

He turned to face Josh, fake smile on his face, and said, "Yo, what's up, Josh? I see you dyed your hair again."

"Yeah, I did." Josh replied, running a hand through his now red hair before adding, "But, I'm just hanging out with Ashley." He gestured to Ashley with his free hand, his other hand was being held by her. Pete raised an eyebrow at that and Josh rolled his eyes, "What? You guys were being worse than this."

Mikey blushed and looked at the ground, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Josh laughed, "You know what I mean. But how are things going with you two? Also, nice hair, Pete."

"Yeah, you too." Pete grinned and high fived Josh, saying, "Hair dye buds."

Mikey put his arm around Pete's shoulders again and said, "But, uh, we're doing good. It's a little stressful at some times, but overall okay."

"I'm glad! I'm still really sorry about Tyler, that was a dick move on his part. I'm trying to get him better about this stuff but he's uh, not taking it well."

Mikey snorted, "Well that's not a surprise."

Josh shrugged, "Yeah, it isn't. I am trying, though."

"I asked Josh if I could have a go at Tyler, but he said that he didn't want me to 'scare Tyler' or something." Ashley said with a laugh.

"I didn't say that! I just said that he probably wouldn't take well to your bluntness. You both are too stubborn in your beliefs- I'd end up just having to break up a fight."

Ashley rolled her eyes, "Yeah, whatever. I still think I could educate him on this stuff."

"Maybe, _or_ I can just slowly try to educate him on this stuff?"

"Yeah, yeah. That works too."

Pete leaned his head on Mikey's shoulder, "So how long have you guys been together exactly? I think I already knew you two were dating, but when did it start?"

Josh shrugged, "A month or so? I can't really remember."

"Yeah, that seems about right."

"Nice, you guys work together. Although it was better when you both had blue hair." Mikey said.

"But now we like, balance each other out or some shit." Ashley giggled.

"Exactly! It works out. Now it's not all blue, it's just... partially blue."

Ashley grinned, "Yeah! We're partially blue instead of full blue."

Mikey laughed, "You guys are adorable."

Ashley's grin got bigger and she said, "Thanks! So are you guys!" 

"Oh! Slightly unrelated, but I just wanna brag. Guess who I'm seeing live." Josh said, wiggling his eyebrows.

Mikey groaned, "Oh god, I don't wanna know. It's probably someone really cool." 

"It's House of Heroes." Josh said excitedly.

"Fuck you."

"Wow, so rude, Pete. Be happy for us!"

"I didn't even realize they're coming here, what the hell."

"Wait, what do you mean by 'us'?" Mikey asked.

"I'm going with Ashley! It's gonna be a date!!" Josh was grinning widely and Mikey just couldn't hate him.

"And they aren't coming here, we have to drive like, 5 fucking hours to get to the venue. But it is _worth it_." Ashley added.

"Hey, hey Josh. You should totally ditch Ashley and bring me instead." Pete said in a fake whisper.

"What about Mikey?" Josh replied, in the same fake whisper that Pete had used.

"We'll ditch him too. They can cry together while we totally jam out."

Mikey rolled his eyes, "Wow, I can't believe this. Being betrayed by my boyfriend over concert tickets. Unbelievable."

"Hey, my boyfriend is ditching me too. We can team up and wreck 'em." Ashley said with a grin.

"Good plan! How do we do that?"

"Pop their tires before they can leave and steal the tickets from them for ourselves."

Mikey turned to Pete, "Sorry, I'm going with Ashley's plan. No hard feelings?"

"No hard feelings. I was gonna ditch you first anyway." Pete replied.

"I'm glad we're still on good terms. Love you, babe."

"Love you, too." Pete kissed Mikey on the cheek and Mikey laughed. They were getting weird looks again, but Ashley glared at the person and Mikey decided that he wanted to be closer friends with her.

"Well, we were actually about to leave. So, see you guys later!" Josh said, waving as he and Ashley walked away.

Pete watched them walk off for a few seconds, then turned back to Mikey and said, "You think we could get away with making out in a dressing room?"

Mikey grinned, "We can try!"


	15. Isaiah 3:9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They barged in and said, "Mikey, Frank invited me to a party."
> 
> Mikey was laying on his bed, reading a book and looking bored with life. He glanced at Gee and said, "Okay? I care why?"
> 
> "What do I do?"
> 
> "I... I don't know? Go to the party?" Mikey replied, making it seem like it was totally obvious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: there's a lot of alcohol consumption and mental illness talks (some talk of suicide but nothing too in depth) in this chapter just fyi
> 
> also sorry for taking so long to update i am a lazy piece of shit

There were a few things Gee didn't believe actually happened in real life and were only a thing that happened in teen movies.

Thing number one: that people could actually get into a relationship during high school. Obviously there was evidence all around them that proved this wrong, but they still had their doubts that it was all some ruse. Of course, Frank officially proved that this was an incorrect thing to think. Yes, Gee was almost done with high school, but they still technically were in high school so it counted.

Thing number two: that some teens actually threw huge parties when their parents left the house for the weekend. This was also proven wrong by Frank, who sent Gee a text earlier that afternoon that said, _'yo parents r away 4 the weekend. having a party. theres gonna be booze and me. wanna come? (mikey is optional)'_

Now, Gee's first thought was, _'the fuck? Mikey is never optional'_  but this was immediately followed by, ' _wait, shit, was I just invited to a party?'_

This, of course, was new territory for Gee. first of all, they probably wouldn't know anyone at said party because it would only be Frank's friends. This set warning bells off in Gee's head, but they tried to push these to the side to get to the second thing, which was _'fuck, by booze does he mean alcohol or does he mean something else that's referred to as booze?'_ That set off a completely new set of warning bells in Gee's mind, but those were easier to push into the "shut up shut up shut _up_ " category. It's not like Gee had never drunk alcohol before- they actually (surprisingly) had- it was just that last time they were alone with Ray, not near who knows how many strangers that were friends with Gee's boyfriend.

Man, this is why Gee never did anything, they just overanalyzed and worried too much about everything- even the smallest of things. They hadn't even replied to Frank's text yet and it had already been an hour- which was a totally long span of time considering Gee usually replied to Frank within the minute. 

Gee had been laying on their bed, staring at the ceiling and trying to figure out what to say. They wanted to say yes, but they also were scared as fuck. They didn't want to freak out and come off as a total loser in front of Frank's friends (even though they _were_ a total loser).

They picked their phone up and stared at the text for the 500th time in the past hour. They decided that enough was enough and typed out a quick reply of, _'mikeys never optional. but yeah i'll be there. see u babe.'_ They figured that that was safe enough, even though it _really_ shouldn't be that big of a deal. 

Frank's reply came a little quicker then Gee was expecting, so they got started when their phone vibrated to show that they had a new text. 

_'sick. u finally get to meet my totally cool friend group who arent losers in any way.'_ Was what Frank had said.

Gee laughed and replied with, _'i bet theyre as cool as ur totally cool girlfriend'_

_'oh theyre actually way cooler :/'_

Gee rolled their eyes, _'shit something came up looks like i cant actually come to ur party :/ sorry frankie :////'_

_'sorrryyyy :( ur totally cool babe. tell mikey he can bring pete if he wants'_

_'theyre totally gonna gay up ur party tho'_

_'gee these r my friends. theyre all gaying up the party'_

_'i see ur point'_

_'u should wear the dress i got you to it. u look good in it'_

Gee blushed, _'oh shush ur just saying that so u can get in my pants'_

_'is it working?'_

_'maybe'_

_'see u then gee ;)'_

Gee giggled and covered their face with their arm, then got up and quickly went to Mikey's room. They barged in and said, "Mikey, Frank invited me to a party."

Mikey was laying on his bed, reading a book and looking bored with life. He glanced at Gee and said, "Okay? I care why?"

"What do I do?"

"I... I don't know? Go to the party?" Mikey replied, making it seem like it was totally obvious.

"It's not that simple!" Gee said, running their fingers through their hair in frustration.

"It kinda is, Gee. Why are you freaking out so much?" Mikey put his book down and sat up, patting the bed beside him. Gee sighed and went to sit next to him.

"I haven't met his friends before, Mikey."

"So you're totally freaking out and thinking that they're gonna hate you?" Mikey suggested.

"Yup, that about sums it up."

Mikey patted Gee on the back, "Don't worry, they aren't gonna hate you."

"But they _might_ , Mikey. They might."

"Okay, technically they might hate you-"

"You're just great at this encouraging thing, Mikes." Gee said sarcastically.

"I wasn't finished!" Mikey huffed, then continued, "What I was saying, is technically there is a chance that they could hate you, but that is a very slim chance. If they like Frank, they're probably gonna like you."

"But Frank is so much cooler _than_ me."

"No offense, but Frank is a complete loser."

Gee rolled their eyes, "He is _not_!"

"Yes, he is. You're just blinded by love."

"I don't love him, jeez..." Gee muttered.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just, I don't know, act natural?"

"I don't know how! Please help me."

"What, help you deal in a normal social situation? What makes you think I know what to do?"

Gee groaned and laid down, "Fuck, I don't know. I just don't wanna look like an idiot."

"Gee, you are an idiot."

Gee laughed, "You got me there."

"Just, y'know, try to enjoy yourself a little bit? Stay near Frank or something."

"Yeah, yeah, I will." Gee sighed, then got up and was about to leave before they remembered to add, "Oh, by the way, he invited you and Pete too."

"Wait, seriously? When is this exactly?" Mikey asked.

"This weekend? Don't know the exact day yet but I'll keep you updated." Gee did finger guns at Mikey, before finally leaving his room. They still were freaking out, but they tried to calm down- at least for the time being. They had a couple days to prepare anyway, so they would probably be fine by the day of the party.

\----------

They were not fine the day of the party. In fact, they actually kinda felt like shit, but they pushed those feelings down and instead starting worrying about what to wear. 

Obviously they'd wear the dress Frank got them, but they didn't know what else to wear. They probably wouldn't be able to get away with wearing a full face if makeup, but they _really_ wanted to try. They could just put it on and then quickly leave the house before their parents could see them. But they also didn't want to push their luck with Frank- he did say that he didn't think of them as a boy, but they didn't want to push him away by being too feminine.

Fuck, this was annoying to deal with.

Gee decided to just say "fuck it" and go with the makeup. The worst that could happen is having their parents see and getting yelled at and grounded forever- or having their boyfriend leave them because he decided he didn't want to be with someone like them. Really those weren't even bad options- totally, totally not bad options.

Mikey knocked on their door and walked in. He sat on their bed and said, "So, are you gonna pick Pete up?"

"Mhm." Gee replied, only half paying attention to Mikey because they didn't want to fuck up their eyeliner.

"What are you gonna do if mom and dad see you like that?"

"Pray to God that they don't kill me or throw me out."

"Ah, got it." Mikey sat there watching them do their makeup for a little bit, before saying, "So, you sure are getting dolled up."

"What? Can't a girl dress up once in awhile?" Gee turned to Mikey and raised their eyebrows.

Mikey rolled his eyes, "I'm just saying, looks like you're trying to impress someone. Maybe a certain boyfriend...."

Gee threw a lipstick at Mikey's head and he ducked, covering his mouth to suppress laughter. Gee mumbled something about "fucking brothers," before turning back to the mirror and finishing up with their makeup. They tried to look at themselves as if they were looking at a stranger, but they could only think negative things. They looked fucking dumb, is what they looked, and they were starting to regret this entire thing.

"You know what, we can't go." They announced, suddenly feeling like complete shit.

"What? Why not?" Mikey asked, sounding disappointed.

"I just... I can't. I'm sorry, Mikey, I knew you were looking forward to hanging out with Pete." Gee sighed and collapsed into their desk chair, burying their face in their arms. They heard Mikey getting off the bed and walking over to them. He put his hand on their shoulder and said, "Is everything alright?"

"No." Gee replied, "I look like a fucking joke."

"No you don't, you look nice."

Gee looked up at Mikey and mumbled, "You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"No, I'm saying it because it's true, you ass."

Gee sat up and looked at Mikey completely, "You sure?"

Mikey sighed and rolled his eyes, "Yes, I'm sure. Please don't bail out now."

"I think you're just saying this so that I will let you hang out with Pete."

Mikey shrugged, "You caught me. But I actually do think you look nice."

Gee turned back to the mirror, "I don't see it."

"That's because you hate yourself, Gee."

Gee turned and slapped Mikey's leg, "Shut up, you dick."

"What? You know it's true!"

"You suck."

"I'm just saying facts here, Gee." 

Gee laughed and slapped him again, before getting up and saying, "Okay, okay, we're still going. I'm sure it will be great."

Mikey grinned, "Hell yeah! C'mon, let's go. Pete's house is in a completely different direction then Frank's."

\----------

Gee practically sprint past their parents and out the door, making sure that they wouldn't notice what Gee was wearing. Mikey followed them out to the car, getting in the passenger seat. It wasn't a long drive to Pete's house, and Gee and Mikey spent it in silence- well, as silent as any drive with them could be. The music was blaring, the windows were down, and Gee was starting to feel a little better about their appearance.

They got to Pete's house after not long. He was sitting outside, looking down at his phone. Gee honked and laughed when it visibly startled him. He got up and walked over to the car, glaring at Gee as he got in.

"Hi Pete." Gee looked back at him and grinned.

"You could've just texted me, y'know."

"But where's the fun in that?"

Pete rolled his eyes, then leaned forward and kissed Mikey on the cheek, mumbling, "Your brother is a dick, babe."

Mikey laughed, "Yeah, I know."

Pete turned to Gee and said, "Anyway, let's go..." His voice trailed off as he looked at Gee more closely and Gee stiffened.

"I, uhm, I don't-" Gee started.

Pete waved them off, "I don't care, dude. You do you. I actually like the dress, where'd you get it?"

"Uhm, Frank got it for me..." Gee replied, blushing lightly.

Pete grinned, "Awh, how romantic. But c'mon, let's go. I wanna see how far I can get with Mikey in Frank's house."

"Pete!" Mikey exclaimed and slapped Pete on the arm.

"What? You know you wanna try it."

"Okay, _maybe_." Mikey turned to Gee, "You've been to Frank's house, right? How many back rooms does he have? Like, y'know, rooms that two teenage boys could possibly sneak off to to-"

"OH MY _GOD_ I'm not gonna help you guys hook up at my boyfriend's house, thank you very much." Gee glared at Mikey and Pete started laughing.

"Gee, please, do this for us." Pete leaned forward again.

"No, shut up. Also, put your seatbelt on. I will not be responsible if we crash and you die because you're an idiot."

Mikey turned around to face Pete, "Gee's right- put your seatbelt on, Pete."

Pete rolled his eyes, "Yeah, yeah. I will."

"Good." Gee said, then added, "Also, no fucking in my boyfriend's house."

Pete rolled his eyes, "Gee, stop being such a killjoy."

"I will be a killjoy if I _want_ to be a killjoy."

Mikey snorted, "I don't think that's something you should want to be, dude."

"Fucking watch me."

\----------

They arrived at Frank's house as the sun was setting. Gee was starting to feel nervous all over again. They had mostly been too distracted inside the car to really think about it, but now that they were at Frank's house they were starting to panic. Mikey seemed to sense this and squeezed Gee's shoulder reassuringly. They smiled slightly at Mikey, then took a deep breath and walked up to Frank's front door. They hesitated slightly, but Pete walked past them and knocked on the door loudly. 

There was yelling from inside and Gee heard someone approaching the door. They started panicking as the door swung open, revealing a tall girl standing in the doorway.

"Who are you?" She asked, looking at the three of them suspiciously.

"Uhm.. my name's Ger- Gee." Gee replied, feeling intimidated by this girl.

"Ah shit, you're _real_?" The girl exclaimed just as Frank walked up beside her.

"Laura, what the fuck are you doing?" Frank asked, looking at her in annoyance. Gee had to suppress a giggle at how short Frank looked beside the girl- Laura.

"I'm just greeting your guests!"

Frank rolled his eyes, "Yeah, whatever. Anyway- hey Gee! Come in!!"

"Hello to you too." Pete said with a laugh.

"Oh, shit. I didn't notice you." Frank laughed, "Hey Pete, hey Mikey."

Mikey walked past Frank, "You don't have to play nice, we both know you're way too distracted by Gee to think clearly."

Frank gaped at Mikey and Gee blushed crimson. Laura laughed and said, "Well I see why. But seriously, I can't believe you're actually re-"

" _SO,_ Gee, you still haven't come in. What's up with that?" Frank said, glaring at Laura slightly.

Gee walked inside and shrugged, "I just hadn't walked in. But why does Laura keep sounding surprised that I'm real?"

Frank groaned and Laura started laughing. A tall guy walked in then, holding a cup and saying, "Yo, Frank, that's where you are. Who's this?" He gestured towards Gee and they kind of wanted to find a small closet to hide in.

"This is _Gee_!" Laura replied, a grin spreading across her face.

"Oh shit seriously? Damn, I owe Evan 5 bucks."

"You guys bet on whether or not I made up a fake girlfriend?!" Frank said, looking shocked.

Mikey started laughing, "Why would you think Gee was fake? That's just ridiculous."

"Yeah, I gotta agree with Mikey on this. How could you think I was _fake_?" Gee asked, looking at them in confusion.

"Listen, he said that you were this 'super hot and cool queer person' that he met at _church_ , we are going to have our doubts." Laura replied.

"Not to mention he kept insisting that we would never have met you because you are homeschooled and only ever go to said church." The other guy added.

"So you can see how we would be suspicious."

"Well, if you put it like that, I would find it fake sounding too." Pete said.

"Okay, quick question: who are these two?" The tall guy asked, pointing at Mikey and Pete.

"I'm Pete, this is Mikey." Pete replied, grinning widely.

"Oh my god, Frank wasn't lying about them either, was he?"

"Lying about _what_ , exactly?" Mikey asked, looking at Frank questioningly.

"They didn't believe me that a church could have that many gay kids in it." Frank replied.

Pete snorted, "They should see Ryland's youth group."

"Y'know I feel sorry for Ryland- he has to deal with like, 5 gay kids." Mikey said.

"I don't think Brent's gay."

"Fine, four out of five of the kids are gay."

"Wait, who are these people?" Frank asked.

Gee patted him on the shoulder, "You'll meet them at summer camp."

Pete grinned and slapped Mikey's arm excitedly, "He'll also meet _Gabe_!"

"Oh shit he will!"

Laura laughed, "Wow, I guess we should have given Frank the benefit of the doubt. He really did find the gayest church in this area."

"I still have no idea who Gabe is." Frank mumbled to Gee.

Gee put their arm around Frank's shoulders, "He's this guy who volunteers every year at summer camp, but he's like... ridiculously flirty with William."

Pete snorted, "They do more than flirt, dude."

Gee rolled their eyes, "It's not like they actually have done stuff, Pete, they are just really, _really_ flirty."

"Yeah, but I have definitely seen them both eye-fucking each other at separate times so..." Pete shrugged and pleased with himself, as if he had proven some huge point.

"Not to mention all those game days where Bill kept getting distracted because Gabe was shirtless and he couldn't stop staring at him." Mikey added.

Gee crossed their arms, "Fine, whatever. They do more than flirt. But they aren't like, actually dating or anything."

"They could be! They would just have to hide it really well because they're youth leaders." Pete pointed out.

"He does have a point, Gee." 

Gee groaned, "Oh my god, okay, fine. I still don't think they're actually together. I feel like they both _want_ to be together, but are too scared to actually do anything."

"Wow," The tall guy laughed, "I feel really out of the loop. I have no idea who any of these people are."

Frank patted him on the shoulder, "It's okay, Rob, I only know who like, half of the people they're talking about."

Laura suddenly put her hands on Gee's shoulders and said, "Okay, I'm gonna give you my 'momma hen' talk, because I do this with everyone Frank dates and really he should warn people by now."

Frank groaned, "You really don't have to do that, Laura."

"Shush! We've talked about this, Frank. I just gotta go over some basic things, alright?"

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." Frank grumbled.

Laura grinned and patted Gee's shoulders, "Perfect! Now, c'mon Gee, let's go."

She shoved Gee slightly in the direction of a doorway and Gee stumbled forward, tripping over their feet and almost falling over. They heard a soft "whoops" coming from Laura followed by a laugh from Mikey. Gee glared at Mikey then ran a hand through their hair as they followed Laura out of the room. Gee had to admit, they were kind of nervous. Laura seemed like she could be really scary if she wanted to be. Gee just hoped she would go easy on them because _oh boy_ they were a nervous pile of shit.

One thing noticed was that there was actually quite a few people here. Now, if they were all close friends or just acquaintances Gee didn't know, but what they _did_ know was that they had probably not met this many people in their  _life_. Okay, maybe they were exaggerating, but it was still a lot of people and Gee was starting to feel a little nauseous.

Laura pulled Gee into what they realized was a laundry room. She leaned up against the washing machine and crossed her arms, staring Gee down. She just kept staring at them and they were starting to get really nervous. Finally, she leaned forward and said, "So, you're the one Frank has been talking about non-stop for the past couple months."

Gee nodded and then started to babble, "Uh, yeah? I guess. I mean, unless he actually isn't talking about me at all and is, in fact, talking about someone completely different from me. Obviously I don't know what he's been saying, so really it could be someone completely different than me and-"

"Yup, he was talking about you, alright. He always mentions how you babble when you're nervous and how it's 'totally adorable.'"

Gee blushed crimson and look at their feet, pulling at their hair roughly. Fuck, if Laura was trying to scare them it was _working_. Well, they were scared the minute they got up that morning, but that is completely irrelevant.

A hand landed on Gee's hand and stopped them from pulling out all their hair. They looked up at Laura and she smiled softly, "He also mentioned that you pull on your hair when you're nervous. Don't worry, I don't hate you or anything. I just like to put the fear of god into people's hearts if they date Frankie- or anyone I'm close friends with. But Frank- Frank and I have been friends a _long_ time. He's one of the only remaining people who knew me before I came out as trans. He's... he's like a brother to me, and so I will protect him no matter what, okay? Like, like Mikey is your brother, right?"

Gee nodded in response and Laura continued, "So, you know what I'm talking about, right? You would beat the shit out of Pete of he hurt Mikey in any way, right?"

Gee snorted, "I'd probably murder the little asshole."

Laura laughed, "Exactly! Same goes for me and Frank. I'm very protective of him, and he's protective of me too. He's gotten a into a lot of trouble defending me before- that's actually why he started having to come to church in the first place."

Gee tilted their head in confusion, "Really?"

"Yeah, did he not tell you? He got into one too many fights at school and his parents decided that maybe, just _maybe_ church could sort him out. Didn't work out too well with the whole 'prone to fighting transphobic assholes' thing, but he does seem a lot happier nowadays." She put her hand on Gee's shoulder and squeezed it softly, "You make him really happy, Gee. I can see it in his eyes when he talks about you. I don't think you would hurt him, but if you do I will _destroy_ your ass, got it?"

Gee laughed and shook their head, their hair falling into their face, "Yeah, I got it. You don't have to worry, I would never purposefully hurt Frank. I might like, accidentally spill coffee on him at some point? Because I'm extremely clumsy but I don't think that counts."

Laura grinned, "Yeah, don't worry, that doesn't count. Also, breaking up with him doesn't necessarily mean that you hurt him, you know? If you legitimately don't want to be with him, then for the love of god don't continue being with him. Relationships aren't just about one-sided happiness, both people should get something out of it. Not even like, physically or anything. Just if you stop getting positive things from your relationship and if it starts feeling draining to continue dating Frank, I would actually get mad at you for staying with him. You gotta take care of yourself too, y'know?"

Gee gaped at Laura for a moment, before giggling and saying, "Wow, I understand why Frank calls you the mom of your group. You barely even know me and you're acting like a total mom."

Laura patted them on the shoulder again, "It's what I do best. But if you become a huge dick to Frank you'll see the _other_ side to my mom-ness. The scarier, more vengeful side. You do not want to see that side."

Gee raised their hands in defense "Trust me, I know I don't. I won't be a dick to Frank, though. I promise."

"Great! Glad we got that cleared up." She moved back so she was leaning against the washing machine and crossed her arms again. She ran a hand through her hair and said, "I gotta admit, I'm happy Frank is finally starting make more trans friends. I mean, it's not like his friends are transphobic or anything, they're just all cis. All of them. I am literally the only trans person in this group and it _sucks_. But hey, at least now I have you! We can hang out and whine about how terrible cis people are while also fending off shitty transphobic people. We could make a good team, I think. You seem cool."

Gee beamed at her, "That would be awesome. Like, same with the cis thing. All of my close friends- which, is only like three people- aren't transphobic, but man it would be great to have more trans friends. But, you seem cool too."

"Damn right, I'm cool." She held up her hand and Gee high fived her, then she said, "But seriously. You, me, hanging out. Drinking coffee. Talking about comics. Fending off hordes of the cis. It'll be great."

"Coffee? Comic? Fending off cis people? You just described my perfect day. Lets do it sometime."

"Fuck yes! Now come on, we should probably go back to the other people- before Frank thinks I killed you or something else just as ridiculous."

Gee giggled, "You're probably right."

The two of them left the laundry and headed back in the direction they came. The others weren't in the foyer anymore, but Laura just guided them towards the living room. It's not like Gee had never been to Frank's house before, they had just spent most of their time in his room. Not doing anything sexual, just watching movies and maybe making out a little bit. But still, they had no idea where anything was in Frank's house and were thankful for Laura's guiding hand.

Frank was sitting on a couch with Rob and another guy who was wearing glasses and whose name Gee didn't know. Pete and Mikey were sharing an armchair and Gee suppressed the urge to roll their eyes at them. Frank beamed when he saw Gee and motioned them towards him. There wasn't much space left on the couch and Gee felt awkward walking over to it. They were about to sit on the ground when Frank rolled his eyes and pulled them onto his lap. They yelped and started blushing crimson when Frank laughed and kissed their cheek.

"Shit, you weren't lying, Rob. Frankie _does_ have a girlfriend." The guy with glasses said with a grin, "You know what that means, right?"

Rob rolled his eyes, "Yeah, yeah. I don't have any money with me, but I'll give you your money next time I see you."

The guy- who Gee was realizing must be the guy Evan that Rob had mentioned earlier- pouted dramatically and said, "How do I know you won't back out on this?"

"Because I'm not an asshole, obviously."

"You _could_ keep delaying it until we're both dead."

"Yes, but why the fuck would I do that? It's only 5 dollars."

"I still can't believe you took a bet on this. You guys are dicks, you know? Complete dicks. You are officially not my friends anymore." Frank said, glaring at Rob and Evan jokingly.

"How could we not bet on this? You and Laura always bet on shit we do." Rob pointed out.

"Yeah, but-" Suddenly a dog ran towards Frank, then stopped and noticed Mikey and Pete. It walked over to them and started barking loudly, interrupting what Frank had been saying. Frank rolled his eyes and pushed Gee to the side, then got up and grabbed the dog. He sat down beside it and pulled it into his lap. It wiggled around a little but he held it down, laughing a little. 

"Sorry about him, he's kinda fucked up for a dog." Frank said as it growled at Mikey. He patted its head and added, "We coddle him because he has PTSD."

It was a funny looking dog, with long, multicolored hair and a black snout. Not only were its legs too short for its body, but its body was way longer than most dogs. It looked like someone mixed a corgi and a german shepherd and also threw in maybe a lizard into the mix. Basically, it was just a really weird looking dog, but also _really_ fucking adorable. Gee was in love. 

The dog lunged at Mikey and Frank grabbed it by it's collar and pulled it closer to him. He started stroking its head and whispering, "Shh baby is okay." into the dog's ear.

Rob nudged Gee and whispered, "I think he's found a new love, dude."

Gee and Rob started giggling and Frank looked up at Gee and Rob. He squinted at the two of them and said, "What are you two laughing at?"

"We're laughing at you and your new love, Frankie." Rob replied with a wink. 

Frank rolled his eyes and pulled the dog closer, "He's not my new love, he's my _constant_ love. I've loved him since I got him and I will not stop loving him."

"Frank stop cuddling your dog and help me carry these drinks that I promised to get everyone, before I realized I only have two hands." Laura yelled from the other room and Frank rolled his eyes, but got up anyway. The two came back with their arms full of cups. Frank gave one to Evan, then one to Gee, then he sat back down- this time he was sitting on Gee.

Gee had no idea what was in the cup Frank had given them, but what they knew was it was strong as fuck. They started coughing and sputtering after the first sip, but they liked the way it felt going down their throat- even if it did make them cough all over Frank. Evan laughed at them and asked, "First time drinking?"

Gee rolled their eyes, "Actually, no."

"Wait, seriously?" Frank said, looking slightly surprised.

"Yeah, there was this one time with Ray like, forever ago. We were like 13 I think? Anyway, his parents were gone for the weekend and we found his dad's stash. Then, well, one thing lead to the other and let's just say I don't know for certain if you're my first kiss, Frank."

Frank started giggling loudly, "Holy shit, how is this the first time I've heard about this?"

Gee shrugged, "I don't know, you probably don't know a lot of things."

"Wait, when did this thing with Ray happen?" Mikey asked.

"That was back when you were like 8 and we hated each other, Mikes."

"Oh shit I remember when you guys hated each other. That's fucking weird to think about, since you two are like fucking attached at the hip now." Pete said with a laugh.

"You guys used to hate each other?" Frank asked.

"Yeah, back when we were like, 10." Gee replied. 

"That's so _weird_! I don't see how that could work, you guys are so close." Frank sounded so baffled and Gee started laughing.

"People change, dude! Also we used to share a room and let me tell you, we both desperately need space. It was terrible, we practically got into brawls with each other every week!"

Mikey started to laugh too, saying, It was more like every _day_. We were fucking aggressive 5 year olds."

"You keep lowering the ages of when you hated each other." Laura pointed out.

"That's because we both have shit memory and can't remember the exact timeline. But it happened, oh boy did it happen."

"Trust me, it totally did happen." Pete said, then added, "I had to deal with Mikey bitching to me about Gee all the time."

Mikey slapped Pete's leg, "You always bitched to me about shit that didn't really matter too!"

"I know I did. We were like 8, yet full of bitterness."

"I've been bitter since the day I was born." Gee said, trying to keep a straight face.

"I think you mean guilty."

"Shut the fuck up, Mikey."

"What? I'm just saying that you feel guilty about _everything_. You feel guilty receiving gifts, Gee."

"Oh my god." Gee groaned and buried their face into Frank's back. He was trying to hide his laughter by taking a drink, but Gee could feel him vibrating slightly from laughter. Gee moved their face from Frank's back and took a large gulp from their drink. It burned their throat but they didn't cough this time. It burned in a way that was enjoyable, so Gee started drinking it quicker.

\---------

Things got blurry after that. Gee vaguely remembered getting into an in depth conversation with Laura about their comic idea, and singing loudly along to a song they actually recognized, but they mostly weren't sure what was happening. It probably didn't help that they kept getting more drinks, but they didn't care. The more they drank, the less anxious they felt. The less anxious they felt, the more they were able to socialize normally. 

A song started playing that Gee decided they liked _very_ much, thank you, so they stood up and pulled Frank with them, making him dance. He was pressed close and laughing loudly in their year and god, it felt so _good_. They felt like they were on top of the world, like they could do anything and no one could stop them. They had felt like this before, but that was more natural and not because they were full of alcohol. Someone was wolf-whistling at them and Gee laughed, tilting their head back and grinning widely as Frank started to kiss along their jaw.

It started to get fuzzy again, but Gee remembered Frank pulling them out of the living room, up the stairs, pushing them against a wall and kissing them deeply while running his hand up and down their thigh. Their skirt was all bunched up and their makeup was probably a mess- they were probably a mess- but Gee didn't have a thought in their mind except _Frank_.

Then Frank was pushing them into his room, barely parting from Gee to turn the lights on and to close the door behind him. He lead them over to his bed, his mouth practically stuck leaving kisses along their neck. He pushed them onto the bed and they couldn't help giggling as they fell down. Frank grinned and kissed them again, before pulling back slightly and saying, "You're cute, Gee."

Gee scrunched up their face, "No I'm not."

"Shush." Frank kissed them quickly, "'Course you're cute. You're like... very cute."

"I'm not cute, I'm-" Gee stopped to blow a strand of hair from their face, then continued, "I'm like... very ugly and all... _weird_."

Frank sat up so he was kneeling between their legs and said, "And how exactly are you weird?"

"Just like," They let out a soft frustrated noise and gestured at their body, " _Weird_."

"You're not weird, babe." Frank mumbled, then leaned down and kissed them again. Gee kissed back, but suddenly started feeling extremely self conscious about themselves. They tried to push it to the back of their mind, though, focusing only on the way it felt to have Frank on top of them. It helped somewhat, but they still felt a sudden emptiness in their stomach- like their life had just been sucked out of them.

Frank pulled back again and said, "You alright? Like... how drunk are you exactly? I'd feel kinda weird sleeping with you if you were wasted or some shit- 'cause I'm basically sober."

"Why you asking?" Gee asked, their words slurring together slightly.

Frank sat back up, "Because you seem pretty drunk."

Gee groaned and covered their face with their arm, "Why are you just now bringing this up?"

"Because I didn't really think about it until just now."

Gee moved their arm from their face and looked back at Frank, "Does it _really_ matter?"

"A little bit, yeah." Frank replied, scratching the back of his neck.

"Okay." Gee felt disappointed, but they understood. Well, mostly. There was a nagging voice at the back of their mind that kept saying "he stopped because he realized he doesn't want you." They tried to ignore it but it was persistent, making it's way to the core of their being. They sat up and looked away from Frank; they looked at the wall, the ceiling, the floor- anywhere but Frank. _It's just because you're drunk_ Gee thought repeatedly. But no matter how hard they tried, they couldn't convince themselves that this was true.

"Are you okay, Gee?" Frank asked, reaching his hand out hesitantly to touch their shoulder.

They shrugged, still not looking at him, "Yeah, I'm fine."

Frank scooted closer to them, his hand still on their shoulder, "You sure?"

Gee shrugged and Frank's hand slipped of their shoulder. Basically nothing had happened and yet their mood had suddenly changed from "actually feeling really good" to "literally complete shit." They wished they could just go home, but they were extremely drunk and their parents would ask why they had left the "sleepover" early. They also wished they could just curl up into a ball and cry, but then Frank would _really_ know something was wrong and they couldn't have that. They didn't want Frank to know the full extent of how fucked up they were- well, at least not yet. 

"It is just because you're drunk, you know." Frank said, interrupting Gee's thoughts. "I still want you like this, just... not right now, okay?"

"Okay..." Gee mumbled in reply. A voice in their head kept saying that he was lying, and they believed it. Why would Frank want them? They were gross, awkward, wrong in every way. They didn't blame Frank for not wanting them.

"Shit, Gee, are you crying?" Frank asked, sounding concerned. _Fuck_  Gee thought and quickly wiped their eyes. They didn't realize they had started crying until Frank had pointed it out. 

Gee started to panic now- they didn't want Frank to see them like this. They tried getting off of his bed, but accidentally fell onto his floor. Their mood was getting worse and worse and they didn't want to completely breakdown in front of Frank. They scrambled off his floor and were about to head towards the door when Frank grabbed their wrist, stopping them from leaving.

"Gee, just talk to me, please?" Gee was scared to look at Frank, but he tugged on their wrist and they couldn't help looking at him. "Please?" He repeated and they sat down on the bed again.

Gee shrugged and started tugging at the end of their dress. It was all bunched and wrinkled and they decided now was the perfect time to try to straighten it out. Frank put his hand on their shoulder and mumbled, "Gee?"

"I'm okay." They muttered in reply, still not looking at Frank.

"No you aren't."

"You don't know that!" Gee snapped, pulling away from Frank and standing up again.

He put his hands up defensively, then said, "Okay, but it's pretty fucking obvious that you _aren't_ okay. Gee, just tell me what's wrong!"

"I don't know what's wrong!" They yelled, suddenly getting the urge to throw something against a wall. They closed their eyes and tried to calm down, wrapping their arms around their body and swaying back and forth. This was stupid, _they_ were stupid. There was no reason to feel this angry. 

Frank stood up and slowly walked towards them, still holding his hands out as if Gee was going to do something. They weren't going to do anything to him, why would they? There was no reason. No fucking reason for them to feel like this. Frank got closer to them and they suddenly really need to be held. They pulled him closer and wrapped their arms around him tightly, burying their face into his neck and trying to hold back tears.

It didn't work. They were fucking sobbing into Frank's shirt, unable to stop once they had started. They didn't know what triggered this, but it's not like this sort of thing has never happened- usually they're just completely alone. No witnesses is better, though. Fuck, Frank would think they were such a _freak_. He would- fuck, he probably wouldn't want to be with them anymore. They were completely _fucked_ \- also, they still couldn't stop fucking _crying_ god fucking dammit.

Frank was saying something, but Gee couldn't make it out. They tried to focus on what he was saying, but there was this loud pounding in their ears and they couldn't hear a thing. He started tugging them back towards the bed and they went with him, still clinging to him. They both stumbled onto the bed and Gee started crying a little less. Frank was stroking their hair and, now that they were starting to calm down, they could make out what he was saying. 

"It's okay, Gee. It's okay, everything's fine." He was speaking softly, almost as if he didn't want to disturb Gee. They were starting to feel sick now. They weren't sure if it was because of the alcohol or because they just started sobbing in front of their boyfriend. Probably a mixture of the two.

They pulled away from Frank and wiped their eyes. Fuck, they were regretting coming to this party now. Why did they think this would be a good idea? 

"I... I have to go." Gee mumbled and tried getting off his bed again.

 "You can't, you're super drunk." Frank pointed out

"Fuck." They sat back down on Frank's bed and buried their face in their hands. They just wanted to curl up into a ball and sleep, but they were far too emotional for that. They just needed to calm down, maybe try talking about something soothing.

"Did you know I tried to kill myself once?" Gee said on accident, immediately regretting it once it slipped out of their mouth. Way to go for talking about something soothing, jackass.

Frank stiffened beside them and Gee could feel him looking at them. It was unnerving, so of course they just had to continue with this train of thought, "Tried choking myself to death. Didn't kill me, but it did unlock something kinky inside me."

Gee could practically feel Frank radiating discomfort and pity beside them, but now that they've started they couldn't stop. It was like years and years of pent up emotions were suddenly flowing out of them. 

"That actually wasn't the only time, I've tried many times. Of course, no one actually knows that, I've kept it well hidden. Usually it happens in the dead of night, that way no one could interrupt. Also, night time is always the worst for me. Maybe it's because everything is so quiet, no room for distractions. Although, sometimes I get so distracted by the smallest things at night that I can't sleep. Silence can sometimes be too loud, you know?"

Frank leaned his head on Gee's shoulder and said, "Yeah, I know."

"Very stressful, not being able to sleep because your mind just won't stop. Happens to much to me, you know? Everything is just too much sometimes, really wish it would stop."

Frank wrapped his arms around Gee and they leaned into him, resting their head on his head. 

"Anyway, the first time I tried to kill myself I was 11 or 12. Well, I didn't so much try to kill myself in so many words. I more was experimenting to see what would happen if I took a handful of ibuprofen- and I didn't really care if it caused death. Turns out you just pass out and wake up with a nasty headache. Not a fun experience for a child, let me tell you."

"Gee..." Frank started, but Gee interrupted him, saying, "Don't... don't say anything. I don't want your pity."

"It's not pity, Gee. More like sympathy- or maybe worry."

"I don't want you to worry, either. I'm fine now." Gee was lying from the bottom of their heart, but Frank didn't have to know that.

Except he pulled away from them slightly, so he could look at their face, and asked, "But are you _really_ fine?"

They looked down to avoid eye contact and replied with, "Of course I'm fine."

"I'm pretty sure getting drunk and crying on my bed doesn't count as fine, Gee."

"Uh, that's the definition of fine, babe." 

"Your definition of fine is wack, dude. But, I'll try not to worry- or at least I won't do it openly. I will do it on my insides where you can't see." Frank paused, then added, "If you wanna continue talking about this stuff you totally can. Like, talking about it is supposed to help, right?"

"I guess, I don't know. I've never really talked about this stuff before. Well, a little to Ray and Mikey, but I don't think even they know the full extent of it."

Frank moved back closer to them, wrapping his arms tighter around their waist, "Well, then maybe it's a good time to start?"

Gee smiled at him, "Yeah, maybe. It's just, I don't know, it's frustrating. Like, I'll have long periods where I'm incredibly depressed, to the point of barely being able to move without collapsing, but then it will just... stop? And I'll start thinking 'hey, maybe things are getting better!' but deep down I know that feeling is only temporary. All feelings are temporary, only certain feelings last longer than a month. I just... I don't know how I'm supposed to live like this, you know? It's a lot to deal with."

"I know, babe. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry, there's nothing you can do." 

"yeah, but it sucks knowing you're going through this shit. Also kinda sucks knowing I can do jack shit about it."

"You could always just try being there for me when shit gets real bad?" Gee suggested hesitantly.

Frank smiled up at them and replied, "Yeah, I think I can do that."

"Okay, good. Thanks, Frank."

"Yeah, of course."

Gee started feeling calmer now that they had gotten some stuff off their chest. But they still felt weird and itchy and uncomfortable, like something was wrong.

Something _was_ wrong, though. They told Frank things they had hidden from people they had been friends with their whole life. They told him things they swore themselves they'd never tell anyone, mostly because they felt ashamed of themselves for being so fucking pathetic. Who tries to end their life when they're still a goddamn child? Fucking _pathetic_.

"After that initial overdose, I decided that emotions were overrated and started burying everything I felt. All the emotions that people saw me experience were false, a mask put up to hide everything I actually was feeling. Pretty fucked up right? Well, let's just say burying your feelings never really ends well. Eventually those feelings will show their ugly faces and they'll be too powerful for you to suppress. Now it's uncontrollable, they come in intense waves of extreme cockiness and complete self-loathing- there's basically no inbetween." Gee's words were coming out of them like the emotions they were talking about- now that they started talking they couldn't stop.

"Anyway, there's also my problem with the dark. It's pretty embarrassing having to tell people that you're afraid of the dark, even though that isn't the full truth. I'm just more afraid of how people would react if I told them that sometimes it feels like the darkness is alive and trying to kill me- and no, I'm not saying that in a hypothetical way. For about 5 months it actually felt like the darkness was a living being, and I was so scared of this creature that I couldn't be in the dark without having a panic attack. It's not like that anymore, but I'm still afraid that it will come back to life. Can't sleep with the lights off anymore.

"And, of course, there was the time I felt like I was literally on fire. You know, people say that there is no way raising kids in an extremely Christian environment could fuck up their mental health, but you know what I say? I say fuck that. You wanna know why I felt like I was literally on fire, Frank?" They stopped talking to look Frank in the eye, waiting for him to say something.

"Uhm... why?" Frank asked hesitantly.

"I felt so guilty for being queer and having hypersexual tendencies- which, I can't control- that I thought God was giving me a warning sign. The warning? Showing me what _Hell_ feels like. It was so painful that I couldn't move, couldn't _scream_ , I just had to lay on my bed and endure feeling like I was on fire. But, of course Christianity could _never_ fuck up someone's mental health. There is literally _nothing_ wrong with how Christian parents raise their children."

"Oh god, Gee, I'm so-"

Gee raised their finger to Frank's mouth, stopping him from talking, "Don't say it, I don't wanna hear it. There's nothing anyone can do for me now. I'm fucked to my core, and honestly? I'm okay with that. I'm okay with the constant guilt, the constant self-loathing, the constant feeling that I am _wrong._ I'm okay with it because I'm used to it. I've felt this way for so long that it's just normal for me, and I don't need anyone else to help me or to give me pity."

Frank pushed Gee's finger away from his mouth, "Well that's just bullshit."

"What do you mean?" Gee asked, crossing their arms and narrowing their eyes at Frank

"What you just said, it's bullshit. You need people, Gee, whether you want to admit it or not. You can't just bottle this shit up all the time, because if you do something really bad could happen, you know? You have to tell at least _someone_."

"Something really bad _has_ happened, Frank! I've been trying to kill myself since I was a _child_. I've been fucked up for half of my goddamn life, I don't know how to be _fine_. I don't know how to react correctly in social situations, because I have been practically _isolated_ my whole life. I'm either too loud or too quiet, make too much eye contact or none at all. I'm going to college soon and I have no idea how I'm going to fucking survive! There is no hope for me, Frank."

"There is hope for you though! Like, fuck, yes you've been fucked up for half of your life, but that's half of your _current_  age. If you start trying to get better, or at least start talking about this more, then it won't be half of your life in 5 years, in 10. Yes, things will still be shitty, but at least you will start being able to deal with it better. There's a reason why therapy works for some people, Gee, you have to tell someone about this shit."

"Well I'm telling you about it right now!"

"I know and that's _good_. I'm glad you're talking to me about it, so now I can try to help you."

"I don't need your fucking help!" Gee yelled and got off Frank's bed again. They were headed towards the door, but suddenly they felt woozy and they threw up all over Frank's floor. They collapsed to their knees after that and started to sob again, burying their face in their hands. They felt Frank sitting down next to them, but they didn't look up at him. They felt vulnerable and disgusting and they just wanted to sleep.

\----------

"Gee? Gee, you awake?" Mikey's voice was faint, but Gee was starting to be able to understand what he was saying. Their body was fucking sore, and when they opened their eyes they realized that they were lying on the floor. Gee groaned and sat up slowly, still keeping their eyes shut. God, they felt terrible. They hadn't felt this bad since- 

Their eyes shot open and were greeted by Mikey, Pete, and Frank looking at them worriedly. Glimpses of things they had said the night before filtered into their mind and they purposely didn't look at Frank. 

"My head hurts." Gee said, their voice cracking slightly because their throat was dry.

"You kinda drank a lot last night. Like, a _lot_." Mikey replied.

"Oh." They quickly glanced at Frank, before looking back at Mikey, "Yeah."

"Yeah." 

"Why am I on the floor?" Gee asked.

"You kinda passed out on the floor and whenever we tried to move you to my bed you would vaguely wake up and start kicking and hitting us." Frank replied.

"Oh, huh." Well, that explained that. It didn't explain why everything smelled awful, though.

"You also kinda threw up everywhere." Mikey added.

Well, that explained the smell, probably. Fuck, they threw up on Frank's floor. _Fuck_. 

"This might be a bad time to mention this, but uh, we kinda have to go to church or else both of our parents will get really pissed." Pete reminded them all.

"Oh, fuck me." Gee groaned again and slumped back down on the ground. They couldn't remember everything they said to Frank last night, but they remembered enough to be freaking out. Shit, why couldn't they remember anything _he_ had said? That just didn't seem fair.

"Can you guys just not go?" Frank asked.

Pete patted Frank's shoulder and shook his head, "Hon, it doesn't really work like that."

Gee made a noise of displeasure and sat up again, "Fuck, what am I gonna wear? I'm pretty sure I will get burned at the stake if I got to church wearing this."

"This is why you should always bring your younger brother with you everywhere, Gee. I brought you another pair of clothes, because I remembered that Sunday comes after Saturday, ya big dummy." Mikey threw a shirt and pair of jeans at Gee and they felt incredibly grateful that they didn't both have memory issues.

"Oh, thank God." Gee reached around and started unzipping their dress, before realizing that the others were still in the room. They hesitated and gave Mikey a look that said, _Go away, I'm changing._ Mikey nodded in understanding and got up, pulling Pete with him. Frank tried smiling at Gee, but they still weren't looking at him. He looked slightly hurt, but got up and left the room anyway. Fuck, they just wished they could remember everything from the night before.

Gee got off the floor and started getting dressed into the clothes Mikey had brought. They still smelled vile, but they didn't have enough energy to care about that. They left Frank's room and went to the bathroom. They were scared of how bad they looked, but they also weren't sure if they really cared.

Gee looked like complete shit which, okay, wasn't surprising. They _felt_ like complete shit, so not surprising that they looked that way too. Their makeup was smudged around their eyes in a way that matched a certain pest that is known for eating garbage. They grabbed a washcloth and started scrubbing at their eyes, attempting to wash off at least most of the makeup. They eventually got most of it off, then sighed and left the bathroom. 

Time to face the world.

\----------

The ride to church was complete hell. Gee's head felt like it was exploding and their vision was fuzzy, but they were the only one with a license so they had to drive. Pete asked Frank why he didn't have a license yet, but he just shrugged and said, "Kept failing the test, parents eventually gave up trying."

So, Gee was stuck driving everyone to church. The four of them arrived about 15 minutes early looking- and smelling, in Gee's case- like death. Gee just hoped their parents wouldn't ask questions, they were too tired to come up with a lie. 

Gee thanked the high heavens when they saw Ray. He was exactly the person they wanted to talk to about this whole disaster- Mikey would just call them an idiot and tell them to talk to Frank. Ray would probably be more understanding.

"Gee, you're being an idiot." Was the first thing Ray said after Gee came up to him and told him everything they could remember from the previous night.

"What? _Why_?" 

"He probably doesn't care! Like, okay, look at him." Ray turned Gee's face so they were looking in Frank's direction, and he was looking right back at them.

They struggled out of Ray's hold and said, "What the hell, dude?"

"He's been staring at you for the past 5 minutes! He's probably freaking out because you aren't talking to him or even _looking_ at him. Just like, go talk to him. Apologize for throwing up on his floor or something, I don't know. But for God's sake, don't _ignore_ him."

"You don't know the things I told him, Ray! I told him like," Gee waved their hand around randomly, " _Everything_."

"Considering how hurt he looks that you are ignoring him, he probably doesn't care that you told him a bunch of shit!"

"But-"

"No but's! Talk to him, Gee. It doesn't even have to be right now, if you don't wanna talk about it in the middle of church. Just, don't continue to ignore him, that will just freak him out more."

"He's probably already freaking out." Gee mumbled.

"Well, how did he react last night when you told him it all?" Ray asked.

Gee shrugged and scratched the back of their neck, "I can't remember?"

"Oh my god, of course you can't. Well, then I guess you don't know if he's freaking out or not."

"But the things I _said_ , Ray!"

"I don't care what you said! Just stop being an idiot, Gee."

Gee rolled their eyes, "Yeah, whatever."

Ray and Gee had to stop talking because the service was about to start, but Ray quietly said, "Fucking talk to him, Gee."

Ray was probably right, they were just scared. They didn't want Frank to think they were a total freak, but he probably did after what they had said. They don't even remember everything they said, but they remembered enough. Remembered enough to know that he couldn't be completely chill about it all. At best he now was pitying them, which they didn't want. They didn't want him to only continue being with them because he was afraid they'd kill themselves or something.

Once the service ended, Gee immediately left- not giving Frank any time to talk to them. They didn't want to deal with that now. They didn't want to deal with it _ever_. They just wanted to go home and sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry :-) (no i'm not (*flickering lights on and off* WELCOME TO HELL! WELCOME TO HELL! WELCOME TO))
> 
> reminder to hmu on [tumblr](http://transboykobrakid.tumblr.com/) and/or [twitter](https://twitter.com/Allegrcat) B))
> 
> also feel free to leave kudos/comments! :0


	16. Genesis 19:7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pete looked down at his plate and picked up a half eaten pizza crust, then ripped a small chunk off and handed it to Mikey, saying, "Jesus took some bread and broke it, then gave it to his disciples and said, 'take, eat; this is my body.'"
> 
> "Pete, what are you doing?" Jon asked with an exasperated sigh.
> 
> "I'm doing communion." Pete replied with a grin.
> 
> "I feel like what you're doing is extremely disrespectful." 
> 
> "Says the guy who completely forgot about communion." Pete said, his grin growing bigger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> does anyone actually read the bible verses that i put as the chapter names

Mikey was sick of Gee's bullshit. They had been droopy and moody for the past week and he was sick of it. They didn't even stay at drama practise, they just dropped him off and then left. They loved drama, and if this Frank bullshit was making them not do stuff they loved then goddammit Mikey was on the verge of forcing Frank and Gee to talk.

He didn't want to think about it tonight, though. Mikey had had enough and just wanted to stop thinking about Gee's problems. 

Tonight was his small groups beginning of summer pizza social and Mikey just wanted to think about that. He was a little scared to go because Tyler would be there, but he knew that Jon wouldn't let anything happen so he wasn't too afraid. Of course, if Mikey and Pete had to deal with some glares or weird looks from Tyler then, well, they could deal.

At leas Josh and Nate were cool. Josh was literally dating a bi girl, so it'd be pretty hypocritical if he was shitty to Mikey and Pete about it. Nate, on the other hand, just didn't seem to care.

Mikey got Gee to drive him to Jon's house as a way to get them out of the house. He tried convincing them to talk to Frank again, but Gee was a stubborn bastard so it was no use.

They got to Jon's house and Mikey waved Gee off, then ran inside. Jon opened the door for Mikey and he was greeted by Jon's dog jumping up on him. He grinned and dropped to the floor, letting the dog lick his entire face. Jon laughed as he watched Mikey get covered in slobber and said, "Y'know, most people push him away by this point."

Mikey looked up at Jon and ducked as the dog tried to shove its tongue into his mouth, "How could I push him away? He's so cute!"

"That's basically exactly what Pete said."

"Pete said what?" Pete said as he walked into the foyer.

"Pete said that he would gladly be killed by a dog if it was cute enough." Mikey replied.

"That is true. But disclaimer: every dog is cute enough." Pete sat down next to Mikey and started scratching behind the dog's ear, saying, "What a good boy! Who's a good boy? You're a good boy!"

Mikey fake pouted, "Why don't you talk to me like that?"

"Because you're not a dog, idiot."

"What are you two doing?" Tyler asked, leaning against the doorway separating the living room and the foyer, his arms crossed and an accusatory look on his face.

“We are sitting on our youth leaders floor and cuddling a dog.” Pete replied, “Chill out, Tyler. You’re acting like we’re making out or something.”

“Okay, that’s enough, boys. Tyler, Pete and Mikey are allowed to be in the same room as each other, don’t make it a big deal. Pete, don’t try to start anything with Tyler. That’s just as bad.” Jon said in a stern tone. Tyler rolled his eyes and went back into the living room. Mikey had to stop himself from laughing at Jon shutting Tyler down- he didn't want to push anything.

Mikey got up and brushed some of the fur off his clothes, then made his way to the living room where Nate and Tyler were sitting. He thought it was a little strange that Josh wasn't there already- Tyler and Josh usually came to this sort of thing together- but he didn't put too much thought into it.

He sat on the couch next to Nate and smiled at Pete as he walked into the room. He really did look good with the pink hair, but, to be fair, he probably would look good with any hair color or style. He just is very attractive.

Mikey was just _really_ into Pete.

Pete came over and sat beside Mikey, using the fact that the couch was full to sit closer than necessary. Jon came in a minute later and said, "Okay, Josh said he was on his way so I went ahead and ordered the pizza. It should be here in thirty to forty minutes, so for now I just have some chips and ice cream in the kitchen."

"What sort of ice cream?" Nate asked.

"Neapolitan." Jon replied.

Nate clicked his tongue and mumbled, "At least it isn't only vanilla."

"I also got toppings?" Jon added.

"What sort of toppings?"

"Chocolate and caramel syrup."

"Jon, let me pick the snacks next time."

"Since when have you been so particular about your ice cream toppings?"

The doorbell rang before Nate could reply and Jon left the room to answer it. He came back a minute later followed by Josh, who's hair was now bright red. Pete grinned as Josh walked in and pointed at Josh's hair, yelling, "Hair dye buddies!!!"

Josh grinned back and replied, "Hell yeah!! I couldn't let you steal my thunder, I had to mix things up a little."

"So you picked red? That's such a normal color, dude. You should've gone with some cooler like purple or yellow or something."

"Okay but I've already had purple, dude. Plus red is a sick color, don't shame the flame."

" _Please_ tell me you did not just say that."

Josh's grin widened, "I did just say that, actually."

"Oh my god."

"I think the red looks great, Josh." Mikey said.

"Thank you, Mikey. At least _someone_ is appreciating it."

"Hey! I like it, I just said that red is such a normal color." Pete said.

"I think it looks cool, too." Nate added.

 "Well thank you, Nate, and by the way guys," Josh said to Mikey and Pete, "I'm really glad you guys are able to hang out again. You guys have been friends for so long that it really sucked when you weren't really allowed to be."

Mikey smiled at Josh, "Yeah, me too. It totally sucked when we couldn't."

Tyler snorted, "Like you guys ever stopped hanging out."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Pete asked, narrowing his eyes at Tyler.

"Nothing." Tyler got up and added, "Jon, you mentioned having chips in the kitchen?"

"Oh! Yeah, do you want me to go get them?" Jon replied.

"No, I can get them. Thanks, though." Tyler walked out of the room and Mikey tried ignoring the dirty look that he shot Pete as he left. Tyler could fucking deal with Mikey and Pete still being together if Mikey had to deal with his homophobia. 

Okay, maybe the dirty look was justifiable. Pete was subtly- not so subtly- running his hand up and down Mikey's thigh. He wasn't even looking at Mikey, he was in a conversation with Josh about hair dye and the annoyance of having to bleach your hair so much. Mikey always wondered what he'd look like with dyed hair, and so he voiced this thought to Josh and Pete then.

"I don't know, you'd either look _really_ sick or _really_ dumb." Josh replied.

"I think he'd look good- people always look good with dyed hair." Pete said.

"It depends on the color." Nate added, interrupting his conversation with Jon.

"What color would you do?" Josh asked.

Mikey shrugged, "I don't know, I hadn't thought about it that much."

"He'd look good with blue hair, maybe. Or like, green." Josh said, looking at Mikey intently.

"Who would?" Tyler asked, walking in while holding multiple large bags of chips.

"Mikey." Pete replied, then added, "What hair color do you think Mikey would look good with?"

Tyler shrugged and put the chips down on the coffee table, "Don't know, he can do whatever he wants."

"Yeah, but like, what color do you think would look best on him? We're now taking an unofficial poll. I say blue." Josh said.

"I don't know, maybe pink- then he could match his _boyfriend_." The way Tyler said "boyfriend" was full of venom and Pete stilled his hand on Mikey's thigh and glared daggers at Tyler.

"You got something to say, Tyler?" Pete asked, looking ready to fight Tyler.

"Okay, okay, maybe it wasn't such a good idea to keep you two near each other. No _fighting_ , okay? And that includes no glaring or making jabs at each other. You can be mature and civilized around each other for a few hours, right boys?" Jon had stood up and was standing in between Tyler and Pete, his stance as if he was ready to pull a fight apart. Pete glared at Tyler a second more, before deflating and turning his attention away from Tyler.

Nothing very eventful happened for a while after that, and next thing Mikey knew Jon was standing up to get the pizza from the door. He came back holding two boxes of pizza and a large bottle of Coke, saying, "Pizza's here guys!" He put the boxes down on the coffee table and then left to grab some cups from the kitchen. 

 Josh was now sitting on the couch beside Mikey and he was going on about the concert he had just gone to with Ashley.

"It was awesome, I totally started crying during some of the songs." He said, looking off with a distant, longing look in his eyes. 

"I'm so jealous, dude. I haven't been to a concert in forever." Pete said, then turned to Mikey and added, "We should see if there are gonna be any shows near here soon. I feel like I'm dying, I need concerts to survive."

Mikey grinned, "We totally should! It's also been too long for me- like, almost a year since the last show I've been to."

"You guys are lucky," Nate said, "I've never been to any concerts. I always hear people talk about how great they are, but I've never had a chance to go to one."

"Oh man seriously? Dude, we gotta take you to a concert sometime. Even if it's just a small one, you need to experience the joys of a concert. Hell, sometimes smaller shows are better than big ones. Shows with assigned seating make me uncomfortable. Like, no one ever gets into it enough at shows with seating, so it's a major bummer. I gotta _be_ in the crowd y'know? Gotta feel bodies pressed close and have the music flow to my very core."

"It's always the best when there's really strong drums, then you can feel it to your bones and it almost feels like you're either gonna explode or cum." Mikey added.

"Or you actually cum." Pete said with a wink.

Jon sighed and rolled his eyes, "Guys, Philippians 4:8."

"Sorry, Jon." Mikey and Pete said in unison. Pete then turned to Nate and continued, "But seriously, I gotta take you to a show sometime. This is one experience I won't allow you to miss out on."

Nate grinned at Pete, "Awesome! I've wanted to for a long time but things just kept getting in the way. Mostly all the shows I've wanted to go to were 'too far away' according to my parents. Apparently they don't wanna drive an hour to drop me off at some shady club for a few hours."

Pete laughed, "An hour isn't even that long; I once drove 5 hours for a show."

"I once drove 12 hours for a show and stayed in the city for like, a week. Get on my level, bitches." Mikey grinned widely and wiggled his eyebrows.

"Wow, how did you do that?" Nate asked, looking at Mikey in awe.

"Gee drove me and the- he also really liked the band. Also we knew people in the area and we just stayed with them." Mikey replied.

"That's so cool. You guys need to bring me to a show sometime, my parents probably wouldn't care if someone else drove me."

Pete grinned, "Yeah, I'd love to do that! Although just a warning: I often get separated from people at shows because I kinda lose track of what I'm doing."

"One time he accidentally punched a guy in the face. I mean, he apologized but it still happened." Mikey said with a laugh.

"The guy was super drunk, he didn't care! He just started laughing. And then he spilled his drink all over me."

Mikey giggled, "He smelled like beer for like a week after that."

"That's just because I'm gross and never shower."

"Okay, that's true."

"I like constantly smell terrible. I mean it, smell me right now." Pete grinned and leaned closer to Mikey, holding his shirt up for Mikey to smell. Mikey laughed and tried pushing him away, but Pete was persistent in his attempts to prove how gross he smelled. He turned towards Jon and held his shirt out to him, saying, "Jon, smell my shirt."

"I'm not gonna smell your shirt, Pete."

" _Please_ , smell my shirt Jon. I promise it will be fun for you."

"Pete, in what way would that be fun for me?"

"In literally every way."

"You have a skewed definition of fun, Pete."

Pete grinned widely, "I know!"

Josh readjusted on the couch so his legs were stretched across Mikey and Pete and said, "Pete, wash your clothes."

"Nah, I'm fine as is." 

"You're disgusting."

"I know." Pete replied with a wink.

Mikey giggled and batted at Josh's legs, saying, "Dude, get off of me."

Josh grinned at Mikey and replied, "Nope! I'm quite comfortable where I am."

Mikey laughed and shoved Josh's legs off of him, then glanced at Tyler and noticed him glaring at him and Josh. Apparently he didn't want the fag hanging out with his best friend, well boo hoo for him. It's not like he didn't make it next to impossible for Mikey to hang out with _his_ best friend. 

"Wait, Jon, aren't we supposed to take communion today?" Nate asked, counting out the weeks on his fingers. 

Jon groaned, "Oh, crap, you're totally right. I completely forgot about communion."

Pete gasped dramatically, "Jon, how dare you!"

"It's not my fault! It just slipped my mind!"

"Terrible, you should be ashamed of yourself, Jon." Mikey said, trying to keep a serious expression on his face.

"So are we just... not gonna do it?" Tyler asked.

"No, we should still do it, I'm just not sure what with..." Jon replied, then looked down in thought, trying to figure out how to do communion with the things he had in his house.

Pete looked down at his plate and picked up a half eaten pizza crust, then ripped a small chunk off and handed it to Mikey, saying, "Jesus took some bread and broke it, then gave it to his disciples and said, 'take, eat; this is my body.'"

"Pete, what are you doing?" Jon asked with an exasperated sigh.

"I'm doing communion." Pete replied with a grin.

"I feel like what you're doing is extremely disrespectful." 

"Says the guy who completely forgot about communion." Pete said, his grin growing bigger.

Jon rolled his eyes, "Fine, whatever. You can continue, but I still think this is disrespectful."

"Disrespectful is my middle name, Jonny boy." Pete said, then continued passing the ripped up pizza crust around the room. Once everyone had taken a piece and eaten, Pete picked up a cup and filled it with soda, saying, "And when he had taken a cup and given thanks, he gave it to them saying, 'drink from it, all of you; for this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for forgiveness of sins.'" 

"At least he's basically getting the passage right." Jon mumbled before drinking from the cup of soda. 

Pete grinned at Jon from where he was standing, "How'd I do?"

"Great, you should do it for the whole church sometime." Jon replied sarcastically.

Pete wiped a fake tear from his eye, "I feel so loved." 

"You should." Mikey said, then blushed slightly. Pete smiled at him, then joined him back on the couch. 

The rest of the night went by uneventfully. Mikey ignored Tyler's glares and just focused on Pete and Josh for most of the time. They played some games and learned that Nate had a pretty gruesome sense of humor, something Pete wouldn't forget now that he knew. 

When it was time for everyone to leave, Josh stood up and asked, "Yo, does anyone wanna go to McDonalds or something and just chill? I don't have to go home yet and kinda wanna continue hanging out."

Mikey got up too and stretched, then replied, "Yeah I can go with you, I have nothing better to do. I'll just have to text Gee about where I'm going."

"Cool! Anyone else wanna come?"

"Sorry, I can't. I have to be home before 10." Nate replied with a shrug.

"I can go too, if you'll accept my company." Pete stood next to Mikey and leaned his arm on Mikey's shoulder. Josh turned towards Tyler and raised his eyebrows questioningly, but Tyler rolled his eyes and said, "Can't go, sorry. Have fun with the fags."

Pete grinned widely and said, "Oh we'll have fun alright." 

Jon crossed his arms and looked at Tyler and Pete sternly, saying, "Boys..."

Pete put his hands up defensively, "What? I said nothing!"

"You were trying to start something."

"He was the one who insulted me and Mikey, why aren't you getting on him?"

Jon sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, "I know, he can't do that, but you also shouldn't try to push his anger. Turn the other cheek and whatnot."

Pete rolled his eyes, "Yeah, yeah, I know. Anyway, Josh, you wanna go?"

Josh looked at Tyler, almost as if he was trying to convince his friend to _not_ be a dick with lots of strong eye contact, then sighed and said, "Yeah, we can go."

Mikey and Pete followed Josh out to his car. When they got in the car, Josh sighed and said, "I'm sorry about Tyler."

Mikey shrugged, "It's okay at least he's probably already done the worst that he can do. Now I just ignore him."

"Also, he isn't exactly creative with his insults. Like c'mon, 'fag'? Like I haven't heard that a hundred times before."

Mikey turned so he was facing Pete- who was sitting in the backseat- and said, "Pete, you just realized you were bi last year."

"Yes, but everyone else seemed to know way before I did. Everyone used to think Patrick and I were a thing, dude."

Mikey laughed, "Okay, that's true."

"But seriously, even if you guys have heard this sort of thing before, I'm still sorry. Tyler's a total dick sometimes." Josh said, glancing over at Mikey.

"Yeah, but seriously, it's fine. We can deal with it. Plus, we don't even see Tyler all that much, y'know? It's easy to ignore him." Mikey said, brushing Josh off. The truth was that it did suck having Tyler glaring and insulting Mikey and Pete every chance that he got, but there wasn't much Mikey could do about it. Ignoring Tyler was just the easiest option, because if Mikey actually tried to call him out on his homophobic bullshit, _Mikey_ would be the one who got in trouble. It was fucked up, but Mikey couldn't exactly do anything about it.

They got to McDonalds after a few minutes, the topic of Tyler being dropped. None of them were really hungry, so they just got drinks and fries then sat down in the back of the place. They were the only people in there besides the workers, and Mikey felt like he almost shouldn't be there. It's not like it was about to close or anything, he just felt weird being there.

"So," Pete started, but interrupted himself by eating a fry. He swallowed, then continued, asking, "So, Josh, how are things with you and Ashley?"

Josh shrugged and replied, "We broke up. Well, not in a bad way, we just both realized that there wasn't any point in dating since nothing changed really y'know? It was just a title basically, so we decided to call it off. I don't mind though, we're still really good friends."

"Ah, that makes sense. She did seem cool, though. Can't believe you brought her to the House of Heroes concert and not me, though."

Josh laughed and rolled his eyes, "Sorry, Pete. I'll bring you next time, deal?"

Pete grinned, "Deal. They just need to tour near us again."

"Even if they don't tour near here again we should just make it a road trip sort of thing. Like, we all get into Josh's car and drive to the closest show, even if it is like a 20 hour drive." Mikey suggested.

"Dude, that'd be sick! We can also bring Nate, since he's never been to a concert before." Pete added.

 "Yeah, but would his actually parents allow him to come on a road trip with us? Probably not." Josh pointed out.

"Hmm that's true... We can smuggle him out of his house, his parents won't suspect a thing." 

"Pete, I'm pretty sure that would not be possible. We're all too clumsy and loud to be able to get away with sneaking around like that." Mikey said with a laugh.

 "Okay, maybe..." Pete mumbled. He had started holding Mikey's hand under the table and Mikey smiled to himself. He liked the small touches between him and Pete, and he missed them a lot. Any sort of touching between the two had basically come to a halt ever since Tyler had outed them to everyone- even the platonic touching that they had done before they were dating. Mikey was just glad that Josh wasn't a homophobic asshole like Tyler.

"What about you two?" Josh asked, then, when realising Mikey and Pete looked very confused, added, "I mean, how are things with you two? Relationship-wise. Probably should've specified what I meant."

"Oh! Things are good. Well, as good as they can be. Pete is current holding my hand at this very moment." Mikey replied, then lifted his hand so Josh could see that yes, Pete was in fact holding his hand.

Josh laughed, "That's good. You guys are like, such a power couple. You had to go through tough shit but you're still going strong."

"It's because we had like, 16 years of being best friends before the transition into 'boyfriends.'" Pete said.

"Yeah exactly, that's why Tyler being a dick- full offense- didn't really stop anything. It just pissed us off mostly." Mikey added with a laugh.

"I actually got a lot gayer ever since then, y'know?" Pete grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at Mikey.

"It's true, we're now fully fledged gays."

"Turned my papers in and everything!"

"I thought you both were bi...?" Josh asked, looking confused.

Mikey laughed, "We are, we just call ourselves gay because it's easier sometimes."

"Oh, yeah. That makes sense." Josh suddenly got quiet and started biting his lip nervously. Mikey looked at him questioningly, but Josh avoided eye contact. 

After a minute or two of Josh looking extremely nervous and almost uncomfortable, Mikey finally asked, "Dude, what's wrong?"

"Nothing is uh, nothing's wrong." Josh mumbled in response.

Pete rolled his eyes, "Just say what's wrong, dude, we won't care."

Mikey suddenly had a sinking feeling in his stomach, a feeling that said _fuck, what if he does care that we're so openly queer in front of him? What if he's just as bad as Tyler, but is just better at hiding it?_

"I think I might also be bi." Josh blurted out, then quickly looked down, thoroughly examining his thighs. Mikey almost started laughing from relief. That was the exact opposite of what he had been expecting.

"Dude, really?" Pete asked, sounding surprised.

"Uhm, yeah? Like, I sorta just realized this. Well, it started because I was talking to Ashley after the House of Heroes concert and like, well... Okay basically I have to blame Colin Rigsby for this realization." Josh explained, then started to laugh. He rested his head on the table and said, "Fuck, when did we all get so _gay_?"

"I blame puberty." Mikey said solemnly.

"Because that's when you fully started to develop sexual and romantic feelings for people?" Pete asked.

"Nah, everyone just started getting a lot hotter." Mikey replied with a grin, then winked at Josh. Josh turned crimson and started mumbling quietly about Mikey being a "fucking flaterer" and how he should "really shut up, goddammit." Mikey thought it was adorable.

Josh overall was really adorable.

They stayed there talking for a while, until they all collectively realized that it was probably time for them to go home. It was getting late, and the McDonalds was probably going to close soon. They all got up and left, still talking and laughing all the way home. 

Josh dropped Mikey off first because his house was closer and Mikey waved Pete and Josh off, before going inside. It had been a good night, he had really enjoyed himself. Josh coming out as bi was a shock, but it was pretty cool. He liked having a little group of queer friends, even though all were from church. It almost made it better that he knew them all from church, because that meant they all were able to share the experience of dealing with Christianity and homophobia. A shitty experience, but still a shared experience. Having other people share your shitty experiences always makes it easier.

Mikey went into Gee's room where his sibling seemed to be sulking in the dark. He turned on the lights suddenly and yelled, "Gee, wake the fuck up."

Gee groaned and sat up, removing the covers from over their head and mumbling, "The fuck, dude?"

"I'm in a good mood and your sulking ass is annoying me."

"You don't know that i was sulking! What if I was just sleeping, _hm_?"

"You've been sulking ever since Frank's party, asshole, and it's getting annoying. For the love of god, just _talk to Frank_. I don't care what you think he thinks about you, he's probably been worried sick- especially since the last time he saw you you were blackout drunk and puking all over his floor. You ignoring him will only make the situation worse, so stop being a little bitch and _talk to him_." 

Gee was gaping at Mikey in shock, looking like someone just slapped them across the face. Hard. Mikey crossed his arms and stared Gee down, just asking for them to try to argue with what he just said. Finally, Gee sighed and laid back down, saying, "What if he thinks I'm a total freak, Mikey?"

"Then he's extremely oblivious if it took him this hard to figure that out." Mikey replied, then continued, "You _are_ a freak, Gee. But... but not in a bad way. Yeah you're weird and a little messed up, but that's just what makes you _you_. He probably at least somewhat knew what he was getting into when he first kissed you, and okay yeah now he knows some more specifics, but that shouldn't change anything. Just.... just talk to him, okay? He's probably really worried about you."

Gee rolled over so they were looking directly at Mikey and said, "Okay, you're probably right. I'll talk to him."

"Are you just saying that to make me go away, or are you actually gonna talk to him?" 

Gee rolled their eyes, "I'm actually gonna talk to him."

"Good! Glad I could help. I'm gonna go to my room and sext my boyfriend now, I hope you too can finally start sexting your boyfriend again instead of being a whiny asshole."

Gee scrunched their face up in disgust, "Ew, shut up and leave my room. You're being gross. Shoo, shoo."

Mikey laughed, "I was gonna leave anyway, asshole."

"You're still being gross."

Mikey grinned, "I know."

He turned to leave Gee's room, but stopped and looked back at Gee, saying, "Promise to talk to Frank?"

Gee sighed again, "Yeah, I promise."

"Good, because I have his number and I'll ask him if you've talked to him any time recently if you take too long."

"Ugh, fine I get it. Now please, let me sleep."

"Yeah, yeah, I will. Fuckin' old man. It's like, 8."

"It's like 11, asshole." Gee threw a pillow at Mikey, making him laugh and finally leave the room. He turned the light off and closed the door, then headed towards his room. He actually felt really good, and he fell asleep that night feeling content for the first time in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I'm gonna be going to San Francisco to be gay w my bf tomorrow and I'll be there for 2 weeks (i'm coming back on the 21st) and idk if I'll be able to write when I'm gone so it probably will be a while until i update after this chapter! sorry guys!!!
> 
> again, feel free to comment/leave kudos bc they fuel me and hmu on [tumblr](http://transboykobrakid.tumblr.com/) and/or [twitter](https://twitter.com/Allegrcat) ily guys


	17. Leviticus 20:13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gee just quickly sent Frank a text asking to hang out and then tried to ignore their phone as much as they physically could which... wasn't very much. They were desperate to see what he said.
> 
> Frank replied quickly and, to Gee's excitement, he did _not_ seem to totally hate them. Score.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yoo sorry this took me..... so long to post agh i was in san francisco a lot longer then i realized i would be (i was there for a month instead of 2 weeks) but here i am now!!! i hope yall havent forgotten about me
> 
> also how many of u would be interested in reading a bandom/project runway fic? i have ideas but i wanna know if ppl would actually read it....

Gee knew deep down that Mikey was right about the whole "talk to Frank" thing, but they still weren't sure they wanted to talk to him. It was scary, opening up to people, and Gee wasn't sure they were quite ready to tell Frank some of the things they told him yet. They hadn't even told _Mikey_ some of the things they had told Frank, so really they had every right to freak out.

They did end up texting Frank, though. They knew it was the best course of action, it was just scary to actually go through with. Gee just quickly sent Frank a text asking to hang out and then tried to ignore their phone as much as they physically could which... wasn't very much. They were desperate to see what he said.

Frank replied quickly and, to Gee's excitement, he did _not_ seem to totally hate them. Score. Now, they just had to work up the courage to actually respond to what he had said, which was him just telling them to come over to his house. They decided that texting was too scary, so the best thing to do was just to get in the car and drive to his house. Not the best plan, but they were never the best at doing things- especially social related things.

Gee started to rethink their decision to just show up at Frank's house when they stood at his front door. They could just go back into their car and drive off- Frank wouldn't have to know that they drove here in the first place. But, it was too late. They heard footsteps approaching the door- even though they hadn't even knocked- so they couldn't leave now. Frank opened the door and Gee suddenly felt sick with worry.

"Gee." Frank said softly, sounding surprised.

"I uhm- I didn't know how to respond, so I thought this was the best thing to do." Gee replied, then added, "I'm starting to think this wasn't such a good idea, though."

"No! I mean- I wanted you over anyway, so this is fine. Plus, to be honest, after you didn't reply for a bit I guessed that you were coming over here."

"Seriously?" Gee asked, now the one sounding surprised.

"Yeah, you're sorta predictable, Gee." Frank laughed.

Gee rubbed the back of their neck nervously, "Yeah, I guess so. So, uhm... can I come in?"

Frank rolled his eyes, "Yeah, of course you can come in. Obviously. I just, uh, yeah I don't know. Come in."

Gee felt extremely uncomfortable walking with Frank towards his room. It felt like the first time they ever came here- Gee following Frank and feeling incredibly out of place. They had gotten used to his house, but it was feeling uncomfortable again and now they'd probably have to get used to it all over again. It didn't help that Frank had been acting vaguely weird, and now Gee was thinking of every possibility of how he could be feeling. Maybe he invited Gee over because he didn't want to break up with them over the phone, or he thought it would just be easier this way. Maybe he was gonna mock them, or ask questions that Gee wouldn't want to answer (but would answer anyway because they wouldn't know how to _not_ answer.)

The very short walk between the front door and Frank's bedroom was one of the most stressful experiences of Gee's life. It didn't help that Frank also seemed uncomfortable, that just made Gee worry more.

When the two of them got to Frank's room, Gee instinctively sat down on Frank's bed. Frank looked slightly surprised at this, though, and Gee wondered if they had done something wrong by sitting on his bed. Did he want them to sit on the floor? They could sit on the floor, if that's what Frank wanted. They were about to move down onto the ground when Frank asked, "What are you doing?"

Gee felt guilty, like they had been caught red handed, and replied, "I- uh... I'm sitting on the floor." 

"I can see that, but why are you sitting on the floor?" Frank was looking at them curiously and Gee wondered why their heart was beating so quickly because of something so stupid.

"I... I wasn't sure if you wanted me to sit on your bed."

Frank leaned down and pulled Gee up, saying, "Of course I want you to sit on my bed. It'd be weird if I made you sit on my floor."

"Okay..." Gee hesitantly sat on the bed next to Frank, but put enough space between the two so it wouldn't be weird. They still didn't know what Frank was gonna say, so they were just preparing for the worst. They practically were sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting to make a quick getaway. They started tugging on their hair and stared at the floor nervously, refusing to look at Frank.

"So Gee-" Gee's heart started beating wildly at Frank talking, panic filling their mind with irrational thoughts and fears. Frank stopped talking and looked at them with concern, reaching his hand out to rest it on their knee.

"Are you okay, Gee? You look like you're gonna throw up. Or cry. Or maybe both." Frank said, moving closer to Gee on the bed.

"I'm- yeah. I'm fine. What were you uh- what were you gonna say?" Gee gave Frank a small smile, hoping it actually looked like a smile and not a grimace. Smiling was tough sometimes.

"I was just gonna say, uhm, that I wanted to talk about what happened. Y'know, uh, at the party?" Frank seemed to be talking slowly, like he wanted to be gentle. It pissed Gee off.

Gee crossed their arms and looked directly at Frank, trying not to waver on the outside, "Just say what you want to say, I don't care." 

"I wanted to say that like... I don't care? I guess, uhm, yeah. Like, you said a lot of things, and I know you don't talk about those things a lot so I get why you freaked out, but I don't mind. I... I don't know if you remembered what I said that night, but I meant it all."

Gee's expression got softer and they started pulling at their hair again, "What... what did you say? I can't remember anything from that night. Well, I remember bits and pieces, but mainly just stuff I said."

Frank inched a bit closer to Gee again and reached out to hold their hand. They smiled at him softly and he replied, "I said that you could talk to me anytime you needed, because yeah, okay, I might not be the best person to talk to about some things, but I'll be willing to listen to whatever you have to say. Even if I have no idea how to comfort you or make things right, I'll still always be here for you, Gee."

"But you don't.... you don't know what I'm like when I'm really bad. I'm not easy to deal with, Frankie, Hell, I didn't talk to you for a few weeks because of something small and stupid like this, and I'm not even that bad at the moment. Could you deal with me not talking to you for a month? How about 6 months? Yeah you might think you'll stay with me no matter what, but don't promise anything until you actually have seen me at my worst."

Frank sighed and rubbed circles into Gee's hand, "You're right, I don't know what you're like in that situation, but I know I'm sure gonna stick around to see. Maybe I can't promise that I'll stick around after that, but I'm not gonna leave before I know for sure, okay? So as far as I can see, I will stay with you no matter what. Also, if you don't talk to me for 6 months I'd probably just message Mikey a lot to make sure you weren't like, dead or something."

Gee leaned their head on Frank's shoulder and closed their eyes. They didn't know how to reply to Frank, they felt so... shocked, almost. Surprised at how Frank reacted to the point of silence. 

"You okay?" Frank asked, his voice soft and comforting. Gee nodded but stayed silent, not ready to say anything yet. Frank started stroking their back and Gee sat there for a while, eyes closed and not saying a word. 

Eventually, though, Frank broke the silence by asking, "You want me to put on some music or a movie or something?" 

Gee nodded and let Frank move away from them. They laid down on his bed and closed their eyes again. 

"Are you tired or something?" Frank asked, coming back over to them, now holding his laptop. 

"Nah, this is just a good position." Gee replied.

Frank laughed, "You have a point."

Frank started playing music- Gee wasn't exactly sure what it was exactly, but they liked it- and then laid down next to them. He turned so he was facing Gee and bit his lip, then asked hesitantly, "So... was everything you told me true? Like, have you really been suicidal since you were 11?"

Gee sighed deeply and turned away from Frank, mumbling, "Yeah, it's all true."

"Okay, I figured that was probably the case. I don't know why you'd lie about something like that, I just... I wanted to be sure." Frank reached out and touched Gee's shoulder, squeezing it comfortingly. It was weird, it now felt a lot easier to talk to Frank about this, like spilling their guts to him while black out drunk was actually a good thing. 

Okay, that still probably wasn't a good thing, but at least it didn't end _completely_ terrible.

Gee rolled over so they were facing Frank and again and smiled at him softly. They felt really lucky to be with him. They weren't sure how they got him, but they knew that it was probably a miracle. Or magic. Some unknown spell that they accidentally cast on Frank to make him like Gee. It was the only reason explanation as to why he would willingly date them.

“Frank?” Gee asked quietly.

“Yeah?” Frank whispered back.

“Why do you like me?”

Frank shrugged, “I don’t know, you’re just- you’re like really cool and funny and okay, you’re really fucking cute too. Also you’re just really fun to talk to, and you get me, y’know? So, yeah, that’s why I like you.”

“But why do you still want to be with me? I’m really hard to deal with and can be just… too much, I guess. Even I can’t deal with myself, so how could you want to?”

Frank reached out and started to stroke their hair, “I don’t know, I guess I just don’t see you as hard to deal with. Like, you say that you are hard to deal with, but I don’t see how. Nothing about how you act seems hard to deal with or too much.”

“Yeah, but I’m like bad at talking and am really clingy and bad at expressing myself in good or healthy ways and I just- fuck, I don’t know. I just don’t get it.” Gee sighed and closed their eyes. Frank continued stroking their hair, but stayed silent. Gee didn’t know what that meant.

“You’re not bad at talking. I mean, okay, maybe you aren’t the smoothest talker, and yeah maybe you will send me five hundred texts because I forgot to respond for an hour or two, but that doesn’t make you hard to deal with. It just, I don’t know, adds to who you are as a person- but not in a negative way. It’s just, y’know, how you are, and I’m fine with that.”

“You sure?” Gee asked. They still weren’t sure if they could believe Frank, it just didn’t seem possible.

“Yeah, I’m sure.” Frank smiled at them, then leaned in and kissed them softly. He pulled away after a few seconds, then said, “Trust me, I’d be upfront about it if I didn’t want to be with you anymore. I wouldn’t string you along if I thought you were annoying or too hard to deal with, I’d let you know. So, yeah, you don’t have to worry, I still like you. Like, a lot. I really, really like you, Gee.”

Gee giggled, “Yeah, well I really, really like you too, Frank.”

“I’m glad.” Frank grinned, then leaned in and kissed them again. Gee kissed back and the two just laid there kissing in Frank's bed for a while. Gee was afraid that their parents would get mad when they got home, since Gee hadn't told them that they were going out, but they didn't want to think about that. They just wanted to think about Frank.

After a while of just kissing, Gee moved so they were straddling Frank. Their kisses got deeper, and Frank started to run his hands up Gee's thighs. Gee gasped slightly, then hesitated. They suddenly felt awkward and uncomfortable, like they had no idea what they were doing. Mostly because they _didn't_ know what they were doing, but that's besides the point. They knew they wanted to do this, but they weren't sure they wanted Frank to see them completely naked yet.

Gee pulled away slightly and Frank looked at them with concern.

"Is this too much?" He asked, and Gee shook their head.

"No, I just- fuck, sorry. I;m just not sure if I want you to see me, y'know, naked. Gender things and all."

Frank's eyes light up in realization, "Oh! Oh, we don't have to do anything if you don't want to, obviously. If you're not ready then we can wait."

Gee sighed, "It's not that I don't want to or that I'm not ready, it's just.... fuck, I don't know. I really do want to, but can you just.... somehow _not_ look at my penis."

"Uhm, yeah, I can try?" 

Gee chew their lip nervously, "Are you sure you're okay with that?"

Frank smiled softly at them, "Yeah, of course I'm okay with it. Just tell me if you want me to stop, alright?"

"Yeah, I'll tell you if I want you to stop." Gee smiled at Frank, then continued to kiss him.

They kissed for a little while longer, when Frank pulled away and asked, "Wait, that was you saying you wanna have sex right? I wasn't misreading that?"

Gee giggled and kissed Frank's nose, "Yes, that was me saying that I want to have sex, you doofus."

Frank grinned, "Awesome."

He kissed Gee quickly, before pulling away and saying, "I uh, I need to like. Grab the stuff."

"Oh! Yeah, obviously." Gee laughed nervously, then moved off of Frank so he could get up and grab lube and condoms from his dresser. He came back quickly and climbed back onto the bed next to Gee. They both looked at each other awkwardly for a few seconds before Gee coughed, trying to break the awkward tension between them.

"Uh, this feels weird." Frank said, finally breaking the silence.

"Yeah... it kind of does. Is this like- is this okay for you?" Gee asked, biting their lip nervously.

Frank replied, "Yeah it is I'm just, I don't know. I'm not fully sure what to do, to be honest. Like, I know you won't know either, but I just feel like I _should_ know."

"Do you still wanna do this?"

"I don't know." Frank looked almost as nervous as Gee felt, and Gee realized that now probably wasn't the best time to do this.

"Maybe we should... wait." Gee said hesitantly, hoping Frank wouldn't get mad. Thankfully, he didn't get mad. In fact, he almost seemed relieved. Gee figured that was a good thing.

"Are you sure? If you want to we can." Frank looked scared- scared that Gee would insist on doing this?- and Gee reached out and squeezed his shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm sure. We both seem a bit too nervous for this to actually be a good thing."

Frank laughed, "Okay, that's true. Another time, maybe?"

Gee smiled, "Yeah, another time."

"Do you wanna stay here anyway? Would your parents get mad if you text them telling them you're gonna stay here the night?" Frank asked.

Gee shrugged, "I don't know, really. They might be a bit annoyed, but probably not too mad. Plus, I don't really feel like going home right now anyway, so I'll just stay. I mean, as long as your parents are fine with that."

Frank giggled, "They're definitely fine with that. I think they're happy I finally have a friend who isn't a 'bad influence.'"

"Oh man, I can't believe I'm the good friend. I'm pretty sure I'm the rebel at church."

"Holy shit, really? Oh my god that's- that's so ridiculous." Frank started laughing more and Gee rolled their eyes at him.

"It's true! I'm like- I'm like this vaguely gender non-conforming, probably gay, quiet kid who listens to shit that's consider 'hardcore' for strict, conservative moms. One time Josh's mom told him that she didn't him hanging out with me and Mikey because we might 'lead him off the right path.' My mom always keeps an eye on me to make sure i'm not corrupting poor and innocent heterosexual children. I'm like the you of youth group."

Frank was now laughing hysterically, and Gee punched him lightly on the shoulder, saying "It's not that funny, dude!"

"No, no it's fucking _hilarious_ , holy shit. I can't believe you're the bad boy of the youth group. You have like 5 miniature dinosaur toys that you found on the sidewalk that you had to keep because they were broken and in need of a home. You once cried because of a really cute dog. You are currently wearing a _Relient K_ shirt, for god's sake."

Gee started laughing too and said, "Okay, you have a point, it is pretty ridiculous. But it's not my fault all these mom's are strict as fuck! It's just- fuck, it's just, oh my god I can't stop laughing."

They both collapsed into a pile of giggles on Frank's bed. Gee's stomach was starting to hurt from laughing so much, but they felt happy and that's all that mattered. 

Also, Frank looked really fucking cute when he laughed hysterically.

When they both stopped laughing as much, Frank sat back up and asked, "So, am I the only one who's hungry, or do you want me to figure dinner out for us?"

Gee grinned and sat up too, replying with, "Yeah, I'm pretty hungry, too. I haven't eaten in like, forever."

Concern suddenly washed over Frank's face and Gee thought _oh shit, here we go_. 

"When was the last time you ate? Has it been days or are you just being hyperbolic? Gee, are you-"

Gee cut Frank off by putting their finger over his mouth, saying "Shh... shh.... be quiet... this is normal shh..."

Frank swatted Gee's finger away, "Just because it's normal for you doesn't make it healthy. Seriously, when did you last eat?"

Gee rolled their eyes and shrugged, "A day or two ago? I don't know, man, you know I have a shit memory."

"Yes, I know that, but still it shouldn't be _a day or two_ what the fuck, Gee. C'mon, we're getting you something to eat." Frank got off the bed and pulled Gee up with him. 

\----------

Once Frank had given Gee something to eat, they had gone back to Frank's room and had cuddled up while watching tv together. It was nice like this, just lying together watching mindless tv shows on Frank's bed. Gee wished they could stay with Frank forever. Obviously, they knew that wouldn't be possible, but they could still dream.

Frank had fallen asleep a little while ago and Gee wanted to join him, but they found that sleep just wouldn't come. They just watched him sleep, though. Stroking his hair and wishing they could take a picture of him so they could capture how peaceful he looked while he slept. They wondered what he was dreaming about, whether he would remember what his dream was when he woke up, whether he was dreaming at all.

Gee didn't realize they had finally fallen asleep until they had woken up. Frank was propped up on his elbow beside them, just watching them as they slept. Gee scrunched up their face at Frank and mumbled, "Are you watchin' me sleep, ya nerd?"

Frank laughed and replied, "I might be."

"Why?" 

"You're cute when you sleep."

"Says you." Gee said with a giggle. The giggle turned into a yawn, though, making it sound more like a weird, strangled sound. Frank laughed softly and kissed the top of their head, making Gee blush crimson. Frank grinned and kissed their nose, then whispered, "You are honestly the cutest, Gee."

"No, you are." Gee mumbled, trying to hide their embarrassment.

Frank shook his head, "Nope, it's definitely you." He kissed their forehead, "You are the cutest," kissed their cheeks. "Prettiest," kissed their nose. "Loveliest," kissed them on the lips. "Most wonderful girl ever."

Gee probably looked like a goddamn tomato at this point, they felt like they were going to explode. They didn't realize anyone would ever think of them this way, it surprised them. They tried to cover up their shock by leaning up and kissing Frank. 

They kissed for a long while, completely enveloped in the feeling of being together. They stopped kissing and just rested their foreheads together, breathing deeply on time with each other.

Gee was in love.

Of course, they would never tell Frank that. They didn't want to make things weird. What if he didn't love them back? What if he was lying earlier when he said he wouldn't string them along, and that would just be the last straw? There were too many risks to telling him. No, they would have to wait to say that- if they ever even did tell him.

But for now they were satisfied just laying in bed with him, kissing and laughing and feeling alive for the first time in years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feel free to comment/leave kudos bc they make me feel loved and hmu on [tumblr](http://transboykobrakid.tumblr.com/) and/or [twitter](https://twitter.com/Allegrcat) okay ily guys


	18. 1 Corinthians 14:26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Gay bees. Now that is something I’ve never thought about. Are there any gay bees?” Ryan asked.
> 
> “I thought we were the gay bees?” Josh replied, looking at Mikey questioningly.
> 
> “We are the gay bees, that’s what I’m trying to say!” Mikey exclaimed.
> 
> “When you say gay bees really quickly it sounds funny.” Pete said, “Gay bees gay bees gay bees gay bees.”

Mikey was preparing for summer camp, packing and making sure everything was in order. Since he wasn't allowed to go to winter camp, he was now extra excited to go to the summer one. 

He was glad that his parents were letting him go; he briefly been afraid that they wouldn't let him go. But, apparently they trusted the leaders enough to let Mikey stay in a place with Pete that had lots of small, hideaway spaces for two teenage boys to make out in. 

Or maybe they just thought that Mikey and Pete's relationship really was over.

That seemed ridiculous to Mikey, but as far as his parents were concerned, it _was_ over. Which was exactly how Mikey wanted to keep it, since it made it easier for him and Pete to continue dating.

Mikey was currently sitting on his bedroom floor packing all his clothes. He always put this off until the day before, which made it that he always would forget at _least_ one important thing. Every year they handed out a list of "essential" things to bring, but every single fucking year Mikey forgot half of the list. At this point it was just getting ridiculous.

Once he was completely packed- including him checking and double checking to make sure he didn't forge anything- he got up to go to Gee's room to see how they were doing with the whole packing thing.

Turns out they had given up about half way through and were now staring at their ceiling and singing along to music. Seemed about right.

Mikey laid down on the bed next to Gee and put his head on their chest. To be honest, he was a bit nervous to go to summer camp. He knew that his parents told Dallon- and maybe some of the other youth leaders- to keep a close eye on him and Pete, so he was scared that he wouldn't have much quality time with Pete. It's not like he was expecting anything to happen, he just wanted to hang out with Pete without Dallon breathing down his neck. Dallon was cool, though, so he probably would just make sure they didn't sneak off together to fuck or something.

Mikey voiced his thoughts to Gee and they replied, saying, "Yeah, but it's you two. You guys are like the sneakiest motherfuckers I know, and that's including me. Everything's gonna be alright."

"But how do you know? I don't want a repeat of New Year's Eve, Gee."

"You won't get a repeat of New Year's Eve, Mikey, I can feel it. Things will go good for you, okay? Trust me, they probably won't even keep that much of an eye on you, since it's been so long since they first caught you two. Everything will be okay."

Mikey sighed, "I guess, but you don't know that for sure."

"Yeah, but I got a good vibe about summer camp. I think something good is gonna happen."

Mikey looked up at Gee suspiciously, "I don't trust your vibe."

"You should, though! Like, okay, everything constantly feels like it's gonna go bad for me, right? So if I get good vibes that probably means something good will _actually_ happen. It's just logic, Mikey." Gee grinned.

Mikey rolled his eyes, "Yeah, sure, logic. I'm sure you're _totally_ right."

"Just watch, something good is gonna happen at camp and you're gonna feel bad for doubting me."

"Oh yeah, _definitely._ "

Gee grinned, "Of course, I'm always right, aren't I?"

"Literally that statement isn't true in the slightest. You are wrong like ninety percent of the time."

"Now that is a lie."

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

Mikey laughed and shoved Gee, then got up and walked over to the door. He turned back to look at Gee and said, "Go pack, you idiot. Don't repeat last years incident where you literally forgot to pack until 10 minutes before we had to leave."

"I could do as you say, but where's the fun in that? This adds drama, suspense- intrigue even. Imagine if I went to camp with no change of clothes or toiletries! What would I do then?"

Mikey grinned, "You'd live exactly like you live at home."

"Okay... you have a point. But I can't let anyone know how gross I really, truly am, Mikey."

"I think they already know, dude."

"Yes, but they don't know explicitly, so therefore it isn't true. I am obviously not disgusting unless I tell them outright.

"You have a point, but consider: you smell awful and obviously wear the same clothes multiple weeks in a row." Mikey pointed out.

"But they don't know that I don't wash the clothes in between days."

"It's pretty obvious you don't, Gee."

"Whatever! Leave my room if you're gonna keep bashing me like this!" Gee said, gasping and looking fake offended.

"Fine, I'll leave. You still should pack, though."

"I know, I know. I just have to actually feel like doing it."

"It will never happen if you wait for that, dude."

"Exactly. Can you help me?"

"Okay, bye Gee." Mikey laughed and finally left the room, ignoring Gee's shouts about bribing him with candy to help them pack. They could do that themselves, goddammit. Plus, he already was drained from packing his own bag. He wasn't going to get double drained just so he could do something "nice" for his sibling, thank you very much.

Mikey got back to his room and grabbed his phone from his desk, quickly sending Pete a text asking if Patrick was going to come to camp with them again this year.

Mikey really liked Patrick, and he was sad that he didn't hang out with him as much. They mostly only hung out whenever Pete was hosting something, which hadn't happened in a while. He really should try to get Patrick's number, maybe try to hang out with him sometime.

Pete texted back quickly, saying " _yeah of course pats coming why wouldnt he_ "

" _idk i was just double checking_ "

" _yeah okay well hes coming dw. u excited?? i missed u during winter camp :( glad ur allowed to go to this tho summer camp is always way funner_ "

" _i know right im so happy im allowed to go id cry if i couldnt_ "

" _awh no i dont want u to cry babe :(_ "

" _im not crying thats what im saying nerd_ "

" _yeah whatever fuckass just let me be a nice bf okay_ "

" _no thats my job_ "

" _its both of our jobs_ "

" _okay whatever_ "

Mikey was smiling at his phone like a fucking nerd. Man, he was so glad his parents didn't go through his phone, that would fucking suck. That was the one thing he was thankful for about his parents, they actually didn't snoop _that_ much. Okay, they did snoop a little, but not as much anymore. He still was paranoid as fuck that they would find something bad- or at least bad to their standards- but so far they hadn't seemed to find anything, so even if they _were_ looking he apparently was just really good at hiding things.

Mikey eventually went back to Gee's room to see if they had packed and, to his surprise, they actually had. He stayed in there with them for the rest of the night, talking about previous summer camps and things that might happen during the upcoming week.

\----------

The one downside to going to summer camp this year was, well, Mikey and Pete had to get to the church even earlier everyone else so Dallon could give them a talk. This talk, of course, was one of the most uncomfortable things Mikey has ever had to sit through. It was basically twenty minutes of Dallon telling them not to fuck or make out or anything remotely sexual/romantic, but without him saying anything out right. He chose his words carefully and used a lot of hand motions and, well, Mikey almost was regretting even coming. Almost.

After that was finally over, Mikey and Pete went outside to see that almost everyone was here now. Gee had already been there, obviously, since they were the one who drove Mikey and Pete. They were currently talking to Ray and Frank and wow, people would definitely realize Gee and Frank were dating if they kept acting like that. They weren't _technically_ touching, but they might as well be. Mikey wasn't even sure if they were doing it on purpose or if they didn't notice. Knowing Gee, they probably didn't realize how close they were standing to Frank.

"Yo, Mikey!" Josh called from the other side of the parking lot, making Mikey's heart start beating quicker in his chest for some reason. He waved Josh over and grinned when Josh ran over to them. 

"Josh! Hey man! You gonna ride with us?" Mikey asked, trying hard to stop grinning so much. Seriously, what was up with that? It's not like there was anything different about Josh, so why was Mikey feeling differently about him?

Josh replied, "Nah, I promised Tyler I would ride with him. Well, promised him like forever ago, but yeah. Unless you're gonna ride with Dallon? 'Cause we're in Dallon's van."

"Oh, okay. But, nope, we're in Jon's van." Mikey said with a grin.

"Seriously? Man, now I really wish I was riding with you guys. Jon's van is sick."

"I know! His van is awesome, it's gonna be great. Mikes, you know who else we're riding with?" Pete asked.

Mikey shrugged, "I'm assuming Patrick?" Pete nodded, "Also probably Gee and Frank, which means obviously Ray. Uh, yeah that's it."

"Shit, wish I could go with you guys. I mean, it's not like there's room left for me, but still. That sounds like it's gonna be awesome."

"Maybe we can ride together on the way back?" Mikey suggested, sounding a bit too hopeful than he meant to.

Josh grinned widely, "Yeah, we should! The three of us in the back of Dallon's van, sound good? We can be like. We can be like the three musketeers or something."

Mikey giggled and blushed slightly, "Yeah, that sounds like it will be great."

Suddenly Mikey was hit with an overwhelming feeling of guilt. He had a crush on Josh.

Fuck, how was he gonna tell Pete.

He did have to tell Pete, right? Communication is what made relationships work, or something. He wasn't sure exactly, he just knew Gee always yelled about communication a lot. The real question was how did he even bring it up? Did he just take Pete to a more private area and bluntly say, "I have a crush on Josh."

God, it was weird thinking about that. Mikey wasn't sure when he started feeling like this. Maybe it was when Josh came out to him and Pete? It might have happened before that, he just was able to ignore it easier because he thought there would be no chance with Josh.

Except, there was no chance with Josh. Mikey was with Pete, end of story. There was no way he would let this small crush somehow get in between him and Pete. They had been through so much together, Mikey wouldn't let this end their relationship. But man, it definitely would make things complicated- especially if Josh kept smiling at him like that, goddamn.

Mikey was definitely fucked.

The rest of the morning was a blur, Mikey not paying much attention as Dallon said the rules and prayed over them before they got in their cars and drove. Mikey, Pete, and Patrick were sitting in the back of Jon's van- Pete in the middle with Patrick and Mikey on either side of him.

It was easy to not think about Josh when Pete was squished into Mikey's side, sitting way closer than was necessary. Not that Mikey was complaining, he liked being able to sit this close to Pete. Thank god Jon didn't seem to notice- or care. He was too busy getting in a long discussion with Ray- who was sitting up front next to Jon- about music, or something.

Pete was going on about something that had happened at work and Mikey couldn't help grinning at him. He was so cute when he got into telling stories, Mikey thought. He even noticed Patrick smiling lovingly at Pete which, okay, weird, but Mikey wasn't gonna think too much on that.

"So, then, the asshole fucking threw his drink on me! I was so shocked! Like, okay, I had dealt with assholes before, but he literally dumped like 21 ounces of soda on me! I mean, I'm pretty sure now he's banned from coming back, but still!" Pete was waving his hands about wildly as he told the story, making Mikey have to duck and dodge a few times or else he'd be hit in the face. He did actually hit Patrick in the face at one point, meaning he spent the next twenty minutes begging Patrick for forgiveness- Patrick eventually having to yell over Pete's begging to shut the fuck up.

Pete was moping after Patrick yelled at him, making Mikey laugh and Patrick just roll his eyes at Pete.

"What was I supposed to do? You wouldn't stop apologizing! I barely even felt it, dude." Patrick said with a huff.

"Well I'm sorry for feeling bad about hitting you in the face! Next time I'll just do what Mikey's doing and laugh my ass off!"

Mikey started laughing harder and buried his face in Pete's shoulder, trying to suppress his laughter. It's not like he was laughing at Pete hitting Patrick, he was laughing at how they both reacted after he hit Patrick in the face. It was totally understandable that he would laugh, thank you very much.

They settled down after a bit, only giggling occasionally. The car got quiet after that, almost too quiet. Mikey expected this car to be a lot louder when he heard who was going to be in it.

Apparently Gee agreed, because after a few minutes they said, "Dude, someone needs to turn music on, I'm gonna start crying if it's this quiet for any longer."

Ray snorted, but then plugged his iPod in to play music. Suddenly, everyone in the van was laughing hysterically. Well, everyone except Frank, who just looked confused.

"I can't believe you have the fucking Cheeseburger Song on your iPod!" Gee said through their laughter, clutching their chest and eyes watering.

"What?! I have the entire Veggie Tales soundtrack, dude. Which is completely normal and don't tell me you wouldn't have that it too, if you had an iPod." Ray grumbled, his arms crossed and glaring ahead of him.

"What even is this?" Frank asked, still looking confused. There was a collective gasp from everyone else in the car, making Frank roll his eyes and say, "Don't be all weird youth group on me, not my fault I didn't grow up with- with whatever the fuck this is."

"It's the Cheeseburger Song, obviously." Gee replied with a grin, then immediately started to sing along. Soon, everyone else in the car was singing and Frank was hiding his face in his hands.

"That's it, I definitely am in a cult. You guys are probably taking me to the mountains to make it official, aren't you?" Frank asked, looking at everyone in the van suspiciously.

"Nope, we're actually going to kill you." Jon replied casually.

"Great, glad we got that cleared up." Frank laughed, but still was looking at everyone closely, as if they were about to kill him that instant. But, instead of killing the oh so wonderful Frank, they all just started singing louder and harmonizing with each other. It was quite intense, they all got very into singing their Veggie Tales.

When the song ended, there was a collective boo from everyone in the car, so Ray ended up just playing the Veggie Tales soundtrack instead of his other music. Everyone- except Frank- started to cheer loudly, and the rest of the drive was filled with them singing loudly along to the music.

They were the first car to arrive at the lodge and they all piled out, still singing loudly- even though the music wasn't playing anymore. Even Frank had gotten warmed up to the music after a while.

It wasn't long before everyone else started arriving; car after car pulled into the parking lot, and soon the entire place was full of noises- people talking and laughing loudly, making jokes about things that had happened on the way up. Josh ran over to Pete and Mikey and pulled them both into a tight hug, giggling and saying, "Can't believe you guys got here before us! Usually Jon is the last to arrive."

Ashley came up next to Josh and rested her arm on his shoulder, saying, "Yeah, it's because Jenna kept making us delay by having to pee every five seconds."

"Hey! I didn't pee that much!" Jenna yelled from the other side of the parking lot, making Ashley laugh and roll her eyes.

Ashley leaned in closer and muttered, "She's lying, she had to pee constantly. But hey, I'm not complaining. Being stuck in a car for that long without moving around at all sucks balls."

Josh laughed, "Yeah, I agree. Although, I am gonna complain about how gross Tyler and Jenna were being. Like, I love them both, but seriously! They should know where to draw the line on pda."

"Wait, Tyler and Jenna are a thing now? Like, officially?" Pete asked, sounding intrigued.

"Yeah, this happened like a week or so ago. But now we gotta deal with them being all gross and lovey dovey with each other." Josh replied, shaking his head disapprovingly.

"Dude, Mikey and I have been gross and lovey dovey in front of you and you haven't complained about us." Pete pointed out.

Josh shrugged, "I don't know, it just doesn't bother me as much for some reason."

"Really?" Mikey was surprised, it's not like there was any difference between him and Pete and Tyler and Jenna.

"Yeah, I don't know, is that weird? Should I complain about you guys? Because I'll complain if you want me to."

Pete laughed, "Nah, you don't have to complain. Just revel in how adorable we are."

"What we really should be complaining about is those two." Mikey said, gesturing at Frank and Gee.

Pete laughed and nodded in agreement, saying, "Okay, true. Remember Frank's party? That was.... that was a side to Gee I did not know existed."

"Man, we don't talk about Frank's party. God, that started so much shit. Gee was moping for like three weeks straight. At least they finally started talking again." Mikey added with a snort.

"Wait, what was this? Frank's party? What happened? Tell me, tell me! Teellll meee." Josh was grabbing Mikey's arm and shaking it about, somehow trying to use that to convince Mikey to tell him.

Mikey rolled his eyes and pulled his arm away, replying, "I don't think it's my place to tell."

Josh sighed, "Fine, don't tell me. I'll ask Gee."

"Wait, no don't-" Mikey started, but Josh interrupted him by yelling, "Gerard! Come here!"

Gee looked at them with confusion, but walked over to them anyway. They started running their fingers through their hair and asked, "What do you want?"

Josh grinned and asked, "So, what happened at-"

Josh was- to Mikey's relief- interuptted by another car arriving in the parking lot. Pete perked up, already making his way over to the new car. Mikey went with him, hoping that Josh would be too distracted to finish asking Gee about the party. The car door opened suddenly, and a grin spread across Pete's face as Ryan Ross practically fell out of the car- screaming for some reason.

"Ryan! Long time no see!" Pete yelled excitedly, running over to Ryan and holding out his arms for a hug. Ryan turned so he was facing Pete and grinned, running over and hugging Pete.

"Pete, you asshole! You never text me nowadays! I'm hurt." Ryan exclaimed when they finally stopped hugging.

"Sorry! I've been busy and, uh, distracted." Mikey noticed Pete glancing at him when he said this, and tried not to think of all the reasons Pete would be distracted.

"That's a terrible excuse and you know it."

Pete sighed and rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I know it is. But here we are now! And you can beat me up for not texting as much, I'll understand."

"Implying Ryan could beat anyone up." Spencer said, startling Mikey who hadn't realized he was standing there. Spencer grinned and added, "He's too tiny."

"I am taller than you, asshole." Ryan huffed.

"Yes, but you are also too skinny. You're like a shriveled up tree. Tall? Yes. Would be easily knocked over from a strong gust of wind? Also yes."

Ryan shoved Spencer and mumbled, "Asshole."

Spencer laughed, but turned his attention back to Mikey and Pete and said, "But hey guys! It's been a while."

"Yeah, it has. Seems like forever, even though it's only been a year." Mikey said.

"Guys, why am I the only one actually grabbing my bag?" Brendon asked, still standing over by the car.

"Because we're being sociable, Brendon." Ryan yelled back.

"You guys suck."

Pete laughed, "Hey, I also didn't grab my bags!"

"You guys are some lazy motherfuckers, what the hell." Mikey said.

"I agree, lets leave them alone. Let these lazy assholes catch up, and whatnot." Spencer suggested.

"Good plan! C'mon, lets go be not lazy elsewhere." Mikey said, then left Ryan and Pete to catch up. Mikey wondered if Pete would tell Ryan about him and Mikey. It's not like Ryan would freak out or anything- Mikey knew this for sure since last year they both had come out to each other, bonding over the fact that they both had crushes on "straight" guys- he just was curious as to how he would react.

Funnily enough, he soon found out how Ryan would react, since he suddenly yelled, "Dude, Mikey, nice!" with an exaggerated wink and thumbs up. Mikey blushed and covered his face with his hands, making Spencer ask, "What was that about?"

Mikey turned a brighter shade of red and stuttered out, "Uhm, me and Pete, uh- we kind of are dating now? Uh, yeah. We're dating."

Spencer started to grin and said, "Shit, really? Dude, that's awesome. I totally knew you liked him, but I had no idea he liked you back! Man, looking back it was so obvious. When'd you guys get together?"

"Wait, was it really that obvious?" Spencer nodded a yes, then Mikey continued, "Huh, weird. But, uhm, I think around early December? I can't remember the exact date, but around late November early December."

"That's awesome, I'm happy for you guys. I always thought you guys would be cute together, y'know? Since you always were glued at the hip and shit."

Mikey laughed, "Yeah, we are pretty adorable. Although, it was real shitty when people found us making out in church. Not good, not good."

Spencer's eyes widened, "Oh shit, what happened after that?"

"Oh, you know, grounded for about five months, never allowed to hang out alone together again, stuff like that. Eventually we were able to sneak around those rules, though."

Spencer snorted, "Yeah, that sounds like you guys. I can't believe you're actually dating, though."

"Is it really that unbelievable?"

"Not really, I just figured it'd be one of those things that was super obvious but never actually happened."

Mikey grinned, "Well thankfully it did end up happening."

"Yeah!" Spencer grinned back and the two of them went inside together. It was much quieter inside, but only because everyone was still outside. Once everyone got inside it would be incredibly loud, but a good loud. The sort of loud that was actually enjoyable and not annoying.

They went to the boy's sleeping area and put their stuff down on opposite bunks, deciding that they would both be on the top bunks.

"I don't care what Ryan says," Spencer said as he threw his bag on his bed, "Top bunks are the best."

Mikey grinned, "I agree. Although, I do see his point that you can make blanket forts easier in bottom bunks."

"Pfft, all I need is some thumb tacks to make a blanket fort on the top bunk. Problem solved."

"Are you guys still going on about the top bunk or bottom bunk thing? I thought we settled this last year." Pete said, startling Mikey who hadn't realized he was there.

"Damn right we're still going on about that. It's an important subject, Pete." Spencer replied, making Ryan- who was standing next to Pete- roll his eyes.

"I don't even care if you prefer the top bunk, it just means I'll be able to have the bottom bunk without anyone complaining." Ryan said as he put his stuff on the bunk under Spencer's.

"Ah, so this is where the party is." Josh threw his arm around Mikey's shoulder and pulled him close, making Mikey's heart beat so quickly he was afraid he might explode. 

"You know it." Pete replied with a grin. Josh grinned back at Pete and Mikey had inexplicable butterflies in his stomach that he immediately tried to beat down. He had enough drama in his life and he wouldn't accept anymore, thank you very much.

"So, is that the only new thing happening in your life, or did you forget to mention something?" Ryan asked.

Pete responded, "Well, I did get a job."

"How did _you_ manage that?" 

"My people skills, obviously."

Ryan snorted, "I highly doubt it was that, Pete."

"I can't believe this, I thought we were _friends_." Pete grumbled.

Ryan shrugged, "That's why I'm doubting this."

"You are the worst friend ever. I'm replacing you with Brendon."

Ryan rolled his eyes, "Right, right. I'm pretty sure this group is too gay for him."

Mikey put his hand on Ryan's shoulder, "Babe, Brendon is the least straight 'straight guy' I know. This group is definitely not too gay for him."

"Yeah, plus the only gay people here are you, Mikey, and Pete." Spencer pointed out.

"Oh, uh, actually? That's not the case. I'm also gay. Or, well, not _gay_ but y'know, into dudes and stuff." Josh stuttered out, looking nervously at the floor.

"Huh." Spencer said, "Guess this is a really gay group."

"Which sucks, because of Tyler. Like, love the guy, but _man_ is he a dick sometimes." Josh said, shaking his head disapprovingly. 

Pete snorted, "Only sometimes?"

"Okay, correction: I didn't realize how much of a dick he was until New Year's Eve."

"Wait, what did Tyler do?" Ryan asked, looking at Josh and Pete in confusion.

"Ohh did we not tell you?" Mikey laughed, then explained, "Uhm, so y'know how I mentioned people found us making out at church? Well by 'people' I mean 'Tyler' and by 'found us' I mean 'started yelling at us and calling us slurs and being an overall dickhead.'"

"Yeah, but Frank punched him, so that's cool." Pete added, nodding in approval at the memory of Frank punching Tyler in the face.

"Who's Frank?" Spencer asked.

"Oh my god, you haven't met Frank?-" Pete started, but was interrupted by Ryland saying, "Hey, guys, head to the dining hall for dinner."

Mikey jumped slightly, not having realized that Ryland had been standing behind him. Pete looked at Ryland in confusion and asked, "It's dinnertime already?"

Ryland nodded, "Yeah, we apparently got here later than usual or something so less time to get settled before dinner. You still have a few more minutes, but you probably should head to the dining room soon."

"Oh, okay. We'll head down soon, then. Also, good to see you, Ryland!" Pete said and waved as Ryland walked away from the group of boys.

Ryan made a low growling noise and mumbled, "Good to see him, my  _ ass _ ."

"Uh, what?" Mikey asked as they all headed down to the dining hall.

Spencer snorted, "Ignore him, he's just bitter about the car ride."

"We could have died!"

Spencer rolled his eyes, "We wouldn't have died, this isn't the first time he's driven us up here."

"Yes, but he's never been this bad! He should realize that he shouldn't be speeding while we're  _ driving up a mountain _ !"

"Oh my god, was he really speeding?" Pete asked with a laughed.

"Yeah, and it was terrifying. He got  _ very _ close to driving off the ledge, I swear to god.” Ryan grumbled.

“No he did not! Ryan’s just being overdramatic.” 

“He did! He did and I’ll prove it by asking everyone else.” 

They got to the dining hall and found an empty table to sit at. Mikey sat in between Pete and Josh. Ryan and Spencer sat across from them, Ryan still talking passionately about the drive up and how Ryland really needs to learn how to slow down on sharp turns. 

Patrick walked over to the table and sat across from Pete, smiling and saying hi to Spencer and Ryan. He started catching up with Spencer, talking about various things that had happened since the previous summer. 

Mikey zoned out for a bit, just looking around at everyone in the room. Ray was sitting with Ashley and they seemed to be in a deep conversation about something. They both looked serious and like they were getting very into whatever they were talking about. Mikey would have to ask Ray about it later.

Mikey was drawn out of his thoughts by Gee saying, “Ryan, Spencer, good to see you two! I was talking to Lynn earlier, but I hadn’t seen you guys yet. What’s up? How have you guys been?”   


Ryan smiled at Gee and replied, “I’ve been good! It’s been a pretty dull year, though. Nothing interesting with us.”

“Says you, I got a girlfriend during the year.” Spencer said with a grin.

Ryan rolled his eyes, “We get it, you’re a cool hetero who can get relationships willy nilly.”

“Ryan, you know goddamn well that Linda is my first girlfriend.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

Gee laughed and ran their fingers through their hair, “That’s great, though, Spencer. You should tell me about her sometime.”

“Don’t tell him that, you’ve just invited him to tell you every single fucking thing about her. Seriously, he won’t shut up about her. They’re so adorable it’s sickening.”

Spencer shoved Ryan slightly, “Oh, shut up. You’re just jealous because the boy you like doesn’t like you back.”

“Are you talking about Brendon? Because, uh, I’m not the most observant but even  _ I _ can tell that he likes Ryan.” Gee said.

Ryan groaned and hid his face with his hands, saying, “Would you guys shut up?”

“Gee, there you are! I totally got distracted and forgot to walk with you here.” Frank said, running up to Gee while grinning. God, speaking of so adorable it’s sickening. Just seeing the way Gee’s face light up when Frank came over should be enough proof to everyone that they were totally in love.

“Frank! I thought you abandoned me!” Gee laughed, but Mikey could tell that they were being at least partially serious. 

“I would never abandon you, Gee.” Frank replied. 

While Frank and Gee made heart eyes at each other, Ryan gave Mikey a look that said  _ they’re dating, right? _ Mikey just nodded in response.

After a bit, Frank and Gee left and walked over to the table that Ray and Ashley were sitting at. Pete laughed and said, “Well now you know who Frank is.”

“So, they’re dating.” Ryan said matter of factly.

“Yup, definitely dating.” Mikey responded.

“Really,  _ really _ not surprising that Gerard is gay.”

“Also, why are we like the two gayest churches ever? I’m pretty sure this isn’t a normal amount of gay people at church, guys.” Josh said.

Mikey shrugged, “I don’t know, maybe we’re like gay honey. But like, gay people are also the bees. We’re the gay honey and new gay people are the gay bees.”

“I don’t think bees are attracted to honey. Like, don’t they make the honey? So we should be the gay bees and the new people should be the gay honey, or something.” Pete said, scrunching up his face in thought.

“Gay bees. Now that is something I’ve never thought about. Are there any gay bees?” Ryan asked.

“I thought we were the gay bees?” Josh replied, looking at Mikey questioningly.

“We are the gay bees, that’s what I’m trying to say!” Mikey exclaimed.

“When you say gay bees really quickly it sounds funny.” Pete said, “Gay bees gay bees gay bees gay bees.”

Josh started giggling and leaned his head on Mikey’s shoulder, saying, “Oh my god, stop saying gay bees, Pete.”

Pete leaned over so he was right in Josh’s face and said, “Make me, nerd.”

Mikey suddenly had the realization that he was basically sandwiched between two cute boys which, okay, was terrible for a queer teenage boy. They were  _ right there _ and he wanted to kiss them  _ both _ . Why were his emotions like this? Why did he have to like two boys at the same time? Why did his brain hate him so?

His inner mourning was interrupted by Pete poking him in the face and then giggling when Mikey swatted his hand away.

“You were looking all broody and shit, what’s up with that?” Pete asked, starting to play with Mikey’s hair.

Mikey shrugged and mumbled, “I don’t know, probably just zoning out or something.”

Josh still had his head resting on Mikey’s shoulder- which, by the way, was still the worst thing ever- and said, “You sure you’re alright? You looked sorta upset.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, “I swear, I’m fine. I’m just tired from the drive, probably.”

“I get that, I’m tired too. It’s so weird, why is riding in a car so tiring? It’s not like I’m doing anything, I’m literally just sitting in a car. It’s so weird.” Josh said.

Mikey leaned his head on Josh’s head and muttered, “I wanna nap.”

“We can nap later, you and me. It’ll be great, we can cuddle.” Pete responded. 

Josh grumbled and moved away from Mikey, saying, “I wish I had someone to cuddle with.”

Mikey was disappointed that Josh moved away, he wanted him to stay close. 

“Cuddle with us, it will be great.” Pete said, reaching over and patting Josh on the head.

Josh smiled at Pete, “Really?”

“Of course! I’m sure we can cram three people into one bunk.”

“No, no you definitely can’t.” Spencer grumbled.

Ryan snorted, “Just because you weren’t willing to lay on top of me doesn’t mean there wasn’t enough room for the three of us, Spencer.”

“Yeah, but I’m totally willing to lie on top of Mikey, so there will be enough room.” Pete said.

“Great!” Josh grinned, “So, cuddle time later?”

Mikey now new for a matter of fact that Josh and Pete had developed a plot to kill Mikey. It was the only explanation, nothing else made sense. Between their slight- was it even slight?- flirting and adorable smiles, Mikey didn’t have a chance. He was definitely going to die at the hands of two very, very cute boys.

Two cute boys who were devil incarnate, that is.

The conversation seemed to shift while Mikey wasn’t paying attention, and the next thing he heard was Pete asking, “So, how are things over at your church?”

“They moved us into a closet.” Ryan replied.

“What? Why’d they do that?” Josh asked, sounding shocked.

“There is a  _ huge _ influx in babies.” Ryland said, suddenly coming over to the table and sitting next to Ryan, “Like, so many babies. You want a baby? Because we have a lot to spare.”

Mikey laughed, “There can’t be that many babies.”

“There is, actually.” Spencer sighed, “I don’t think anyone in this church likes teenagers.”

“That’s not true! I like teenagers.” Ryland said.

Ryan rolled his eyes, “You don’t count, though.”

“Why not?”

“Because you like,  _ just _ left the youth group yourself. You’re still basically one of us.”

“I’m the leader I’m not ‘basically one of you.’ I am your God.”

Spencer laughed, “That doesn’t seem like the sort of thing a youth leader would say.”

“Yeah, well, I’m your youth leader and I just said it so...” Ryland shrugged, then got up and added, “I’m gonna go sit with the other leaders who will actually appreciate me now. Goodbye.”

“He’s weird.” Josh said when Ryland had walked away to sit with William and Gabe.

“Imagine having him as your leader.” Ryan said with a laugh.

“I mean, he isn’t that bad actually, he just... isn’t exactly traditional. In any way.” Spencer said.

“What do you mean?” Josh asked.

“He, uhm, he just doesn’t exactly teach us the sort of stuff other people would.” Spencer replied awkwardly.

“He gave us a pretty in depth sex ed talk that included gay shit.” Ryan explained.

Pete started laughing, “Holy shit, really? That must have been weird.”

“Oh yeah, it was totally weird. I mean, I guess it’s good? I think he caught on that about half of the people in his group are not straight, and that we’re teenagers and probably won’t follow the whole ‘abstinence only’ thing. It’s not like,  _ bad _ it’s not not really normal.” 

Spencer nodded in agreement, “Yeah, like yes we might have got locked in a closet-”

“They didn’t lock the door.” Ryan interrupted.

“-Yes he  _ might _ have accidentally given us moldy food, and  _ yes  _ he does juggle too much during his lessons, but goddamn he did give us good sex ed and didn’t bash homosexuality, and that’s what’s really important.”

Pete was laughing a lot now, leaning against Mikey slightly. Josh whistled softly and said, “Man, your youth group sounds weird. I thought ours was bad, but I think ours is pretty normal. At least normal compared to yours.”

“Yep, our group is fucking weird. Apparently having only five kids locked in a closet together will do that.”

“Five kids plus Ryland.” Spencer corrected.

Ryan rolled his, “Close enough.”

“Yeah, but I’m pretty sure Ryland is the reason everything is so weird. Remember when he tried to make us play that Silent Football game? That was fucking hell.”

Ryan shook his head rapidly, “Don’t remind me of Silent Football. I’m gonna burn that game to the ground.”

Spencer suddenly yelled “SHWAH” in Ryan’s face, startling multiple people at other tables around them. Ryan groaned loudly and hit Spencer’s arm, saying, “You are the worst.”

Josh raised his eyebrows, “I don’t think I wanna know what that means.”

“Trust me, you don’t.” Ryan grumbled while Spencer laughed.

\----------

After dinner, Mikey was sitting with Pete in the bunks. Pete was leaning his head on Mikey’s shoulder and telling him some story that Ryan had told him earlier. Mikey wasn’t paying attention, though. He was thinking about the best way to tell Pete that he had a crush on Josh. Now seemed like the best time, they were basically alone and already talking quietly together, but he just didn’t know how to bring it up.

“Mikey? You alright?” He heard Pete ask. Mikey smiled at him and replied, “Yeah, of course. Why’d you ask?”

“You just, I don’t know, you just seem to keep zoning out a lot. Are you sure everything is alright?”

Mikey sighed. Now was probably the best time to tell him, Mikey thought.

“There’s... There’s something I wanna talk to you about.”

Pete moved away from Mikey and had a concerned look on his face, making Mikey feel shitty. He didn’t to upset Pete.

“What is it, Mikes?” Pete asked, trying to smile but failing. Fuck, this was going to be hard.

“I... I like Josh. Like, I have a crush on him.” Mikey stuttered out, not making eye contact with Pete.

Pete seemed to sigh in relief, which confused Mikey. He looked over at Pete questioningly and Pete said, “Shit, you scared me for a second. I thought you were like, breaking up with me or something. Wait, you aren’t breaking up with me, right?”

“No! Of course I’m not breaking up with you!” Mikey exclaimed, then added, “Wait, but do you really not care?”

“Nah, it’s kind of a relief actually.” Pete replied.

“Seriously? Why?”

Pete scratched the back of his neck awkwardly and mumbled, “I kinda like Josh too?”

Now Mikey was  _ really _ shocked. Out of all the possible outcomes of telling Pete, this was one he definitely didn’t think of. He thought the best case scenario was just Pete not caring, but Pete was actually in the same boat as him? This was fucking weird.

“Wait, what?” Was what Mikey said, though.

“Yeah, I mean, it’s a new development? But this is good! This is really good, actually. I felt so guilty and shitty for liking him too, so this is a huge relief.” Pete grinned, then nudged Mikey with his elbow and added, “Can’t believe we both fell for the same guy.”

Mikey laughed, “He is a really cute guy.”

“Can I just say... I fucking  _ love _ his smile.”

Mikey grinned and squeezed Pete’s hand, saying, “Fuck, he has such a nice smile!”

“I know!” Pete grinned back, “He just looks so cute and like, the way his eyes crinkle up? I live for that.”

“God, I love that. He’s seriously so cute.”

“Yeah, he really is.” Pete leaned his forehead against Mikey’s head and added, “I live for your smile too.”

Mikey smiled, then leaned in and kissed Pete softly. They stayed like that for a bit, kissing slowly and tuning out the sound of everyone else outside of their little bubble. Mikey was grateful that Pete had used his blankets to make a blanket fort now, this way they actually had a little privacy.  
  
Mikey fell asleep that night feeling happy and warm, excited for what the next day would bring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact: the stuff abt being moved into a closet bc there was too many babies is 100% true. that happened at a church i used to go to and sadly they did also accidentally give us moldy food
> 
> but again, feel free to comment/leave kudos bc they fuel me and hmu on Tumblr [(mlmbabcock)](http://mlmbabcock.tumblr.com/) and/or on Twitter [(Allegrcat)](https://twitter.com/Allegrcat) if u wanna chat okay ily guys


	19. Proverbs 20:29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hm, yeah, that’s true,” Gee grinned, “Finally can scratch something off my bucket list, though.”
> 
> “Which thing? Sucking a guy off or sucking a guy off at bible camp?”
> 
> “Well, both, but I was actually thinking ‘doing something sexual at bible camp.’”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello frens i hope u like it :-)
> 
> also bc im #terrible and Gay im gonna be going back to san francisco for another month in a couple weeks so yeaahhh it's not gonna affect the next chapter but probably the chapter _after_ the next chapter

Gee woke up that morning and was momentarily disoriented at their surroundings. This always passed after about five minutes of panic, though, so Gee was up and getting ready with everyone else shortly after this panic.

Gee was tiredly ignoring everyone who was rushing for the showers and immediately went downstairs to get a cup of coffee. That was one thing they couldn't live without: black coffee. They probably had drank so much that most of the water in their body had been replaced with coffee. It was the only constant in their life, and goddamn they were never giving it up.

The first taste of coffee on their tongue almost made them gag. Whoever made this coffee seriously needed to rethink their life choices, this was simply  _ awful _ . Of course, Gee would drink it anyway, but they were going to complain about it to anyone who would listen.

Thankfully, the one guy who would listen to Gee rant about the sanctity of coffee and how making it too weak was a sin against nature happened to also be heading over to where they were standing.

“Mornin’ Gee, how'd you sleep?” Frank asked, his voice slightly rough from having just woken up.

Gee shrugged, “Not the best, but also not the worst considering I, y’know, actually slept,” they took another sip of their coffee and involuntarily made a face, “This coffee is a huge disappointment, though. Whoever made this made it way too weak.”

“Damn, that's a shame. I was about to grab some for myself.”

“Just do what I do and ignore the taste and chug it as quickly as possible. Like this,” Gee gestured to their cup before downing half of it in one gulp. They swallowed and shivered in disgust, before grinning at Frank and saying, “Now it's your turn.”

Frank shook his head rapidly, “Nope, not my turn. You're ridiculous, can't believe my girlfriend is fucking crazy.”

There was a slight sinking feeling in Gee’s stomach at hearing Frank call them crazy, but they tried to laugh it off and just replied with, “I thought we established that I was crazy when I had a drunken breakdown at your house and confessed all my secrets to you.”

“Okay, you have a point there.” He wrapped an arm around Gee's waist and the two if then started to head outside where they were supposed to have their “private morning devotionals.” Obviously Gee never actually did that, they usually would just write random thoughts that popped into their head down or doodle in their bible. 

This year was better, though, since this year they just made out with Frank next to the stream. It was so nice, just sitting with Frank, the morning air cool but the rising sun promising a hot day; the sound of the stream mixing with the sound of the woods surrounding them. They were in a secluded enough area that Gee didn't even have to worry too much about someone finding the two of them, they were just in their suspended bubble of time where our was just the two of them, sitting on a boulder next to a stream and completely isolated from the rest of the world.

It almost felt like they were in a Monet painting- if Monet painted trans girls and queer guys making out behind a cabin where a bunch of Christians were having their morning devotionals.

When it was time for them to go inside for breakfast he was sufficiently in a good mood. They kept grinning at the ground and pointedly ignoring the knowing looks from Ray and Mikey. Nothing could stop them from feeling this good.

\----------

“Alright guys, time to gather around outside for dodgeball.” Gabe announced with a face splitting grin on his face. William was standing next to him, a mixture of annoyance and affection on his face as he shook his head at Gabe's excitement over dodgeball. 

Everyone who had already been to camp knew not to play dodgeball when Gabe was involved. Sadly, dodgeball was almost as enforced as the sermons- and also sadly Gabe was always involved- so Gee begrudgingly followed everyone else outside to the fields to play dodgeball. 

The one upside was no one ever wanted Gee on their team, which was completely fine by them. If no one wanted them, then they didn't want anyone either. Especially if no one wanted them to do a sports related thing.

“Okay guys, time to pick team captains.” Billie Joe Armstrong announced, making Gee groan internally and hope that they somehow skip over them.

“Gabe is going to be captain of team one,” Billie Joe Armstrong continued, “And William will be the captain of team two. Now line up, they're gonna pick team members now.”

Gee leaned over to whisper in Frank’s ear, saying, “Try to get on Gabe’s team.”

“Why?” Frank whispered back.

“Just trust me on this.”

Frank opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by Billie Joe Armstrong saying, “Gabe’s team will be number one and William’s team will be number two. Make sure you remember which number you get,” He started moving down the line, counting kids off in groups of two. Gee ended up getting on Gabe’s team (to their pleasure), but that meant that Frank got on William’s team.

Gee stared after Frank when the groups had moved to their sides of the field, wishing they were on the same team. Gabe came up next to them and put his hand on their shoulder, saying, “It’s like Romeo and Juliet.” 

Gee made a mental note that Gabe was looking at William, not Frank, when he said that.

The game started and Gee took up their usual role of just hiding behind everyone else and doing absolutely nothing to help their team. It’s not like they actually would help if they tried, they’d just get in the way. No reason to mess up their teammates. 

They did keep getting distracted watching Frank, though. He was just too fucking  _ attractive _ , goddammit. They wouldn’t be able to focus even if they wanted to.

The one upside was that watching him closely  _ did _ mean that Gee saw the exact moment the ball flew into his face.

The downside is that he just got hit in the face with a goddamn dodgeball. 

“Frank!” Gee called out, running over to make sure their boyfriend was okay. He was sitting on the ground, holding his nose in his hands and mumbling to himself incoherently. At least, incoherently from where Gee was standing. They weren’t close enough to hear what he was saying.

When they got closer, though, they could tell that he was just mumbling curses under his breath. William also had run over to him, probably trying to make sure he wasn’t too injured. Gabe looked guilty, but not too guilty. It was almost like he was expecting to accidentally hit the new kid in the face with a dodgeball.

Well, he  _ did _ usually hit someone in the face.

“Are you okay? Does anything feel broken?” William asked, fussing over Frank and trying to make sure he was okay.

“Nah, not broken. Just hurts like a motherfu- hurts a lot. Also it feels like there’s a lot of blood,” Frank replied, then added, “Is there a lot of blood?”

Gee nodded, “Yeah, there’s quite a bit of blood. Do you want me to help you clean it up?”

“Yeah, thanks, that’d be helpful.” Frank said, than let Gee and William help him up. William looked like he wanted to follow Frank and Gee inside, but then seemed to decide that they were okay going by themselves.

Gee lead Frank into the boy’s bathroom, guiding him with a hand on his back while Frank kept his hand on his nose, attempting to stop the bleeding. They got to the bathroom and Frank sat on the counter next to the sink, watching Gee gather a wad of toilet paper and putting it against his nose.

“So, uh, I guess now you have the full camp experience. Someone always gets hit in the face while we play dodgeball, I don’t know why they still even allow the game. Or why they let Gabe play anymore.” Gee said, trying to break the slightly awkward silence that had fallen on them.

“So this sorta thing happens a lot?” Frank asked, briefly lifting the toilet paper off his nose to speak.

Gee nodded, “Yup. Basically every summer, really. It’s practically a tradition at this point.”

Frank laughed and rolled his eyes, then cringed probably from pain. He pressed the toilet paper harder against his nose and said, “Glad to carry on the tradition.”

They fell into silence again, Gee just standing in front of Frank awkwardly, unsure of what to do. After a minute or two, Frank finally took the toilet paper off his nose and threw it into the garbage can, saying, “I think the bleeding’s stopped now. How do I look?”

Gee snorted, “You got blood all over your face, dude.”

“Seriously? Like, cool blood all over my face or weird blood all over my face?” Frank turned around so he was facing the mirror and made a disappointed sound, “Damnit, it’s weird blood all over my face.”

“We can just clean it up, than you won’t have  _ any _ blood on your face.”

“But where’s the fun in that?” Frank said with a grin.

“You’re a weirdo.”

“Says you.”

Gee laughed and Frank leaned for to kiss them on the nose, startling Gee slightly.

“What was that about?” Gee asked, scrunching up their nose slightly.

“Nothing, you’re just cute.”

“I’m not cute.”

Frank shook his head, “Lies.”

“I would say that you’re cute, but you’re currently covered in your own blood right now.”

“Are you saying I can’t be cute  _ and _ covered in my own blood?” Frank asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No, you can’t be. Although I think it’d be better if it wasn’t your own blood. Also if you were just completely covered in blood.”

“Ohh, so you wanna see me all Carrie-d out. Covered all over in blood? Although preferably it won’t be pigs blood. I would  _ not _ approve if you killed a pig just to satisfy your weird kinks.”

Gee laughed and shoved him slightly, making him fall back against the mirror with a grin, “I do not have weird kinks!”

“Hey, you were the one who mentioned wanting to see me covered in blood.”

“Oh shut up. I’d kiss you if you didn’t have blood all over your mouth.”

Frank smirked, “I think you’d kiss me anyway if you didn’t wanna seem weird.”

“You already think I’m weird, though.”

“Nah, I think you’re unique.”

Gee rolled their eyes, “Bullshit. Unique is just a word people use to describe other people when they have nothing better to say.”

“Is that so?”

“Yep. But really, you think I’m weird.”

“I’d only think you were weird if you kissed me right this second.”

“Fine.” Gee closed the gap between them and kissed Frank, moving forward so they were standing in between his legs. He wrapped his arms around their neck and pulled them closer, their bodies squished together in a way Gee probably would find uncomfortable if they weren’t distracted by kissing Frank.

Gee broke away after a while to catch their breath, laughing and saying, “Fuck, you taste like blood.”

Frank grinned widely, “Kinky.”

Gee giggled and rested their forehead on his, “We probably should get you cleaned up now, though. They might wonder what we’re doing.”

“Would they really notice if we don’t come back?”

Gee chewed on their lip thoughtfully, then smirked and said, “Probably not.”

Frank raised his eyebrow questioningly, “What’s that look about?”

Gee ran their hand up his thigh slowly and replied, “I never got to return the favor, remember? From that time at church.”

Frank’s breath hitched slightly and his eyes seemed to darken, “Are you sure you want to? Like, right now?”

Gee pulled their hand away, starting to feel like they messed up. They looked at the floor and mumbled, “I mean, if you want.”

“No, uh, yeah. Yeah I want, I just wanna make sure  _ you _ want.”

Gee looked back up at Frank, “Yeah, I want.”

“Should we clean up the blood first?” Frank asked.

“Nah, where’s the fun in that?” Gee replied, not really sure why they’re doing this. They do want to, obviously, but they aren’t sure why  _ now _ . What snapped in their head to make them suddenly want to suck Frank off while his nose is still fucked and anyone could walk in at any moment?

Wait, that was the reason. 

They were feeling oddly impulsive the past few days, and this just seemed like the best idea at the moment. It wasn’t even like they had been thinking about it more than usual or anything, but they just suddenly felt like they needed to do this.

Gee pulled Frank in for another kiss, this one deeper and more aggressive. Frank gasped softly against their mouth, which just urged them on. They gripped onto his hips tightly and started kissing along his jaw. He tilted his head back and let out soft noises, encouraging Gee to continue.

They broke away again to pull Frank off the counter, him sliding to the ground with a soft thud. Next thing Gee knew they were on autopilot, falling to their knees and undoing Frank’s jeans clumsily. 

They had no fucking idea what they were doing, but they just knew that they had to do this. Had to do something dumb and impulsive that could get them in a lot of trouble. They didn’t even know what the fuck to do, but they figured they must be doing something right from the sounds Frank was making.

Gee wasn’t even sure if they fully wanted to do this. Well, they definitely did, but it just was sort of uncomfortable. Wrong, or something. Like they were doing everything wrong but they didn’t want to stop.

Which was probably a good thing, since Frank didn’t seem to want Gee to stop either. Gee looked up at him to see that he was gripping the counter tightly with one hand, knuckles turning white, with his other hand fisted in his mouth.

Really Gee just felt proud of themselves for actually doing something, apparently, correct. That was actually surprising, considering they had literally no fucking idea what they were doing. 

They also didn’t realize how turned on they would get from sucking Frank’s dick. It shouldn’t be surprising, considering what turns them on, but it was still a bit unexpected. They thought it would be more of a concession; something they would do because they wanted to get Frank off, but they were happily surprised.

“Fuck, Gee,  _ fuck _ .” Frank moaned, then bit his lip to stay quiet. Gee felt a strange sense of pride at being able to do this to Frank and they wondered what took them so long to do this.

Well, other than dysphoria, crippling anxiety, and their ever present fear of failure, but those were just  _ minor _ inconveniences. 

Frank was panting softly above them and running his finger through their hair. They suddenly remembered that they hadn’t showered in roughly a month and their hair probably felt disgusting, but they just hoped he didn’t notice.

Even if Frank did notice, Gee didn’t think he minded. They were pretty sure he was too turned on to think about the fact that Gee was actually disgusting.

Well, they hoped that was the case.

“Fuck,” Frank groaned, “Fuck, Gee I’m gonna- I’m gonna come, Gee.”

Gee had absolutely no idea what they were supposed to do about this fact. They started panicking internally and debated with themselves about what they were supposed to do. While they had this inner battle about what the fuck they were supposed to do, Frank came down their throat while moaning their name

Well. 

That definitely was something.

Gee pulled off slowly, now feeling awkward and a bit embarrassed about what they just did. The moved away from Frank and sat completely on the floor, now drained and wanting to hide away from the world- Frank included.

Frank sat down in front of Gee and lifted their chin so they were making eye contact. He looked concerned and Gee felt guilty. They didn’t want him to feel bad about anything, he did nothing wrong. They were the fuck up here.

“Gee, are you okay? You look... I don’t know. Upset?” Frank asked, his eyes soft and stroking their cheek with his thumb slowly.

Gee shrugged and looked away from Frank, replying with, “I’m okay, don’t worry. Just, I don’t know, weird brain shit or something. Sorry, you can ignore me.”

Frank scoffed, “I’m not gonna ignore you.”

“Okay,” Gee tried smiling at Frank and, surprisingly, it wasn’t that difficult to. They leaned forward so their forehead was touching Frank’s and started laughing. 

Frank looked at them curiously but Gee just continued laughing. Frank quirked a smile at them and said, “What?”

Gee shook their head and replied, still giggling a bit, “I sucked your dick at bible camp. Unbelievable.”

Frank snorted, “It’s totally believable, babe.”

“Hm, yeah, that’s true,” Gee grinned, “Finally can scratch something off my bucket list, though.”

“Which thing? Sucking a guy off or sucking a guy off  _ at _ bible camp?”

“Well,  _ both _ , but I was actually thinking ‘doing something sexual at bible camp.’”

“You’re ridiculous,” Frank said, leaning forward to kiss Gee on the nose.

“Oh, c’mon. You try growing up in a Christian household and  _ not _ really want to do sexual things in churches or bible camps.”

“Well now you’ve done both, so good on you!” Frank said with a grin.

“Goddamn right I’ve done both.” Gee grinned back and high fived Frank. 

They both got quiet for a bit, Gee still feeling embarrassed about what just happened. But, instead of dwelling on it, they got up off the ground and said, “We probably should head back. Someone might get suspicious if we're gone for any longer, especially since we've already been gone for a while.”

Frank looked up at Gee, then followed their lead and got up too. He turned and looked in the mirror, laughing when he realized he still had blood all over his face.

“Fuck, I never properly cleaned myself up.”

Gee grinned, “Nope, I distracted you pretty well.”

Frank rolled his eyes, “Yeah, you can be very distracting if you want to be.”

“You don't even know the extent if it. You have just seen the top of the iceberg, my friend. Just you wait,” Gee said with a wink.

Frank had turned away from Gee and was wiping the blood of his face with a damp paper towel when he replied with, “I can't wait to see how distracting the entire iceberg can be.”

Gee wrapped their arms around Frank's waist from behind, “Trust me, you'll find out eventually.”

Frank threw the now dirty paper towel into the trashcan, then turned around so he was facing Gee and wrapped his arms around their neck, bringing them in for a kiss. They kissed for a bit, keeping it slow so nothing else happens.

A few minutes passed and Gee finally pulled completely away from Frank, saying, “We really should head back, Frankie.”

Frank sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, “Yeah, I know. Come on, let's go.”

Gee smiled at Frank and held his hand as they walked out of the bathroom, only letting go when they arrived back at the field where everyone else was.

\----------

They all were congregated in the sanctuary to play various games. Gee was sitting at the table playing Bull Shit with Frank, Pete, Mikey, Lynn, Patrick, Ray, Hayley, and Ashley. Gee was currently winning, as usual. If there was one thing they were actually good at it was Bull Shit.

Well, more specially it was lying.

“Bull shi- I mean BS!” Mikey called out right as Gee put down their cards.

“BS you say? Well, let's see…” Gee said, smirking as they flipped over the cards to reveal that they had not lied about putting down four queens.

“What the- how do you keep doing that?” Mikey asked, sounding exasperated, “How did you get so good at this game?”

Gee just responded by winking and making kissy faces in his direction.

“I’m pretty sure you're this youth groups undefeated BS champ.” Pete said, throwing down his cards in defeat.

“Awh, giving up already?” Gee asked, faking disappointment.

“Yep, you're no fun.”

“Did someone say ‘no fun?’” Gabe asked, suddenly coming up to the table while holding a box.

Gee looked at Gabe skeptically, “Yeah, he did. What's in the box, Gabe?”

A wicked grin spread across Gabe’s face and he dumped the box on the table while yelling, “Spoons!”

A groan came from around the room and Gee, Mikey, and Patrick all stood up. One game Gee avoided at all costs was Spoons. They had enough horror stories of that have from their first year at camp, and they weren't paving on making any more.

Frank, on the other hand, seemed enthusiastic about the game. He was currently staring Pete down as Gabe counted how many spoons they would need. Ray also had gotten up, just a bit more delayed than the others. Almost like he had considered playing until he realized who he was going up against. One look at Lynn's nails and every one in the room would know not to go up against her in spoons.

Gee grabbed the deck of cards and moved to sit on the floor with a sigh. They wanted to be as far away from that table as they could be before things got ugly. The others who had left the table followed suit and soon enough they had a new game of Bull Shit up and running.

Now, though, they were interrupted every once in a while by a loud commotion from the corner of the room. Fucking Spoons, always ruining everything. They were pretty sure they just heard Frank yelling something about “payback for dodgeball,” followed by Gabe laughing hysterically and yelling, “I want you on my team next year!”

Seems Gabe is seeing the appeal of Frank now.

After a while the BS game got bigger, now Ryan, Spencer, Nate, and Debby playing. Nate had basically the entire deck, making it difficult for anyone else to get away with cheating. Finally everyone surrendered to Nate, just wanting him to stop yelling “BS” the minute anyone did anything.

Gee noticed Ryland coming in, but didn't put too much thought into it. Of course he'd be in there, basically everyone was. What did catch Gee’s attention was the fact that he seemed to be counting every person in the room. Gee didn't know why, but they felt like something intense was about to happen.

Ryland walked over to the Bull Shit circle and sat down in between Ryan and Spencer. Ryland leaned his head on his hand and looked at Ryan, then asked, “You think we could get enough people to play Silent Football with us?”

Ryan’s eyes seemed to bug out of his skull and he got up, scrambling away from Ryland and saying, “Oh hell no! I'm not playing that hell game!”

“Oh come on! It's not that bad! Plus it might be more fun with this many people!” 

Gabe seemed to be interested in what Ryland was saying, so he put down his spoon and walked over to the circle, asking, “What’s this you're talking about? Sounds fun, whatever it is.”

“It's not fun, it's the worst!” Ryan replied, practically spitting out the words.

Ryland rolled his eyes, “Ryan’s just being dramatic, plus he doesn't even have to play! We definitely are gonna play this, though. I can’t pass up an opportunity this good.”

“Please, I'm intrigued, tell me more.” Gabe said with a grin slowly spreading across his face.

“Okay so-” Ryland started, then seemed to think better of it, “Actually, give me a few minutes. I need time to prepare so things. While I'm doing my things, get everyone who's willing to play to sit in a circle. I'll be back in a few minutes.”

Gabe nodded and started getting everyone to sit in a circle as Ryland stood up and left the room. Ryan was trying to get Spencer to leave with him, but Spencer refused.

“No, I wanna play! I'm curious as to what it’s like with this many people.” Spencer said as Ryan tugged on his shirt.

“But everyone else is playing and I don't wanna sit alone!” Ryan grumbled.

Brendon stood up and smiled shyly at Ryan, “I can sit with you.”

Ryan blushed and stuttered out, “O-okay, but only if you  _ really _ want to.”

“Yeah, I want to.” Brendon grabbed Ryan's arm and pulled him to the- now empty- corner where the table was. They sat next to each other and Gee had to admit that they would be a cute couple, if they both just got over their fear that the other didn't like them in that way.

Not that Gee could talk, they were the queen of thinking no one actually liked them. That was another talent of theirs, actually.

It had been a few minutes and Ryland  still hadn't come back, so Jon decided to keep everyone busy by doing some calming exercises. 

“I want everyone to close their eyes,” he said calmly, his voice comforting but loud so everyone could hear, “Now, picture this: you're in a meadow. Try to picture this in as much detail as possible. What sort of grass is there? Is it long or short? Are there flowers? If so, what type? How many flowers? Are there any bees?

“Once you've thought through every aspect of your mind meadow,” Jon continued, “I want you to picture a horse. Is it a large horse? What color is its mane? Does it look wild or tamed? What do you think its purpose is-” 

Jon was interrupted by a loud screech emitting from the doorway. Ryland  came charging into the circle, startling everyone who had had their eyes closed- which was every person in the room. He had his shirt unbuttoned all the way- but still tucked into his pants- and what looked like glitter glue spread all over his chest

“I am the Mister Commissioner Missioner,” he announced, using a terrible English accent for no apparent reason, “And I am your  _ God _ .”

Suddenly it was apparent why Ryan was so against playing this game.

\----------

Out of all the years Gee had spent going to bible camps and youth group, nothing could prepare them for how terrifyingly hilarious Silent Football was. It was one of the strangest, most confusing games they had ever played, and they absolutely  _ loved it _ . 

It was a shame, actually, that it had taken that long for someone to introduce that to Gee, because that was something they wish they had known about years ago. It was the perfect mix of chaos and too many rules that balanced out to be perfection, and a two hour game didn't seem like enough.

Nate also had gotten too into it, and he now was mocking Debby for fwop fwopping a fwop fwop.

“I just don't know how that was possible! I thought fwopping a fwop fwop was bad, but how did you manage  _ that _ ?” he said for what seemed like the hundredth time, still just as flabbergasted as the first time he said it.

“I don't know! I wasn't really thinking it through!”

“But it just send so  _ obvious _ .” They probably contained with their conversation, but Gee had lost interest. There was more interesting things happening at the moment, mainly that it seemed like both Mikey and Pete were flirting with Josh. At the same time.

The three boys were sitting in a tight circle and Pete had his hand on Josh's knee while Mikey played with Josh's hair. They were being so obvious about their flirtation, but it made no sense to Gee. They reminded themselves mentally to ask Mikey about it later.

Frank came over to Gee and snapped them or of their thoughts by saying, “Well that have was fucking weird. Remind me to never play that game ever again.”

“What? I thought it was fun!” Gee said as they started walking out of the sanctuary and towards the boys sleeping area.

“Seriously? It was scary! I understand why Ryan hates it so much.”

“It was only scary for you because you kept testing the Mister Commissioner Missioner’s patience.”

Frank snorted, “You mean Ryland’s patience?”

“Whatever, same thing.”

Frank laughed and wrapped his arm around Gee’s waste. They bristled slightly, afraid that this might be much PDA, even though they were both “guys” and no one would think of it too much.

Although these youth groups did have the habit of being very not straight, so they might pay more attention to this sort of thing. 

Gee didn't want Frank to get mad at them, though. So they just waited for a natural time to pull away, which happened to be right as they walked up to Gabe. He looked between the two of them, obviously having seen how much they were touching just moments before. He didn't seem to care, though, because he just smiled and said, “You guys going to bed?”

Gee nodded, “Yeah, it's been a long day and I'm ready to pass out.”

“Understandable. Game day is always the most tiring,” He turned to address Frank, “Sorry about earlier, by the way. Don't know if I ever got in a proper apology.”

Frank shrugged and waved him off, “It’s fine, I've had worse.”

Gabe laughed, “And I've done worse. But goodnight you two, been nice chatting. I gotta talk to Bill about something, though.”

“What about?” Gee asked.

“Eh just some boring leader stuff. We still gotta figure or who's driving when we go mountain climbing. Intense stuff, as you would probably guess.”

“Well, have fun with that. See you tomorrow, Gabe.”

“See you tomorrow, too.” Gabe smiles at Gee, then walked past them and down the hallway. 

Gee and Frank got to their bunks and, even though there were way too many people around, Gee just really wanted to kiss Frank. A dumb idea that they wouldn't act on, of course, but that didn't take away the fact that they still really wanted to do it.

Instead, they hugged Frank and mumbled “goodnight” into his ear before climbing into their bunk and pretending to fall asleep. They never fell asleep at the same time everyone rise did, no, that'd be too easy. It took them usually an hour or more for them to actually get to bed, no matter how tired they were.

They ended up falling asleep earlier than usual, but that still knew they would be completely exhausted and momentarily disoriented in the morning.

Rinse and repeat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feel free to comment/leave kudos bc they fuel me and hmu on Tumblr [(mlmbabcock)](http://mlmbabcock.tumblr.com/) and/or on Twitter [(Allegrcat)](https://twitter.com/Allegrcat) if u wanna chat okay ily guys


	20. Job 38:3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Wait,” Pete started, looking at Gee weirdly, “You want to help your brother and your brother's boyfriend get another completely new boyfriend? Aren't you supposed to be the responsible brother?”
> 
> Gee shrugged, “It's not irresponsible if everyone is okay with more than two people in the relationship. Just make sure everyone is always okay with it and talk to your partners every once in a while to make sure no boundaries have been crossed. Which, to be honest, should be things done in relationships anyway but whatever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys its me again i actually am writing at a fast rate nowadays which is weird but anyway enjoy nachos, pizza, and other triangular things :*

Mikey did not know what to expect from this year’s Guys Night. The previous years had been some of the most chaotic, surreal events Mikey has ever experienced and he was excited for what would happen this year.

Last year they had gone to an ice cave and it had been quite a bonding experience. Mostly because they all had to get basically naked and huddle together while in below freezing water and hope to god they didn’t all die.

It had been a very intense day for them all.

This year, though, the leaders had said it wasn’t gonna be as extreme as that. Mostly because apparently Nate had told his parents what had happened and they immediately got in touch with the leaders and told them that if they did something that extreme again they would sue.

It wasn't even that bad, Nate’s parents were just very overprotective of him. 

Plus, after that they basically did nothing but sit in the guys room and play Truth or Dare, thus leading to the Hot Sauce Incident that will follow Josh for the rest of his life.

It still probably was a good thing- Mikey didn't think he could survive one more ice cave.

Mikey was sitting in the dining hall with Josh and Pete; they all were taking about possible things that could happen that night- Pete was insisting the woods were gonna be involved in some way. Mikey wasn't convinced.

“I'm telling you, I heard Dallon talking to Jon about setting things up in the forest! We’re definitely going out there tonight.” Pete exclaimed, sliding his hand on his thigh repeatedly for emphasis.

“When was this conversation exactly?” Mikey asked, sounding suspicious.

“This morning at breakfast. They were in line behind me.”

Josh sighed and leaned his head on the table, “Why do they always make us go out and do active shit outside? Can't we have a night in like what the girls always do? I just want to rest.”

Lynn came up to the table and say next to Josh, “Probably because they're stuck in their gender roles that boys wanna go out and do manly shit while girls just wanna sit inside and eat cookies and gossip.”

“Please let me switch places with you,” Josh said, looking at Lynn with pleading eyes, “I wanna gossip and eat cookies.”

Now Mikey was the one to sigh, “Fuck, I want that to. Petition for is to just not do anything but that for guys night this year.”

“And then girls get to throw tomahawks at trees and have a bonfire? Fuck yeah I'm on board! How do we get them to switch the places?” Lynn asked, a gleam in her eye.

“Wait, what the fuck! How do you know what we're doing tonight?” Mikey asked, looking shocked.

Lynn shrugged, “I was talking to Breezy about it.”

“She told you?”

“Yeah, of course she did,” Lynn said with a confused expression on her face, “Do the male leaders not talk to you about this sort of thing?”

Pete snorted, “Have you meet the male leaders? They’re all assholes.”

Lynn laughed, “You have a point there.”

“Mikey, hey, can I talk to you?” Gee asked from the doorway. Mikey cocked his head in confusion, but walked over to his sibling anyway.

“What is it?” Mikey asked when he got close to Gee.

“So,” Gee started, “What’s up with you and Pete?”

Now Mikey was even more confused. As far as he knew, everything was the same with Pete- and that's exactly what he told Gee.

Gee looked exasperated and put their hands on their hips, looking like the older sibling Mikey always remembered. Nowadays they seemed to have enough trouble with their own business to snoop in Mikey's life.

“I'm talking about whatever's happening with you two and Josh!” Before Mikey could say anything, Gee added, “Don't think I didn't notice! I might be unobservant and caught up in my thoughts most of the time, but even I didn't miss this. You guys are totally flirting with Josh constantly and I wanna know what your plan is with that.”

Mikey was pretty sure he was gaping at Gee stupidly. Had they really been that obvious about their thing with Josh? If you could even call it a thing- it was more like a couple crush. A couple that had a mutual crush on the same cute boy. A cute boy who had bright red hair and played the drums and had the cutest smile and-

Gee was snapping their fingers in Mikey's face, saying, “Pay attention to me! What's the plan with Josh? Are you guys gonna try to date him at the same time? Or are you guys just gonna flirt with him forever? Also do you want my help with anything because I can totally help if-” 

“Oh my god, stop talking,” Mikey said with a laugh, “I'll explain everything, okay?”

Gee beamed at Mikey, “Awesome!”

“I just- let me get Pete. He can help.”

\----------

“Wait,” Pete started, looking at Gee weirdly, “You want to help your brother and your brother's boyfriend get another completely new boyfriend? Aren't you supposed to be the responsible brother?”

Gee shrugged, “It's not irresponsible if everyone is okay with more than two people in the relationship. Just make sure everyone is always okay with it and talk to your partners every once in a while to make sure no boundaries have been crossed. Which, to be honest, should be things done in relationships anyway but whatever.”

Pete’s eyes were big when he looked over to Mikey, “When did Gerard get so relationship savvy?”

 “Maybe all these years of being alone somehow made him amazing at relationships.”

 “Are we all forgetting that shut the fuck up this isn't about my relationship history, fuck you.”

 Mikey patted Gee’s shoulder, “It's okay, we already know that you got your first boyfriend at eighteen.”

 “Actually I was technically still seventeen.”

 “I don't think that's better? Considering Mikey’s fifteen and he has a boyfriend already.”

 Gee groaned and covered their face with their hands, “We get it, I'm a loser and a loner. Can we get back to the subject at hand? Aka what we should do about the Josh situation? Does he even like guys?”

 “Yeah, he likes guys. He told us a while ago, but told some more people when we first got here,” Mikey replied, then added, “Where you not there? I swore you were there.”

 Gee shrugged, “If I was there I don't remember, but that's not important. What are you gonna do? Just be upfront about it or…?”

 Mikey looked at Pete desperately, only to see that Pete was giving him the same look. Turned out neither of them had any fucking clue what they were doing- both of them having planned to do whatever the other wanted to do.

 “Oh my god, you guys have no idea what the hell you're doing. Unbelievable.” Gee said, rolling their eyes.

 “We were, uh, gonna come up with a plan? Eventually?” 

 “Yeah,” Pete agreed, “eventually.”

 “Why don't you guys try being more upfront about your feelings tonight? Y’know, guys night, where we go in a- usually- secluded area then get half naked and do stupid shit? It's the perfect time to do gay shit; as well as the stupid shit, obviously.”

 Mikey had to admit that it was a good idea, especially considering he had thought of absolutely nothing to actually get Josh. Mostly because he had been too distracted by how cute Josh was.

 “So, what?” Pete asked, “We just go up to him and say ‘hi Josh, Mikey and I really like you in a not so platonic way. You wanna date two boys at the same time even though you just realized you are even attracted to guys?’ I think we have to think it through more than that.”

 Gee shrugged, “Just don't word it like that.”

 “And how exactly are we supposed to word it?”

 Gee pushed their hair behind their ears and slapped their knee in frustration, “I don't know! You know I'm not the person to ask about wording things in the ways that are correct.”

 “Did you- did you do that on purpose?” Mikey asked with a laugh.

 Gee tilted their head in confusion, “Do what?”

 “You- never mind. But, I guess the rest is up to me and Pete?”

 “I can help later if you need!”

 Pete patted Gee’s head, “It’s okay, we can take it from here.”

 “You sure?”

 “Yeah, we're sure. Thanks for talking to us, Gee.” Mikey got up and pulled Pete with him, wanting to talk to him in more depth about the Josh situation- without Gee, though.

 Mikey and Pete walked into the bathroom, only to immediately regret that decision since Tyler was standing by the sink. He didn't seem to notice the two of them at first, so Mikey thought they might be able to get away without Tyler being a shit. 

 Except Pete accidentally elbowed Mikey in the stomach, making him grunt in discomfort and Tyler turn around to look at them. The three boys stared at each other silently for a few seconds, before Tyler finally broke the silence by asking, “What are you two doing?”

 Pete looked panicky, but he just leaned against the doorway casually and replied, “Peeing- y’know, normal bathroom activities.”

 “And you just had to come in here with Mikey?” Tyler practically spat out Mikey's name, making him flinch. He wasn’t scared of Tyler, it just hurt to hear him talk about him with so much hate. They were friends once upon a time, and it felt very bad to have Tyler dislike him over something so harmless.

 “What? Girls go to the bathroom in groups all the time!”

 “You guys aren't girls, though. So, what are you doing? We all know that you guys didn't stop dating, even though you should have. You two are wrong on so many levels.”

 “Awh, thanks!” Pete grinned, obviously trying to get under Tyler's skin, “No points for originality, though. I've heard it all before.”

 “God, you're so annoying. Would you fags just stop doing things with the youth group? I don't like being around you two.”

 “Funny, because I don't like being around a raging homophobe, but you don't see me trying to kick you out.” Mikey snapped.

 “That's because you have no right to kick me out! I'm not a dirty sinner like you two!”

 “Have you even heard the Golden Rule?” Tyler scoffed, but Mikey continued, ignoring him completely, “Because I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want to be treated the same way you're treating us.”

 Tyler rolled his eyes, “Whatever, I'll tell Dallon what you two have been doing.”

 “And what exactly have we been doing?” Pete asked, then added, “Because last time I checked, you have no proof of us even still being together! You just think us standing next to each other is a nasty homosexual act, right? But to Dallon that's just normal, so you have no way to get us in trouble.”

Tyler glared at Pete for a second before storming out of the bathroom, shoving Pete roughly against the wall as he passed him. Once he was completely gone, Mikey rushed closer to Pete and said, “Are you okay?”

 Pete nodded, “Yeah, not like Tyler is that strong. Fuck, we came in here to discuss how we're gonna ask Josh to date the two of us and ended up fighting with Tyler. This is just ridiculous.”

 “We still have to figure that out, though.”

 Pete sat on the counter next to the sink and swung his legs, “Y’know, before we ran into Tyler, I was super into Josh. Now that Tyler was being a gross homophobic prick, I'm extra into Josh. My pettiness has increased my attraction level to Josh, just to spite Tyler.”

 “Same,” Mikey leaned up against the wall opposite Pete, “How should we approach Josh about this, though? Should we follow Gee’s advice and just be blunt? Well, nice, non-threatening bluntness.”

 “That honestly is the best option, probably. Just put our cards on the table, show him everything we got, and hope to God that he likes us back.”

 “I think the ‘us’ thing is gonna be the hardest part of it all.”

 Pete sighed and stopped swinging his legs, “Yeah, you're probably right.”

 ----------

 Turned out Lynn was right, the guys night plans were just to throw tomahawks at trees in the middle of the forest. It was actually pretty fun though- it wasn't just the tomahawks, there was also a bonfire and s’mores for everyone, so Mikey was pleased.

 He was sitting next to Spencer and Ryan, the three of them watching Pete and Brendon be complete idiots with the tomahawks. Mikey looked over at Ryan to see him stare lovingly in Brendon’s direction. He laughed and nudged Ryan with his elbow, “When are you find finally go for it?”

 Ryan blushed profusely and looked at the ground, “I don't know what you are talking about.”

 “You know fully well what I'm talking about, dude.” 

 Ryan sighed, “Fine, whatever. It's not gonna happen any time soon, though. I'm too scared to say anything.”

 Mikey looked at where Josh was standing next to Nate and said, “Yeah, I get that.”

 “At least you already have your boy, I'm still in the pining stage.”

 “Yeah, that's true,” Mikey sighed and turned his attention back to Pete. Now Frank was standing with him- Brendon had got a tomahawk stuck in a tree and the three of them were trying to pull it out.

 “I'm gonna grab some more marshmallows.” Spencer announced and was about to get up, when Gabe held up two empty marshmallow bags and said, “Sorry, we’re all out of marshmallows.”

 “Oh, really?” Spencer said with disappointment in his tone, then sat back down next to Mikey.

 William stood up and took the empty bags from Gabe, saying, “It's okay, there's more back at the lodge. I'll go get some more.”

 Gabe got up too and stood next to William, “It's getting dark, I'll come with you.”

 William laughed, “It's okay, Gabe, I'm a big boy. I can do this myself.”

 Gabe rubbed the back of his neck nervously and responded with, “C’mon, just let me come with you.”

 William bit his lip and nodded, then quickly took off in the direction of the lodge- Gabe following close behind. Mikey was pretty sure he saw William blushing, but it could've just been the light from the bonfire. 

 He didn't put too much thought into that, though. Mostly because he was distracted by Frank coming over to the bonfire and saying, “Y’know, this ‘guys night’ thing is the most hyper-masculine, straight thing I have ever been to my whole life. I'm honestly amazed like ‘oh we’re men we like throwing tomahawks in the great outdoors look at us.’”

 Ray walked over to Frank, laughing and shaking his head, “Oh, Frankie boy, you are so mislead. Guys night might seem hyper-masculine to you, but that's just because you came at a wrong time. If you were here last year you would realize that that isn't true.”

 Freak cocked his head in confusion, “What happened last year?”

 Ray threw his arm around Frank’s shoulder, “We all had to huddle together while half naked and in freezing water. Then, when we got back to the lodge, we played a nice gave off Truth or Dare where Josh had to-”

 “Okay! That's enough storytelling for now, don't ya think?” Josh interrupted, sending death looks at Ray- who just returned them with a grin.

 “Wait!” Gee said loudly, “We should for storytelling! It'd be fun! Like, ghost stories and stuff. I mean, we're alone in the middle of the woods with no adult supervision-”

 “Uhm, Gerard, both me and Jon are here, and William and Gabe are gonna be right back.” Dallon pointed out.

 “-With a little bit of adult supervision. But anyway, it's the perfect ghost story situation!”

 Everyone else seemed to agree, so they all gathered around the fire and started telling the creepiest stories they could think of. 

 Gee went first, going for the good old fashioned typical ghost story. A man killed his wife, buried her in the backyard, and now she had come back to seek revenge. After about five minutes of Gee telling the story, Mikey realized they were just retelling the song Lovesick Zombie but in a creepier way. 

 They went through the circle, each person trying to one up the last. Eventually it got to Tyler, who just seemed dead set on being the douchiest person Mikey had ever met. His story was about two boys who were caught doing “sinful things”- Tyler’s words- to each other. Then God became angry yadda yadda Mikey stored paying attention after he realized Tyler was just trying to make him feel guilty about dating Pete. 

 Mikey got what Pete had said earlier, pettiness really does make attraction to certain people more intense.

 Mikey looked at Josh and smiled to himself.

 ----------

 Pete and Mikey were sitting in the dining hall, waiting for Josh to arrive. They had told him before the sermon to meet them there because they wanted to talk about something. Little did Josh know, that something was that they both wanted to date him at the same time.

 Pete was sitting on one of the tables, swinging his legs back and forth, while Mikey paced impatiently in front of him. He was chewing on his bottom lip nervously, suddenly terrified now that they were actually gonna go for this. Were they being idiots? What if Josh freaked out and started hating them because of this? What if he rejected them? God, things would be so weird if they asked him out and he said no. Mikey would be to embarrassed to hang out with Josh ever again.

 Mikey turned to Pete and was about to ask him if they were making a mistake, when Josh walked in with his hands in his pockets and smiling at the two of them. Mikey went completely still and Pete hopped off the table and smiled back at Josh, saying, “Hey, man.”

 Josh waved at them both, then put his hand back in his pocket and said, “Hey, what's up? You said you wanted to talk to me about something?”

 Mikey couldn't look at Josh, so he just stared at Pete with a panicked expression. Pete squeezed his shoulder comfortingly, then turned to Josh and replied, “Well, it's sorta weird, to be honest, so promise not to freak out.”

 Josh was looking between Pete and Mikey, confusion all over his face. He tried to hide it, though, saying, “I promise not to freak out. Although, I gotta admit, I am a bit scared now. Is this like, a serious thing or…?”

 Pete shrugged and bit his lip, “I guess it's sorta serious?”

 This seemed to really scare Josh, who now looked very concerned, “What is it? Like, bad serious? C’mon Pete, just tell me.”

 Pete looked at Mikey- who was still too nervous to look at Josh- and rushed out, “Mikey and I both really like you a lot and we wanna date you. Maybe. Like, all three of us dating at the same time.”

 Mikey thought he might die, he was so terrified of how Josh would react. He quickly looked up from the floor to see Josh's facial expression, but was met Josh just looking incredibly confused.

 “Aren’t you guys, uhm,” Josh started after a few moments of silence, “Y’know. Already dating? Like, each other?”

 Mikey nodded slowly, “Uh, yeah? But we uhm…”

 “We wanna date you too?” Pete finished for Mikey.

 Josh crossed his arms and chewed on his lip silently. Mikey and Pete kept looking between each other and Josh, waiting in fear for what he was going to say.

 “How would this work? Like, dates and shit?” Was what Josh finally said.

 Pete laughed in, what Mikey thought was, relief, “We don't know, to be honest. We're kinda planning on winging it.”

 Josh rolled his eyes, “Yeah, that seems about right. I'm assuming you probably winged this whole thing too, right?”

 “Planned it all about an hour ago.” Mikey said, nodding his head in agreement.

 “Yep, figures. But uh, I guess?”

 Pete perked up, “You guess what?”

 “I guess we can try this thing? Because, okay don't laugh but…. I sorta have had a crush on both of you for a while? I want gonna do anything, though, since you two are dating. But, I guess it just means things are working out nicely?”

 Mikey was pretty sure he was grinning like an idiot but he didn't care. He walked over to Josh and hugged him tightly, saying, “Yeah, things worked out nicely.”

 Pete yelled, “Group hug!” then joined Mikey and Josh's hug. Josh giggled and said, “Is this what three people dating always gonna be like?”

 “Yep!” Pete replied, then kissed Mikey and Josh on the cheek.

 “Can't wait to see what making out is like,” Josh said with a laugh.

 “Well, we can see?” Mikey said.

 Josh bit his lip, “What do you mean?”

 Mikey started leaning down to kiss Josh, when Pete interrupted, “Why do you get to kiss Josh first?”

 “Because I'm taller than you,” Mikey mumbled in reply, before closing the gap between him and Josh, kissing him softly. Josh seemed hesitant at first, but then reciprocated eagerly once the surprise wore off. Pete made an annoyed sound next to them and Mikey flipped him off while still kissing Josh.

 After a little bit, Josh pulled away and muttered, “Pete’s turn,” before turning toward Pete and kissing him deeply. It was weird watching Pete and Josh kiss, but a good weird. The sort of weird Mikey could definitely get used to. 

 After another minute or so, Mikey realized that they still were, in fact, in the middle of the dining hall. He tapped Pete's shoulder and said, “We probably should go somewhere more private.”

 ----------

 Turned out having three teenage boys in a relationship makes making out in secluded closets pretty difficult. Mostly because they all simultaneously wanted to kiss the other two at the same time. Sloppy was an understatement, but it was the closest word Mikey could think of.

 Eventually they all just started laughing, which would have been fine and all if they weren't supposed to be asleep. Gabe found them and seemed surprisingly chill about finding three boys in a very small closet together- two of said boys having been caught making out another time. 

 Gabe lead the three of them back to the guys sleeping area and said, “Go to bed now and you won't get in trouble.”

 They didn't go to their individual bunks, though. They all hid in Pete’s blanket fort and tried to figure out how to do the “three person make out session” thing again. It was still clumsy and awkward, but after enough practice Mikey was pretty sure they would figure it out.

 And Mikey was definitely okay with having to practice it a lot.

 He was very okay with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always feel free to comment/leave kudos and hmu on Tumblr [(mlmbabcock)](http://mlmbabcock.tumblr.com/) and/or on Twitter [(Allegrcat)](https://twitter.com/Allegrcat) if u wanna chat okay goodbye frends


	21. 1 Corinthians 14:20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gee sat on their bed, watching everyone else scramble to get ready. They, as always, did not care if they were prepared. Their disinterest in the outdoors clashed greatly with everyone else, apparently, since everyone else was gung ho about this trip.
> 
> God, Gee needed new friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to update! I was planning on updating before I went to SF but I wasn't able to and then when I got to SF I just didn't have the time until now
> 
> I hope I didn't lose y'alls interest!! Enjoy the chapter!!!
> 
> Also tell me if theres any typos bc I wrote this on mobile so its easier to miss things !

Gee woke up feeling too drained to get up. They were already wishing they were back at home, wishing to be alone. They got ready that morning on autopilot, too exhausted- both physically and mentally- to actually pay attention to their surroundings.

Everyone was getting ready for the groups mountain climbing trip, but Gee was just loathing it. They didn't want to think about the fact that they were going to be stuck in the sun all day climbing a goddamn mountain. It was inhumane and cruel. Who the fuck actually enjoyed this sort of thing?

Mikey's boyfriend(s? Gee still didn't know if things went well with Josh. They'd have to ask Mikey later) did, apparently. Well, it seemed to Gee that they did, since both Pete and Josh seemed pumped for the day.

Gee sat on their bed, watching everyone else scramble to get ready. They, as always, did not care if they were prepared. Their disinterest in the outdoors clashed greatly with everyone else, apparently, since everyone else was gung ho about this trip.

God, Gee needed new friends.

Mikey came over to Gee and sat down beside them, fiddling with his hands and smiling at Pete and Josh. Gee looked at him curiously and asked, “You want something?”

“I- I need socks,” Mikey replied, looking embarrassed.

“You need  _what_?”

“Socks. I- uhm, I kinda forgot to pack them? So I’ve been wearing the same pair all week but, uh, since we’re going to climb a mountain I figured I probably should get some from you.”

Gee started laughing and shook their head, but pointed Mikey in the direction of their bag and replied, “Yeah, sure, go wild. Why didn’t you ask earlier in the week? I probably bought like, too many socks.”

Mikey shrugged and started going through Gee’s bag, “Don’t know, I was embarrassed? Didn’t want you to know that I forgot to pack socks.”

“You’re ridiculous, you should’ve just asked. Last year I literally forgot to bring my bag, remember? I’m the queen of forgetting things and embarrassing myself at camp.”

“I know, I know. You don’t have to remind me,” Mikey laughed, then put his socks on and was about to get up when Gee stopped him, saying, “Wait, before you go, what happened last night? With Josh, I mean.”

Mikey blushed and was about to reply when Dallon walked in and announced that they were leaving in five minutes. Mikey quickly said, “I'll tell you later,” then got up and went back over to Pete and Josh.

Gee was pretty sure, from the way the three boys were acting, that things had gone well.

\----------

Gee was too tired for the day, too tired to climb a goddamn mountain. But, of course, they  _had_   to climb the mountain, because “ _everyone_ climbing the mountain, Gerard.” At least they could get away with snuggling up to Frank in the bus and just pretend that it was because they were napping. Which, well, was actually what was happening, but they could get away with being a little more handsy than most people napping

Definitely helped that they were sitting near William, Gabe, and Ray on the bus.

What Gee wanted to do was pull Mikey aside and ask him what had happened with Josh, but so far they hadn’t been able to get him alone. But, from the way he was acting with Josh, Gee assumed it went well.

Pete, Mikey, and Josh were sitting a few rows in front of Gee and the three of them were being, well, to put it lightly, touchy feely. Josh was leaning over Mikey to force feed Pete a cookie while Mikey laughed up a storm. Gee didn't even want to know what Tyler thought of this very obvious PDA- but, then again, Gee tried to ignore Tyler as much as they possibly could.

No one else seemed to realize that what Pete, Mikey, and Josh were doing was  _incredibly_ gay. Gee was actually surprised that the leaders were letting it slide, considering two out of the three boys are known for being not straight.

Maybe the leaders were just trying to block out the fact that they had they least straight youth group on the east coast.

Or, considering William has a badly covered up hickey on his neck and neither Breezy nor Vicky are likely to have put it there, the leaders are too gay to care.

They arrived at the mountain after a not too long drive. Everyone filed out of the bus, Gee being one of the last people to leave.

The sun was shining and it was uncomfortably hot, Gee already miserable. They were going to die, that was obvious. How could anyone actually enjoy weather like this?

They voiced their opinions to Frank, who just shrugged and said, “I don't really get it either, but you aren't gonna die, Gee. Just stay hydrated and you'll be mostly fine.”

Gee sighed and looked up at the sky. At least the sky wasn't completely clear, but even those clouds wouldn't do much. Frank was right, though, they just had to drink a lot of water and they'd be mostly okay- they would just be very uncomfortable.

They still wanted to talk to Mikey, but they both were surrounded by other people. Gee chewed their lip and tried to think of a way to get Mikey alone. They could always just walk over and talk in metaphors, only saying things that Mikey would get the real meanings of. But, they were too tired for that, so they just walked over to Mikey and dragged him to the back of the group where not as many people were.

Mikey was giving Gee a weird look, so they explained, “Wanna know what happened last night with Josh.”

“Oh! I- uhm, sorry. I mean  _we_ \- Pete and I- talked to Josh and well…. let's just say it went well,” Mikey stuttered out, a slight blush creeping onto his cheeks.

Gee grinned, “Went well on what way? C’mon, Mikey, tell me the details.”

Mikey rolled his eyes, but he was still blushing when he replied, “Ugh, fine. We… we're dating now. All three of us. We don't- we don't really know what we're doing but I don't think any of us ever know what we're doing, so it works out. I… I really like them both, Gee.”

Gee wrapped their arm around Mikey's shoulders, grinning even wider than before, “I knew it. I knew you guys have been acting more couple-y with Josh. Congrats, Mikes, I'm happy for you.”

“I'm happy for me, too,” Mikey grinned, then added, “Happy I got two boyfriends at the same time way younger then you got your first.”

“I take back my congratulations.”

“Too late, you already said it.”

Gee shoved Mikey and rolled their eyes, “You're an idiot.”

“Still got two boyfriends when it took you 18 years to get one.”

“We get it, you have a superior boyfriend collection to me, no need to rub it in.”

“Nah, I think I'll continue to rub it in,” Mikey said, grinning cheekily.

“You're the worst, Mikey.”

“Oh, I know,” Mikey replied with a wink, then ran back over to where Pete and Josh were. Gee watched the three of them and shook their head. The three boys were still in that honeymoon stage, that bubble of affection still bright and new to them. Gee just hoped it didn't get shattered the same way Mikey and  Pete’s honeymoon phase was shattered. They deserved better than that.

Gee noticed the group pass a sign stating that no one was permitted past that point without climbing gear. Mikey and Gee shared a look, but figured they should continue on since the group wasn't stopping.

 _Even if they didn't have any equipment, it probably would be fine,_ Gee told themselves, purposefully ignoring the sign saying that 15 people had died because they didn't use the proper equipment.

If their youth group did anything well, it would be ignoring safety precautions.

The sun was beating down on Gee, making them overwhelmed and sweaty. It didn't help that they had been growing their hair out, it now falling to their shoulders and making them way too hot.

Gee jogged to the front of the group where Hayley and Jenna were, then asked Hayley, “Hey, do you have a hair tie? My hair is too long for this heat.”

Hayley laughed and gave them a hair tie, “I know exactly what you mean, this heat is killing me. I just wanna shave off all my hair, to be honest.”

Gee grinned and replied while putting their hair up, “Yeah, but I like my hair too much to do that.”

Jenna giggled and shoved Gee lightly, “Remember that time you cut off all your hair and made it white? That was weird.”

“Dark times, my friends,” Gee said, “Dark times.”

“Hey, it wasn't that bad!” Hayley said, laughing more.

Gee shook their head, “Wasn't that good either!”

“At least your hair is better now,” Jenna added, “You really pull off the whole ‘guy with long hair’ thing, Gerard.”

Gee’s stomach fell at the word ‘guy.’ Right. Of course. They both thought of Gee as a guy- maybe an effeminate guy, but a guy nonetheless.

That always felt so  _wrong_  to Gee, because they could see that they weren't a boy. Even if they were having a bad day, full of dysphoria and self hated, they still knew deep down that they weren't a boy. They knew most people didn't see them that way, knew the majority of the population wouldn't see them that way, but they still knew the truth.

They weren't a boy and, no matter how many people misgendered them, they always would believe it.

Gerard tried to cover up their slight inner recoil by smiling widely and replying, “I know, I look really good nowadays.”

“Yeah, you do,” Hayley giggled, “Whoever is or isn't dating you is very lucky.”

Gee was pretty sure Hayley looked at Frank when she said that, but they couldn't be sure. They weren't that obvious about dating Frank, were they?

"Hah," Gee started nervously, "Too bad I'n single."

Hayley definitely gave them a suspicious look at that, but didn't say anything else. If she wanted to think Gee was dating Frank, then she could do that as she pleased. Gee wouldn't give her the satisfaction of learning the truth.

Frank caught up with the group of girls and grinned widely at Gee, saying, "Hey! You dead yet, Gee?"

Gee looked at him and raised and eyebrow, "What do you think?"

"Well, considering your hair is tied up and you look like you're about to pass out, I'm gonna go with 'about to die,'" Frank laughed slightly, then bumped shoulder's with Gee, asking, "Did you bring water? Please tell me you brought water."

When Gee didn't reply, just gave Frank a sheepish look, Frank groaned and added, "Gee, you gotta drink water! Here, wait, drink some of mine. I don't want you to like, die of dehydration or anything."

Gee smiled and accepted Frank's bottle of water, giving him a thankful look. They were just about ready to pass out or drink their own pee or something else equally ridiculous. Not their fault they had a shitty memory and didn't wanna bother anyone by asking to steal their water.

Gee pointedly ignored the way Hayley was looking at Gee and Frank, as if she was waiting for them to slip up and reveal something. Gee didn't know why Hayley was suddenly so interested in their relationship with Frank. It's not like they only now started seeing each other more while at camp- they had been interacting with Hayley at drama group meetings and practices. It just confused Gee a lot.

It also made Gee paranoid. Had they been too obvious? Did Hayley see them doing something too couple-y?

Growing self conscious, Gee moved slightly away from Frank- not wanting to walk too close to him. They figured it was a dick move- not like Frank did anything wrong- but they couldn't help feeling scared about the situation. After everything that went down with Mikey and Pete, they didn't want to risk it.

Frank gave them a confused look, but didn't ask. Maybe he knew that they were just trying to be careful. He then moved closer to Hayley and started talking to her about something related to the drama group. Gee didn't know what, though, since they started tuning the conversastion out after not long. 

They had been feeling shitty all of the day, and Hayley's casual hinting that she knew about them dating Frank just made them feel worse- feel like they had to close off so no one else would find out.

\-----------

The group returned to the lodge a little before dinner time. Gee hadn't spoken to Frank at all since he had given them his water bottle  and they were starting to feel bad. He didn't do anything wrong, Gee just had a problem with isolating themselves the moment anything slightly went wrong. They didn't want to take it out on Frank, though, so they sat beaide him during dinner- even going so far as to give him a small smile when he gave them a concerned look.

Gee was just bad at this relationship thing. They knew that would be the case, though. They just wished they never tricked Frank into thinking they were a good person to date, because they sure as hell didn't feel like a good girlfriend right now.

They also felt dirty for being his "girlfriend." They felt like they were wrong for making him date them even though they weren't a guy. He might seem okay with Gee, but they couldn't help feeling dirty and guilty.

Gee spent the majority of the night ignoring everyones attempt to talk to them. They were too tired to talk, too tired to interact with anyone. They did want to pretened they were being sociable, though, so when Frank, Pete, Josh, Mikey, Spencer, Ryan, Brendon, Nate, Ray, Brent, Andy, and Patrick left to hang out in the guys sleeping area, Gee didn't refuse their invitation to join them. They figured they would just sit close to Mikey and not actually participate in the conversation.

Gee was mostly tuning everything out, but their interest was piqued when they heard Nate say, "Wait, isn't Frank gay?"

Gee was paying attention now. Frank hadn't said anything regarding his sexuality in a while, so Gee wasn't sure if he still said that he was into guys or not. They looked at him, hoping that it wasn't too obvious how nervous they were to hear Frank's answer to Nate's question.

"Nah, I'm actually bi. Like, bisexual," Frank responded, seeming to not notice Gee looking directly at him.

Nate scratched his head, looking confused, "Didn't you say you were gay, though? I swear I remember you saying that."

"Yeah, I did think that for a while, but I met this girl and for some reason I can just.... never get her out of my head," He glanced at Gee slightly, then added, "Although, right now she seems upset, but instead of talking to me about why she's upset, she's just ignoring me altogether. Overall she's pretty great, but she can be a little shit sometimes. I just wish she would talk to me instead of shutting me out."

Gee now was having conflicting feelings. On one hand, Frank was calling himself bi now! Also he was referring to Gee as his girlfriend! But on the other hand, they now felt really shitty about not talking to him.

"Wait, who's your girlfriend? Is it someone we know?" Nate asked, looking excited to learn more about someone who- little did he know- he had known his whole life.

"Uh, no, I doubt you guys know her," Frank started, "I, uhm- I met her at a show. Like, a punk show? I don't think she lives that nearby."

Gee wanted to congratulate Frank on his lying skills- proves that he had been spending too much time hanging out with Gee and Mikey.

Frank continued, saying, "But, uh, she's kind of a huge nerd. Like, a massive nerd. She also draws a lot? And is like... honestly so gorgeous, but she doesn't see it. She's pretty insecure overall, but I try to help her feel beautiful anyway."

"What does she look like?" Andy asked, interupting Frank's train of thought.

"Well, she has about shoulder length black hair, a bit taller than me, kinda chubby, great ass-"

"Okay, that's enough about Frank's girlfriend, don't ya think?" Mikey said, looking desperate to stop Frank from talking about Gee's ass.

Gee knew fully well that Frank saying those things about them (her? Gee did quite like the way it sounded to be referred to as a 'she') made it so now everyone who had confirmation that Gee was dating Frank would also now know that Gee was trans, but they couldn't seem to care. Plus, it wasn't that big of a deal. Most of the people who knew Frank was dating them also already knew Gee was trans- or, in the case of Pete, had seen them dressed very femininely. 

They didn't actually know who knew, but they just couldn't worry when all the things Frank had said were still running through their head.

After a while, it was time for lights out. Gee still hadn't talked to Frank alone, but they really hoped everything was okay. Worst comes to worst they could just talk to him tomorrow, or when they got home, but they didn't want to wait that long.

Gee quietly got out of bed and tiptoed out of the sleeping area and to the bathroom. When they were there safely, they texted Frank to meet them in the bathroom.

After a minute or two without Frank showing up, Gee was scared that he had already fallen asleep and therefore hadn't gotten the text. But, thankfully, the silence was broken by Frank slowly opening and closing the bathroom door, then walking over to Gee, standing close.

Gee reached out and held Frank's hand, smiling softly before saying, "Sorry for being a little shit today."

Frank smiled back, then stepped closer to them and replied, "It's okay, just wish you would talk to me when something was wrong."

"I know, baby, I'm sorry. It's- it's just hard sometimes, y'know?"

"I know, babe," Frank kissed Gee's forehead, "Even if you can't say it, you can try to like... I don't know. Randomly shutting me out after seemingly nothing? I mean I'm sure something did happen, but I just-"

"Hey, hey, I know, baby. I even knew I was in the wrong, but I just... didn't have the energy to tell you I was feeling bad, or something."

"Do you have the energy now? To tell me what's wrong, I mean," Frank said, then quickly added, "It's okay if you don't, though!"

Gee shook their head and laughed softly, "Yeah, it's okay, I'm basiclly fine now, I think. I just had a semi crisis involving Hayley hinting heavily that she knew we were dating, plus I also was just on low energy all day. Those two things mixed with us climbing a mountain made me pretty worn out, but I'm good now. I think I started avoiding you because I was paranoid that everyone would find out we were dating and freak out or something."

"I get that, honey. If you want we can lay low for a while, try to get people a bit off our scent?"

Gee giggled and kissed Frank softly, "I think you were able to do that quite well with your stories of this punk girlfriend with the great butt."

"Okay first of all," Frank started, "I never said you were punk, I said you were a nerd. Second of all, you do have a great butt," he finished talking and squeezed Gee's ass, causing them to laugh and kiss him again.

Gee then pulled away and smiled widely at Frank, "Also, I gotta admit, I did really like hearing you call me a 'she' and a 'her.'"

"Yeah? Do you want me to use those pronouns more often?" Frank asked, smiling back at them.

"Yeah, but only if you want and if it's too much of a hassle then you don't-"

Frank put his finger on Gee's lip, shushing them slightly and stopping their ramblings, "Babe, it doesn't matter how I feel, just tell me if that's what you want."

Gee blushed sheepishly, "Yeah, I think that's what I want. Thank you."

"Of course," Frank kisses Gee softly, "Feel free to yell at me if I forget, though."

Gee giggled and leaned her head on Frank's shoulder, "I'm not gonna yell at you."

"Okay, I'm just saying you totally can if you want," Frank wrapped his arms around Gee and pulled her in close, "We probably should get back. Don't wanna be completely sleep deprived tomorrow."

Gee nodded and pulled away from Frank, then walked hand in hand with him back to the sleeping area.

\----------

Gee woke up the next day feeling not too bad, surprisingly. Even though the day ended well, she still was expecting to feel bad when she woke up. She did feel a little sad that it was the lastvday at camp, but she also was excited to be back hom in her own house again.

Breakfast that morning was a very loud, somewhat rushed event. Everyone was trying to milk the last few moments of camp before they had to pack up and go home.

The other church was leaving earlier- since their drive was longer- and Gee watched as Pete, Ryan, Mikey, and Spencer had a long going away group hug. It was a bitter-sweet moment, though she did hear Spencer and Mikey promise to keep in touch better this year round. 

Gee slept for most of the ride home, the week of being social finally catching up to her. She did wake up a few times, though mostly just to see Mikey, Pete, and Josh being obviously flirty in the back row. They all had decided to ride in Dallon's van on the way back; Gee sitting in the second to back row with Frank and Ray with Patrick and Ashley in front of them and Nate sitting up front with Dallon.

The ride back was usually calmer than the ride up, so it was easier for Gee to sleep, all cuddled up with Frank.

When everyone arrived back at church, they all were finally taking the toll of being at camp the whole week. They all bid their goodbyes in a tired daze, then Gee and Mikey got into their parents' car and drove home- a slight smile dancing its way onto both of their faces as they thought of all the things that had happened at summer camp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey yall as always feel free to comment/leave kudos and to hmu on tumblr (autistickobrkid.tumblr.com) or twitter (@Allegrcat)
> 
> also now I have an instagram! so hmu on insta at artsy_vampire for way too many selfies nd probs a lotta pics/vids of dogs


	22. Matthew 19:14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> V.B.S. was always a wild affair- both for people helping out with it and for the kids who were attending. Mikey, obviously, was one of the people helping out. He had been assigned as one of the leaders of the youngest age group. He still wasn't sure who else was going to be a group leader with him, but he didn't really care who it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god I'm,,, so sorry it took this long to post i have been struggling a lot with mental + physical health the past couple months and it has been a disaster so like I wasn't able to think enough to actually write for most of that time and I apologize a lot
> 
> but yall its the new year what the fuck!!! thats so fuckin weird that ive been writing this for over a year like... so much has changed since I started writing this and I'm kinda amazed i got this far with it? and like wrote this much? cause lemme tell you i did NOT expect it to be this long when i first started lmao but here we are.... over 100k words and a year later and im still kickin' 
> 
> i know this isnt the end of the fic but i just wanna thank you for all the people who have been reading this consistently im kinda amazed that anyone actually likes this lmao
> 
> but happy new year!!! i hope 2017 does you better than 2016 and I highly encourage yall to keep on fighting even if thins are tough (and fighting can look differently for different people, so just staying alive is enough TBH)
> 
> anyways,,,, enough be sappy,,,, enjoy this chapter yall !! i hope its worth the wait

V.B.S. was always a wild affair- both for people helping out with it and for the kids who were attending. Mikey, obviously, was one of the people helping out. He had been assigned as one of the leaders of the youngest age group. He still wasn't sure who else was going to be a group leader with him, but he didn't really care who it was.

Mikey and Gee arrived at the church a few hours early because Jon wanted to practice the skit a few times before the kids got there. The church was hectic, all the volunteers running about to make sure everything was in place. They both made their way to the back of the church where they would be practicing.

So far only Jon and Hayley were there, although it wasn't completely surprising. Mikey sat down next to Hayley, stretching his arms and asking, "How long have you been here?"

"Uh, got here maybe five minutes ago? Not sure exactly, but it hasn't been long."

"Cool, cool," Mikey nodded his head, then added, "I am so tired."

"Yeah? Me too. I just can't wait 'til we actually start doing things, then I can just ignore my sleepiness and keep busy with kids and stuff."

Mikey laughed and leaned his head on his knees, "I feel that. Where are you gonna be working?"

"Arts and crafts," Hayley replied, "I'm gonna be doing it with Ariel."

“Oh, nice! That sounds like it’d be fun!”

“Yeah, it is! I did it last year too, it’s great,” Hayley smiled, “But, what are you doing?”

“Gonna be one of the leaders of the youngest kids group. I’m excited, I like working with little kids,” Mikey replied.

Hayley’s expression fell as Mikey said this, making him think that he said something wrong. He sat up and and tilted his head, asking, “What? Did I say something bad?”

Hayley looked sheepish as she responded, saying, “It’s just... don’t you know who’s also gonna be a leader in that group?”

“Uh... no? I haven’t looked yet.” Mikey was still confused, but starting to get concerned. Who was gonna be a leader with him that even Hayley knew it was a bad idea?

“It’s... it’s Tyler, Mikey. You’re gonna be working with Tyler.”

Well, shit.

“Ohh.... fuck. That’s- that’s gonna suck.”

Hayley laughed slightly, no real humor in her tone, and said, “Yeah, I know. Hopefully he won’t be too... I don’t know. Weird, or whatever.”

“Yeah, fuck, me too. Man, this put a bummer on the whole week. Can’t believe I gotta deal with that homophobic prick for this long.”

Hayley patted Mikey on the shoulder sympathetically, “It’s okay, at least you’ll be able to hang out with cool people during crafts”

“Oh, yeah, totally,” Mikey said, laughing and poking Hayley’s cheek.

“What? I hear the girls who are running it are super awesome!” Hayley said, a grin spreading across her face as Mikey continued to poke her.

“Uh huh, sure, I totally believe you.” They both started giggling, Hayley leaning into Mikey’s side as she laughed.

Suddenly Pete and Frank walked in, Frank yelling, “Guys, blame Pete for me being late. He fucking sucks.”

“I don’t suck! You gave me the wrong address!”

“I did not!”

“Did too!”

“See, this is why I prefer when Gee gives me a ride,” Frank grumbled as he sat besides Gee, “Sh- he’s always there for me.”

Gee grinned widely at Frank and wrapped her arms around his waist, saying, “Yeah! I’m the best at giving rides.”

“Unless you forget that you’re supposed to pick the person up until you’re already about to arrive at the destination,” Mikey laughed.

“That was one time!”

“It still happened!” Mikey said, grinning widely. He liked bringing up dumb shit Gee has done so Frank knows he’s dating a loser.

“You’re the worst, Mikey,” Gee said, flipping Mikey off. Mikey flipped her off back right as Ray walked in.

Jon clapped his hands together loudly, a grin spreading across his face as he said, "Good! Everyone's here! Now we can finally get down to practicing."

"Wait, am I seriously the last person here?" Ray asked, looking around the room in confusion.

"Yup, even Pete got here before you," Hayley replied.

"What the hell, that seems wrong. Pete always comes last!"

"To be fair, we like... just got here," Frank said.

"Wait, what do you mean 'we?'" Ray asked, "Did Pete give you a ride?"

"Yes, he did, and he was very bad at it," Frank replied.

Pete rolled his eyes, "God, not this again."

"You arrived at my house five minutes before we were supposed to be at the church! I do not live five minutes away from the church, Pete!"

"I had to take a shower!"

"Why didn't you do it earlier?"

"I like to spice things up and shower right before I'm supposed to leave. Really keeps people on their toes."

Frank flipped Pete off, saying, "You fucking suck."

"Guys, guys, please settle down! I want at least one more practice run before we have to actually perform, and Mikey still always misses his cues," Jon said, stopping any more arguments between Pete and Frank.

"Sorry, I keep getting distracted," Mikey said sheepishly.

"Well, no more distractions! This time is serious!"

"It's still just a V.B.S. skit," Hayley pointed out, "Plus the kids love it when we mess up."

"That's true! Remember last year? Ray literally had no idea what he was doing, but everyone ended up loving his character," Gee added.

"I still want people to at least somewhat know what's happening!"

Ray walked over to Jon and put his arm around Jon's shoulder, saying, "Don't worry, Jonny, I actually remember what I'm supposed to be doing this time."

"I'm not worried about you, I'm worried about those two troublemakers," Jon responded, gesturing at Pete and Mikey.

"Oh! Speaking of trouble makers!" Pete exclaimed, a grin spreading across his face as he started to dig through his bag, "I brought the perfect shirt for my costume."

He pulled out a white tank top that was covered in what suspiciously looked like blood and possibly also coffee. Everyone in the room groaned in disgust, and Mikey wondered how his boyfriend found a shirt this disgusting.

He asked Pete, and Pete just grinned wider and said, "I've had this shirt forever! Then I accidentally cut myself while cooking and I was wearing this so i just wiped the blood off on it, but there was like... a lot of blood, so this is what happened! Really gross, right?"

"Oh god, you somehow made it worse then I thought it would be," Hayley said, looking horrified.

"Wait, is that seriously your actual blood? Nice," Frank high fived Pete, both of them grinning.

"No, seriously, that's disgusting. Pete, what the hell?" Hayley was now looking disgusted at both Pete and Frank.

"I agree with Hayley," Ray said, "That is nasty, dude."

"It does look perfect, though," Jon said, taking the shirt from Pete and inspecting it closer.

"It has his blood on it!"

"None of the kids have to know that!"

"Okay but it is pretty obvious that it's covered in blood," Pete said.

"Shouldn't you be on my side?" Jon asked, crossing his arms.

Pete shrugged, "I mean, I am on your side, I just also think it's pretty obvious that it's covered in blood."

"Technically the kids could think it was paint or something." Gee pointed out.

"Y'know, you guys are debating for no reason, 'cause I'm gonna wear it no matter what you guys say," Pete said with a laugh.

"Good! Now, let's get to practice!" Jon said, clapping his hands together for emphasis.

Hayley rolled her eyes and grumbled something about how she was surrounded by weirdos and Ray patted her on the shoulder sympathetically. Mikey had to admit that it was pretty gross, but that was barely the grossest thing Pete- or anyone in the room- has done, so he didn't understand why Ray and Hayley were that grossed out by it.

Practice went by quickly and next thing Mikey knew they were performing it in front of the kids. Pete kept trying to make everyone break character, but Hayley seemed dead set on ignoring everything he did (unless, of course, the script wanted her to interact with Pete). Frank seemed weirdly okay with playing a character that was so obviously written by some misogynist that only expect girls to like makeup and the color pink and absolutely nothing else.

It all went smoothly, to say the least. Except for once when Gee got distracted and missed her cue and had Hayley repeat her line at least four times before Gee finally noticed and sprayed the audience with water.

Mikey quickly got changed into the V.B.S. leader shirt and went out to meet up with his group. He was a bit nervous, to be honest. He hated that he would have to deal with Tyler the whole week, and it made it even worse that he was currently dating Tyler's (ex?) best friend. He caught up to them and grinned passive aggressively at Tyler, saying, "I'm here! You don't have to worry now."

Tyler rolled his eyes, “Great, I was hoping you’d quit when you found out I’d be the other leader.”

“Nope! You’re stuck with me, Ty,” Mikey said, still grinning.

“Lucky me,” Tyler grumbled, purposely not looking at Mikey.

Mikey didn't care, though. He would just passive aggressively ignore Tyler's homophobic bullshit and try to just make it until he could see Pete again. It wouldn’t be too long, only about an hour, but Mikey was still impatient.

Mikey sighed, “Listen, I know neither of us like each other, but we need to suck it up and not be shi- mean to each other in front of the kids. Whether you like it or not, we still are their leaders for the week. I'm not saying we have to be friendly, but we shouldn't be aggressive or anything, deal?”

Mikey held out his hand for Tyler to shake, and Tyler rolled his eyes, before shaking Mikey's hand and saying, “Fine, deal.”

Their group arrived at the first stop- the arts and crafts room- and lead the kids inside. Hayley beamed at Mikey when he walked in. After they sat the kids down and got them started on their crafts Hayley sat down next to Mikey.

“So how is the most awkward leader pairing working out?” She asked, glancing over at Tyler.

“Uh, so far so good?” Mikey replied “We made a deal to be at least somewhat civil ‘cause we're leaders of children.”

“Well that's good,” Hayley laughed, “It'd suck if you two were at each other's throats the entire week.”

“Yeah, I know. But, we currently have a truce so, y’know, no killing each other yet.” He looked over to where Tyler was helping out a kid with her craft. It was weird that just one year ago Mikey would've still considered Tyler a friend- maybe not the closest friend, but a friend nonetheless. Now he couldn't feel that, though. He couldn't feel anything other than fear and hurt when he was around Tyler.

It didn't help that Tyler constantly would shoot disgusted looks in Mikey's direction whenever he had the chance.

Craft time went by quickly, Mikey spending most of the time with Hayley, wanting to avoid Tyler as much as he physically could. It was fun, Mikey always enjoyed this part of it- especially since Hayley was always fun to hang out with. He hadn't been hanging out with her as much recently, which was a bummer because she was well cool. He had to remember to ask if she wanted to hang out sometime other than at church, it had been too long.

They helped the kids pack up all their stuff before leaving, Hayley and Ariel waving them off as they left. Tyler walked at the front of the group, leading the kids to their next destination. Mikey's mind was other places, though. He couldn't stop thinking about Pete and Josh and how Josh was Tyler's friend since they were toddlers and oh god it would be bad it Tyler ever found out Josh was dating Pete and Mikey. That was a shit storm he wanted to put off for as long as possible.

They were walking through the halls when they passed Sisky’s group. He looked stressed as fuck, all the kids loud and all over the place and he was stuck being the only one in charge of them. Mikey gave him a sympathetic look, which Sisky responded to by mouthing “help me” at him.

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes as they continued walking down the hall. Even if he wanted to help, he couldn't exactly abandon his own group.

Although... he could just ditch Tyler and go with Sisky’s group instead. The one problem with that is he really, really did not wanna deal with 10 year olds. They were a bit too much for what he felt like dealing with.

When they got to the teaching room, Dallon welcomed them in with a grin. Mikey and Tyler directed all the children to sit down to listen to the lesson. The kids were being surprisingly obedient, which Mikey was grateful for. It was always stressful when a lot of the kids were being unruly.

Nate was Dallon’s assistant, so Mikey tried to stay as close to him as much as he could the whole time, sticking to the far left side of the room while Tyler stayed on the opposite side. Nate kept getting Mikey to help him with various assistant tasks, keeping him busy and distracted from Tyler’s annoyed glares.

Mikey kept also getting texts from Pete through the day, usually just pictures of all the messes he had to clean up that ‘totally were the kids fault and not at all because I was clumsy, Mikes.’ Mikey, of course, did not believe that Pete wasn’t the cause of all the spills, but he was entertained by the nearly constant stream of texts that Pete sent him (even if he wasn’t able to look at them all right away).

Dallon gave him an annoyed look when he noticed Mikey was on his phone, so he sheepishly put it away and vowed to pay less attention to Pete (for now).

The lesson was about Jesus calming the storm, so obviously at one point Nate made Mikey turn off all the lights and spray the kids with water while Nate directed a fan to point at the kids. They all were screaming excitedly and moving around, Tyler and Mikey having to settle them down once that part of the teaching was done because they all were now hyper and wet.

Getting them cleaned up and out of the room was a hassle, but thankfully they were heading over to snacks so they would calm down a bit then. Snacks also meant that Mikey could see Pete, which would be a fucking good(gay) time for Mikey, and absolute hell for Tyler. Perfect.

Mikey sent Pete a text saying that they were coming over, and Pete just replied with a selfie of him and Josh saying, “We’ll see you soon babe! <3”

Hell fucking yes.

Even if it was briefly, Mikey would still get to see both of his boyfriends! He was so excited, he felt like he was gonna burst. Man, when did he get so gay? Probably when he got two also very gay boyfriends who were very affectionate and would always send him nice texts throughout the day.

Speaking of, Josh just sent him another selfie of him and Pete in the bathroom with Pete kissing Josh’s cheek, saying, “Missing you <3”

Fuck, why did walking across the street take so long? He just wanted to get to the other building so he could see Pete and Josh- although at this rate he wouldn’t be surprised if his group just passed Josh’s group on the way out of the fire escape.

They did end up passing Josh and Jenna’s group right as the entered the fire escape. Mikey’s eyes lit up when he saw Josh, a smile unintentionally spreading across his face as he saw his boyfriend walking by. He wanted to reach out and hold Josh’s hand, or maybe at least just brush his finger across Josh’s arm, but he had to hold back.

Mikey noticed Tyler briefly smile at Jenna and it suddenly hit im that they were dating. He had completely forgotten, having been so avoident of anything relating to Tyler- other than Josh- that he completely forgot about Jenna- she just got caught up in the wave of things and forced into the part of Mikey’s mind where Tyler was stashed away.

Mikey then wondered if Tyler felt like this when he saw Jenna in public, this strange mix of fear and giddiness that hit Mikey whenever he saw Pete or Josh. This feeling of want and need, like he ached to have any small touches that he possibly could have but knew was forbidden, a sad longing in his chest to just be able to act like a “normal” couple in public.

But of course Tyler wouldn’t have that feeling. He was the one with the “normal” relationship, the one who could be as open as he wanted without any fear of the consequences. While Mikey was stuck sneaking around, desperate for nothing more than to hold Pete or Josh’s hands, Tyler was free to do just about anything he wanted in public with Jenna- within reason of course.

He then wondered if Tyler appreciated Jenna as much as she deserved, if he cherished the moments he had with her like how Mikey cherished the short moments he had alone with Pete and Josh. Did he cherish the moments holding her in his arms like when Mikey could hold Pete? Did he keep images of her waking up beside him with shining eyes and tousled hair, grinning at him through her sleepiness like those few times Mikey had that with Josh?

Did he even have moments like this? Mikey thought he might, but then again, the only one upside to dating someone of the same gender was they were allowed to sleep over, so you could do more with them. Although, he couldn’t really do that with Pete anymore, since everyone knew about them. The funny thing, though, is he could do that with Pete if Josh was also there- their parents thinking it was okay because Josh was a “good, christian, straight kid.”

Their parents were basically fine only when Mikey was able to be his complete gay and poly self.

What good parents.

Mikey was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Pete yelling, “MIKEYWAY!” directly into his ear.

Mikey yelped and shoved Pete, glaring at him and saying, “Thanks for startling me, you fuc- nerd.”

“What? I just wanted to give you a proper greeting!”

“You’re a dick.”

“Okay, that’s enough boys,” Breezy said, walking up beside Pete, “We gotta start handing out snacks. Mikey, can you help seat the kids? Tyler, come help me with a few things over here- Andy would help but he accidentally cut his finger so he’s quickly cleaning it up in the bathroom, but I need you for now. Oh, and Pete? Can you please continue pouring the drinks?”

“Ay ay, Captain,” Pete said, saluting Breezy before hopping off to do as she asked. Mikey said a quick hello to Breezy before also going off to do what she told him to do.

The kids were pretty hyper, but mostly in an “excited to eat” way, so Mikey didn't have trouble getting them situated. He sat down next to some of the kids and started chatting with them, asking them about how they're enjoying V.B.S. so far and which parts they liked best.

“I liked the play,” one of the girls- Emily, Mikey remembered- replied, “I really like the cook.”

Mikey grinned, “I really like the cook too. Did you know he's gonna be serving us today? I can introduce you if you want.”

“Ew, I don't want him serving me! He was dirty,” another girl said.

“Don't worry, I made sure he washed himself beforehand,” Mikey said with a laugh.

“Are you his best friend? Ellie is my best friend,” Emily asked.

“He's something like that!”

As if on cue, Pete walked up and started handing out the drinks to the kids. Mikey gestured him over to the table he was sitting at and said, “Pete, meet Emily! She's a fan.”

Pete came over, grinning as he said, “Emily is it? Hi! I'm Pete!”

Emily giggled and hid her face in her hands, suddenly shy now that Pete was nearby. Pete just grinned and said, “It was nice meeting you, i have to go make some food for you guys, though. I'll see you more during the week though!”

Pete walked away and Mikey couldn't help grinning to himself. Fuck, he loved pete so much. He was so overwhelmed with his love that he wanted to scream and run around, telling everyone about his love for him. The only thing keeping him from doing that was, y'know, the homophobia. He still wanted to do it though, but he'd just have to restrain himself until he could talk to Gee later.

Mikey continued talking to the kids, getting to know them a bit better during the snack period where it was easier to talk to them. He also kept glancing at Pete, who also was talking to the kids. Andy seemed to stay behind the counter, only leaving to full up kids drinks and to clean up messes. Mikey barely saw Tyler, who was at the other side of the room, much to his pleasure. He wanted to stay as far away from Tyler as he possibly could.

He felt nauseous just being around Tyler, let alone having to interact with him. This whole week was gonna be hell, but Mikey would deal. At least he'd have Pete at snack time and the occasional running into Josh while walking to the next station. Also, of course, Gee and Ray doing games every day too. He would be able to deal with Tyler, even if it did still suck.

Snack went by too quickly for Mikey's liking, but soon enough he had to gather up the kids and leave Pete. It sucked, but he couldn't exactly get out if it. He gave Pete a high five on the way out, and Tyler glared at them as if they had started fucking on one of the tables. Mikey just ignored him and directed the kids out, telling them to wave goodbye to Breezy, Pete, and Andy as they left.

The next stop was games, so at least Mikey could be with Gee and Ray- plus Frank, who had to stay around because Gee was his ride home, even if he wasn't gonna volunteer to be a leader at V.B.S. Apparently he was too gay and not Christian enough to be a volunteer, even though Pete, Mikey, Gee, and Josh also fit under that category. Maybe it was just because he was very open about his sexuality.

Mikeys group arrived at the game room and was immediately greeted by Ray yellling at them to get against one of the walls, starting off game time with a bang. The next half hour was full of screaming and crying as Mikey watched the games from the sidelines with Frank.

They were sitting on the floor, their backs leaning up against the wall, as they watched Gee and Ray direct the kids through the games. It suddenly dawned on Mikey that he hadn't really talked with Frank just the two of them. Maybe they did once or twice, but usually at least someone else was also in the conversation.

This seemed like a weird moment, like an other worldly experience was about to happen. He was in that tired limo where he wasn't actually sleepy, but his senses were duller and everything seemed slow. He watched the kids playing games, then asked Frank, "How are things with you and Gee?"

Frank shrugged, "About normal? She keeps sending me pictures of moldy coffee mugs so that's kind of disgusting but like, that's Gee for you."

"Oh yeah, she has a ton of moldy cups in her room. It is horrifying," Mikey said with a laugh.

"Yeah, yeah it is. I love my trash girlfriend."

"Ooh, 'love' you say?" Mikey said teasingly.

Frank rolled his eyes, "I know what I said."

"Have you told Gee yet?"

"Uh, no I haven't. But she probably wouldn't believe it anyway, even if I did tell her."

"Sounds like you're just making excuses," Mikey said, poking Frank repeatedly in the side.

Frank batted his fingers away, saying, "Okay, maybe, but I'll say it when I wanna say it!

"Okay, okay.... All I'm gonna say is if you tell her you love her she'll definitely say it back," Mikey said, looking at his nails nonchalantly.

"Wait, really? Did she say something to you? Tell me!"

"Nah, she didn't technically say anything, but I can tell. I have a sixth sense of knowing how my sister feels before she knows it."

Frank laughed, "Pretty shit super power, dude."

"Oh, I know," Mikey grinned.

"Speaking of my trash girlfriend, she's coming over now," Frank whispered to Mikey right before Gee got to them. She was grinning widely and pulled Frank up by his arm, saying, "We need one more participant!"

"Why not Mikey?" Frank asked.

"Because you're cuter! Now get your butt out there, soldier!" She slapped his ass before going back over to where Ray was, motioning for Frank to follow her. Frank just shrugged and did what she wanted, waving at Mikey as he walked away.

Mikey sat alone for the rest of games, helping every now and then whenever he was needed. Tyler kept taking any opportunities for him to help, though. Probably because he didn't want to have to interact with Mikey, but also possibly because he didn't want Mikey tainting the poor children with his filthy queer hands.

Or maybe a mixture of the two.

Either way, Mikey did barely anything during all of games, just watching everything from the sidelines and cheering on the kids while they played.

Soon enough, they had to leave games and go back to the main sanctuary for the end of the day. Mikey was happy about this, even if he did enjoy volunteering. It just slowly wore him down having to look after kids for that long, so he was always relieved whenever it was the end of the day. Not to mention the fact that he had to deal with Tyler for most of the day.

After all the kids had been picked up by their parents, most of the youth volunteers were sitting on the floor of the sanctuary and talking- either waiting for their rides or just wanting to hang around a little longer for social purposes.

Josh was sitting next to Mikey, close enough for their legs to be pressed against each other- the most PDA that they coulr actually get away with without anyone realizing the real form of their relationship. Tyler was packing up his stuff and getting ready to leave, but he kept giving Josh looks that made Mikey very uncomfortable- almost like Tyler felt betrayed that Josh was still hanging out with Mikey even though he's a filthy queer.

Josh didn't seem to notice, though. Or he was just actively ignoring Tyler. Either way, he just kept smiling at Mikey and asked, "Hey, wanna come over to my place? Pete's coming over so I thought I might ask you too."

This got Tyler's attention, making him stop just glancing over at them and actually walking over to where they were sitting. He crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes at Josh, then asked, "Why do you always ask them to come over before me? We haven't hung out in weeks, Josh."

Panic spread across Josh's face and he turned crimson, like he was a kid who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He cleared his throat and shrugged, replying with, "Uhm I don't know."

Tyler sighed and rolled his eyes, "Fine, whatever. I don't care. Just completely drop your closest friend for a couple of-"

Ray suddenly came over and put his hand on Tyler's shoulder firmly, saying, "I think you should stop right there, Tyler. Remember what happened last time you said that? We don't want a repeat of the New Years party."

Tyler shrugged off Ray's hand and grumbled out, "Whatever, my mom's probably here anyway."

Mikey watched Tyler leave and didn't know whether to be relieved or more scared about he rest of the week. It was only day one and Tyler had already almost started a fight.

Fan-fucking-tastic.

God, he just wanted to have this week over with already so he could go back to completely avoiding Tyler at all costs.

Mikey turned back to Josh, wanting to make sure his boyfriend was alright. Josh seemed shaken up, so Mikey looked around to make sure no adults were around before reaching out and holding Josh's hand. He smiled at Mikey slightly and said, "Has this turned you off wanting to come to my house with Pete?"

"Hell no," Mikey said, smiling back at Josh.

\----------

The three boys were sitting on Josh's bed, cuddled up together and watching something on Josh's laptop. Pete was sitting in between Mikey and Josh, which was retroactively a terrible idea considering he was singing along and waving his arms around wildly- hitting both Josh and Mikey in the face multiple times.

"I'm getting bi! I'm getting bi! I'm letting my bi flags fly!" Pete sang along loudly as Mikey laughed and buried his face in the blanket. Josh was grinning at the two of them kept whining about how cute they were and how it was totally unfair, guys.

Mikey kept giggling, any negative feelings he had at V.B.S. now gone. This was what he was alive for, this is what happiness was. The laughter and warmth from his boyfriends made up for all the shittiness in his life, made up for the homophobia he had to face from his parents and Tyler. It made it all worth it, it outweighed the bad and in the end he felt like he loved more for it.

As the sun set outside and the room darkened, Mikey couldn't help grinning at his boyfriends who made it seem as bright as day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the song Pete is singing at the end is Getting Bi from the show Crazy Ex Girlfriend and yes that is an actual song from an actual tv show. I highly suggest it because it is SO GOOD and SO PURE and actually has good bisexual representation which like never happens soo yes please watch it (the first season is on Netflix !!)
> 
> and as always feel free to hmu on tumblr (@queercassianandor), twitter (@Allegrcat), instagram (artsy_vampire), and/or snapchat (artsy_vampire) !
> 
> have a good day and a good year !!


	23. 1 Peter 4:9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Okay, this is gonna sound really not sexy, but you can roll up an old bag of Doritos and shove it in my mouth.”
> 
> “Wow, you’re right, that is really not sexy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is like 85% sex and I'm only a little bit sorry lmao
> 
> also??? theres only two more chapters planned after this...... The End Is Near, My Friends

V.B.S. seemed to go by in a flash, and next thing Gee knew it was the final day. It had all been so fun, although it also was exhausting. She might enjoy being in charge of games with Ray every year (since she was old enough), but by the last day she just wanted it to be over.

The drama team was going through the skit for the last day a few times before they actually had to do it so that it would be the best for the kids. Gee was tired and thankful that she wasn't really in the play this year, her job basically being completely back stage stuff.

Gee was watching them acting it out, but only technically. She mostly was actually just zoning out and trying to remember how many hours she had slept that week. After a while, she gave up and concluded that it was not enough hours. She was starting to feel less sleepy though and more like the entire world was vibrating. Like if she tried standing up her body would move too quickly and she'd be watching the world from a blurry haze.

She really, really needed sleep.

The others finished practicing the skit and Frank came over to her, looking happy and way to attractive considering Gee knows he stayed up all night too, what the fuck. He had been texting her until 7 am, she has PROOF. How the hell does he not look like a disaster?

Frank came and sat next to Gee, smiling as he asked, "Hey, wanna come over tonight after V.B.S. is done? My parents are probably gonna be out all night so y'know we could have the house to ourselves."

Gee vaguely knew what Frank was hinting at, what he wanted to do, but for some reason the words weren't connecting properly and she didn't think it through when she said, "Yeah, sure. We can watch all those movies I've been meaning to show you."

Frank laughed and replied, "Sounds like a plan."

\----------

As the day continued, what Frank had said was starting to sink in more completely. She was getting distracted thinking about it, missing almost all of her cues during the skit because she was zoning out. She ended up throwing the water on Ray almost a scene early, making him have to improve a line about how unpredictable the sea can be. The kids seemed to love it, but Gee was embarrassed that she had gotten so distracted. It's not like she has any reason to be this distractible.

Except she's running on very little sleep and everything is too loud and too bright and her boyfriend possibly was implying that he wanted to have sex with her tonight and she still was confused about everything. It just was all too much- being awake, being alive, she just wanted to turn everything off for a little while and maybe take some time to figure everything out.

It's not even that she didn't wanna sleep with Frank, she was just nervous. Not even in a bad way, she just didn't wanna be terrible and fuck everything up. She knew that Frank wouldn't pressure her into it or anything, but she couldn't make this nervousness go away.

Gee definitely wanted to, though. She might be nervous, but she also thought about this all the time. Sometimes it felt like her skin was on fire with a burning desire, like she would die or be shunned from society if she didn't have sex.

Ever since the bathroom at summer camp, Gee had been desperate for more. She felt so alive when she had done that, like she was finally fulfilling her purpose in life. It was a fucked up feeling, but she didn't know what to do about it. She had had this itch since she was a child and she finally was starting to be able to scratch it, but it never seemed like it was enough. She constantly needed more- she needed it to feel human, needed it to be worthwhile.

She was so fucking pathetic.

Near the end of the skit, Gee caught Frank's eye and waved at him slightly, which apparently was a mistake because he ended up missing his line because he was distracted by her. Well, that's what he gets for making her all distractible and flustered by insinuating that he wanted sex that night.

By the time the skit was over, Gee was quickly heading across the street to where the game room was. Today was water games, so she knew that the kids would be a handful- especially since it's also the final day.

Gee was setting things up outside when Frank approached her, waving as he walked up. She waved back and grinned when he got over, saying, "Miss me already?"

"Ha ha," Frank rolled his eyes, then looked around before kissing her quickly. Gee blushed and got back to work setting the games up for the first group of kids. She was pretty sure Sisky's group was going first. God, that group was always hell.

She was busying herself with getting ready when she nonchalantly asked, "So, about tonight, how long do you want me to stay? A few hours or the whole night?"

She was trying to make it seem like casual conversation, but it probably was pretty obvious what she was trying to dig for. Frank just shrugged and replied with, "However long you want, I don't wanna pressure you."

Okay, now he is definitely talking about sex, right? God, why was it so hard to tell what people actually meant?

Sadly, she couldn't ask anymore questions, because Ray approached them saying, "Brace yourselves, we're about to have hell to deal with."

Correct to Ray's warning, Sisky's group came a minute later and Gee was immediately occupied with try to keep them in order. Sisky had to call three kids parents already and the day had barely started. Gee felt bad for Sisky, this must have been even worse for him than for Gee and Ray- and it was pretty fucking bad for Gee and Ray.

By the time that group had left, Gee had had enough with this day. She was so exhausted she could barely stand up without getting winded. Plus her goddamn knees were starting to hurt so that just made things worse. Frank, the absolute angel that he is, noticed that Gee was struggling and went to go get her coffee and a snack. Ray overheard this, though, so now Frank was basically just their errand boy. He didn't seem to mind, just shrugged and said something about how there was nothing better for him to do.

The next group was Jenna and Josh's, so obviously Gee had to corner Josh and give him the same talk she gave Pete when he had started dating. When Gee saw Josh's horrified face, she knew she had done well as a big sister. It's not like she even thought Josh or Pete were bad news, she just liked freaking them out slightly even she wasn't serious in the slightest. Ray noticed what Gee had done and gave her a high five after she walked back over to him.

Ray truly understood her. What a wonderful friend he was.

Luckily, Josh's group was actually pretty well behaved, so it actually was enjoyable working with them. At one point one of the kids got hit in the face with a water balloon, but that was the worst incident and it was an accident.

Soon enough, that group was leaving and Gee, Ray, and Frank had a bit of a break before the next group came. Plus, the next group was Mikey's, so that would be good- even if Tyler also had to be there.

The three of them just sat on the ground outside, drinking their coffees and talking about the day so far.

“I'm so fucking exhausted,” Gee sighed, wanting to be able to cuddle up closer to Frank. It was too public though, so she'd have to wait.

“Shit, me too. I don't know why, but I got like no sleep last night,” Ray said, stretching his arms over his head.

Frank laughed and shook his head, “No way, I also got no sleep. Have we all been exhausted this whole time?”

“Why do you think I kept spacing out during the skit?” Ray laughed, “I feel like I'm not sober. Like, everything is fucking hilarious. Remember when that kid fell earlier? It was so hard not to laugh, I was dying internally.”

“I get what you mean, although I honestly feel hung over. Everything is too bright and too loud and it all hurts. I just wanna scream and cry, but I'm an ‘responsible adult’ so I can't be ‘acting like a child,’ or whatever,” Gee laughed bitterly.

“Man, why are we all feeling drunk but like, without any of the good stuff.”

“Dude, what good stuff?” Gee asked, “Last time I got drunk it was hell.”

“That's just cause you drank way too much. You were like blackout drunk, babe. It's not surprising that you were a mess considering how much you drank,” Frank responded.

Ray laid down on his back, resting his head on his hands and giggled, asking, “Gee, fuck, remember when we were like 13 and got super drunk off of my dads like, fuck what was it?”

“I think it was whiskey.”

“Yeah! It was whiskey! We both thought it was disgusting, but we thought it'd be cool if we drank it so we didn't stop until we both had had way too much. God, we were fucking idiots.”

Gee laid down next to Ray, grinning as she asked, “Didn't we try climbing your trees? Man, we're lucky we didn't like accidentally kill ourselves, we were so fucking stupid. I feel like we should've at least gotten seriously injured.”

“Yeah, probably,” Ray laughed, than pushed himself so he was leaning back on his arms and asked Frank, “What was your first experience getting drunk like?”

Frank hummed and looked like he was thinking for a bit, before replying, “I think I was like 15, my friend invited me to a party and well, he was a bit older than me and so were all his friends, so there was a ton of booze and uh y’know, shit happens.”

“Do you remember any of it?” Gee asked, sitting back up to look at Frank.

“Vaguely? I remember not really wanting to be there and uh everyone was kinda pressuring me to drink, probably thinking it’d be funny to get the tiny 15 year old wasted. I think I threw up a lot? Like, a lot. It didn't help that I was sick that week so everything kinda got way worse. I'm not friends with that guy anymore, he was a dick.”

“He sounds like it,” Gee hummed, “I like your new friends better.”

Frank grinned, “Me too.”

Right then, Mikey's group approached the game area, so the three friends stood up and welcomed them to game time.

When Gee looked more closely at Mikey, she noticed that he looked upset. When she looked at him questioningly, he just shrugged her off and went to keep busy looking after the kids. Something was definitely up, she could tell. Most likely it had something to do with Tyler fucking Joesph, and Gee would figure it out.

When Mikey was finally more separated from the group, Gee went over to talk to him. He tensed up slightly when she walked over, meaning he obviously knew that she was gonna ask him what had happened. She stood next to him, acting casual as she asked, “So what did Tyler do?”

Mikey shifted nervously and shrugged, replying, “The usual, I guess.”

“So being a homophobic prick?”

“Yep, exactly.”

They went into silence for a bit, still just watching as the kids threw water balloons at each other and Frank- for some reason all the kids really liked to target him, Gee didn't get it. After a while, Mikey sighed and said, “We passed Josh earlier, so I smiled at him, y'know? But than Tyler immediately stepped in between the two of us, like he didn't want Josh to catch the gay, or whatever. It wasn't even that big of a thing, it just fucking hurts I guess. It's not too big of a deal, though. I shouldn't be so upset.”

Gee shrugged, “It's perfectly reasonable that you're upset, you have every right to be. You've been stuck with a bigoted asshole all week, it's only a matter of time before that completely wears you down.”

Mikey sighed, “Yeah, I guess.”

“Yo, Gee, we need you!” Frank called over. Gee gave Mikey a sympathetic pat on the shoulder before going over to where Frank was standing.

The rest of the game time flew by quickly, and next thing Gee knee all the volunteers were taking everything down, making the church go back to it's usual self. It always felt wrong taking all these things down, but she knew they couldn't just keep it up. It was just that all the volunteers had put so much effort into turning the church into a nautical paradise, it felt like it should last longer than just a week.

Gee was unstacking chairs in the sanctuary, hoping that she was putting them back in the correct places, when Frank came over and started to help her with this task. She could feel that he came over to say something, but he hadn't yet which was making her nervous. Why didn't he just say it already? It probably isn't anything to bad, right?

Gee glanced over at Frank to see that he was chewing his lip nervously as he unstacked the chairs, and now Gee was really nervous. What was Frank so nervous about? He rarely got nervous- at least, not this visibly.

After a bit, Gee couldn't take it. She leaned against one of the stacks of chairs and asked, “What's up?”

Frank shrugged, not looking at Gee directly when he replied, “Uhm, nothing.”

It was so obvious that he had something to say, so she just put her hand on his shoulder, asking, “Frank, why did you come over here? I know you wanna say something.”

Frank sighed, ran his fingers through his hair- something Gee noticed he did a lot more ever since they started dating- and replied, “Is what I asked earlier too much? Like, about you staying over. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable or whatever.”

Gee couldn't help giggling at this. Frank was so nice, what the fuck. How did she get so lucky?

Frank crossed his arms, “Why are you laughing?”

“Sorry! Sorry, I just- Frankie you're so sweet! But baby I promise that it's not too much. Even if we didn't y’know I'd still wanna come over, okay? I like spending time with you.”

Frank seemed to sigh in relief and started giggling himself. He shook his head and grinned, saying, “Fuck, I've been so worried that you were freaking out, I was about to just cancel and say that my parents randomly grounded me or some shit.”

Gee laughed and patted him on the shoulder, saying, “Nah, don't worry, you're good. I definitely want to come over, Frankie.”

“Really? Awesome!” Frank looked so happy that Gee actually wanted to hang out with him, it was adorable. He was like an excitable puppy or some shit. Gee shook her head, still grinning, and went back to putting all the chairs back in their original places.

It wasn't until she had to tell Mikey that he had to get a ride with Josh that it was setting in what going home with Frank meant. She was starting to get nervous again, but tried to just focus on driving and not freaking the fuck out. As Frank had said before, he wasn't going to pressure her or anything, but she was still nervous.

Although, as she got closer to Frank's house, it started feeling more like a giddy nervous instead of a shitty nervous. She started tapping her fingers rhythmically on the steering wheel as she drived, still trying to not freak out too much.

Shit, was she gonna sleep with Frank?

It's not like she had never done anything with him, just for some reason this seemed different. Maybe it was because all the other times were more spur of the momen impulses, while this seems more thought out, liek it was planned.

Hell, maybe she was just reading into things and they really were only gonna watch movies.

When they arrived at Frank's house, instead of going straight to Frank's room like they usually did, they stood in the living room in awkward silence. It was like they both knew what would happen if they went to Frank's room, but were both too awkward to actually initiate it. Gee cleared her throat and asked, “Can I go to the bathroom?”

Frank shrugged and scratched the back of his neck, replying, “Uhm yeah, go ahead.”

Gee nodded and headed towards his bathroom. She could hear his dogs in the wrestling in Frank's parents room as she walked past, and wondered momentarily if they actually were used to her at this point.

She got to the bathroom and locked herself in. She didn't even have to go, she just wanted a moment of privacy to try and get herself to stop being so awkward. She clutched at the sink and stared at herself in the mirror, mumbling, “God, you look like a mess.”

She did look like a mess. Her hair was all over the place, she had dark circles under her eyes, and she looked almost like an otherworldly being. How on earth did Frank like her? Unless he had some weird fetish for the undead that she doesn't know about, which is the most likely situation. She knew she couldn't stay in there all night, though, so she splashed her face with water before leaving to go back to the living room where Frank was.

Except Frank wasn't in the living room, which meant he had to be in his room, right? Gee started walking upstairs, getting less and less nervous the closer she got. She was stupid for being so nervous. She wanted this, Frank wanted this, so what was the problem?

Gee entered Frank's bedroom, seeing that Frank was in fact already there. He was sitting on his bed with his laptop in his lap, seemingly not have noticed that Gee was there. She walked over to the bed and sat beside him, then asked, “Whatcha doing?”

Frank jumped slightly, apparently still not having been aware that Gee was in the room with him until she spoke. He smiled at her when he realized who it was and replied, “I was about to play music.”

“Oh, cool,” Gee said, smiling back at him.

Frank put his laptop on the desk near his bed, it playing some hardcore band that sounded vaguely familiar to Gee but she couldn't quite place it. She moved closer to Frank, not really sure what she was supposed to do in this situation. Frank seemed confused too- or maybe just awkward, Gee wasn’t sure. What she was sure of was nothing would happen if neither of them did anything like this, so she knew she had to suck it up and do something.

She moved even closer to Frank and rested her hand on his knee, looking at him to make sure this was okay. He just stared at her hand like it was a mysterious object that Frank didn't know about. Gee was about to pull away her hand, maybe mutter an apology for misreading the situation, but Frank grabbed her wrist, keeping it where it was.

Gee bit her lip and looked at Frank. He still seemed a bit nervous, but had more of an air of confidence around him. He leaned in closer and kisses Gee softly, moving his hand to rest it on the back of her neck.

Gee kissed back and moved her hand to rest it on Frank's waist. It seemed like once Frank kissed her, all of the awkward tension left and all that was left was two horny teenagers who really, really liked each other. Really that's a combination that never turns out well.

Gee wasn't thinking of that, though. She was just thinking about how much she wanted Frank. He had moved even closer to her now and pushed her onto her back. She hummed and ran her fingers through Frank's hair, than moved her hands down his back, touching as much of him that she could.

They stayed like that for a while, kissing and slowly winding each other up. Gee felt like she was in heaven. Every time they did this it felt just as amazing as the first time they did. Gee was in love with this feeling. Gee was in love with-

Her train of thought was stopped when Frank tugged on her shirt slightly and asked, “Can I take this off babe?”

Gee giggled and replied, “Only if you take yours off too.”

Frank grinned and sat up, kneeling between Gee’s legs as he pulled his shirt off. He than started pulling up Gee’s shirt, and she sat up a bit and helped him pull it off.

Gee always was a bit nervous those first few moments where she started taking off her clothes. Frank always would look at her owth this... this look that always made her either want to cover herself up or just melt completely. She tried to distract herself by pulling Frank back down and kissing him deeply, not wanting to get freaked out when she wanted him so badly.

Everything started getting more intense. Usually at this point one or both of them would freak out and pull away, saying some excuse that would stop things in their tracks. But not this time. No, this time neither of them were stopping and it was thrilling to Gee. She didn't even realize fully how turned on she was until Frank started kissing along her neck and running his hand up and down her thigh. Everything seemed to be amplified now, and she just needed.

Frank moved his hand and was about to start taking off her pants when he hesitated. Gee put her hand on his arm and asked, “Everything alright babe?”

Frank shook his head and laughed slightly, saying, “Yeah I just- I'm scared it won't be good for you.”

Gee pulled him down for a kiss, before mumbling, “I promise I'll tell you if it's not good or if I want you to stop or do something different or- or anything, okay?”

“Yeah, okay. Just- I don't know. I'm probably gonna suck.”

“Well, duh,” Gee giggled, “I mean, I'm gonna suck too, most likely. We'll both suck. It'll be a great bonding experience.”

Frank buried his face in Gee’s neck and started laughing, saying, “You're ridiculous, baby.”

Gee grinned and patted Frank's head, “You are too, love.”

Frank sat back up, grinning widely at Gee and going back to taking off her pants, stopping for a second to ask, “Wait, you do want this, right?”

“Yes, I promise I do, Frankie. Now, back to work. Chop chop!” She clapped her hands together for emphasis, and Frank just rolled his eyes and said, “Well of course, your majesty.”

Gee was laughing as she helped Frank take off her pants, but stopped suddenly when Frank started mouthing at her inner thigh. She bit her lip and watched him closely, suddenly remembering what exactly is gonna happen. Frank was about to pull off her underwear when he looked up and asked, “Good?”

Gee nodded rapidly and replied, “Yeah, definitely good.”

Frank nodded and started pulling them off, still looking up at Gee as he did so. She was biting her lip hard as she watched him, already so turned on and they barely had even started.

Frank went back to mouthing at her inner thigh, before looking back up at her as he took her cock into his mouth. Gee gasped, still kind of amazed that Frank actually liked her enough to do this. She was actually more just really fucking confused that someone as great as Frank liked her, but as Mikey always said: “that's ‘cause you're an insecure piece of shit.” Wise words indeed.

Frank just did that for a while, going slow to make Gee desperate. She didn't even realize how much she needed that until Frank suddenly stopped, making her let out a soft whine from the loss of contact. Frank smirked down at her- definitely having lost all his awkwardness- and said, “What? I didn't invite you over just to do that, y’know.”

“I know, Frankie, I just wasn't expecting it.”

“I know, babygirl,” Frank moved up and kissed her deeply, before moving off of the bed, much to Gee’s displeasure. When she gave him a questioning look, Frank laughed and said, “I'm not gonna fuck you without lube or condoms, babe.”

Ah, of course.

Gee was an idiot.

She watched him going through his drawers, before coming back over to her holding a bottle of lube and a condom. He kissed her again before grinning and saying, “Thank god I have chill parents.”

“God bless,” Gee giggled.

“I don't think God is blessing this like, at all but okay.”

“Why not? I see absolutely nothing sinful about this situation. This is the most sinless situation ever. We are both literally completely sinless, Frankie.”

“Okay well now I'm pretty sure you're just being blasphemous, but alright,” Frank laughed.

“Eh, who cares. I'll blaspheme and get fucked in the same breath, who cares. I do what I want, motherfucker,” Gee said, before flipping off the ceiling were God totally was, obviously.

Frank kissed Gee and mumbled, “You're ridiculous.”

“Mhm. Now c’mon, I'm getting impatient.”

“Such a needy girl,” Frank said teasingly, before opening the bottle of lube and poured some on his fingers. He than went back to kneeling between Gee’s legs and bit his lip nervously as he slowly pushed it inside of her.

So that was a weird feeling.

Gee couldn't really place how it felt, but it was just weird. She mostly was judt confused by it, not even really feeling it at all. Frank looked at her with concern and asked, “Is this okay?”

“Yeah, it's just weird,” She replied.

“Okay, just don't be afraid to stop me if it's too much,” Frank said, smiling slightly. He than bit his lip and started moving his finger more and ohh, okay. Now she actually could feel it. She still couldn't tell if it was a good or bad feeling, but at least the feeling was actually there. She almost wanted him to do more already just so she could actually feel something, even if it was painful.

Gee smiled up at him slightly and said, “I think you can do more, baby.”

“Already?” Frank asked, sounding surprised.

“Yeah, already. I promise I'll tell you if it's too much.”

Frank just shrugged, than slowly pushed in a second finger. Now it was starting to hurt, and Gee involuntarily winced when he first pushed his finger in. Frank immediately pulled his fingers out, looking panicked as he said, “Oh god I hurt you, didn't I?”

Gee sat up and put her hand on Frank's shoulder, trying to calm him down as she said, “Hey, baby, I promise it's okay. Yes, it did hurt a bit, but it wasn't too much. I just wasn't expecting it, but I promise you're okay. It's just a normal hurt, alright? No need to stop.”

“Okay, okay. Fuck, sorry for freaking out, I'm just really scared that this will be awful for you, so I'm a bit jumpy.”

Gee squeezed his shoulder slightly, before saying, “I know, but I promise it'll be okay. We don't even have to do this if you're too nervous.”

“No, no I wanna do this, trust me. I am nervous, but that'll probably go away once we starting getting more into it, I just have to get past this initial stuff. I'll be fine, though.”

“Okay, cool. Just don't be afraid to stop, alright? You've said that to me a lot, so now I gotta say it to you. I won't get upset or anything if you need to stop.”

“Cool,” Frank said, then started laughing. Gee gave him a confused look, and he added, “I’m never this nervous, what the fuck.”

Gee started laughing too and said, “Welcome to my world, asshole.”

Frank grinned amd kissed gee deeply, than slowly pushed his fingers back inside her. She bit her lip, trying to get used to the pain. It wasn't too bad, but ut was definitely there. Frank was obviously going slow, but she still was wondering how she would be able to take him if only two fingers was hurting.

But then it was starting to hurt less, and it dawned on Gee that she actually was wanting even more. Maybe this wouldn't be too much afterall. She told Frank that she wanted more, and he obliged. This was really hurting now. Yes, she had gotten used to two fingers, but now that the third one was there it was starting to get to be too much.

She didn't want to stop, though. She had gotten this far, there's no fucking way she was stopping now. Plus, even if it did hurt quite a bit, it also felt really, really good. The good and the bad were even enough that she knew she would be able to deal with the pain if it meant she got the good parts too.

After a while, Gee wanted even more. She wanted Frank. She was already falling apart, gasping and panting as Frank fucked her with his fingers, but she needed more. This was only barely touching what she needed, so she started asking Frank to fuck her. Her words weren't exactly the most coherent, but thankfully Frank seemed to get what she was saying when she reached forward and tried taking his pants off.

“Oh, yeah, fuck yeah, okay,” Frank mumbled as Gee looked at him desperately. She was breathing heavily and her heart was racing and fuck, she needed Frank right that second, please.

Frank pulled his fingers out of her, making her let out a whine and stare up at him desperately. He kissed her deeply, before taking his pants off completely and throwing them off of the bed. Gee watched as he fumbled to get the confom out of the packaging, then helping him put it onto his cock. He poured more lube onto his hand before stroking himself. Gee watched him with wide eyes, so transfixed by how fucking attractive he was that she couldn't tear her eyes away.

Frank stopped stroking himself and put his hand on Gee’s leg, making her spread them even more for him. Gee bit her lip and watched as he moved between her legs, positioning himself before he slowly pushed his cock inside of her.

Fuck, that hurt. She felt like she was being stretched wide and god it was overwhelming. She almost was afraid that she wouldn't be able to handle it, but the noise Frank made and the look on his face made it so worth it.

He started to move, still going slow but at least it was something different. Gee was getting more used to it the more he moved, and suddenly it started actually feeling really fucking good. It still hurt, but now she was able to ignore it better and just focus on the good.

Frank was moaning softly as he fucked her, his eyes closed and his face a picture of bliss. Gee couldn't help moaning just from looking at him, he looked heavenly.

If this wasn't allowed in Heaven, than Gee wasn't sure if she ever wanted to go there.

Frank kissed her again deeply, before mumbling, “This good baby?”

Gee nodded her head and hummed, replying, “Yeah baby it's good. Can't believe you're actually fucking me. This is like a dream come true.”

Frank let out a breathy laugh and asked, “Is being fucked your dream or being fucked specifically by me?”

“Mm, both.”

Frank grinned, “Are you saying you see me in your dreams babe?”

“Maybe,” Gee laughed, rolling her eyes.

“Awh, babe! That's adorable!”

“It's adorable that I've had sex dreams about you?”

“Yes, yes it is,” Frank kisses her cheek and added, “If it makes you feel better I've had sex dreams about you too.”

“Awh, look who's adorable now!”

“Can I be adorable when I currently have my cock inside of you?”

“Well, duh,” Gee giggled.

“This is it, I finally have peaked. 17 years old and I can't get any better than this.”

“Aw, babe, you totally can get better than this! Just like, I don't know, grow up to fight an evil corporation or something. Completely wreck capitalism, babe, then you'll finally be a better version of yourself.”

“Y’know, off topic but I never thought I'd start discussing how to better myself while having sex for the first time.”

Gee laughed and ran her fingers through Frank's hair, “That's because you hadn't met me yet.”

“Well, now I know you're still a talkative motherfucker even if I'm fucking you.”

“In my defense, you haven't moved or done anything in like five minutes so obviously I have to fill this space with words instead of awkward silence.”

“I haven't moved because I've been distracted by you talking!” Frank laughed.

“Well then gag me.”

“Wait really?” Frank said, sounding surprised.

“Uh, yeah sure. Why not?” Gee blushed.

“Yeah, uhm, okay,” Frank replied, then added, “What can I gag you with?”

“Anything but cloth. I can't stand the feeling of cloth against my teeth. Makes me want to die- or maybe just throw up. Either way it's not pleasant.”

Frank laughed, “Yeah, okay, I won't make it cloth. I’m not sure what else to use though?”

“Okay, this is gonna sound really not sexy, but you can roll up an old bag of Doritos and shove it in my mouth.”

“Wow, you’re right, that is really not sexy.”

Gee giggled and hid her face in her hands, before saying, “Listen, the crinkly material feels great in my mouth and also it's big enough that it could work well as a gag. Just- just do it, babe. I saw a bag on the floor when I came in here, use that.”

Frank shrugged and say up, saying, “I mean, if you're cool with it than I don't see why not.”

Gee watched as Frank got off the bed and looked around the floor until he found the bag. He picked it up, laughing to himself and mumbling, “You're so ridiculous, babe.”

“I may be ridiculous but you're the one who wants to sleep with me.”

Frank got back onto the bed and kneeled between Gee’s legs, saying, “That's because, even if you are ridiculous, you're also ridiculously hot.”

“You're such a sweet talker, Frankie. You're gonna make me blush.”

“Good,” Frank giggled, than leaned down and kissed Gee’s cheek. He than sat back up and shook his head, laughing to himself as he rolled up the empty bag of Doritos and put it in Gees mouth. She had to keep herself from laughing too because this was such a weird setup and man, she would have so much to tell Mikey. Well, maybe not the details, but she would have to tell some of what happened. This was too hilarious to not tell Mikey.

Frank leaned back down and kissed Gees cheek again, before mumbling, “Feel free to take that out if you change your mind about being gagged.”

Gee nodded in response and watched as Frank positioned himself back in between her, before pushing back inside her. Gee let out a slight pained noise, but nodded at him to keep going. He started to move inside her again and she hummed and closed her eyes. It felt good, but the best part of this was definitely how into this Frank was. He kept moaning and whispering praises into Gees ear and fuck it was hot. She definitely couldn't get off just from this, but she also definitely wanted to do this more often. She liked having someone else getting off because of her.

Next thing she knew, Frank was mumbling something about how he was gonna cum and it was over. She was kinda disappointed that it was already over, but also was kinda happy because she was starting to get sore. She definitely was gonna be feeling this for a while.

Frank took the bag of Doritos out of her mouth and kisses her before saying, “Mm, want me to go down on you baby?”

Gee was breathing heavily and just nodded in response. She felt ridiculous for being so fatigued from sex, but that's just the way it is, apparently.

Frank started kissing down her chest and Gee watches him intently. She was so happy to have Frank, he always made her feel so good. Not even just in the sex aspect, but in general he did. It was way more than she ever thought she could get, and she felt unbelievably lucky to have him.

It didn't take long for Frank to make her cum too, and soon enough he was moving back up her body and kissing her softly. Gee smiled and cuddled up close to him, holding him tight against her chest. Frank kissed her cheek and asked, “How was that for you?”

Gee smiled and replied, “It was good. How about for you?”

“Really good,” Frank giggled.

Gee grinned, “Yeah? So was your first time what you expected?”

“Oh, not at all. There was way more talking than I expected, and also way more empty bags of Doritos.”

“Hey, you were the one who said I was talking too much.”

“Nah, I didn't mind it, it's just ridiculous. Also, I didn't even remember that that bag was on my floor, so it's probably really old and disgusting, just letting you know.”

Gee started laughing more and said, “Oh, you didn't think to tell me that before I put it in my mouth?”

“What? Like you would've cared anyway!”

“Okay, maybe but still!”

Frank started laughing too and buried his face in Gee’s neck, giggling uncontrollably. Gee laughed too and held Frank close, feeling giddy and bubbly and just happy.

They spent the rest of the night watching TV, and then fell asleep holding each other close and feeling calm.

\----------

Gee left Frank's house early in the afternoon, although somewhat reluctantly. She wanted to stay with him forever, but she promised her parents she'd be back before 1 PM, so she had to leave. She kisses him a lot of times, before finally leaving to drive home.

Gee got home and immediately went to Mikey's room, but was surprised when he wasn't there. She ended up finding him in the kitchen where he was making coffee. She got up onto the counter and watched quietly as Mikey poured himself a cup of coffee.

Mikey took a sip of his coffee, than placed it down on the counter and looked at Gee, asking, “So how was your sleepover with Frank?”

Gee grinned widely and replied, “I'm glad you asked! It was well... it was really good. Like, so great. We broke like thirty rules, at least. It was wonderful.”

Mikey raised his eyebrow, “What sort of rules?”

“We totally had sex!” Gee whispered excitedly.

“Of course you did,” Mikey laughed.

“Listen, it was great. Like, so amazing. Frank is so great, Mikey. I love that man.”

“Ohh you love him?” Mikey smirked, taking a sip of his coffee.

Gee blushed crimson, “I- I didn't say that!”

“Oh yes you did.”

“No I didn't! Shut up.”

Mikey just laughed, took his coffee mug, and left the kitchen. Gee jumped off the counter and followed him to his room, where she than plopped onto his bed and hid her grinning face in the pillow. Mikey sat beside her on the bed and patted her head, saying, “So how was your first time.”

Gee rolled over onto her back, grinning up at Mikey as she replied, saying, “It was great. Although, I kept talking and we had like, three conversations while it happened. He also gagged me with an empty bag of Doritos.”

Mikey choked on his coffee, then burst out laughing and asked, “He did what?”

“I was talking too much! Neither of us could actually focus on the sex thing because I was talking too much so, y’know, I suggested he gag me.”

“But why did he use a bag of Doritos?”

“An empty bag of Doritos,” Gee corrected, before continuing, “But there was nothing better to use, obviously.”

“I can still mock you for it, though.”

“Can we just talk about the fact that I totally got laid last night? All my dreams are coming true, Mikey.”

“All your dreams are just having sex with Frank? You need better dreams.”

Gee rolled her eyes, “I have other dreams too, asshole.”

“What? You were the one who said ‘all my dreams are coming true.’ I was just saying you need better dreams.”

“Dude, I'm just happy I found someone who's actually attracted to me. Like, attracted to me enough to actually want to have sex with me. Attracted to me enough to want to-”

“Y’know,” Mikey interrupted, “I don't think I wanna know where you're going with that.”

“I was just gonna say to go down on me!”

“Okay, that's it, out! Out of my room,” Mikey said, shoving Gee off of his bed while she laughed.

“What? Did I say something?”

“You know what you did!”

“At least I didn't fuck Frank in your bed.”

“Oh my god, this again? Really?”

“I never forget, Mikey!”

Mikey snorted, “You're constantly forgetting things, Gee.”

“Shh, that's irrelevant. I will leave, though. Not because of you, I just wanna text Frank. Or maybe sleep. Or both. Doesn't matter! But I'll leave you alone, so bye,” Gee grinned at Mikey one last time, before leaving to go to her room. She flopped down on her bed, grinning widely and still giddy from last night.

She actually felt good about herself, like she was fulfilling her purpose in life. It might be a fucked up feeling, but it just felt right. Like all her life was leading to this, like this was the only good thing she could do with herself. The only way she could be useful.

Gee ended up drifting off to sleep for a nap, still tired from the night. She fell asleep thinking about Frank and how her purpose in life was finally obvious to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gee? a self insert of me, the author? never! that is absolutely RIDICULOUS
> 
> as always feel free to comment/leave kudos and also hmu on tumblr (@queercassianandor), twitter (@Allegrcat), instagram (artsy_vampire), and/or snapchat (artsy_vampire)
> 
> have a nice day!!!


	24. John 13:34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley propped her head up on her hand and said, “We should name this little group we have.”
> 
> “Oh, I agree!” Josh replied, looking excited.
> 
> “Wait,” Pete started, “We’re all bi, right?”
> 
> Mikey nodded, looking around at everyone in the room, “I believe so. Why?”
> 
> “We should be The Bi Man Group,” Pete replied with a grin, “Get it? It's like The Blue Man Group, except instead of us being covered in blue we’re just all bisexual.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the second to last chapter...... dun dun DUNN
> 
> okay but really this is so weird I didn't think I'd actually like. Get this far i mean? i hoped i would but this is still WEIRD
> 
> anyways i hope u like the chapter :^)

With V.B.S. past them, there was only one thing left that would signal the end of summer: the churches annual talent show. Everyone in the church usually had something to do, even if it was something small. Mikey hadn't participated in a few years, but this time he was actually excited about it.

This mostly was because he would be doing his "talent" with Pete and Josh. They were going to play a song- Josh on the drums, Mikey on guitar, and Pete on bass- but they still had to figure out what song. Also who would be singing.

"Maybe Hayley would wanna do it with us?" Mikey asked, laying with his head on Josh's chest. They were at Josh's house trying to plan things for the talent show, but mostly they were just using that as an excuse to hang out together.

"Nah, she's doing something with Ariel," Pete replied, stroking Mikey's hair lazily while also cuddled up into Josh's side.

"Oh, bummer," Mikey liked hanging out with Hayley, she was really cool. He always forgot to actually hang out with her outside of youth group, which was a shame. She was such a fun person to be around. He made a mental note to ask her to hang out sometime.

"Wait, shit, guys. I know the perfect person," Josh said, sounding excited.

Mikey looked up at him, saying, "Well, go on, tell us who it is."

"Ashley!"

"You mean Ashley the 'blue haired angel' that you broke up with?" Pete asked.

Josh rolled his eyes, "I didn't break up with her, we mutually broke up. But yes, that Ashley. She has a gorgeous voice and would probably love to do this. Plus, I haven't hung out with her in a while which sucks. She's a really cool girl.”

“Well, sure, why not? You should text her like, right now. I'm impatient, also we need to start figuring out what song we're doing and practicing and shit ‘cause this thing is at the end of the month.”

“Mikey, why are you the most responsible out of the three of us?” Pete asked, poking Mikey's head repeatedly.

“I'm pretty sure Josh is the most responsible, but okay.”

“Alright, I just texted her,” Josh said before Pete could get in another reply, “I'll tell you whenever she texts back.”

It did not take long for her to text back, and an hour later she was now joining them on Josh's bed. The boys were still sitting close together, but no where near as cuddled up ad before. Mikey felt weird about this, since Josh and Ashley were exes, but she was chill enough that he didn't really mind. He mostly was just hoping it wasn't awkward for either of them.

Ashley’s hair was much shorter now, but still the vivid blue that Mikey remembered. He kinda wished he could pull off dyeing his hair an unusual color, but he didn't think it would fit him. Plus, he was pretty lazy. If he did ever dye his hair, it'd most likely be from impulse, which probably wasn't the best idea. Although, that is how Pete always does his hair, so maybe it could work.

“So, what's up? Like, what song are we gonna be playing? Do you know yet?” Ashley asked, running fingers through her hair lightly and smiling.

“Uh, we haven't picked one yet,” Josh replied sheepishly.

Ashley shrugged, “That's cool. I'll just help with the picking process. Okay, new question, what sort of song do you wanna do?”

“One that we all know, probably,” Mikey replied, than added, “Or at least one we can all learn easily. Also, one that includes all three of the instruments that we'll be playing, so nothing too low-key acoustic.”

“I suggest we do a Vesperteen song,” Josh said.

Pete laughed, “Of course you do.”

“Which one though?” Mikey asked.

“What We Could Have Been!” Josh said with a grin.

“Babe,” Pete started, putting his hand on Josh's shoulder, “We can't go on stage and have Ashley say fuck in front of the entire church.”

“Ah shit, I forgot there was cursing in that song.”

“Also, I don't know that song,” Ashley added.

The three boys gaped at her, Josh the most looking the most surprised. He tilted his head in confusion and asked, “Didn't I show you?”

“I don't think so?”

“Well what the fuck, I gotta show you now. Pete, move your leg so I can get up and grab my laptop.”

Pete stuck his tongue out at Josh, but moved his leg from where it was tangled with Josh's legs and let him get up. Mikey moved closer to Pete, where Josh had been sitting, and wrapped his arm around Pete's waist. Josh turned back to them and huffed out in annoyance when he saw Mikey had taken his place. Mikey just grinned at him as he walked back over and hoped he wasn't actually annoyed.

Josh sat back on the bed and started playing the song, letting Ashley watch the video as he turned back towards Mikey and Pete.

“So, this song is scratched off as an idea, but which one should we do?”

“Maybe Shatter in the Night? That one is also amazing, except it doesn't have the curse words. Plus, I totally have listened to it enough so I can play it on the guitar- even if it isn't technically ‘correct.’” Mikey said, than reached his hand out and pulled Josh closer to him. Mikey needed to be sandwiched by cute boys, goddammit.

Josh giggled and snuggled close to Mikey, saying, “That's true, plus I know all the drum parts of it. We definitely should do that one.”

“Also, I actually know that one,” Ashley said, before pushing the laptop away from her when the song ended, “By the way, that video was adorable. The song was great too.”

“I knew you'd like it!” Josh grinned, “But yes, it's settled, we're doing Shatter in the Night.”

\----------

They ended up practicing once a week, wanting to make sure they were ready at the end of the month. Practices were fun, them all getting together to play music and just hang out too. They all happened at Josh’s house, because that's where his drum set was and none of them wanted to move it unless they had to. He also just had the biggest garage, which made for a great practice space.

Mikey was having so much fun playing with them. Sometimes they didn't only play Shatter in the Night, they’d play other songs too. He almost was feeling like they were an actual band, even if they were only doing this for the talent show.

Also, Josh was right, Ashley’s voice was gorgeous. It was perfect for the song too, so Mikey really didn't mind having to hear her singing the same thing over and over again. He kept meaning to ask her if she had had lessons or something, because this seemed too good to just be natural.

Maybe it was actually a supernaturally good voice. It would explain a lot.

Mikey just felt happy doing this, to just play music and look around the room and see his two best friends/boyfriends also playing with him, having them grin widely whenever he looked at them. Sometimes, when they were just goofing around, Pete would come over and play up close to Mikey, getting in his personal space. He also had tried to kiss Mikey a few times while they were playing, but their hands would just smack against each other and both the guitar and bass would make weird noises.

Mikey knew not to hope for this- this band thing to go anywhere, but he was definitely gonna love it while it lasted (even if it did only last a month).

He also was definitely hoping it'd go further than just this talent show, but he was too nervous to bring it up just in case everyone else hated the idea of playing with each other indefinitely. Maybe he could slowly start implying he wanted to start an actual band with them, so the seed would be in their heads already if he ever did bring it up.

One practice, that was only a week and a half away from the talent show, they were taking a break from playing and sitting around in Josh's living room. Ashley propped her head up on her hand and said, “We should name this little group we have.”

“Oh, I agree!” Josh replied, looking excited.

“Wait,” Pete started, “We’re all bi, right?”

Mikey nodded, looking around at everyone in the room, “I believe so. Why?”

“We should be The Bi Man Group,” Pete replied with a grin, “Get it? It's like The Blue Man Group, except instead of us being covered in blue we’re just all bisexual.”

“Babe, why are you like this?” Josh asked, laughing a bit.

“Why am I a genius? Not sure, ask my mother.”

Josh rolled his eyes, “You know what I mean.”

“Okay, I gotta admit, that is a pretty hilarious name,” Pete interrupted Ashley to give her a high five, before letting her continue, “But the one problem is: literally none of your parents would be fine with that.”

“Josh's mom might be,” Mikey piped up, “She’s gotten weirdly liberal ever since she found out Josh was bi.”

“Hm, that's true. But neither Pete's or your mom, Mikey, would let you get away with that, even if Josh's would. So, any other ideas?”

“Death by Glitter?” Mikey suggested.

“That sounds like how Gee’s gonna die,” Pete pointed out.

“But it's still a great name and you know it.”

“I agree, lets go with that one,” Ashley said, “Except now I'm gonna have to wear that one sparkly dress I own. Josh, you know the one.”

“The short and kinda tight silver one? Ash, you’re gonna make us all look like we crawled out of a dumpster if you wear that one.”

“Exactly! It’ll be great!”

Mikey laughed, “Death by Glitter it is, then.”

“I still think we should do The Bi Man Group,” Pete grumbled.

“We can't, babe, people will yell,” Mikey said, patting Pete on the shoulder.

“Fiinee, Death by Glitter works too.”

“Okay, I feel like I can't be the only one thinking this,” Ashley started, “But is this gonna continue on after the talent show? ‘Cause I'm fine either way, I just think it’d be pretty cool to actually be in a band. I even can write music, if need be.”

Mikey perked up at this, not expecting anyone else to bring this up- even if he had been thinking of this constantly ever since they started doing this. He wanted this so bad, but he tried to clamp down the excitement just in case the others weren't as enthusiastic about this idea as him.

Although, when he looked around at the others, Pete and Josh also looked excited at Ashley's question. Mikey was now starting to wonder if this would actually happen.

He really, really hoped it did.

“I also can write music,” Pete said, “Or, well, mostly lyrics. But whatever, same thing.”

“Wait, so are we gonna be in like, an actual band together?” Josh asked, looking around at the others excitedly.

“I fucking hope so!” Mikey replied, grinning widely. He couldn't believe this! He was gonna be in a band! He couldn't wait to tell Gee, she'd be so excited for him. He would tell her first thing when he got home that night.

“Okay, okay, this is so awesome. I've always wanted to be in a band!” Pete grinned, “I've asked Patrick a few times, but he said no. Something about that being too much of a spotlight on him, even though I said he could just be the drummer, but whatever. Anyways, I'm really glad you guys want this. I'm fucking pumped already.”

“Me too!” Ashley said happily, “But, we should worry about like, original stuff later. We still gotta get Shatter in the Night down.”

“We basically have it already,” Mikey pointed out.

“Yeah, but Pete's slow on the second verse.”

“Hey, I'm doing better with that!” Pete said defensively.

“But you still don't have it,” Ashley responded, rolling her eyes at Pete.

Josh reached over and patted Pete's knee, “It's okay babe, you've almost got it.”

“But not quite,” Mikey said teasingly.

“Betrayed by my love once more...”

Mikey and Ashley laughed as Josh comforted Pete, who was flipping them both off. Mikey was excited at the prospect of being a band with these three. They already played so well together, even if they only have played covers so far. He just hadn't expected this when they first decided to do the talent show together, but fuck was he happy. Technically him and Pete had had a band before, but they were like seven and that had definitely not counted.

He didn't even care if they played shows or anything- although that would be pretty cool. No, he mostly just wanted this so he could write music and play it with his friends. He technically had written some lyrics, but he always was too embarrassed to show anyone. Maybe he could just start with showing Pete and Josh, and than show Ashley if the others thought they weren't completely trash.

The doorbell rang suddenly, startling Mikey out of his thoughts. He looked around at the other three kids, but they all looked confused. Josh shrugged and got up to check the door, saying, “It's probably a mail man or something.”

Mikey couldn't see what was going on, but he heard Tyler saying, “Josh! Hey, you busy?”

Mikey froze up at hearing Tyler, he obviously hadn't been expecting that. He looked around the room and Pete looked shocked too, while Ashley just looked pissed off. Mikey could relate, he also got pissed off just at the sound of Tyler's voice.

“Uhm, yeah, I kinda am busy,” Josh replied, sounding a lot more pissy than Mikey expected. He figured Josh was still trying to do the whole “don't hate me Tyler” thing, but maybe not.

“Oh, with what? Can I come back later?” Tyler asked, sounding disappointed.

“No, I have people over.”

“Can I come when they leave?”

“I don't want to hang out with you, Tyler!” Josh suddenly yelled, startling Mikey all over again. Everything seemed to get eerily quiet after that, Mikey feeling like he couldn't breath. Neither Ashley nor Pete seemed to be expecting that either, and they just gaped at each other in surprise.

“You're hanging out with Pete and Mikey again, aren't you?” Tyler asked quietly. Mikey didn't hear a response from Josh, but next thing he knew Tyler was stomping into the living room and Josh was yelling at him to leave.

Tyler was glaring at Mikey, shooting him a venomous stare that made Mikey want to hide, but instead he sat up straight and tried to seem calm. Tyler pointed at him and said, “You fags ruined my friendship with Josh!”

Josh came stomping into the room behind Tyler and grabbed him by the shoulder, spinning him around so he could punch him in the face. Mikey stood up suddenly, watching with horrifying satisfaction as Tyler’s nose started bleeding from where Josh had punched him. Ashley looked impressed, but also incredibly surprised that Josh actually did that.

Josh pulled Tyler closer by his shirt collar and said, “They didn't ruin our friendship, you did! You ruined it by being a homophobic prick who fucked everything up for my two other closest friends. I have had enough of your bullshit, Tyler. You goddamn stuck up, prissy son of a bitch! You think you can get away with this shit just because you're a Christian? Because you can't! If you are being an awful person, than guess what! You're gonna lose your fucking best friend, that's the way this works. I have had enough with defending you constantly, and I have had enough of you! Stop coming by my house randomly, stop talking to me at church, and stop fucking harassing my closest friends!”

Tyler looked like he had been punched in the face yet again. He was staring at Josh wide eyed, his mouth hanging open like he wanted to say something but he had no more words. No one else in the room dared say anything, this wasn't their fight anymore.

“Fine, have it your way, Josh. I'll go out of your life, if that's what you want. But y’know, you could've just talked to me about this forever ago, instead of waiting until months after ignoring me and punching me in the face.”

“Oh don't pull that shit! I did try talking to you! I talked to you so many times after the New Years Eve party, you just wouldn't listen! You're so set in your goddamn ways that you couldn't see that it was pushing everyone away! Notice how the only person who talks to you anymore is Jenna? There's a fucking reason for that. Everyone hates you, Tyler! Nobody gives a damn about you ever since you showed that you're actually just a fucking bully!”

Something seemed to snap in Tyler and he lunges forward, punching Josh in the face. Before Mikey knew what was happening, Pete and Ashley were dragging Tyler out of the house. Mikey snapped out of his daze and went to Josh, who was sitting curled up on himself on the ground. Mikey placed his hand on Josh's shoulder and mumbled, “You okay?”

Josh shook his head no, so Mikey say down in front of him and pulled him into a tight hug. Pete and Ashley came back, neither of them looking too pleased about what Tyler had just done. Pete also sat down near Josh, wrapping his arms around the other boy so he was now in a comfort caccoon.

“I think I'm gonna leave,” Ashley said, “This has been... a lot and you three probably wanna be alone. I'll see you next practice, guys.”

Josh looked up at her and smiled slightly, saying, “Bye, Ash. Sorry all this happened, I uhm definitely wasn't expecting it.”

“Don't worry about it,” Ashley shrugged, “I doubt you wanted it to happen either. It's just been a long day, you guys deserve some alone time. See you later.”

They all waved her goodbye, Mikey watching as she left the living room and headed out of the house. Josh sighed and put his hand to his nose, than pulled it away and said, “Shit, I’m bleeding. I uhm, I probably should clean that up before my mom gets home.”

“You want us to stay?” Pete asked, looking concerned for Josh.

Josh smiled at him, “Yeah, please? I don't really wanna be alone right now.”

“We’ll stay than,” Mikey kissed Josh on the cheek softly, before adding, “Do you want me to text my parents if I can stay over the night?”

Josh nodded, “Yeah, I’d like that. Can you stay too Pete?”

“I can definitely ask,” Pete replied with a smile.

\----------

Both Pete and Mikey were able to stay over with Josh, which Mikey was thankful for. He knew that, even though Josh had stopped being friends with Tyler forever ago, it still probably hurt for all that to actually happen. Mikey was still shocked by all of the events himself, and they weren't happening directly to him. He could only imagine how Josh was feeling.

Mikey and Pete were trying their best to make Josh feel better, mostly just by cuddling with him while they watched all his favorite movies. He had been very quiet ever since earlier, which was understandable. Mikey just wished he could do more to help.

At one point, Josh's mom came into his room to ask what they wanted for dinner and Mikey had a brief panic because the three boys were cuddled up together on Josh's bed. He then remembered that she was surprisingly okay with them, which Mikey would still be confused about no matter how many times she has shown her support.

Before she left, she stopped in the doorway to say, “Oh, Josh, Tyler's mom called earlier. She said Tyler was gonna stop by here, what happened with that? Did things work out?”

“He called Pete and Mikey fags and I punched him in the face,” Josh replied bluntly.

She put her hands on her hips and shook her head, saying, “Did you really have to go the violent route? You could've just talked!”

“I've tried talking to him, though! He doesn't listen!”

“That doesn't mean you should punch him!”

“He punched me too though!”

“Y’know what? I'm not gonna discuss this anymore while you still have guests over. Be happy I'm not sending them home, Joshua,” She finally left after that, closing the door behind her as she went. Josh sighed and curled in on himself, not looking at Mikey or Pete.

Mikey started stroking Josh's hair softly, trying to comfort him. Josh sighed again and looked up at Mikey, mumbling, “I probably should apologize to my mom.”

“Yeah, probably,” Mikey replied quietly. Josh sat up on the bed, the blood around his nose mostly gone now, only small remnants of dried blood left. Mikey figured he should probably clean that up, but decided now wasn't a good time to mention it. He watches as Josh got off the bed and left the room, leaving Pete and Mikey alone.

Pete moved closer to Mikey, leaning his head on his shoulder and mumbling, “I hope he's okay. He seems really shaken up over all of this.”

“I don't think he's okay. The guy he's been closest to since he was a kid is a gigantic piece of crap who probably hates him, I don't think there's anyway to be okay after that. Plus, I think he feels guilty for what he said to Tyler. The whole ‘everyone hates you’ thing.”

“In his defense, everything Josh said was true. Only like two people in youth group talk to him anymore, and those people are Dallon and Jenna. That's most likely why Tyler punched Josh after he said that- deep down Tyler knows it's true, he just doesn't wanna acknowledge that. Doesn't wanna acknowledge that he's in the wrong in this situation.”

Mikey sighed and ran his fingers through Pete's hair repeatedly, “Yeah, that's true. But honestly, I don't care if he doesn't acknowledge it, ‘cause you and I both know he won't. I just don't wanna have to deal with him anymore.”

“Are you talking about Tyler?” Josh asked from where he was standing in the doorway. Mikey didn't realize he had come back already, but just nodded in reply. Josh sighed and came back over to the bed, sitting in between Pete and Mikey again.

“Fuck, I'm so fucking- I don't know. Pissed, maybe? I don't even know anymore. I just wish he wasn't such a fucking asshole,” Josh said, sounding angry and upset.

“I know what you mean, it's not like any of us want this,” Pete said.

“It's not even just that, I'm also angry at myself for not telling him off a long time ago. I mean, I knew what he was doing was shitty, but I was too fucking cowardly to actually stand up to him. You guys put up with so much bullshit and I just sat by and let it happen.”

“Just because you didn't start throwing punches the second Tyler started being a dick doesn't mean you didn't do anything,” Mikey pointed out, “You helped us in a lot of ways. Remember when I was completely grounded from everything and you'd help pass messages between me and Pete? That isn't just you sitting by and letting it happen. You might not have immediately stopped hanging out with him, yes, but considering you had been friends for so long, that isn't surprising. You don't have to beat yourself up because it was hard to let go of a friend.”

“Plus,” Pete started, “You totally wrecked him earlier, so there's that. I'm definitely sure your punch was harder than his was.”

Josh laughed and shook his head, saying, “You guys always know how to make me feel better. I'm sorry for being all bitchy about this, I just felt like I shouldn't have waited this long to do something about Tyler.”

“Don't worry, babe, it's okay. You didn't have to do anything earlier, I promise,” Mikey kissed Josh on the cheek softly.

“Okay, thank you. I love you two, ya know? Like, seriously.”

Mikey grinned widely, “I love you too, Josh!”

“I third the loving thing,” Pete said, giggling slightly.

Mikey kissed both Pete and Josh, before snuggling up close to them both. They all were laughing and holding each other and, in that moment, Mikey felt content.

\----------

Right after Mikey came home the next day, he immediately went into Gee’s room and told her everything that had happened the day before, finishing off with what went down with Tyler. She started laughing when Mikey described Pete and Ashley dragging him away from Josh, saying, “Well if you guys are gonna be in a band together I guess you don't need bouncers!”

“Gee, we wouldn't need bouncers anyway.”

“But this way if you do get huge and famous- which lets be real, you're definitely gonna get huge and famous- you won't need to hire anyone! You can just intimidate people with,” She gestured vaguely at Mikey, “Y’know, your own muscles or whatever.”

“Okay, first of all,” Mikey started, “We most likely aren't gonna get famous, what the fuck. Second of all, what muscles? I'm like a string bean with a brain.”

“Well obviously not your muscles! I mean Pete and Ashley, also Josh. They all have muscles, actually. A very terrifying bunch of people.”

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes, “They're the least terrifying group of people I could think of.”

“Ashley could be pretty terrifying if she wanted to, same with Pete. Josh... not so much, but he still could beat someone up if he needed to.”

“Why are you trying to dissect how terrifying my band mates are?”

“To figure out if I'll need to come with you on tour, obviously,” Gee said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“We're not going on tour like... any time soon, Gee.”

“But when you do go, I'll be there! To protect you, obviously.”

“No, don't come with us. Start your own band and tour with them yourself!”

“Fine, but we're just gonna be your competition. I'll steal all your songs before you can do anything with them, and than record better versions of each song so you are stuck with nothing.”

“You're a cruel person, ya know that?”

Gee winked, “Oh, I know.”

\----------

It was the day of the talent show and Mikey was starting to get jittery. He knew it probably was just because he would be playing something in front of an actual audience, instead of just practicing with only the band hearing, but he couldn't help being nervous. It was just the church, why was he so scared?

Mikey was getting ready in his room, when Gee walked in and sat on his bed. He could tell she was nervous without even looking at her, so he continued getting ready as he asked, “What's the problem?”

“I just found out Frank's gonna perform today. Did you know that? Why didn't he tell me? Is he hiding something from me?”

Mikey sighed and turned to her, hands on his hips as he said, “Maybe he wanted it to be a surprise. Like, not wanting you to known until the last minute, or something. Did he tell you what he was gonna be doing?”

Gee chewed on her lip and pushed her hair behind her ear, than replied, “He wasn't the one who told me, it was his friend Laura. She texted me asking what the church's address was because ‘Frank was an idiot and didn't tell her and now he's not replying to any of her texts.’ I asked why she needed the address and she said that he was gonna be performing tonight and she wanted to watch. I'm so confused, why didn't he tell me? Apparently he didn't even tell Laura what song he was doing. What if he's gonna break up with me?”

“Okay, first of all, he's definitely not gonna break up with you. Why the fuck would he break up with you? That makes no sense. Second of all, you’re gonna find out what song he's doing in like, one hour, so chill. Just be patient and realize that he's not gonna break up with you in front of the entire church via a song, what the fuck.”

“He might!”

“If he does I'll punch him in the face, deal?”

“Fine, deal,” Gee grumbled, before getting up and leaving Mikey's room.

Mikey finished getting ready, than waited not so patiently for his family to be ready too. He didn't want to be too annoying about it, though, so he just sat in Gee’s room and talked with her until they finally left.

When they got to the church, Mikey went to look for Josh and Ashley, who had texted him earlier saying that they had arrived already. They were sitting together at he front of the sanctuary, Josh black skinny jeans and his Vesperteen shirt while Ashley wore a short, glittery silver dress. Mikey sat next to Josh and smiled at them, saying, “Hey guys! I take it Pete's not here yet?”

“Nope,” Josh replied, “He should be here soon, though. He just texted me saying he's on his way.”

“Cool. Thank god he lives so close to the church, or else he’d be way too late if he just left,” Mikey laughed.

“Thank god indeed,” Ashley giggled.

When Pete got there, the four of them went through the song a few times before finding out when they would be going on stage. They were one of the first people to go on, which Mikey was happy about. It would get things out of the way quickly so he wouldn't have to be a nervous wreck for most of the night.

Soon before the show was supposed to start, Mikey saw Frank sitting im the back hallway tuning his guitar. Mikey sat beside him and said, “What song are you doing?”

Frank seemed visibly startled, not having seen Mikey come up next to him most likely. He than looked embarrassed, blushing slightly and replying, “Uhm, it's a surprise.”

“Okaayy.... you do you.... Just make sure you tell Gee that you don't hate her, okay? She's been freaking out all day ever since your friend Laura told her that you were performing tonight.”

Frank groaned and hid his face in his guitar, saying, “Laura did what? Fuck, I told her it was supposed to be a surprise.”

Mikey shrugged, “Apparently she needed the address of the church and you didn't tell her.”

“Fuck, I'm an idiot.”

Mikey patted Frank's head, “It's true, you are an idiot. But anyways, I gotta go. I was going to go pee before I had to go on stage, but someone distracted me before I could actually do that.”

“You didn't have to come over here!”

“Well whatever, you still distracted me,” Mikey said with a laugh, than got up and waved Frank goodbye as he headed towards the bathroom.

When he got back to Pete, Josh, and Ashley, the show had already started and he made sure to be quiet as he walked through the aisle to where they were. Hayley and Ariel were currently playing on stage. They were doing How He Loves Us, Hayley playing the ukelele while they both sang, and Mikey thought they were doing quite a good job with it.

One by one each person went up to do their act and next thing Mikey knew the four of them were being ushered back stage because they were going up next.

Mikey was full of nerves as he walked out on stage, holding his guitar and watching the floor as he walked. He knew it wasn't actually that many people, but goddamn was he nervous. He looked up only just to see Ashley, Pete, and Josh get in place on stage and waited for Ashley to give the signal to start playing. When she gave the signal, Mikey had a brief moment of panic before he started playing. Thankfully, no one seemed to notice that he was slightly delayed, and now that he was playing he actually felt quite good about himself.

“Laying in the yard and we worship the stars,” Ashley started singing, looking confident and beautiful with the spotlight shining on her, “And I blow your mind, while you kiss my scars and we know, that we glow.

“Wasted for a week when you get what you seek,” She continued singing, moving around the stage more, her eyes sparkling as she sung, “The precious will fade into grin mystique. But we hope, and we grow.”

“We’ll love if we wanna,” Mikey could now hear Josh singing behind him, and he smiled to himself as the chorus continued, “And we’ll go where we wanna go! Tripping out in Arizona, shatter in the night. We go! Freaking out in Barcelona, shatter in the night.”

They played the rest of the song, Pete occasionally moving around the stage so he was on Mikey's side. He would bump his head against Mikey's shoulder, before going off to his side again. It was so much fun playing on stage with him and Josh and Ashley, and Mikey really hoped this wasn't the only time the four of them ever played on stage together.

The song ended and the four of them took their bows before leaving and heading back to their seats. Before they actually got there, Pete pulled Mikey and Josh into the bathroom. Mikey was stifling giggles, trying not ro indicate to anyone outside the door that there was three boys inside this bathroom. Nope, there was definitely just the regular amount of boys in the bathroom.

Pete was just grinning widely at Mikey and Josh, he looked so pretty like this. Mikey could tell that he was buzzing with energy- Mikey knew this because he also was buzzing with energy, he felt like he was being consumed by it. Pete pulled the two other boys into a hug and whispered, “That was so fun, holy shit! I love you two.”

“I love you two, too!” Josh whispered back, a grin spreading across his face as he looked between Pete and Mikey. He giggled and than kissed them, one after the other. When Josh stopped kissing Pete, Mikey took his place and kissed Pete deeply. He hadn't expected to kiss any more boys inside of the church ever again, but he was. It felt good, like a simple and pure act of rebellion. The honest to god best way to rebel in a world like this was to be a boy who loved another boy.

Or, more accurately, to be a boy who loved two other boys.

He was still scared of getting caught, but something had clicked inside of him that made him less scared. Like he knew that if he got caught, things would work out well in the end. Maybe he was just being stupid, but he just felt stronger the more love he had. Like if he had Josh and Pete by his side, things will always turn out okay.

When he finally got back to his seat, Mikey couldn't sit still. He spent the rest of the night full of energy and needing to do something more, just anything. He was impatient and jittery, but he couldn't put his finger on why. He just wanted to do something, but there was nothing for him to do.

He was almost ready to burst by the time the last act, Frank, was going on stage. He had almost forgotten about Frank's “surprise,” but apparently he would be finding out now.

“So, uh, I'm Frank Iero and this is a song by a band I used to think was dumb as hell, but than a good friend of mine kinda showed me that okay, maybe they aren't completely dumb as hell. Anyways, here we go.”

Frank started playing the song, and Mikey couldn't help laughing out loud when he realized what it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [this](https://youtu.be/a1DsxNIN0wA) is the first song they were talking about (What We Could Have Been - Vesperteen)! Also fun fact: my sister is in that video :0 she's the one w the kitten on her shoulder ! 
> 
> also [this](https://youtu.be/zFY5gA2LRbU) is the song that they cover during the talent show (Shatter in the Night - Vesperteen)
> 
> also what? this fic just a clever ruse to get yall to listen to Vesperteen? i would never! ;)
> 
> anyways... as per usual, feel free to leave comments/kudos and to hmu on tumblr (@queercassianandor), twitter (@Allegrcat), instagram (@artsy_vampire), and/or snapchat (artsy_vampire)
> 
> have a nice day!


	25. Ephesians 5:19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Listen, all I'm saying is I just really want Jon Foreman to punch me in the face,” Gee said, her words slurring slightly as she tried to stop herself from laughing too much.
> 
> Ray, on the other hand, could not control his laughter at all. He was lying down next to Gee completely losing it, just watching him made her laugh hysterically. Eventually he was able to calm down enough to say, “Gee, what the fuck? I don't think he'd punch anyone in the face. He's like a hippy surfer dad, but like a ridiculously nice hippy surfer dad.”
> 
> “That's why I want him to punch me! Imagine getting punched in the face by a ridiculously nice hippy surfer dad. It'd be fucking amazing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so... here it is folks... the last chapter of Must Have Done Something Right..... honestly this whole thing is so long qnd i am SURPRISED at myself like wtf how the fuck did i write this much of a story?? i cant believe this is the first novel ive ever written... Really Fucking Weird
> 
> anyways... MHDSR might be DEAD but Youth Group is Wild will continue to have fics posted to it, idk how often but i have some planned so dont worry yall... this universe isn't completely dead
> 
> also ? i have a half finished fic that's completely unrelated to this universe that I'll also be posting eventually, so keep ur eyes open for that
> 
> anyways... I'll let u read now..... have fun yall

Gee always hated the end of summer. It always just meant the upcoming school year and she did not want to think about that. She wanted to think about it less this time round, since everyone else her age was going off to college and she was just now trying to figure out what school she wanted to go to.

It also fucking sucked that this meant Ray would be leaving her soon, what the fuck. She knew he had to “go to college” because it was “important, Gee” but still, what the fuck. He couldn't just abandon her like this!

At least she would still have Frank, but now she just felt like a dumb loser who should be off at college but instead was stuck at home trying to figure out how to actually apply to college. It did not help that she was homeschooled, no that made everything more complicated. It was like someone decided to make the college application process even more tedious than it actually was!

A whole new flavor of cruel!

But really, Gee was depressed. She spent her days moping around the house while everyone else had something to do. Even Mikey was going out and doing things, that bastard. He went out to “practice” with Josh and Pete more times than she could count, which okay, probably wasn't actually that many times. But she still could be bitter about it!

One Wednesday, Gee was bitching to Ray about being lonely, so he just shrugged and said, “Then come to my house.”

“Your house?” Gee asked, suddenly confused. She hadn't expected him to actually do anything about her whining, what the hell.

Ray just rolled his eyes, leaning up against the wall as he said, “Yes, my house. We haven't hung out just the two of us in forever, so come to my house. We'll make popcorn and watch Mystery Science Theater 3000. It'll be great.”

Gee clapped her hands together excitedly and flung herself at Ray, hugging him close as she said, “Yes! That sounds amazing! Thank you!”

“Good, anything to make you happy,” Ray said, laughing and hugging Gee back.

Gee eventually pulled away, still grinning at him as she asked, “When do you want me to come over?”

“You can come back with me tonight, if you want,” Ray replied.

“Yes! That sounds perfect! Thank you! You're the best friend ever.”

“You're not gonna be saying that when you remember the drive back to my house.”

Gee waved him off, saying, “Don't ruin this for me, I'm in my happy place right now.”

“Your happy place?”

“Yes! My happy place! It's just me and you staying up all night eating popcorn and watching shit movies.”

“Best happy place ever,” Ray said with a grin.

\----------

They got to Ray's house and immediately went to the kitchen, raiding the cupboards for any snacks they could find. Gee felt like a little kid again, when they would used to hoard all the snacks in Ray's room and stay up all night giggling over the seat of things. Than when the sun would start to rise, Gee and Ray would sneak outside and lay down on his front porch, watching the sun rise over the trees.

It was such a shame that watching the sun rise was less of a novelty and more something Gee would dread every day.

But she wasn't thinking of that right now. No, she was thinking about how much she loved Ray and how she couldn't be happier in this exact moment, watching her best friend make popcorn in the microwave and start some coffee for the two of them.

His mom popped in quickly to say that she would be going to bed, and the two of them had to stay quiet or so help her God she would make them sleep outside with the trees. Gee laughed as Ray rolled his eyes, saying, “Would we ever be annoyingly loud, mom?”

“Yes, that's why I'm giving you the warning,” She replied, her hands on her hips, “But seriously, have fun you two. Been too long since you've been over here, Gerard. Missed seeing your face around here.”

“I missed you too,” Gee said, beaming at Ray's mom. She was such a great person, Gee thought.

When the two of them had all their snacks prepared, they headed towards Ray's room and sat next to each other on the bed. Ray dumped all the food between them, then grabbed his laptop, saying, “Lets get this MST3K marathon going!”

Gee sat with her feet tucked under herself and grinned at Ray, taking a handful of popcorn as she said, “Fuck yes!”

Ray put on the first episode, then leaned back more and let Gee move up closer to his side. God, Gee missed this. She felt so bad for having their friendship grow so distant recently, but she was determined to make it better. She would physically stuff Ray with popcorn until he knew how much she cared about him.

Part way through the episode, Ray turned to Gee and asked, “Y’know, I haven't talked about this stuff with you in forever, but whatever happened with the like, gender thing? Weren't you questioning that shit a while ago? Whatever happened with that?”

Gee sat up a little bit, almost having forgotten that Ray wasn't completely up to date with all of that. She just kinda assumed everyone knew, which was a silly thing to assume considering she's really only been giving Mikey and Frank updates. She tugged on her hair slightly and shrugged, saying, “Uh, I don't fully know my gender yet, but I'm definitely trans? And like, I've almost solely been going by ‘Gee’ cause it's like, gender neutral or whatever.”

“Yeah, I kinda picked up on the Gee thing,” Ray chuckled, “But is there anything else I should know?”

“I’ve also started using she pronouns? Or, more accurately, Mikey and Frank have been using those for me in like, more private settings, since there's no way in hell I’m gonna attempt to tell anyone else. Well, Pete might kind of know, but that's different.”

Ray laughed, “How does Pete know?”

“I kinda wore a dress in front of him once?” Gee replied, “But, in my defense, I definitely did not think that one through. It was that time when Frank invited me to the party, I was wearing that dress and well, Pete was also at that party so...”

“So he saw you in the dress?”

“Exactly. But he never really asked questions about it? So as far as he knows I could just be a gay dude who likes drag.”

“You never told him?”

Gee shrugged, “Felt no reason to. Plus, he could've asked Mikey about it too. I wouldn't really mind if Mikey told him, y’know? I just haven't like, needed to explain to Pete every aspect of my gender or whatever.”

“Ah, okay. That makes sense.”

“Yeah, exactly,” Gee laughed.

“Y’know, I kinda already figured you were probably a girl, considering what Frank said at camp that one time. When he was talking about dating a girl? Anyways, I like, knew you two were still dating, so I was like ‘hm, maybe Gee’s actually a girl.’ I just didn't have a chance to confirm it until now.”

“Well, now it is confirmed,” Gee grinned, “I am, in fact, a girl.”

“Gross, cooties! Get away, get away!” Ray said, laughing and shoving Gee away teasingly, “You got the girl cooties!”

Gee laughed and started poking Ray repeatedly, yelling, “You got the cooties now! You got the cooties!”

When they both had started settling down more, Ray laid down and stared up at Gee. She shifted nervously, avoiding eye contact as he looked at her.

“Hey Gee, wanna get drunk?”

She had not been expecting him to say that, in fact she totally forgot that some families even had alcohol in their homes. But, even though whenever she got drunk she did something she regretted, she replied, “Hell yeah, let's do this.”

\----------

“Listen, all I'm saying is I just really want Jon Foreman to punch me in the face,” Gee said, her words slurring slightly as she tried to stop herself from laughing too much.

Ray, on the other hand, could not control his laughter at all. He was lying down next to Gee completely losing it, just watching him made her laugh hysterically. Eventually he was able to calm down enough to say, “Gee, what the fuck? I don't think he'd punch anyone in the face. He's like a hippy surfer dad, but like a ridiculously nice hippy surfer dad.”

“That's why I want him to punch me! Imagine getting punched in the face by a ridiculously nice hippy surfer dad. It'd be fucking amazing.”

Ray started laughing hard again, and Gee rolled her eyes and lied down next to him. Neither of them were that drunk, they were still fun drunk. Gee hoped she wouldn't get to “reveal all my darkest secrets” drunk at any point, cause then it wouldn't be fun anymore and she'd be stuck having to deal with the consequences. For now, she just laid in bed laughing with Ray as everything around her spinned slightly.

Ray rolled onto his side, so he was looking at Gee, and asked, “So have you and Frank had sex yet?”

Gee burst into laughter again and shoved Ray, saying, “Why the fuck do you care?”

“I'm curious! You've told me jack shit and I wanna know!”

“Fine, I’ll tell you,” Gee said, rolling her eyes at her best friend. She then started telling him everything that had happened with Frank, how good he made her feel. She had to stop talking briefly when she was telling Ray about the whole gagging thing since he was laughing too hard for her to get any words in. It felt so strange telling someone this many details about her sex life. She had told Mikey that certain things had happened, but she never went into too much detail. It felt good though, she had needed to tell someone these things other than Frank. Ray was her best friend and she fucking loved telling him every single detail of her life.

“You've never had sex, right?” Gee asked when she was finally done telling Ray about her everything sexual she had done with Frank.

Ray shook his head, replying with, “Nope, not yet. Haven't gone further than making out, but I don't really care. I've never cared that much about sex. Like, I'm into it, but I just couldn't be bothered to actually try and do anything.”

“Yeah, I get that. It's not the most important thing but that could happen in someone's life.”

“You're just saying that ‘cause you've already had sex,” Ray said teasingly.

“Oh shush! That's not the only reason I'm saying this!”

“Well, it most likely plays a part in it,” Ray said, poking Gee’s stomach slightly, making her stick her tongue out at him.

The rest of the night continued like this, until they both had drunk too much to say anything else coherent. When they reached that point, they got up and started dancing clumsily to shitty pop music. Gee fell onto the floor more times she could count, which was a much lower number than usual because of how much alcohol she had consumed. They danced until they couldn't keep themselves up any longer, than they collapsed onto the floor in a fit of giggles and fell asleep like that.

\----------

Gee woke up the next morning with a pounding in her skull and an ache in her back. Most likely because she had fallen asleep on the floor while super drunk, but she ignored that. She mostly focused on the fact that she felt weirdly good, despite the fact that she should feel like hell. It probably was because all this happened with Ray, and she had needed some sort of stupid thing to do with her best friend. It had been too long, so even though she was in pain, it was all worth it.

Ray seemed to wake up a few moments after Gee had. She was notified of him waking up from the groans of pain that came from the other side of the floor. She gingerly sat up enough to look over at Ray, mumbling, “You dead?”

“Yes,” Was Ray's reply, muffled by the fact that he had his arm covering his face. Gee laughed and laid back down, not ready to get up quite yet.

It took a while longer- and lots of pained noises- for either of them to get up. When they finally did, they made their way into the bathroom and took turns showering and throwing up in the toilet. Truly a wonderful bonding experience.

When they both had gotten slightly less dead, they went into the kitchen and started carefully eating breakfast, eating smaller things so they wouldn't throw up again. They tried to recall everything that had happened the previous night, but both of them had large gaps in memory where they couldn't for the life of them fill.

“I feel like we called someone,” Ray said as he buttered a piece of toast, “I'm not sure who or why, though. I just have this feeling in my gut that we definitely called someone.”

“Hm, maybe it was like Mikey or something?” Gee suggested.

“I hope so. It'd fucking suck if it was someone we didn't know as well.”

“You should see if you called anyone last night,” Gee said, taking a sip of her coffee before adding, “Then we can see if we're fucked or not.”

“Oh, good point,” Ray said, before taking out his phone to see if he called anyone. He shook his head after a bit and replied, “Nope, I got nothing. Check your phone, I feel like if we both vaguely remember calling someone than it must have happened, right?”

“Yeah, you're probably right, I’ll check,” Gee said, taking out her phone while she talked. Her stomach dropped when she saw who she had called at 4:46 AM the previous night, and she immediately had to run to the bathroom to throw up again. Ray followed her into the bathroom, holding her hair up so it wouldn't get into her mouth. It was funny, earlier that morning she had to jump out of the shower to hold back Ray’s hair as he vomited, and now he was doing the same for her. That made her feel weirdly loved.

But suddenly she was remembering who she had called and fuck, what had she said to him? What was the purpose of the call? Was it just a prank call? If not, what had it been?

Gee was starting to panic, her breathing becoming rapid and her eyes blurred over and-

“Gee, c’mon, what happened? Are you alright?” Ray's voice cut through her panicked thoughts and she clung to him, not wanting to let go.

“Ray, I called Frank!” Gee said, wanting to die. What the fuck did she say to him! God, she was a fucking idiot. Why would she ever get drunk? That just always ended in her doing something stupid and ruining everything.

“Oh fuck, do you remember what you said?”

“No! That's what makes this so bad!”

“Okay, so, I'll ask him,” Ray said nonchalantly, as if this wasn't the worst thing ever.

“You can't just ask him! What if it was something bad!”

“Than wouldn't you wanna know so you could fix things?”

“What if it wasn't something bad, but he just thinks I'm weird and needy and calling him again would just make things worse?”

“Gee, you’re catastrophizing. Let me call him.”

Gee sighed and leaned against Ray, closing her eyes and trying to calm down. Ray was right, he was right. There was no harm in Ray calling Frank to ask what was said last night. Most likely it would all just be nonsense, right? She was still scared shitless, but maybe she could let Ray do this thing for her.

Gee pulled away slightly and wiped her eyes, trying to get more composed. She smiled at Ray and said, “Okay, you can uhm. You can call him.”

“Wait, really?” Ray asked, sounding surprised.

“Yeah, you're right. It probably all was nonsense anyway, considering how drunk we were.”

“Yeah, alright, let me just get my phone,” Ray smiled and got up, wobbling a little and holding his head as he mumbled, “Fucking hangovers.”

Gee got up too and made her way back to Ray's room, Ray going towards the kitchen since that's where his phone still was. Gee sat down on his bed and sighed, looking around at all the years of scribbles and art that was on his walls.

It was so weird looking at some of the things she had written in the past, back when she was young and so much different. It was almost like looking back at something a different person had written, she had changed so much. Hell, she wasn't the person she was a year ago. For starters, she hadn't even met Frank a year ago. This time last year she was a completely miserable “boy” who had no idea who or what she was. She still has no idea who or what she is, but at least she has more friends who are supportive and helpful.

It was easier to be queer when everyone else around was also queer. It was special connection, like they all had developed a secret language that made communicating in public so much easier about “incriminating” topics. It was interesting, Gee had never suspected to have any queer friends other than Mikey, but now most of her friends were queer.

Josh and Pete were the most surprising out of everything. Gee had not expected them to end up not straight- especially Josh. Gee had kind of grouped Josh in with Tyler in the homophobia area, but damn was she wrong. Now every five minutes she has to hear Mikey gushing about how wonderful his boyfriends are and damn, she's happy for them all but does he have to be so loud about it?

Ray came back into the bedroom after a few minutes, smiling at Gee and shoving his phone into his pocket. He sat down on the bed next opposite Gee and said, “Good news, it was basically all nonsense!”

“Wait, you called Frank already?” Gee asked.

“Yup,” Ray replied, “He said he couldn't understand most of it because you were slurring a lot, and also apparently we were playing music really loudly. So you don't gotta worry! You didn't confess that you wanna run away and marry him or anything like that.”

Gee laughed, so fucking relieved that it turned out to be nothing. God, she was an idiot, of course it was nothing! She had to work on her tendency to overthink things, it really was negatively affecting her day to day life.

She didn't want to think about her cocktail of mental health issues, though. No, she was too happy for that. Gee grinned and bounced in place, waving her hands about and saying, “I didn't say anything stupid! I didn't say anything stupid!”

Ray started laughing and patted Gee on the head, saying, “I'm proud of you, pal.”

They spent the rest of the morning laying on Ray's bed, trying to recover from their hangovers. It wasn't until late in the afternoon that Gee felt okay enough to go home. Ray was driving her home, so they spent the whole time listening to music and singing along loudly.

When they got to Gee’s house, Gee hugged Ray, squeezing him tight and saying, “Thanks man, I really needed this.”

Ray hugged back and laughed, saying, “Needed to get blackout drunk with your best friend?”

“Well yeah, obviously,” Gee pulled away and grinned, “But seriously, I really did need this. I feel like it's been forever since we did anything like that, I was starting to miss yah.”

“Maybe I'll just break into your house sometime to make sure you don't forget about me.”

“I never said I forgot about you! I just missed you.”

“Well this way you won't miss me either!” Ray said with a grin.

Gee shoved Ray slightly and giggled, saying, “You're silly! I gotta go, gonna bar my windows and lock my doors so you can't break in my home.”

“Boo, where's the fun in that?”

“Sorry if I don't want some weirdo creepin’ in my window at night.”

Ray pouted, “I thought you said I was your best friend.”

“Those things aren't mutually exclusive,” Gee laughed.

“You're so cruel to me, Gee. I can't believe you're treating your best friend like this.”

Gee patted Ray's shoulder and said, “Goodbye, weirdo.”

Gee got out of Ray's car then, waving goodbye as she walked up to her house. She went straight to her room, wanting to get some more sleep after that long night. Her head was stills pounding and she knew she should drink some water, maybe eat some more food, but she couldn't be bothered. Sleep was more important, she thought.

Before she could fall asleep, Mikey burst into the room and excitedly yelled, “Gee, I’m in a band!”

Gee groaned and covered her head with a pillow, mumbling, “Go away, I'm hungover.”

“Why are you hungover?” Mikey asked, sounding confused.

“I slept over with Ray and we got blackout drunk.”

“Did you guys make out again?”

Gee moved the pillow to look at Mikey, “What do you mean ‘again?’”

“Didn't you guys make out the first time you ever got drunk?”

“Oh, uh, I can't remember honestly.”

Mikey rolled his eyes than went to sit on the bed next to Gee, saying, “Whatever, that's not important. I gotta tell you about my day yesterday. It was intense.”

Gee sat up and crossed her legs, getting into a more comfortable position before asking, “So, what was so intense about it?”

“Okay, well first of all, we started a band together!” Mikey said with a grin.

“Who's we?” Gee asked.

“Pete, Josh, Ashley, and I, obviously. Who else would it be?”

Gee shrugged, “I don't know, I don't pay attention to anything.”

“Well whatever, all you gotta know is we're all now officially in a band together. We’re called Death by Glitter.”

“That sounds like how I'm gonna die.”

“That's what Pete said!”

“Awh, he knows me so well!”

Mikey laughed, “Yeah, that's true. But wait, the band isn't even the most interesting part. So we stopped practicing for a bit and were just hanging out in Josh's living room, right? Than guess who showed up?”

“Uh, who?”

“Tyler! Like, he came over to see if Josh wanted to hang out, yknow? Than Josh was all ‘I don't wanna hang out with you!’ and Tyler flipped out, than Josh punched him in the face. After that Ashley and Pete dragged Tyler out of Josh's house! It was fucking awesome.”

“Are you telling me I missed Tyler getting punched again? Mikey, my sweet brother, you gotta tell me about these things before they happen! I never miss an opportunity to see someone deck Tyler right in the face.”

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes, “What? You want me to go back in time so I can inform you before it happened?”

“Yes, please and thank you.”

You're ridiculous.”

“I try,” Gee grinned, then started laughing and said, “Well if you guys are gonna be in a band together I guess you don't need bouncers!”

“Gee, we wouldn't need bouncers anyway.”

“But this way if you do get huge and famous- which lets be real, you're definitely gonna get huge and famous- you won't need to hire anyone! You can just intimidate people with,” She gestured vaguely at Mikey, “Y’know, your own muscles or whatever.”

“Okay, first of all,” Mikey started, “We most likely aren't gonna get famous, what the fuck. Second of all, what muscles? I'm like a string bean with a brain.”

“Well obviously not your muscles! I mean Pete and Ashley, also Josh. They all have muscles, actually. A very terrifying bunch of people.”

Mikey laughed and rolled his eyes, “They're the least terrifying group of people I could think of.”

“Ashley could be pretty terrifying if she wanted to, same with Pete. Josh... not so much, but he still could beat someone up if he needed to.”

“Why are you trying to dissect how terrifying my band mates are?”

“To figure out if I'll need to come with you on tour, obviously,” Gee said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“We're not going on tour like... any time soon, Gee.”

“But when you do go, I'll be there! To protect you, obviously.”

“No, don't come with us. Start your own band and tour with them yourself!”

“Fine, but we're just gonna be your competition. I'll steal all your songs before you can do anything with them, and then record better versions of each song so you are stuck with nothing.”

“You're a cruel person, ya know that?”

Gee winked, “Oh, I know.”

  
“I’m leaving! Goodbye, you terrible backstabber.”

“Good! I wanted to sleep anyway,” Gee grumbled as Mikey left her room. She seriously needed to get some sleep or she would probably die. She lied back down on her bed and went to sleep.

\-----

The days leading up to the talent show weren't ideal for Gee. All of her friends were busy practicing for the talent show, so she was stuck doing nothing at home. That would have been fine, except Mikey was also always out so now she had absolutely no one. Even Ray seemed to be busy doing things, so she couldn't ask him to hang out either.

Also, Frank seemed to be ignoring Gee. She technically had no reason to suspect something was wrong, except for the fact that he hadn't texted her for days. Or, more accurately, he had been texting her, but he had just been acting so distant. So even though he was technically talking to her, it felt like he was just doing it out of obligation.

On top of all this, Gee could barely get to sleep at night, even worse than usual. Even if she was able to sleep, she had awful nightmares and never got any rest. It felt like every move she made was a reminder that she would one day die, that she was slowly decaying and Hell was waiting for her when she finally did die. Every waking moment was spent feeling nauseous and shaky, which made her even more afraid. She felt trapped, it's not like she asked to exist, so why did she have to be alive?

It scared her that her future had two routes: continue with her current “lifestyle” and go to Hell, or become a Christian and abandon every single one of her friends because some potentially fake God thinks they're unfit for a good afterlife. It was terrifying and sickening and Gee had had enough.

Nothing could even make her feel better, all the words people would say to “help” just managed to make things worse. The only way to fix any of this was to make her never have existed, but that wasn't exactly possible so she was fucked.

The one upside was this constant fear of death made Gee’s suicidal tendencies never get too serious. If debilitating fear and paranoia made it so she would try to extend her life for as long as possible, than goddamn at least that's something.

Nothing like the end of summer to bring up all those traumas that Gee tried to suppress at all times.

Because of all this, Gee spent most of her time curled up on her bed and playing all her favorite songs as loud as she could. It was the only way to distract her from spiraling completely, especially since no one seemed to have enough time to talk to her anymore. She just wanted everything to be over, she just wanted some rest.

Gee was in a slump, to say the least.

The day of the talent show finally came, which was a surprise to Gee because it had felt like no time had passed since her sleepover with Ray. It also somehow felt like years had gone by, but that was irrelevant. Time wasn't real anyway.

The only way Gee actually knew the day was because she got a text from Laura asking her what the church's address was, which surprised Gee because why did Laura want to know the address?

When Gee asked her this, Laura replied, “Frank invited me to some talent show he's gonna be in, but he also never told me the address cause he's a fucking idiot.”

Gee was shocked by this. Frank hadn't told her he was going to be in the show, why had he kept that from her? What was he gonna play? Was he gonna somehow break up with her during his performance? Is this why he had been so distant?”

Gee sent Laura the address on autopilot, not fully conscious of what she was typing. Hopefully it was the correct address, she didn't want to mess anything up for Laura.

Gee got put her phone down on her bed and walked to Mikey's room, still not completely aware of everything. He didn't even turn around to look at her before he asked, “What's the problem?”

  
Gee explained what had happened, hoping that Mikey would understand where she was coming from. Sadly all he did was say she “probably had nothing to worry about” and she “should just ask Frank about it,” or some nonsense like that. She had a yearly amount of good advice she could actually listen to and she had already run out of it all.

So talking to Mikey was a bust.

She was tempted to just not go, but she couldn't do that to Mikey. Plus, she was kind of curious as to what Frank was gonna do. Okay, she was extremely curious, so she would definitely go.

That didn't erase any fears that she was having about this, though.

Next thing she knew it was time to leave for church and she was back in full panic mode. The entire car ride was hell, and Gee spent most of it thinking of every single possible outcome of the talent show. Okay, maybe she focused on the negative ones a bit too much, but that was irrelevant.

When they got to the church, Gee immediately went to find Ray. She found him in the sanctuary, sitting in one of the front rows and playing his guitar. She sat beside him and asked, “Did you know Frank was gonna be in this?”

“What? Frankie’s gonna play tonight? I didn't know that!” Ray replied, sounding surprised.

“Fuck, why didn't he tell anyone?” Gee mumbled, chewing on her lip nervously.

“Did he not tell you?”

“No, he didn't. I had to find out because his friend let it slip while she asked for directions to the church,” Gee replied.

“Maybe he wanted to surprise you?” Ray suggested.

“That's what I’m scared of! Why would he surprise me? Is he breaking up with me?”

“Okay, so I highly doubt he's gonna break up with you. How would he even break up with you during this sort of thing?”

“He could play a breakup song and make strong eye contact with me while he played,” Gee replied.

“Gee, that's absolutely ridiculous. Frank is not the type to break up with someone that way. He definitely seems more like the ‘break up with you over text’ sort of douche.”

“He’s not a douche at all!”

“He’s kind of a douche,” Ray laughed.

Gee rolled her eyes, “Whatever, he still could break up with me.”

“How ‘bout you forget about him for a few minutes and listen to me play? As a distraction, y’know.”

“What? You fishing for compliments?” Gee said, a smile starting to spread across her face.

“Maybe. Also because I wanna practice more before I have to go on but I still wanna hang with you,” Ray replied.

Gee grinned and pulled her knees up against her chest, “Alright, I’ll sit with you. Play me some tunes, music man.”

Ray laughed and rolled his eyes at Gee, then grabbed his guitar and started playing again. Gee leaned her head down against the back of the chair and tried to calm herself, ignoring everything else and focusing on Ray singing. She barely even noticed as the sanctuary filled up around them, only noticing when Ray stopped playing. She looked up and around the room, then said, “It's probably gonna start soon, isn't it?”

“Yeah, ‘bout ten minutes I think. I’m gonna go put this back stage, I’ll be back in a sec,” Ray said, before getting up and leaving the sanctuary.

Gee was back to worrying about Frank, now that Ray was gone. She so desperately wished that Frank had just told her that he was gonna be performing, even if he kept the song a surprise she would have been happy. It just made no sense.

“Hey, can I sit here?” Laura asked, startling Gee who hadn't noticed she was there.

“Yeah, of course. I don't think anyone would mind,” Gee replied, smiling up at her.

“Alright cool,” Laura smiled back, then sat next to Gee. She stretched her arms over her head, looking around the room as she said, “Y’know, this doesn't look like a church.”

“What's that supposed to mean?” Gee asked, laughing a bit.

“All the churches I’ve ever been to never looked like... this,” Laura replied, gesturing at the room as she did, “Maybe, I just haven't been to a church in too long.”

“Or it was just a different type of church,” Gee suggested, “‘Cause I highly doubt all of them are setup identical to this. Gonna still be some that are more traditional.”

“Yeah, probably,” Laura laughed, “Hasn't been that long since I've gone to church.”

Ray came back then, sitting next to Gee too. He gave Laura a questioning look, which reminded Gee that he hadn't met her yet.

“Laura, this is Ray. Ray, this is Laura, she's Frank’s friend,” Gee said, as Ray leaned over to shake hands with Laura.

“Nice meeting you, Frank tells us absolutely nothing about his friends outside of church,” Ray laughed.

“Yep, he’s a dick like that,” Laura said with a laugh.

Gee shifted in her seat, “So, uh, do you happen to know what song he's gonna play today? Frank, I mean.”

Laura shook her head, “Nope, he said I ‘didn't know the song,’ which is bullshit because I know all the music he listens to, but whatever. He's been weird lately.”

“Weird in what way?” Gee asked, chewing her lip nervously.

“Well for starters, he didn't even tell me about this until a few days ago. Plus he's just not been as into hanging out I guess? He usually only gets like this when he's really depressed, I hope he's alright,” Laura replied.

“Maybe he's just been focused on this?” Ray suggested.

Laura shrugged, “Maybe, it just seems weird that he didn't tell me, or anyone, about it.”

Before Gee could say anything else, pastor Mark had gone up on stage, announcing that the show was about to start. She couldn't help fidgeting anxiously during the first few songs, and only briefly forgot to worry when Mikey’s band- Death by Glitter- started playing. Mikey seemed so happy up there, he kept grinning at Pete and Josh, looking like he really belonged.

Ray was up next, he was playing an original song and Gee felt proud that her best friend was so talented. Even though she had nothing to do with it, and he had just been practicing and writing since he was an infant, that was irrelevant. He was just so good, she wanted to brag to everyone that THAT was her best friend.

Gee only remembered that she was stressed at the very end, when Mark was back up on stage and announcing that Frank was playing next. She immediately froze up, not sure what to expect from this. Laura patted her knee, probably noticing that Gee was freaking out.

Frank got up on stage, holding his acoustic guitar and looking nervous as he waved to everyone in the sanctuary, saying, “So, uh, I'm Frank Iero and this is a song by a band I used to think was dumb as hell, but then a, uhm, good friend of mine kinda showed me that okay, maybe they aren't completely dumb as hell. Anyways, here we go.”

Gee was confused by that, what song was it? Was she the good friend? Is it completely unrelated to her and she's just worrying too much?

When Frank started singing her heart almost stopped, this definitely was about her.

“We should get jerseys, cause we make a good team,” Frank sang, and Gee could swear she heard Mikey laughing somewhere, “But yours would look better than mine, ‘cause you're outta my league.”

Gee was incredibly close to shrieking right then and there, she most definitely wasn't expecting Frank to sing her a love song, what the fuck. Especially not something by Relient K, what. This did explain why he had told Laura that she wouldn't know the song, though. Gee tried to focus more on him singing, though, she didn't want to miss any second of this.

"And I know that it's so cliche to tell you that everyday I spend with you is the new best day of my life," Frank continued singing, looking more confident now, "Everyone watching us just turns away with disgust. It's jealousy, they can see that we've got it going on."

"And I'm racking my brain for a new improved way to let you know your more to me than what I know how to say," Gee couldn't stop grinning, and she could tell that Ray and Laura were giving each other a look by the way she was reacting, but she didn't care, "you're OK with the way this is going to be, this is going to be the best thing we've ever seen

"If anyone can make me a better person you could, all I gotta say is I must've done something good," Gee could tell that Frank was happy too, his face was lighting up and he looked so nice, like he was feeling the exact same way Gee was feeling. It was so incredible that Gee almost hid her face in her hands, because she couldn't deal with how amazing this felt, "I came along one day and you rearranged my life, all I gotta say is I must've done something right, I must've done something right."

Gee was grinning so much during the whole song that her face was starting to feel sore, but she couldn't bring herself to stop. When the song ended and Frank got off stage, she immediately got up to go find him, needing to see him face to face.

Gee found him backstage, where he was putting his guitar away. She went up to him and tapped his shoulder, letting him know she was there. He jumped slightly, then turned around and grinned when he saw it was Gee. He hugged her tightly and said, “Did you like it?”

“Did I like it? I loved it!” Gee squealed, holding him tightly. She didn't even care if he was getting squished, she was too happy to let him go.

Frank laughed and kissed her cheek, “I’m glad, I wanted to surprise you so, yeah. I'm glad it was good.”

Gee pulled away slightly so she could look actually look at Frank. His hair seemed longer than she remembered, maybe he hadn't gotten it cut recently. She ran her fingers through his hair and mumbled, “I love you.”

It left her lips before she realized what she was saying, and she suddenly was scared she ruined a perfect moment. But Frank didn't seemed freaked out, he just grinned and said, “I love you too!”

“Wait, really?” Gee asked, now even more surprised.

“Uhm, yeah? Why else do you think I’d surprise you with a love song in front of your entire church?” Frank laughed.

“I don't know! You wanted to be nice?”

“Well, yeah, that too. But also I just wanted a cool intro to telling you that I loved you. I had wanted to say it back ever since you told me in the middle of the night that one time and-”

“Wait,” Gee interrupted, “What time in the middle of the night?”

Frank shrugged, “It was a few weeks ago? You were with Ray? I'm pretty sure you were drunk, considering Ray called me the next day asking if you had said anything stupid when you drunk called me.”

“Did you tell him I told you I loved you?” Gee asked, about ready to go punch Ray for not telling her that she said that.

“I mean, that was basically the only thing you said to me, so yeah?”

“Oh, I’m gonna punch that asshole for not telling me-” Gee turned to go find Ray, but Frank stopped her, saying, “Babe, don't. He probably did that so you wouldn't freak out. Like, be real, you would've freaked out if you knew then, right?”

Gee chewed her lip, “Yeah, you're right. But still, I can't believe I don't remember telling you I love you for the first time.”

“We can just pretend that this time was the first time?” Frank suggested.

Gee smiled, “Okay, sure. I love you, Frank.”

“I love you too, Gee.”

In that moment, standing alone with Frank in the back of the church, the dulled sound of people talking in the sanctuary filling up the silence, Gee finally was starting to believe that Frank did actually like her.

The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAH ive had that last scene at the talent show planned since the VERY BEGINNING like i had the ending planned before like 99% of the shit that happened in this lmaoo !
> 
> anyways... i know it was ridiculous but this entire fic is ridiculous so i hopef yall liked it anyway!!!
> 
> as always feel free to leave comments/kudos and hmu on tumblr (@queercassianandor), twitter (@Allegrcat), instagram (artsy_vampire), and/or snapchat (artsy_vampire) !! im cool and post lots of pics of my pets its a fun time
> 
> (thats a lie im not cool but i do post a lotta pics of my animals)
> 
> okay okay im done now HAVE A GOOD DAY I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU WHO READ THIS ESPECIALLY THOSE PPL WHO STARTED TALKING TO ME BECAUSE OF THIS YALL KNOW WHO U ARE !!!!! peace out ✌ 


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